The president steps on stage and smiles. "This year we have a very young Victor, one who captured our hearts with his special story, the way he treated his alliance like a family, and his overall adorableness. " the audience chuckles. "And now we're proud to announce that he is one of ours! A Victor, going home to awe his district, he'll definitely be back for the Victory Tour next year. And he'll be one of our youngest mentors, being only thirteen years old next year. That'll be some fun." She laughs and then nods to the Gamemakers who will show the original footage of the true winner.

August Rush, the lone Victor of the 70th Annual Hunger Games.

     It’s the finale. I have to wrap my head around that. Twenty-one have died, three remain. Our alliance is down to two, just me and Tay. The only other one out there, we know, is Coriolanus, the crazy one. It terrifies me because, at any moment, he could jump outta nowhere and kill us both. I never ever want to be separated from Tay, even though both of us have slim chances of surviving or protecting each other, I feel a whole lot safer than I would alone.

     “Tay, can we take a short rest?” I asked shyly after awhile. Truthfully I was getting tired of walking endlessly, but also I was afraid if we didn’t stop Tay would collapse.

    “Here, have some water.” I offered as we stopped. She smiled as I pressed the bottle to her lips and lifted it gently for her to drink up. I capped it back up and stuffed it in one of our packs, sitting on a nearby rock. We say nothing, just sit in silence, although there’s no tension. Our senses have all been trained to pick up even the slightest of changes around us since entering the arena. I’m sure in real life we’d either be talking or it would be an awkward silence, but here we’re listening, watching for any signs of trouble.

    Since nothing arouses our curiosity, I decide it’s all right if we chat. I want to ask her about the announcement earlier where the Gamemaker’s told us of the finale. “Tay,” I venture cautiously. She glances over, to show she’s listening. “What do you think they meant when they said, ‘the ultimate hell’?” I pondered, knowing that back home I’d be slapped for saying such an unholy word, but here, I could say whatever I wanted.

  “I’m not too sure, Aug.” She replied, putting on her thinking face. I liked her, she was really very nice and almost like a sister to me. Then a horrible thought rattled me; when this was over I’d either be dead along with her, or living without her. Which one did I want? For the first time ever I wanted to die. Going on without Tay was like getting your right arm cut off, it was not a happy ending in the least. My eyes trailed over to her, she was actually missing her right arm. I had nothing to complain about, I knew if she died, she’d want me to go on. Arm or no arm.  

    I turned back my focus as she continued talking. “They’re all pretty sick and twis-” something sounded in the distance, cutting off her voice. “Get down August!” I was pretty certain that if she had hands, she’d of been pulling me down with her behind the rocks. We peeked out to see what was happening, but nothing met our eyes. Yet the sound continued somewhere, out of sight. I craned my neck as far as I dared without being seen by whatever was lurking; was it a mutation, or Coriolanus? Who knew.

    Suddenly Tay let out this massive scream, yelling at me to run as fast as I can. Without hesitation I bolt from my spot, not daring to look back at whatever was coming. I do, however, have to know if my ally is all right. I can hear her feet pounding against the foliage behind me,  along with her heavy breathing. We just  keep running, until I hear Tay sobbing behind me, somewhere distant. That’s when I know she’s fallen back, and I have to help her, I won’t just leave. I may be small but I’m tough, we can fight off whatever’s – as I spin around to help her, my eyes go wide as they meet the face of Kaleb Smith.

Completely mortified, the questions never leave my brain as I’m running to my partner; wasn’t he dead? The answer is clear as Kaleb falls and impales himself, only to stand back up, right as rain; Kaleb Smith is dead. What stands before me is clearly a Capitol mutation of some kind, they’ve somehow brought his body back to life, but he is not the Kaleb I knew.

    Tay and I finally meet, and we run farther away from the undead creature. At last Tay looks back, and Kaleb is no longer there. We slow to a stop, panting so hard from the run. It takes a lot of self-control for me not to just collapse on the ground and sleep for a bit. Tay looks up at me, we’re both thinking the same thing. “August, we have to  get somewhere safe, now.” She orders. I nod quickly, about to scan our surroundings when a giant earthquake sends us grasping for stability. Massive storm clouds start to surround the cornucopia; I turn to Tay. “I think I know what they meant by ultimate hell now.” I speak with a shiver in my tone.

  It’s been fifteen minutes since the earthquake and the storm clouds. While the clouds still remain, the earth stands still once again. Tay and I have stayed in our spot, brainstorming ideas for a safer place.

   “This might sound crazy, but I need you to trust me.” Tay suddenly speaks up, capturing my attention. “I think we should head to those storm clouds.” She continues.

   “But Tay, don’t clouds usually mean a storm? If we go there it’ll be bad.” I argue, shaking my head slowly.  She nods, but stands anyway. “I think it’s where they want us to go. We can’t prolong this any more, this has to end.” She begins walking in the direction of the ever darkening clouds, leaving our little pocket of safety under the trees.

    I run to catch up with her as a breaking twig frightens me. “Okay, fine. But that means one of us has to die if the other one is going to win.” I point out tragically. Tay stops in her tracks, but refuses to face me. She sighs through her nose before moving on. “I know.” She murmurs. I suspiciously follow her, wondering if going to the storm clouds was really the best option, or if she had something in mind. Nonetheless I silently follow her through the brush.

At last we’ve made it to the clouds, but nothing looks familiar now. The entire arena surrounding the cornucopia has changed. I can barely make out what used to be what, but it looks like the big bowl in which we had to climb out of at the beginning has grown a hundred feet or so. It now resembles a massive boiling pot, with smoke coming out of the center. Inside the dip there is a huge, black tower, blue speckles glinting off wherever light reflects. I’m not quite sure what it’s made of, but it looks super incredible, like something right out of a book.

  “Uh, Tay...” I stutter as a massive bolt of lightning strikes, and lava spurts up like a geyser from the bowl.

  “I know.” She murmurs in response. Pretty soon thunder resounds above us, and I feel the sensation of terror overwhelming me...pretty soon I’ll start hyperventilating. Tay bumps me with her shoulder, having to bend down on account of my height, which is the equivalent of her grasping my hand to comfort me. I smile up at her, and we start walking.

   After we’d spent almost the whole morning scaling the walls surrounding the lava pit, we spent the hour of noon sitting at the top resting. Our breath and heartbeats were in sync, the both of us thoroughly exhausted. “Hey Aug, don’t we have some of those crackers left that we got from our sponsors?” She asked after a little while. I nodded, taking my backpack to sift through the contents. “I think so.” I breathed. At last my fingers wrapped around the tiny pouch, and pulled out the oh-so-precious items. We both frowned at the crumpled, crushed state they were in from our travels, but soon shrugged it off and began to dig in to our crummy meal.

    “Tay do you think...” I trailed off, wondering if my thoughts would be too ridiculous to share.

   “Yeah?” Tay answered, chewing through her crumbs. I smiled, who am I kidding, this is Tay we’re tlking about. I can tell her anything.

   “Do you think they will let us both live? If Coriolanus dies, then we’re left, we could just refuse to kill each other.” I pondered. Tay sighed, shifting her feet around to a more comfortable position.

    “I doubt it. If we refused to kill each other than the Gamemaker’s would just pick a favorite and kill the other one off, whether it be by mutation or otherwise.” She lowered her head, and I did the same.

    “Yeah I guess.” I thought a moment, dwelling on the past and all the time I’d spent with my now torn alliance. Kaleb was great, and I miss him so much....I recalled all the fun times we’d had together, not just the bad things like struggling to survive, or being chased by other tributes, or even being tortured by a psychopath. I remembered laughing with each other, playing truth or dare, man that was a night. Joking, foraging together, we had each other’s backs. Back in training days, our mentors had us watch previous games videos. And in all the stuff I’d watched, which was a lot, I don’t think I saw a closer alliance than us. We were more than mere partners only working together to ensure survival and win a game, we weren’t just in it to chase down and kill as many tributes as we could before turning on each other, we stuck together not only out of necessity but because we saw something in each other that we liked. We became more than partners, more than allies, we became friends. I think back, and even Keiko fit well with us, even if she were ours only a short time before her death. She was wonderful, and we were all a family, just like I always wanted. Back home, back in the orphanage, everyone wanted a family. All the kids had this picture in their minds of what it would be like; they had a mom, a dad, maybe some had it in their minds that they might have siblings. They had a pet, dog or cat, or both. There were three square meals a day, no one starved, they had clothes on their backs and went to school like all the other kids. It was great, believe me. Even I had a picture in my head of a perfect family. But being here, being in the arena with my new friends, they showed me what a real family was. You know, it was not just a roof over your head, clothes on your back and a meal settling in your stomach. It was working hard together, knowing each other, surviving together. Having a family meant making sacrifices, it meant looking out for each other, never abandoning each other in a bad situation, it meant sticking together no matter what. If we didn’t have a roof over our heads to keep the rain off, we didn’t care, because we had each other to keep ourselves warm. If there was not enough food to go around we made due, splitting it up with each other even if that meant all of us only got a tiny scrap. So no, we had no mom, no dad, no home, no food. But we had each other, and that is all that matters.

     “I love you Tay, no matter what.” I smiled, her smile playing back. She giggled and leaned over to push me. For an armless girl she sure was strong.

     “Whatever Mr. Mushy, now gimme some crackers!” She ordered, opening her mouth for me to feed her. I laughed hysterically and scooped some into my hand, placing it in her mouth carefully. She bit down, almost capturing my fingers between her teeth. I pulled back and yelped, giggling again with her. If neither of us make it out alive, I sure as hell would’ve been glad for the time I did have with Taystarian Gray. We were the last of our alliance, and so knew what the other was feeling. It sort of helped us with comforting each other, in a way.

    “Okay, little boy. We’ve got a tower to get to.” She stood up, shaking to get the crumbs off her lap, and waited for me to stand as well. “Need a hand?” She joked as I still sat there. I grinned and stood, brushing the crumbs off with my hands, and grabbing my backpack.

     “After you,” I bowed and stretched out an arm in a wide arch. She nodded and stepped out onto some rocks near the rail-less bridge we were about to cross. We both would prefer safer travel, but there weren’t exactly any other options.

   Tay lead the way, ever so carefully across the thin, rickety bridge. Occasionally a lightning bolt would strike more lava geysers, and we’d stand still as the bridge shook a little bit. I held Tay steady whilst also trying to keep my own balance, our system seemed to work fine, for now.

     Pretty soon we were almost to the tower, only fifteen feet to go. “We’ve got this Aug, we’re almost-” She suddenly slipped, her foot catching on a broken board and she fell down. I yelled and hid my eyes, catching the sound of splashing below. I shivered on the spot, quaking with tremors. My eyes remained sealed shut, unable to face what had just happened. Tay, my last ally, just fell to her death. A hundred or so feet below where lava boiled rapidly. Tears escaped my clenched eyelids, and sobs slipped from my lips. Maybe I should just fall too...

   “Phew, that was a close one. Let’s keep moving.” I heard Tay’s voice and snapped my eyes open. Impossible – she stood right in front of me, eyes watching mine, a confused look on her face. I was in shock, recalling the unmistakable splash down below.

    “You Ok? Look like you seen a ghost.” She commented. I was not seeing things, she was right here, sarcasm and all. “How did you-” I breathed, gesturing to the lava and looking below. “But I heard...I heard you hit the lava.” I could barely stand myself, still in shock and utterly confused. She leaned and looked down, noting the unsettled state of the lava below.

    “That was my backpack. There go our water bottles and snacks.” She pouted. I let out a deep sigh of relief, stepping forward and wrapping my arms around her thin waist. The sudden movement caused the bridge to sway, and my partner to get upset. “Okay okay! Enough, or you’ll make us both fall to our deaths and the psycho will win.” She complained. I let go and stood back, smiling like hell because I was so thankful she hadn’t died. I knew it was coming, eventually, but I didn’t want it to happen so soon.

    She lead the way in through the tower doors, which revealed a grand staircase straight ahead, floors aglow with pulsing blow lights. As we entered we gasped, oo’ed and aw’ed. Everything was so beautiful and so rich, like nothing we’d ever seen. Even the luxurious Capitol could not compare.

    Tay stepped in front of me, then turning to face me with a sad expression. “What?” I asked worriedly. I was only twelve but I knew when something was wrong, and now something definitely was.

    “Aug, now is the time where we split up.” I shook my head rapidly, about to protest but she spoke above me. “I know it’s going to be hard, but honey listen, our alliance is pretty much broken up. And we all wanted you to win. I know that eventually I’m going to die, and I really don’t want you to see that, so, we have to split up.” Tears sprung to my eyes, stinging my cheeks as they toppled down.

   “No, hey, don’t cry for me.” She breathed a laugh, trying to lighten the mood. But I could never just walk away from her, just leave. Like with Angel, I wanted to be there to hold her hand when she died. IF she died.

   “If I had hands I’d wipe your tears away.” We both couldn’t help but chuckle. But then things were back to doom and despair as I grasped her longer nub, not wanting her to go. “Please don’t leave me.” I murmured, giving that adorable pouty-face I knew worked on a lot of women. She shook her head and chuckled through a break in her voice.

    “August, I have to.” She argued.

  I shook my head, gripping tighter. “No. Please, don’t leave me alone! Don’t abandon me!” I started to raise my voice, prepared for a full-on debate. She looked so pained to have to do this, but she was stubborn and not willing to give up her ways. I’m sure we would’ve argued further, but footsteps sounded behind Tay and she whirled around at the sound of a voice.

    “Oh such sweet, sweet sorrow.” Coriolanus Adver treaded the halls before us, carrying some weapon he’d found and picked up from somewhere in the tower. Tay stood in front of me, stepping to her left to completely block my body with her legs and torso. I peeked out to watch, terror gripping me. This was not a person to mess with, he was a born killer.

   “Saying goodbye is always the hardest, isn’t it?” His taunting voice continued, long legs carrying him over huge strides ahead of us. He smirked, chuckling evilly. I gulped, heart beating faster. Tay glanced at me to be sure I was Ok.

   “You would know.” She retorted, earning a gasp from me. Corio just halted and glared at her. “You’ve had to say goodbye to so many people, haven’t you.” She said rhetorically. I wondered what she could be getting at, but didn’t dare speak even if I could.

   “Yes, but at least I still have all four limbs.” I wanted to step out and call him on it, to defend my one friend left. But the sword hidden partially behind his leg, gripped tightly by his hand told me to stay put. Besides, Tay could handle herself. And if all else failed we could always run.

   Back to seriousness. Corio started walking again, almost circling us like a devil his prey. “So what’s it going to be, surrender, or die painfully?” The psycho warned. I gulped again, breath drawing in sharper. I could’ve sworn I heard Tay whisper something, but it was just my imagination I guess. Corio kept walking, back and forth, back and forth before us. Tay glanced at me, muttering under her breath.

   “August, run.” She was saying. I shook my head, hiding my words behind her protective shield. “No, I won’t leave you.” I replied. She scoffed quietly, Corio still seemed unaware of our conversation. “Just run.” She ordered harshly. I hesitated, unsure what to do, glancing beside me at my options. There was a corridor to the right leading to another room. Corio blocked the stairs straight ahead, and behind him a little bit, kitty-corner to the stairs there was the room he came from. I readied myself to run, expecting Tay would be right behind me.

    Suddenly it was all happening too fast; Tay launched herself at Corio, who spun his sword ready to fight, while I dashed to the room on my right instinctively. I heard cries of anger from Corio and screams from Tay as I entered the room. I stopped; I knew I shouldn’t look back, just keep going. But she just kept screaming....I picked up my running speed, trying to hold back tears but failing. All I knew was to keep running; through room after room. I had no idea if she was dead or alive back there; I just abandoned her and couldn’t bring myself to go back. I was running, just like I always wanted to. Back home I was a coward, unable to leave the torture there. Here I was a coward, always running from the ones I loved most. I ran when Corio killed Kaleb, I ran when Keiko died, to a new location my alliance deemed safe. I was a runner, I was a coward.

    Tears blurred my vision and I had to slow, coming to a stop only to fall on my knees. I’d run from Angel, who was dying, when they called me up for the games. “I am so sorry Angel...” I murmured, teary-eyed and sobbing like a baby. “I’m so sorry.” I held my face and cried, unable to go on, unable to run from the crazy person whom I knew was after me now. I just sat in the blue room, a speck covering the floor. I wanted out, now. I wanted this to be over, but I knew for that to be real, two people had to die. So far I’d managed not to kill anyone, but that was about to change.

    A panting being stumbled into the room behind me. Somewhere I knew it wasn’t Tay, but I sincerely hoped. But then part of me hoped it wasn’t; because that meant I had to kill her, not the psycho.

    “Stopped for a breather?” Coriolanus’ voice eerily sought me out, still panting from his adrenaline rush. Anger took over my face, the burning tears now fading away. I uncovered my face but refused to look at him. If he were going to kill me, he better do it now.

    “W-where’s Tay?” I questioned, although I already knew the answer. I guess I just needed confirmation to believe it was true. My heart clung to the slight possibility that she was still alive and kicking.

   His menacing laugh filled the room and echoed, sending chills down my spine. “She’s dead of course. You don’t think I’d ever lose a fight, do you?” He came closer and I leaned forward, stomach resting on my folded knees. New tears burst through my eyes, sobs rattling my core. My heart finally seemed to accept the loss, pounding slower and slower as if expecting me to die. I jerked my head around to see Corio standing mere inches from me. I could’ve been dead ten times over, but he just stood there with his sword.

    “Get up.” He ordered. I was never one to disobey orders, not even from someone I hated. I stood and tremors rolled down me from head to toe. His silver eyes bore into mine like nails driven right through a board. We just stood momentarily.

    Then he handed me a sword, the most unusual thing he could’ve done. He swished his, taking a fighting stance. “For this I’d like a fair fight.” He deadpanned, eyes still cold and sharp as ever.

    “But it’s not a fair fight, you’re bigger than me, and stronger.” I pointed out desperately. “And I don’t know how to sword fight.” I added.

   He chuckled, scaring me half to death. “You mean ole Kaleb never taught you? And here I thought I wasn’t his only friend.” At the mention of Kaleb, and the utter disrespect in his tone,  I prepared a stance I remembered seeing Kaleb take on more than one occasion, posing my sword the way I knew he would.

   “Bring it on.” I challenged, but I knew I’d be the one dying. Only now it didn’t matter. Because if there was an afterlife, I’d be seeing it with all of my friends; with Kaleb, with Keiko, Angel, and now Tay. If that was all I had to look forward to, then I was ready.

    Immediately our duel began; Corio stepped forward and I jumped back. He missed his first strike, swinging at me again and again. Every time I managed to jump out of the way, my small size and agile movements coming in very handy.

     As we moved side by side, our steps fluid like water, I began hearing strange noises to my right. My ear tingled and I stole a quick-as-lightning glance in that general direction; to my horror one of the magma wolves from outside had made his way in, coming through the door which I would’ve gone out through had Corio not stopped me for the duel. My eyes went straight back to our fight, either hoping to end it soon or scare the wolf away. No such luck. As Corio and I swung our weapons at each other the wolf crept ever closer; a few more feet and he’d be in the midst of our battle. My heart was thumping through my ears, I could barely hear much else, save for the snarling of said wolf. The creature’s presence hardly seemed to faze my sociopathic opponent; he either didn’t care, or masked his fears extremely well. He lunged at me again with his sword, but I managed to roll out of the way. I let out a horrified scream as my eyes opened up to teeth snarling above me. I quickly rolled away from the wolf, stumbling to my feet again. This time Corio seemed to take notice as it was affecting our duel.

   The brunette psycho lunged at the wolf, screaming his head off in rage at the beast. I covered my ears, eyes tearing up. I really wanted Tay here to comfort me right now.

     The wolf, at first blinking and stepping back, was hardly afraid of Corio’s loud screams.  In one giant leap the extra-large, enhanced Capitol monster was on top of my enemy, snarling, snapping, and nipping at him. My initial thought was to run, leave him to the monster. But the way his terrifying silver eyes looked at me this time, told me somewhere deep down he wasn’t as psychotic as we all thought. He was human too, and I couldn’t just leave him to die...

    As it bit down on his arm, earning screams of pain, I leapt over to the scene and sliced through the beast  with my sword. It yelped for a few seconds before tumbling over and dying off. That’s when I turned to Corio and his bleeding arm to make sure he was Ok. He surprised me by jumping to his feet again and snatching up his sword. I eyed him curiously, but he just started smiling crazily, like he always did.

  “I just saved your life!” I shouted, confused as ever. He just showed me sanity, this is how he responds? I just saved the dudes life...”I know.” He replied menacingly, raising his sword. My eyes grew wide but I froze, forgetting that I held a sword as well, plus the ability to dodge last minute to confused him. He raised it higher, slowly, as if he wanted me to escape it. But I was still stuck in shock, unable to move. He began to swing down in slow motion....

    I sidestepped, suddenly snapping to attention, and made it behind him, taking a jab at slicing toward him. In utter astonishment I managed to somehow cut his back, just below his ribs. He spun around, hatred plastered on his face, and swung at me. Something seemed off, though. I ducked and jumped and twirled out of his way, not even allowed a chance to swing at him. But still something was off.

   Again I got behind him, speed and agility my friends there. I swung and cut his upper back, the previous concerns for him being human too now gone. A larger gash started spurting blood now. He cried out in pain and whirled around to catch me; but I was expecting that, and dodged his blow again. Then I realized; what was wrong, it was Corio. He wasn’t battling his finest. Any other day he could’ve handed me the sword and chopped me up in minutes; but today, he wasn’t even trying. Well, he was trying, but not to win. Maybe it  was on account of the injury taken to his arm, but the wolf bite wasn’t to his fighting arm. Then I saw it in his eyes a split second as we dodged each other again; he wasn’t trying his best, it wasn’t because of the injury.

     Our swords clashed several times, until one time he knocked my sword from my grasp and it flew across the room. We both stared in shock, like that wasn’t supposed to happen. I cowered back, knowing he was going to take the final strike and end me. I backed on the floor to the wall, where a potted plant sat next to me. I curled up beside it, hands gripping the tree trunk. But that’s when I realized I wasn’t gripping bark, but iron. I glanced up as Corio was swinging his sword down to end me and realized the tree was no tree, but a spear. In a split second a made the decision to save my own life; I pulled the potted spear down and held it in front of me, forcing my eyes closed and curling up tighter. Then I heard it; the squish of flesh meeting spear, the cracking of a rib cage, the piercing of the heart, and finally, the cringe of an impaled man. My eyes opened and I looked up to meet Corio’s eyes, glittering through the semi-darkness. Then something strange happened; his lips formed a smirk, he locked eyes with me and that look just told me – “Thank you.” He murmured, then hung his head as his last breath seeped out slowly. I sat very still for the longest time; my eyes were stuck looking at his dead body; it sunk in that I just killed him. That I just made my first kill, and then that I was alone. Completely and utterly alone. I wondered if they might forget about me here, if somehow everyone had stopped watching and no one knew I was still alive down here. Would they send a hovercraft to come get me? Would I ever see Angel again? Then it struck me; I was alive, I was going home. I was overwhelmed with joy for winning, grief for my losses, and horror for killing a man.

    I pushed with all the strength I had left to get Corio’s dead body away from me, knocking over the potted spear and jumping to my feet. I looked around, wondering how I’d contact anyone. Then I remembered they were all watching me. “Uh, hey! How do I get out?” I shouted to the ceiling. The loud ringing of the intercom somewhere above sounded out, before a voice huffed a reply. “Take the throne.”

   “What?” I didn’t understand, and frankly my brain was still warped with the images of death that no one should expect me to understand anything.

    “Take the throne.” The voice repeated. “In the very top of the tower, there is a throne. We want you to take it. You’re the Victor, are you not?” I stared in silence. I was the Victor. I, was the Victor. I just won the Hunger Games and I was twelve. I only killed once, and I still won the Hunger Games. I was injured, scraped up, and starving, but I was a winner; a survivor.

    I remembered the staircase in the first room, and worked my way back there. Of course that meant coming face-to-face with Tay’s dead body, which I didn’t think I could come to grips with. But I pushed forward, thoughts of home and warmth flooding me. I would no longer have to live in the orphanage, I’d be able to move to the Victor’s Village and live luxuriously, unlike all those bullies stuck in their one room warehouse. I’d be living the dream, Tay and Kaleb would be proud.

  I finally entered through the doorway leading to the big room; what met my eyes was not a pretty sight. Tay’s body lay sprawled on the floor in a pool of her own blood, but what really got me and made me turn away was the fact that she was headless. I didn’t even have time to spot the head, I turned away and vomited right behind the door. Tears leaked through my eyes but I kept the sobbing down.

   I slowly made my way back into the room, trying desperately to look anywhere but at her. Only I couldn’t; she was in the center of the room, practically the main focus. I let myself steal one glance her way. It tore me apart to see her body, just laying  there. She was once so alive, my friend, so fresh. Now...now what was she? I didn’t even know. People say death is hard; that dealing with the loss of a friend or family member is tragic, but can be overcome. I say those people had no idea what they were talking about. Sure when someone dies it’s tragic, but one minute seeing them protecting you, whispering things to you, blinking, breathing, moving, and then the next you actually see them lying there, bloody, knowing they’re dead and there’s nothing you can do. You expect at any moment for them to get up, laugh, or say something, but they don’t. They’re just lying there, still as stone. You expect to see their chest slowly rising and falling because that’s what you’ve always seen, but it’s not. You just see it still. You wonder if this is some sort of trick, if this is fake, but it’s not. You cry because your mind knows, but you stare and wait because your heart doesn’t. It doesn’t make any sense. You can think about death all you want, study it, know it, understand it. But when you’re faced with it everything changes; it makes no sense whatsoever. They’re gone, you feel that. But you see them right in front of you and you just...you don’t know what to do.

  I slowly made my way towards her, wanting her to sit up and talk to me. Wanting to tell her excitedly that I was the Victor, that I was going home to see Angel. I expected her to laugh, make a joke about her arms, and be excited with me. But she just sat there. I found her head, rolled a few feet away, flesh hanging off at the neck. I wanted to vomit again, but I held back. I saw her face; her eyes were open, mouth hanging open like it was when she let out her final screams. I stared. This was the very same girl who with the very same eyes looked around, and studied things. Who with the very same lips spoke words to comfort me at night, to make me laugh during the day, and to warn me of impending dangers. This was the girl who had become my best friend in the past month. Now she was silent; it was so unlike her to be silent.

   “Tay...” I trembled, bending down to a squatting position in front of her. I wanted her eyes to look through mine the way they always did; so see right through me, to bring out the best in me.

   “Tay please...look at me...” I whispered. A sickening feeling took over my stomach, not so much a nauseous feeling as it was something else. A homesickness for something I wanted my whole life; a family. Not just any family, her. I wanted Tay back. I wanted so bad for her to be alive again...why wasn’t she moving?

    “Please, Tay, say something. Look at me, please, wake up! Wake up Tay! Wake up!” I reached out to touch her, to wake her up, but her skin...it was cold. I pulled back sharply, afraid to touch her again. “Tay...” My face was soaked, along with my shirt. I refused to just give up, to let her go. There has to be an explanation...she can’t have just been completely eradicated like that. She couldn’t be gone, forever. Not forever, right?

   Sobs echoed the chambers. Loneliness clogged my heart and soul. I half expected Corio to come walking through the doorway I did, to be the same boy he always was, to taunt me with eerie sayings and scare the daylights out of me. I expected Kaleb to come in, angry and ready for revenge. But then I remembered the zombie-form he was in last time I saw him, and I shivered. I didn’t want Kaleb to walk in. I felt so totally alone it was unreal; then I felt the eerie presence of Corio behind me, coming in the door to kill me and Tay. I whipped around but no one stood. But I could feel them, right around the corner, right around every corner. They were there; everyone was, someone was. There was no such thing as totally alone, I could never be. There was someone here, someone hiding behind a wall or a door or any structure, just waiting for me to walk by and to jump out and grab me, to hurt me. I didn’t know what was behind every door, and that terrified me. What if I opened it and he was standing right there, ready to chop my own head off?

    Every emotion known to man washed over me all at once. I sat on the floor, because making myself smaller somehow made me slightly less afraid. Tay’s eyes stared at the wall right beside me. I looked where she looked, then back to her, breath rising higher and higher, heart racing faster and faster.

    Suddenly I was afraid of Tay; afraid of her body just sitting there, about to wake up headless. I was terrified that her head might turn to me and say something horrible, that I was a sitting duck here. Being alone utterly terrified me; but being with someone, anyone, who had the potential to hurt me or kill me just rattled my brain. I hurt, so much, I was terrified. My stomach felt sick, my heart felt like it was turning green with sickness. I was suddenly terrified of the world, of people, or being without people. I didn’t want to go back; I didn’t want to face the ones who did this to me, and all of them. I didn’t want Tay to wake up because that would be terrifying, she was gone, no way to return. I didn’t want Corio to walk through the door and scare me with his empty eyes and big smile; the recollection of his face just before he died – before I killed him – popped into my mind. That look, it was sadistic, it was on every face I ever remembered seeing. Tay had that look when I tried recalling what she looked like; Kaleb wore that face in the darkness, eyes bulging, lips painfully twisting up in a bloody smile like they’d been carved that way with a knife. Keiko wore that look when she went traipsing through the woods where she was killed by butterflies. Butterflies; they were everywhere in District Eight, what if when I go back I am killed by them too? What if I’m getting food one day and someone tries to steal it from me and kills me? What if wolves attack me in my sleep? What if my fire alerts any Careers watching? What if Tay comes back to life and hates me for leaving her to die? WHAT IF ANGEL IS DEAD?

  Darkness.

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/\/\/\/ beep.../\/\/ ...beep... /\/ ...beep...

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/\/\/\/\/...beep.../\/\/...beep.../\/\/\/...beep...

  My eyes slowly peel open; I flutter them shut, the intensity of the light above burning them.

/\/\/...beep.../\/\/\/...beep...

I glance to my right, eyes catching sight of a beeping heart monitor and a green line steadily going up, and down, up and down, up...

    “Where am I?” I gasp out, groaning as I try to sit up. Hands only push me back down, blurry faces with masks coming into view. “Shh, relax. You’re safe.” A woman whispers, almost heavenly.

  “Safe?” I ask gently. “Where?” I rub my eyes, trying to get things into perspective so everything isn’t so blurry. “Yes,” she answers, voice lispy and distant. “In the hospital.”

    “At the Capitol.” Another heavenly voice chimes in. I hear the beeping sound continue to my right, remembering it’s the heart monitor.

   “What happened?” I ask, the blurry yellow walls and white lights all mixing together in front of me. I feel very light-headed.

    “You were screaming,” woman number one recounts. “And you blacked out.” Woman number two adds. “But you won.” The first one says. I barely recall my last moments in the arena. I don’t remember my thoughts or my concerns, I only remember a blue room.

   “Congratulations.” The second woman places a hand to my sleeve. It’s a yellow sleeve, like the walls. It’s blurry, it’s fresh, and it’s clean. I haven’t seen a clean item in so long...

   “How did I – get out? I didn’t take the throne.” I recall vaguely someone in the sky telling me to take the throne and I can get out, but I don’t remember doing what he said. I can’t remember what happened.

  “You passed out.” Woman number two repeats. “When you didn’t wake to take the throne, we came and got you in a hurry.” Their faces start to clear up, I see woman number two is a doctor and has brown wispy hair. She’s wearing scrubs and a mask, along with a doctor’s cap. Then everything goes blurry again.

                                                               * * * *

  I wake up hours later feeling better than before. I can sit up now, and see things clearly. I still don’t remember anything from the time Tay and I entered the tower until I woke up in the hospital. I remember bits and pieces, but it’s jumbled and makes no sense. The doctors swarm around me, all congratulating me and talking to each other about the grand finale. I don’t hear most of their conversations, as they step away from me. I think something bad happened in the time that I don’t remember, and they’re all just trying to protect me from it. My stylist comes in later, congratulating me like everyone else, and hugging me. She goes on and on about the suspense of who the Victor would be, and then jumps from subjects. I listen and nod or give short answers, not really feeling up to conversation. I’m exhausted from everything, and just want to sleep. Then she brings up the interview, the one given to the Victor after they get out of the arena. I don’t want to be interviewed, to be on television again, to get up and talk about my feelings. I’ve seen many of the Victor interviews, and some of the questions have been brutal. I don’t want that. I’m tired, I want to go home, to see – Angel. I wonder if she’s still alive, if she’s waiting for me.

    I suddenly interrupt my stylist's rambling speech and ask her to get someone to find out about Angel for me. She nods in a sad way that scares me, and then leaves. Two days later they cleared me from the hospital and gave me that interview. It was slightly unbearable, but I managed. It was especially hard when they asked me questions I didn’t know the answer to, like the period of time that I recall nothing of, still. The doctors say they’re working on that, they’ll have my memory back soon, but honestly, I don’t know if that’s best.

  It’s been six days since I got out of the arena. I spent four days in the hospital, and two in the Capitol for Victor speeches and interviews. Finally, I’m going home. Nostalgia creeps over me as we drive along in the car. It’s only me, and the driver. We’ve come from the train station, and are now headed to the Victor’s Village. But that’s not where my heart is. First I need to find Angel.

    Back at the Capitol my mentors and escort wanted to show me the footage of my final moments in the arena, to jog my memory. But all I thought of were my fallen friends, and how I didn’t want to see them die again. Since I was the Victor I knew that meant somewhere along the lines Tay had to die, and I really , really don’t want to see that.

    I leaned up to the driver, poking his shoulder. “Think we can make a stop at my old home? There’s someone I’d like to see.” I request hopefully. He nods, smiling in the mirror. “Sure thing, Mr. Rush.” He replies. I smile and sit back, unable to keep from smiling. If Angel is indeed alive and well, she’ll be thrilled to see me, and I her. I dare not even think if she were dead. The uncertainty kills me, however. But I’d lost too many, I can’t lose her. Not my little Angel.

  We come to a smooth stop in front of the rickety old warehouse, children in rags running to hide. They can’t help it, it’s habit. Anyone driving up in a fancy car means trouble for them. The driver gets out and opens my door. I step out and take in the sun and smell. I never really realized how much I’d missed this place, rickety old warehouse or not.

   Liam, my driver, escorts me into the building. Mai sits at the front counter, putting away her things, she must be just leaving. “Hey!” She squeals at the sight of me. I break into a smile and rush over to hug her.

   “August, you’re back! It’s so good to see you!” She holds me tight, loving me like her own child. The embrace reminds me of Tay, and how often we hugged. I quickly pull back, wanting to forget everything that ever happened in the arena. It was all a gory nightmare, I tell myself.

    “So, is she here?” I ask as Mai goes back to packing. Her smile completely drops from her face, eyes flicking to me and then anywhere but. I frown, not wanting to face the truth, not daring too. If Angel died without me...

   “I’m sorry August.” I barely hear her words as I begin racing toward the stairs. On the way up, frown dominating my lips, I crash into Rufus and Farus. This time it’s not me who cowers and runs, but them. They stare at me as if I were a ghost or a monster. Their eyes flicker to each other and then gulp. I must have killed someone; in the time I don’t remember, I must have, and now they think I’m a killer. They’re afraid of me. Quickly they slip by me and run away, not uttering a word until out of range. I turn back slowly, realization pouring over me. The games had not only changed me, but showed the world the monster hidden inside me. No one would be able to look at me the same, not even Angel. Angel. I hurried up the stairs, leaving Liam behind.

    As soon as I’d reached the large room full of cots that I used to share with all these orphans, the laughter stopped. The pillow fights ceased, the smiles and giggles vanished, the room was silent. Everyone stared, not at me because they were afraid to do that, but at each other, the floor, anything. As I walked past them all, they cringed, shivered, and looked away. Everyone had completely shut me out before, ignored my existence. But now everyone knew who I was, and what I’d done. I could only pray that Angel thought otherwise.

  Past all the younger children silently gawking at me, I approached a door, and adjusted my suit. I thought of knocking, but this was Angel. I carefully wrapped my fingers around the door, slowly turning it to the left with a click, click, click. On creaking hinges it swung inward, my head poking in through the crack it made. My eyes slowly scanned the room which housed her bed, all the pink things greeting me. Slowly I opened it ever wider, still unable to tell whether the bed was occupied by her graceful presence. I peeked in, eyes widening with anticipation. “Angel?” I spoke.