A/n: Last Chapter my friends. It's been an emotional ride so far hasn't it. I hope u enjoy and thank u for reading.

Imma be that person lol check my kpop drawing insta @trulii_me

Taehyung's POV

Pain.

The feeling that possessed me. It was painful.

That day.

Something felt so off about that day.

Like the last domino had fallen.

The final chapter flipped.

I remember it clearly; The dreadful emotion that surrounded me that night time when my brain was fuzzy from exhaustion.

A tiredness that could make me forget by now.

Yet the memory is still clear in my mind.

Jimin.

I woke up with his name in my throat.

I remember my hand flying to my necklace.

Desperate.

How confused I was, when the name that was the source of my happy dreams, made me feel like I had a nightmare in that darkness. The dim sky gazed upon me through the window in pity.

The clouds started crying. I heard them bawl.

That night.

It felt like a part of me had broke off, leaving something incomplete. Like something fragile fell, and it just clicked in my mind that it will shatter if it touches the floor.

Something broke that day, and I knew as much as I didn't.

Have you ever woken up, and had a feeling like that. Like something just didn't feel right in the world.

That you could bet your life that everything wasn't okay, but you had no clue why you felt that way.

Because I swear that specific day,

I felt the air shift that night.
I saw the sky falter in that moment.
My heat ached that very second.

And my heavy tears knew why.

The tears I shedded like the rain, had knowledge of the exact reason; it knew the secret, but couldn't tell me, leaving my mind clueless.

It was like my soul knew, and it weeped so much its tear's materialised, but my physical form was left in the dark. It didn't know what caused my body to react that way.

Then I remembered I'd seen this moment  happen for another.

For my mother, when Jimin smashed something to save me, I saw something that wasn't physical. Almost like her soul got stabbed, and the most valuable thing in her eyes got stolen away.

It's the same moment. Like mother like son.

The object in my mind couldn't handle its impact with the floor, and what I valued dearly shattered into pieces.

I remember. The immense pain I felt; the tragic sobs that I couldn't control,

that day 2 Months ago,

When I heard a car screech as I called his name.

—-

Alone.

That was my official status at the time.

I stayed in that house; alone, waiting for his return.

Like a pet looking out the window each and every day, waiting for its owner to come back.

That was me. Just waiting.

Day after day usually passing in silence, no movement except my own in that cabin.

I had no one.

But that was okay.

I thought, once he returned, I would gain my companion again, so I was fine being alone, because he would come back to me.

I convinced myself it'll be worth it in the end.

But there was an emotion I still couldn't fully control. One I couldn't easily persuade. There was days that the feeling would soak into the core of my bones, screwing with my brain to try and mess with me.

It was loneliness, and it felt like poison to me.

Slowly, it was killing me.

My mind would go to dark places; despair luring me deeper in.

But my antidote was always his messages that were left; dust never having a chance to collect on top because I would constantly check them.

So observantly I would study them; how much pressure he put on the pencil, every curve in every letter, the meaning behind each word carefully analysed.

Then my heart would swell as "I love you" greeted me at the end of every letter, and a hopeful feeling would get me through the day.

There were times though, when his words weren't enough to satisfy me.

I'd remember certain days of the past unintentionally; remember how his voice turned husky, recall his touch all over my body, and bask in the chill his gaze once gave me.

Then a wave of heat would cloak my body, my legs would go weak, and an urge would take me.

Id yearn for his touch.

I'd start to ache.

And desperately, I wanted it, I needed his heat, his scent, his voice, but I couldn't have it.

So I'd change into some of his hoodies left in his closet, then lay in his bed.

Covered in his intoxicating scent; my eyes would always close, letting my hands wander to where it hurt the most, where the most tingling came from, and I'd start to imagine.

In those moment, euphoria always caressed my existence, the sensation so amazing as it flowed throughout my body.

And it always felt like he was there, touching me in all the right places.

The feeling of his breathing on my neck, warm yet chilly on my skin.

The touch of his cold hands grazing my skin, sending the right shock to a place where all the sensation seemed to pile up.

My teeth gripping my bottom lip to hold in the sounds, but the idea of his teeth teasing my lip writing over the truth.

Sweat covering my entire body, making everything feel so hot.

Then he would tease me, rub me where the pain had build up, and I would rub against him, in need of some friction to get me the the climax.

His name would always leave my mouth; no other word forming except his name. And he'd smirk into my skin, loving how weak and needy I became for him.

How good he made me feel.

I'd always think about going farther than I've actually went with him. Then my back would arch from the sensational climax, everything feeling like it's squeezed out of me.

Like the indescribable ecstasy I felt was because of him. And I'll love it, buzzing as my brain stayed fuzzy with static.

But then I would lay there for some time after the high, after the pain finally turned into pleasure, and I'll curl up into a ball, always regretting what I just did.

My hand would be left sticky, and I'd feel ashamed, telling myself that I wouldn't do it again.

But I kept doing it.

So as the days continued on, these things would always bring me back from the brink of going mad with want, and I'd try to ignore the tinge of sadness and regret I felt.

Anything related to him, continued to blind me from how bad the situation was becoming.

I thought it was okay when the lights permantly turned off, because I would just use the sun as a light source.

I brushed off the fact that the water stopped running, deciding that I'll just go and bathe in the lake he showed me.

The heater refusing to give me warmth didn't faze me, because I'd just wrap myself in more blanket when I slept, and even when I was on my last loaf of bread,

I told myself I'd just starve. 

My mind thought that everything was all alright, because If I continued to wait, he'll return to me.

Then 1 month ago,

the movers came.

And my mind couldn't convince me anymore.

When they saw me, the look they gave me caused me to see that something wasn't right.

I couldn't make out human faces for some reason, but confusion with pity still met my eyes, and my stomach started to churn.

Carefully they tried to talk to me, but I was deaf to their voices as I watched all the stuff get carried away. And I would remember, recall things that for some reason I couldn't remember before.

Like a moving picture, I saw Jimin interacting with everything they were carrying out, and something cracked inside me. It was like I was asleep and finally woke up. That's when I knew.

Everything wasn't okay anymore.

Because I realised that I couldn't stay.

The misery of abandonment held me in its brutal grip, chocking me on my knees as I gagged on it. Then I felt the faceless identities hands loom towards me, panic blocking my vision, and the next thing I know, I'm running.

I ran out of that house and away from them. Struggling through the high snow as it also came down brutally on me, I kept going, away from that sudden pain that was suffocating.

I ran and ran until I couldn't anymore.

And I let myself collapse, let the cold bite me with its harsh touch, let it tear into me.

I laid there.

My mind going blank as I felt my body stop functioning.

—-

Numb.

At first,

my body felt nothing, my ears only heard white noise, and my sight drowned in white.

Nothing went through my mind at the time, because it didn't know where to start.

Everything seemed numb.

It was only later did I realise where I was, and that I notice that there was eyes on me. Black faces with bright eyes that pierced into me, waiting and watching.

Then I heard the beeps, the timed beat of something that was my very own.

My heart.

I was in the hospital.

After figuring that out, the bed started bending for me to see things other than the ceiling, and I started hearing noises.

Muffled voices coming from faceless identities, and I couldn't convince my brain to translate.

So I laid there, not really thinking about anything.

"Kim Taehyung."

The shock kicked in, how my name was said so clear, distinct against jabbering in the back, and for the first time since I woke up, I wondered why.

Then I realised, it was a voice I've heard before.

So I turned to the owner of that voice, no feeling really taking me when I saw them.

She had a pleased smile across her face, her pet bunny still glued in her arms like I remembered, but it had bandages wrapped around it this time.

I didn't question why that was. I didn't wonder why she was here, so I just accepted the facts.

The girl that I recognised, she hasn't changed much from the first time I saw her at my mum's parent's house.

So all I did was stare as she got closer, her smile never leaving her face.

Then she said to me, her voice full over pleasure

"The first time we met I didn't introduce myself."

And as she bowed, her pigtails swayed with the movement, and I watch it glide.

Her face was clear to me compared to everyone else, and with a joyful look, she opens her mouth again to speak.

"My name is Jeon Jungkook."

—-

3 minutes ago, I woke up, and after Jungkook told everything I needed to know, my first thought is,

I give up.

There was no hesitation in my decision.

It all seemed to late.

Everything just timed out on us.

I never knew me waiting for him would have a time limit, but now I know that the clock was ticking impatiently.

I haven't seen him in 3 months. Haven't even heard from him.

His notes can only make me be strong for so long, holding onto a promise that was never fulfilled.

It just didn't work out.

I was strangely determined to stay their even till I starved to death, but the movers made reality hit me.

How the house was sold to somebody else, it made me wake up.

Now it was January, compared to the movers that came in the beginning of December.

The new year has snatched his chance to gain me back. I don't blame him, I'm stupid to expect a good life for myself, but disappointed still killed me.

Jimin didn't keep his promise.

To celebrate my birthday.

To return to me.

To be my home.

To love me.

He would not come back, and some part of me knew that all along.

I feel dead.

Jungkook quietly continued to smile at me, but I couldn't return it.

I felt my neck, grabbing my necklace in my grip, but I didn't know what I was wishing for anymore.

It was like a dreadful tumour that weighed heavy on my heart as I learned.

I'm left once again, homeless and unloved.

My mind, body and soul finally all broke, and I just felt like something hollow.

Stuck out in the cold,

I realised that I was forgotten,

Abandoned.

Almost like a dream that my mind conjured up 

That one summer seized to exist .