"I am out with lanterns, looking for myself."

-Emily Dickinson

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"You can always hug me if you're scared," Max said, glancing at Kate, who sat beside him.

"But I'm not scared." Kate shook her head.

"But you can still hug me."

Ivan rolled his eyes at Max's words.

His friend seemed to be failing at flirting with a big "F".

Wow, so many Fs there!

"Aww! Don't tell me the sunflower is scared."

Ivan smothered a chuckle at Kate's words.

Kate hugged Max briefly and pinched his cheek. Max closed his left eye and held her hand.

Ivan groaned internally when the two gazed at each other with small smiles.

"Guys, there's a room upstairs." Ivan pointed at the staircase. His gaze lingered on the wall near the stairs for a moment.

There was definitely a shadow there, or so he thought.

He blinked and glanced at Max, who looked at him with flushed cheeks.

Ivan didn't know what his friend's deal was. What was he trying to do?

He had grown close to both Sarah and Kate during the rehearsals.

Ivan didn't know what to think of it.

He sighed and glanced at Elena, whose eyes were glued to the television screen.

The four of them were sitting on the couch, watching a Horror movie much to Ivan's dismay.

He wasn't too enthusiastic about it and had even said so.

But the twins' bunny teeth grinning at him smugly, were too irksome to handle.

So, here he was, the twins' shoulders almost squeezing him in between their constant movements.

What was so exciting about a Horror movie anyway?

All he wanted was to sleep under a blanket, especially with his face covered.

But to prove that he wasn't scared, he decided to appear nonchalant.

Even if he was screaming like a little girl on the inside.

Fab, fascinated, and fine was what he looked like.

Wow, so many Fs again!

Frightened, fidgety, and frantic was his heart, when the girl in the movie walked in the quiet forest.

Wow, so many Fs yet again!

His hands, cold like ice, rubbed against the warm couch. He turned his eyes away from the TV and stared at Elena.

She was awfully quiet since Ivan had arrived at the Russo household.

Ivan didn't want to spend a night in the twins' home, but he had no choice as his parents were out of town.

Whenever he entered the twins' house, it left him queasy.

Something could either be familiar or strange, but how could it be both?

There was something about the house which he couldn't put a finger on.

The more he thought about it, the more his head seemed to grow heavier.

He glanced at the TV, the face of the possessed girl widening his eyes. He shifted on the couch, trying his best to calm his racing heart.

He looked at his closed fists, hoping the scene would quickly pass.

"It's not real, Van," Elena whispered, the side of her face hidden by the silky curtain of her hair. "Reality is far more horrifying."

Ivan frowned. Elena never spoke without making eye contact.

He shut his eyes tightly, the gibberish uttered by the possessed girl unsettling him.

It wouldn't be so bad if the movie was playing with the lights on.

But the twins had switched off all the lights, heightening the Horror feels.

He glanced at the staircase for a distraction, the shadow visible once again.

Was that a shadow? Or was it someone standing there?

Against the darkness of the house, someone or something in white glimmered there.

Ivan's eyes widened. He got up and asked Kate to shift to Elena's side.

He glanced at Max nervously and pointed a shaky finger at the wall opposite.

Max furrowed his eyebrows, his mouth full of French fries, his fingers clutching some of them.

Max glanced at the wall, shrugged, and continued munching the fries.

Ivan glared at him and hit the back of his head.

He wanted to take another peek at the wall, but he decided against it.

What if that thing was still present?

He shuddered and picked up a fry. He nibbled it, his mind not at ease.

Why were the twins adamant about watching a Horror movie?

It was as if they knew he was easily scared by it.

How did they know about him? How were they so sure?

Who were the Russo twins?

Did he know them? Or did they know him? Or both?

He rubbed his forehead with a hiss, the questions circling his mind like a predator.

He closed his eyes, meeting the darkness. He opened them to meet darkness once again.

Black was his favorite color.

As far as he knew, black was the equivalent of darkness.

How could he love the color and be scared of it the same time?

He wondered what had made the darkness seem so horrible to him.

Was it because someone had locked him in a dark room?

Was it because he got lost in some woods at night?

The question paper in his mind seemed lengthy and the time was infinite, but there was nothing to write.

There were no books, nor any information.

Who would give him all his answers when he didn't have them himself?

He glanced at the twins sitting on his right side. Did they know something he didn't?

But how would they? They were here for barely half a year.

Yet he felt that he had known them all his life. Or was it just a farfetched thought?

Nothing seemed clear.

His mind, his heart, his thoughts, everything seemed fuzzy.

Fuzzy.

Not another F, not again!

Kate nudged him, making him glance at her.

The TV's lighting fell on her pale face, making her seem ghastly.

What raced his heart were her eyes. They weren't sparkling like they usually did.

Instead, they appeared dark, almost black and he shifted a little away from her.

"What's with your eyes?" Ivan whispered.

"What's with them?" Elena asked with a smile, her eyes blackened as well.

The whooshing of the wind reached his ears out of nowhere.

He shut his ears and tapped Max's shoulder hastily. "Look at them!"

Max glanced at the twins and shrugged. "What? They're watching the movie."

Elena glanced at Ivan with a smile, her eyes dark, but not black. "Everything's okay, Van."

"Or is it?" Kate whispered in his ears, her voice soft and eerie.

He backed away, only to notice her blackened eyes.

Ivan got up, ignoring his racing heart, the whooshing of the wind, and the TV screen.

Enough of his fear of darkness, of ghosts, of the unknown.

He hit his fist on the table and sprinted towards the switch. With a growl, he pressed the button and the house lighted up in white.

He blinked his eyes and glanced at the wall near the stairs, where a white gown was hung.

He clenched his teeth and glared at the twins as he got closer to them.

"What the hell was that?" he growled, holding Elena's shoulder, who looked at him with doe-like eyes.

"I wanted to prove--"

"Prove that I'm a big wimp?"

He glared at Kate, her black and gold eyes glancing at him before looking at her feet.

"That you haven't changed." Elena pursed her lips and touched his palm.

Ivan raised one eyebrow at her. "Change? What change?"

The twins looked at each other. Elena cleared her throat and opened her mouth, but no words came out.

"We know that you're scared of the dark." Elena scratched her head.

"That's why she said you haven't changed," Kate added while removing the black lens.

Ivan looked hard at the twins. If they thought he would buy their lie, they were wrong.

"What was all this for?" he questioned instead.

As much as he wanted to know what they meant, his mind had much to sort out already.

Elena inched closer and licked her lips. "Van... we know that you're scared of the dark."

"And your point is?"

"We want you to get rid of it."

"And you did good," Max intervened and patted him on the back.

"So, you knew about this?" Ivan asked, his mouth set in a thin line.

Max shook his head. "But I understand why they did so."

Elena inched forward, till their faces were a little apart. "I'm sorry."

Ivan was engulfed in her hug, her hand rubbed his back and he felt his eyes drooping to a close.

"I know darkness is a scary place, but I'll be with you always," Elena whispered in Ivan's ears, her voice soft, despite its breaking.

"Together we will find the light."

Ivan wrapped his arms around her waist, his head resting in the crook of her shoulder.

Elena's breaths slowed down, along with his own as they stood to embrace each other.

Was it wrong to say that she had taken away his fears?

Was it wrong to say that her light glimmered in the darkness of his life?

Was it wrong to say that he had started liking this light?

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Hey, everyone! 💖 How are you? :) I hope you're having a great day/night.

I know I'm late with this update, but the past week had been really tough for me. My mom was hospitalized twice and it was really worrying. She's perfectly fine now alhamdolillah (it means thank God in Arabic). :)

So, what do you think of this update?

What do you think of Ivan and his fear of darkness?

What do you think of his thoughts?

I was really nervous before writing because I felt that what if I can't put together everything I've in mind?

I'm really attached to TAM, the characters, and the plot too, so it always makes me anxious when I write.

Did you like this update? Please say yes. *looks at you with puppy eyes*

Sneak-Peek of Episode 34:

Will the twins be able to dig more into Ivan's past?

Keep smiling! 💕
Lots of love❤💙
Sakina

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