Why?

Why do I have to hold all these feelings in?

Why can't I let them out?

They tell me it's okay to let them out.

They say they can help, that if I talk about things it will make them better.

But I can't.

I can't get mad at my friends.

It's not that my friends are so great that they're

The kind of people you just can't get mad at,

(sorry, you are great friends though)

It's something wrong with me

That every time I feel mad at them,

I bottle it up.

Why?

I don't even want to bottle it up.

Part of me wants to blow up in their faces and yell at them in front of everyone and know that they're all thinking "what the heck happened to that innocent little girl who never gets mad at anyone and never says a word when someone's rude and never speaks up in her defense but here she is yelling at us like we just killed someone when all we did was-

What exactly did they do?

Nothing. It's me again.

I'm stressed because Christmas is coming and this is the first year that I have to get gifts for all my friends,

And they deserve gifts, they're great friends,

But why do we have to give them to each other four days before break instead of later, when I'm not ready yet, and it's not my fault because I've been obsessing so much over what to get them and whether they'll like it and whether I should have asked what they wanted because now I don't have the excuse that I didn't know what they wanted...

And wow, you can tell I'm getting emotional

Because I forgot to put line breaks in that whole last paragraph.

Stupid line breaks.

Stupid poetry.

Stupid Christmas.

Stupid me.