after our chat, luke was insistent that i come back to the studio with him. i tried to get out of it, making all sorts of excuses ranging from homework to staff infection, but none of them seemed to worked.

he wrapped his arms around me tightly, and in an instant, we ended up on the couch in the studio.

well, actually i ended up on the couch, and he ended up on me.

he chuckled, looking down at me from his position on top of me,"guess i better work on the landing, huh?"

reggie coughed to gain our attention, clearly uncomfortable by the scene,"i'd say so."

luke quickly scrambled off of me, standing up and offering me a hand.

i grabbed onto it tentatively, my cheeks burning hot from the situation we had found ourselves in just moments ago.

"thanks." i muttered quickly, walking away from him to stand next to reggie.

the bassist gave me a small smile, clearly just as embarrassed to have caught us like that,"hey, jordan."

"hey, reg," i replied, aimlessly grabbing onto a lavender electric guitar,"lavender. nice."

luke smiled, biting his lip excitedly,"i'm glad you think that, cause it's actually...for you."

i gave him a confused look, barely able to follow his train of thought,"i'm sorry, you got me a guitar?"

"it was bobby's," he admitted, holding his hands up to stop me from responding,"and i'm giving it to you for a reason."

i stared at him blankly, expecting for him to
elaborate on his claim.

when he didn't, i sucked my teeth in annoyance,"and why are you giving it to me, luke?"

julie walked through the door, giving the room a slightly confused look,"i heard talking. figured it was either you guys or murderers."

i shrugged, glancing down at the guitar,"why can't it be both?"

julie chuckled and walked over to stand next to me as luke grinned excitedly,"we've actually been waiting for you to get home."

"why?" i knit my eyebrows, sharing a suspicious look with julie.

"we have some pretty major news to tell you guys," luke wrapped his arm around reggie, pulling him close. he was clearly ecstatic about whatever it is he wanted to let us know,"we had a band meeting earlier, and..." reggie started to drum on his legs, before luke continued,"we wanna invite you two to join sunset curve! and, no, you're not dreaming."

a small frown formed on my face, knowing this was probably the craziest thing he's ever said. it killed me to wipe the smile off of his face, considering the fact that it was such a cute one, but he had to know that this would never work.

"oh." julie replied flatly, both of us clearly on the same page.

"oh?" luke questioned, giving us an incredulous look,"she said oh. okay, that's what you say when you get socks for your birthday, not when you're invited to join the best band ever."

julie shrugged, his words having little to no affect on her,"sorry. i'm honored, but i can't think about anything but flynn right now. she's still mad at me for lying. she hasn't even texted me back!"

"yeah, you're in a tough spot," luke nodded in agreement, letting out a small breath. but clearly his mind was on something other than julie and flynn's relationship, because in the exact same breath he asked,"so you wanna join the band?"

i elected to stay quiet, though i definitely had strong opinions about the invitation i had just received. it just couldn't let them down until they absolutely needed me to.

and right now, they were focused on julie.

julie's face fell flat, giving him a blank expression as she started to walk away,"read the room, dude."

"oh, come on!" luke called after her, causing her stop as he kept speaking,"we need you and you need us, because you need music," he continued to shove his foot in his mouth, clearly willing to lose all his wits about himself just to start a band,"we found this poem that you wrote. and reggie and i, we added this really cool melody to it. it sounds awesome."

julie shot him an angry look, upset that he had gone through her possessions,"where did you find that?"

luke's face fell as he pulled reggie in front of him as a shield,"uh...definitely not your dream box."

he gripped onto the paper, strolling over to the piano. i continued to watch the scene unfold, half hoping they would just forget i was there.

"you went through my stuff?" julie asked incredulously, pushing past reggie to chase after luke.

reggie smiled, nodding happily,"yeah, we can do that now!"

"no, no you can't!" julie exclaimed, chasing luke around the piano before they came to a stop at opposite sides of it,"boundaries. give it back!"

"no!" luke replied, jumping onto the piano bench,"you need to realize how insanely talented you are, okay? listen to this."

as he started to sing the lyrics, i couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy. he was so passionate about julie and her talent, it almost made me feel inferior.

like the invitation i had been given to join the band was as a curtesy. maybe they felt they had an obligation to ask me to join, because some divine spirit transported me to that stage today. i didn't have the talent she did. that was just a simple fact.

julie let out a sigh as luke finished singing, choosing to confide in the ghost,"i wrote that about flynn when she was helping me with all my mom stuff. i've gotta go."

she started to leave, so luke called after her, "hey, what about the band?"

julie chuckled, opening the doors to leave,"oh, i almost forgot...stay out of my room!"

with those final words, she was gone. which only left the consolation prize: me.

"so, jordan," luke started, looking less than excited that i was all that was left,"you in?"

i glanced at the boy, wanting to tell him how terrible i felt in this moment. how the churning of my stomach only served to make me realize that i wasn't really anything to him.

i was just a girl who looked like a girl he used to love. i didn't have the talent julie did, i didn't care about the music like she did, and i especially didn't have the song writing skills she did.

i thought that because we could touch each other we had some sort of special connection. but this conversation made me realize it was quite the opposite.

it seemed that i would always be the girl who looked like lily. julie was special, and i simply wasn't.

that's all there is to it.

but of course, i couldn't tell him any of this. so, i pressed my lips together, looking at him sympathetically,"luke, come on. this is...just- it's not an option."

he gave me a confused look, not wanting to understand what i was saying,"why not? you saw what we did at your school; we rocked."

"you and julie rocked," i corrected him, my heart wrenching in the slightest,"i stood there strumming a guitar with a dumb look on my face."

reggie knit his eyebrows in confusion,"that's not true, you were awesome."

i sucked in a breath, glancing at him for a moment. those words should have made feel better, but instead they just felt fake.

i wasn't sure how a simple moment between julie and luke had managed to make me feel so terrible. if i were doing some sort of inward reflection, i would say that it was just my own insecurities projecting onto two people who had nothing to do with it.

but that isn't what it felt like.

"i just," i let out an exhausted sigh, not wanting to let them know just how sad this whole situation had made me,"you don't need me, you know? julie can write, a-and sing, and i just-"

"we do need you," luke cut me off, gently grabbing my arm and sitting me next to him on the couch,"i mean, come on, there's a reason you were put on that stage with us. it's fate."

"i don't believe in fate." i replied meekly, refusing to meet his gaze.

luke chuckled, nudging me lightly,"you didn't believe in ghosts either."

i shook my head, unable to match his smile, "well, when fate lands in my friend's studio talking about dying from food poisoning, i'll let you know."

the smile fell from his face, realizing imy solemn mood as he placed a hand on my shoulder,"i was kidding, jo. is everything alright?"

i stared at his hand, knowing i couldn't tell him what had me so somber. it was irrational and crazy and i knew he wouldn't be able to understand.

"you just- you don't need me," i spoke, pushing his hand off of me,"you think you do, because for whatever reason, i was on stage with you today. but i'm not..."

"what's going on with you?" luke asked irritably, clearly not understanding my mood shift,"i swear, lily-"

i sucked in a breath, deciding it was time for me to go. he had said just the exact right thing to make me feel worse.

if i hadn't been fully convinced that my only purpose was to look like luke's old flame, his words had just confirmed it.

i stood up, shaking off the arm that tried to get me to stay,"i'm gonna go."

luke sighed, placing a frustrated hand on his forehead,"jordan, i'm sor-"

"no," i said abruptly, heading for the door,"it's fine, luke."

"your car isn't even here, i brought you here!" he stood up and called after me, mostly just trying to get me to stay.

i opened the doors, refusing to look back,"i'll get an uber."

he threw his hands up, shocked that i was leaving,"what is that?!"

i scoffed and shook my head, shutting the doors behind me.