Chapter 31: Painful memories

''Why you cheated me khushi? How could you snatch my boyfriend..don't you have a shame doing that before marriage..chee..'' Khushi was too numb to react.

''I am ashamed calling you my friend..My parents always told me not to befriend with you but i never heard them..I share all my happiness, sorrow..everything with you. What a mind blowing price you gave to your best friend..hats off to you..'' She clapped her hands.

''Lavanya please believe me..This baby is Arnavji's blood..My mistake is only that i fall in love with him'' A hard slap landed on her face making her to fall down. Immediately, Khushi grabbed the table in order to support herself from falling down.

''Don't you dare take my fiancee name from your mouth..he is only mine did you understand. I never thought in any wildest dream you would play such a sick game to separate us. Why you back-stabbed me, khushi..??'' She yelled loosing her self control and grab her shoulder.

''No this is not true..I never wanted to deceive you. Arnav played with my heart and body and this baby is the symbol of hi-'' She didn't let her complete shouting at her, shunning her off.

''Just shut your bloody mouth..this baby can never be Asr's..he only love me so stop putting blame on him..It was you who always run behind him and now trying to brainwash my mind you think i am a fool to believe your lies..how many times I need to remind you he is my love..for god sake stop interfering in my personal life..spare us and let us spend our life together peacefully..''

Khushi slowly moved from her place and went to hold her hand. Angrily, she shrugged her hand and look away getting highly agitated.

''Don't touch me with your ugly hands..You are a bloody cheater..''

''Believe me Lavanya..i hadn't done anything..he slept with me faking his love..'' Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks.

''Why should I believe you? Do you have any proof..?''

''You still need proof..you think my pregnancy is a LIE. I would never lie about father of my baby, it was him. He ruined my entire life and the same he is doing with you..'' She placed her hand on her belly, trying to brake her blind faith on him.

''Arnav is a father of my child..If you want I will make DNA test done to prove my innocence but I will not let him to use you like he did with me..''

''No!!!!!! You are lying!'' She step backward closing her ears.

''Open your eyes and see the reality..he can never been loyal with any girl..it was his hobby to use girls and throw them out..''

''Shut up khushi! Not a word against Asr..'' She shook her head in denial.

''Truth is bitter Lavanya..Don't commit the same mistake which i already done..He would also ruin you..'' She went close to Lavanya but she push khushi away making her to fall down on the ground against her stomach. Blood started to ooze from her stomach making her to scream in pain.

''I will never forgive you..You cheated me Khushi.. God will never forgive you..you will pay for your sins and same goes to your illegitimate child..''

''Mumma..''

''My baby..'' She grab her stomach possessively.

Khushi woke up startled at the nightmare she just experienced. Sweat was dripping at the side of her face. Tears spilled down her cheeks.

''My baby is not illegitimate..believe me Lavanya I didn't deceive you..'' She mumbled in between and cried her heart out hugging her knees closer to her heart. She throw everything on the ground feeling extremely vulnerable and distraught. No one is ready to believe her. What is her mistake in all that? Why everyone putting her responsible for the mistake she is not responsible? Why always a women has been blamed and accused when a man is equally mistaken.

Her only mistake she fall in love with a man deep from her heart and soul and trust him more than anything who is not worthy to be loved. Was it was her fault that he played with her feelings and ripped her dignity for his so called revenge? Was it was her fault she allow him to get so close to her? Was it was her fault she worship him as her god but for him, she was just a useless article? Was it was her fault she consider him as her husband but for him, she was only his mistress? Was it was her fault he grow his lustful seeds in her and left her after using her? What is her fault that she got pregnant out of his lust? Why everyone disgrace her character? Firstly her parents left her, her honor, her reputation everything gone and now if Lavanya came to know what she has done, she will also hate her. She don't want to loose her best friend as well. Why god always snatching the person she loved so dearly? Why she cannot live a normal life with her loved ones? Why??

Pain and frustration was making her hell mad. She look at the wall clock which was showing 3 AM. She went straight to the bathroom to splash fresh water on her face.

Thousands of vulnerable thoughts coming to her mind. What if this dream come true? She shake her head. But one day she will know about her pregnancy. How she will face her friend? She will be completely broke down.

''I am sorry Lavanya..i am really sorry..i will never forgive myself for ruining your happiness..You are right I am a back stabber, I snatch your boyfriend, a characterless women who ruin her best friend life which is not yet started. I don't deserve to be lived..'' She wanted to kill herself.

''Why I let that man so close to me even by knowing he is so precious to you. THAT ONE MISTAKE spoiled so many lives..'' The guilt of ruining her best friend's happiness killing her by every passing second. She cannot met her eyes and everything is happening because of one person.

~~~

A rain was dripping drenching the entire city. Khushi was standing near the window with her eyes looking outside the glass window where she actually see a couple under the umbrella, smiling, laughing and enjoying the first rain of Delhi. Love were clearly reflecting in their eyes as they were so lost into each other. She closed her eyes briefly remembering the times she worship this pure feelings of love and thought she got the most lovable person as her life partner. She thought she is so lucky to have him but in reality she was the most unluckiest person to get trapped in his love. Everything is FAKE. This Love meant nothing to her. She hate this four letter word L-O-V-E. It become a cursed to her.

Tears prick her right eye letting her to drown in those beautiful memories she spend with the biggest Casanova in London.

*Flashback*

Khushi was jumping like a small kid while looking outside the window of the car. Salty droplets touching her face and palms making her to giggle enthusiastically. Her heart was arching to go out and enjoy the beauty of rain but the person sitting next to her was too busy to make the calls, gripped her hand possessively, knowing well what creepy plan is running in her cute brain.

Their car broke down in a vacant place upon that this crazy women giving him tough time and showing her tantrum. She made a face and try to struggle which made his grip stronger than before.

''Yah we needed that..Send the car we are near the garden..'' He was going to complete when he felt some wetness on his face.

''Khushi..'' He eyed her as she splash rainy droplets on his face.

''Ji..''She show her most innocent face like she don't know how water come inside his car.

''Arnavji, Do you know I love playing in rains very very much..''

''Hmm..'' He replied with his gaze fixed in his mobile.

''Hum apse baat kar rahe hain..'' (I am talking to you) She snatch his mobile annoyingly to grab his attention and rest her back on his chest.

''You are so unromantic..''

''Really..'' He trace his finger on her face.

'' Hume gudguli ho rahi hain..'' (I am feeling tikling sensation)

She is so cute, he wondered amused.

She giggled and push his hand off. While her head still laying on his chest, rubbing her cold nose.

''You know I love eating ice cream in this weather also..'' She said brushing his hand around her flat tummy. His gaze turn to look into her beautiful eyes.

''Baby from where I found ice cream here..'' He move her hair strands from her face and slammed his lips on her cheeks. Placing his hand on her cheeks he began coming toward her.

''But you can fulfill my first wish..'' She placed her palm on his lips in interruption and unlock the window. Before he could register her words, she jumped out of the car showing her tongue and started to run here and there like a naughty kid.

''Khushi wait..'' She was running sheepishly so that he won't be able to catch her.

''Are you nuts..You will fall sick..'' He chase her but then what he saw melted his heart in awestruck. She look up at the sky with her arms open enjoying the rain. Her entire posture were drenched from head to toe giving him clear view of her private parts. He was completely hypnotized by her. The spark on those innocent eyes, her rosy cheeks and her breath taking smile attracting him more and more toward her. He felt a sudden urge to grab this beauty. She jumped in a small well and grinned amazingly.

''Careful..'' He grabbed her arms from falling down and she directly landed into his irresistible arms. Their eyes met and something strong happened.

''You also play with me please..'' She said slowly looking into his intense eyes.

''I only love one game to play..'' Taking her hand, he kissed it seductively. Her cheeks boiled with shyness.

''Really?'' He nodded with his eyes turning dark with desire.

''Well its too bad because I am not giving it..'' She pushed her tongue out. Seeing his pray run off he went after her. He called her but she refused. She began running and dancing in the rain crazily.

Khushi ran away seeing him coming closer but wind blew her dupatta away from her covered chest. With slow determine steps, Arnav walk near her and his eyes looking at her gorgeous cleavage. She shyly cover it again and turned. He moved toward her and cupped her face kissing her eyes, cheeks, nose, chin and then capture her lips hungrily. She held onto her kameez.

''Arnavji please..'' She tilted her head to stop his kisses. He smoothed her wet hairs and she look back into his eyes breathless. Both look at each other with love and passion. He buried his head to kiss her neck and ran down her throat toward her cleavage. She close her eyes tightly. He sucked them harder making her to grab his collar nervously.

Within a second, she been scooped into his arms toward his SUV.

''Hume aur bhegna hain..'' (I want to play more) She wriggle her legs and hands.

''Shut up..'' On reaching, he dumped her on the backside and lock the door from inside like an desperate lion. She try to move up but her both hands been pinned aggressively pressing her lower body against his. He was staring her like he is going to eat her alive.

''Chodiye hame..yeh aap kya rahe hain? (Leave me..what are you doing) She went breathless feelings his hot lips against her ears. He gaze a gentle squeeze letting a loud moan to escape from her mouth.

''Showing you how an unromantic man turn into romantic..'' He started to place love bites on her skin. She closed her eyes again.

''Why you not listening to me..'' His mouth giving her small kisses on her neck. Their bodies moulded against each other. She was feeling dizzy.

''Ap jab hume iss tarha chute hain hame kuch kuch hota hain..'' (Whenever you touch me like that i feel an unknown sensation..'' She cover her face with her palms.

''You are so innocent khushi..'' He pinch her cheeks and kissed her nose. He suck the droplets from her exposed skin and lean down to claim her assets.

''No please No..'' Before she could make any move to stop his evil intention, he remove her top along with the hook of her bra to reach his target. He kissed all over her body making her completely nude. Her eyes popped out in astonishment. Sometimes she felt he only love her body not this heart of hers. The way every now and then they were getting intimate and he was making love to her, she felt an unknown fear of loosing him.

Even though she trust him wholeheartedly but doing all this before marriage was completely against her moral values. She definitely not wanted anything bad to happen in near future which she would regret later.

''Arnavji this is not right..we need to stop..'' She halted his act placing her hand on his chest. She crossed her arms to cover her upper body.

''Oh come on khushi, this is not first time we are doing it..'' He grabbed her hands behind her waist and once again hover upon her, nibbling her skin.

''But Arnavji we are not married and I don't feel comfortable doing all this without marriage..let's get married first after that we-'' He stop kissing her hearing that and lifted his head angrily.

''So you are doubting on my love..you think I am behind your body and playing with your feelings and will dump you after satisfying my needs..'' With greeted teeth, he threw her on other side and got up to wear his clothes. He was about to move when in a sudden she hugged him from behind.

''No Arnavji I didn't mean that..I trust you more than anything..if I doesn't i will never go extreme in our relationship..You are my life..'' He smirked evilly.

''But Sometime I get scared, I haven't been with any man and this is all very new to me..''

''This girl is such a pain..'' He rolled his eyes. She make him turn and cupped his face.

''Arnavji please say something..don't get angry with me..I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you..You can do anything with me it was your right..hum dil se apko apna pati mante hain..'' (I consider you my husband) She pull him into a tight hug and cry on his shoulder.

''Poor girl, it is so easy to make you fool..'' She lifted her head with teary eyes and he made a straight face.

''You love me haina?'' He nodded and kissed her eyes.

''Don't ever think I am using your body I could have got the physical love from any random girl but i will never do that because that was my past and you are very special to me, khushi. I wanted to have you in every senses and expected the same from you..''

''I know you will never ditch me because my Arnavji love me, only me. You can never imagine in your dream to cheat me..it was just we are getting so much involve physically so I..'' She look down expressing her inner turmoil.

''If you are not comfortable I will not touch you again..'' He spoke raising her chin.

''No Arnavji I am yours waise bhi we are going to marry very soon haina..''

''Ofcourse..'' She hugged him tightly in submission and he entered inside her with a hard force.

''I am sorry sweetheart to broke your beautiful dreams. Unfortunately I have no interest to marry a cheap girl like you. Why should I marry a girl whom I already used many times..I got my revenge and once I get bored of you, I will throw you out from my life..You are done for me..'' He gave an evil grin and push her body away from him and started to button up his shirt.

~~~

Khushi was working in the office when her mobile started ringing.

''How are you karan..'' A huge smile spread on her lips hearing his voice on other end.

''I have heard you are dating Arnav..It is true?''

''Yes..that very true and we are getting married after coming back..'' She blushed adoring the ring in her middle finger.

This news literally stabbed his heart. But more than his heart break, he was worried for his friend because he know what a playboy Asr is.

''Are you sure he love you?''

''What type of question is that. Ofcourse he love me otherwise we never get so close to each other..'' He closed his eyes tightly like someone stab him brutally.

''Khushi, don't get so involve with him so much, he is not worthy for your love. He used girls for his own advantage so be careful from him..''

''Stop it Karan..Arnavji is not like that..he is changed now..''

''Changed? Are you serious? He can never change. Person who don't believe in love or marriage and make fun of such bonds how suddenly get changed after moving to London. Did you ever thought why he always landed to rescue you when you are in trouble and now showing all gentleman type behavior. Who knows it was his plan to trap you?''

''What are you saying? This is not possible..'' His words was totally indigestible to bare. She felt her heart come out any moment.

''Because I have heard his talking with Lavanya. She even told me Asr going to announce their engagement after returning back..''

''What nonsense are you talking..'' She stood up all fire up.

''A Casanova like him will never changed..He is trapping you, khushi..Don't trust him, he don't deserve you..''

''Enough Karan! Please don't say anything bad about him. I will not tolerate this. You must have heard something wrong..he only love me and I trust him more than I trust you..''

''You will regret big time...Your trust going to break very badly and I have a fear the time you realize your mistake it would be too late to amend..''

Before she ask something more, her mobile been thrown on the floor.

Suddenly she found herself been pulled against the nearest wall. She didn't realize he was overhearing their conversation. Anger bubbling inside him knowing khushi talking with another guy.

''How many times I told you I don't like your friendship with other men..'' He shouted making her shriek.

''Arnavji he is just my friend..why you over reacting?''

''I am not over reacting..You are only mine and I hate your friendship with other guys..'' Saying this, he slammed her lips and kissed her lips furiously.

''You are not going to interact with him after that..is that clear?'' He said after leaving her swollen lips.

''But..'' He grabbed her cheeks within his palm and look into her eyes giving a deadly glare.

''Don't you dare to argue with me..''

''You are hurting me?'' She try struggle in his strong grip but he was getting hell mad. She can see a different kind of rage in them. She open her mouth to calm his ragged breathe but he halted her tongue by kissing her senselessly.

''You are only mine samjhi tum..'' He said arrogantly while she went lost in those words uttered by karan.

Does Arnavji really taking her love for granted? He ripped her clothes and make love to her in her cabin without caring about surrounding.

An unwanted thought troubling her mind whenever he get physical with her unwillingly.

''What i am thinking..Arnavji can never do this to me.'' She console herself and brought back to her senses hearing his voice.

''When i am making love to you, i want your attention only on me..'' She smiled and kissed him back. He interlock her hand with his to hammer deep inside her breaking her bangles. She shuddered.

''No this is not possible..he genuinely love me even though he never express his love directly..i can feel his love by the way he touches me, look at me and my heart knows my Arnavji only love me..he can never cheat me because his love is pure just like his heart..'' He kissed his forehead as soon as passion hit them brutally.

*Flashback end*

A lone tear rolled down from the corner of her eyes. She is a girl who always believe her heart and it proved to be main reason of her destruction and foolishness. She touch her baby bump with pain and agony.

''Why I didn't believe Karan..You always worn me to stay alert but i am so blind in his love didn't see his true color on time and let him to use me again and again. I am a biggest fool in this world to trust that bas****..I hate you Arnav Singh Raizada..i hate you with my whole heart..you spoil my entire life leaving me with nothing..Your cruel game made me an unwed mother. Your lust prove me an characterless women in front of entire society..'' She roughly wipe her tears and started to snatch her skin. Her entire body was burning as she still feel his awful touch everywhere. No matter how much she try but this pain would never going to fade away.

His cruel words still torturing her ears. She wasn't able to close her eyes as the moment spend with that man making her more disgust. She wanted to scream, cry or kill herself but unfortunately she couldn't. She was helpless. Because she is not alone..his small part is growing in her womb. This feeling of motherhood always making her remember his intimate touch, his betrayal, his painful words, his relationship with other women.

''Why you come to my life..i doesn't need you..You are his blood..go away..'' She punch her baby bump frustratingly.

At one side she wanted to shower all the love to her child and protect him from his monstrous father but other side she wanted to hate this unborn because this baby was his flesh, his own blood- the person who destroy her life. Many times the thought of removing this unwanted pregnancy came to her mind. But how she could she hurt this innocent soul when he has no fault into this. He was as innocent as her's. She cannot do anything other than punishing herself for committing this sin. She not only disgrace her parent's name but she betray her best friend too. She wasn't able to carry this grief anymore. She need to do something to let out this frustration. Her nail marks was causing her pain and bleeding her skin. Her baby crying inside.

''Are you mad..stop hurting yourself...'' Karan immediately ran inside to stop her stunts.

''You are pregnant Khushi, you are hurting your baby..''

''I don't want that bas**** child..'' She continue poking sharp nails on her skins and in between punch her stomach. She hissed but this pain is very less compared to one she was bearing currently. A strange numbness spread her mind and body. She couldn't register what karan was speaking with her.

''I hate his baby..It was the result of his lust..''

She was ripping her skin pushing karan off from stopping her hands and burst into crying uncontrollably. Karan himself on the verge of crying. Her condition making him very afraid.

''Calm down Khushi..sambhalo apne aapko..''

''This child is yours..your blood..'' He try to convince her but all in vain. She was getting out of control. He hurried his step and went to bring out injection. He inject her sedative before her depression skills affect her unborn.

''I want to die..kill me please..'' He took her into his embrace and console her. Her devastated state killing him.

''Don't hurt yourself it break me..your life is very important to me..I love you khushi, I love you very much..'' His words hit her ear drum. Suddenly dizziness took over her letting her to sank into unknown world which is far better than reality.

He thank his goodness that he able to reach home on time as he somehow guessed khushi would do something like that. The way Arnav beaten him it didn't took him time to realize he has done something drastic to hurt her. However, he directly went to reach home to check her. He had a clue Arnav's deeds going to affect her mind and heart drastically. And his biggest fear come into reality seeing her this condition. She reacted in a way he never imagined. Although she love her baby but the hatred for Arnav drew her toward the edge of insanity. After a long period of time, he have seen her so disheveled and broken. All because of him. Sigh!

~~~

Arnav had drove off aimlessly since hours. His mind wasn't able to rest in peace. He wanted to hear her voice, to talk with her, to take into his arms and to heal her wounds but didn't gather courage to face her after what had happened. The sight of her painful face coming in front of his eyes. Gaining some strength he went to meet her from back window but what he saw shaken his ground drastically. Khushi were all shattered, crying into karan's arms, trying to hurt her baby and punishing herself. It literally broke him apart. How much he had hurt this girl? He was feeling extremely horrible. On top of that the sight of his khushi into his arms boiled him in rage beyond limit and then his confession. He was going to kick him hard but something stopped him in middle.

Does khushi felt the same seeing me with Lavanya that night? How much painful to bear the person whom you love so dearly broke your heart. He started to realize the depth of her pain she was carrying within her heart since an year. Instead of consoling her, he abuse her love calling her prostitute when she confront with him. A tiny drop of tear come out from his painful eyes. He was feeling so ashamed of himself. How difficult it was to bear all this alone. Upon that she was pregnant! Why he damage her to this extend. Will she forgive me? Jubilantly his eyes went to her lifeless and dead soul.

''I know what I would see in her eyes, hatred only hatred..'' Then, karan's words echoing in his mind.

SHE DON'T NEED YOU BECAUSE SHE HAVE ME. IT WAS ME WHO SUPPORT HER WHEN YOU THROW HER OUT FROM YOUR LIFE..DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT SHE WENT THROUGH. SHE WAS LIVING BUT HER SOUL ALREADY DIED BECAUSE OF YOUR SO CALLED FAKE LOVE. YOU SPOIL HER ENTIRE LIFE AND NOW EXPECTING HER TO FORGIVE YOU AND LIVE WITH YOU NORMALLY. SHE BEGGED YOU TO ACCEPT HER BUT YOU HUMILIATE HER LOVE CALLING IT A TIME PASS. SHE TRY TO COMMIT SUICIDE 3 TIMES. PROBABLY BY NOW SHE WOULD HAVE SUCCEEDED IF YOUR SEEDS WEREN'T GROWING IN HER WOMB. I HAVE SEEN HER DYING EVERY SECOND OF HER LIFE. WHERE WERE YOU WHEN EVERYONE ABUSE HER CALLING HER CHARACTERLESS. SHE TRUSTED YOU, LOVE YOU WITH ALL HER HEART AND WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO THAT INNOCENT SOUL. YOU WILL NEVER REALIZE HOW IT FELT WHEN YOU LOVE SOMEONE SO DEARLY BUT THE PERSON THROW YOU OUT CALLING YOU A PROSTITUTE.

He apply the brakes and brought back into his senses.

That's enough! He have to take a decision for khushi and his unborn. He cannot let her to suffer anymore longer.

''I will marry her and rectify my deeds, fulfilling all the duties of a father and a husband which I failed to do that in past due to my ego. She needs me and I cannot risk her health by keeping her in someone else house. I gave her pain and I will only heal her. No matter what I would not permit her to stay in Karan's apartment and allow him to get close to her. And for that I will get married to her..'' This is only way he would keep her in front of his eyes always and able to win her back. But will she agree to marry him? Definitely not! He don't want to impose his right on her again.

At the end it will be her decision whether she wanted to accept him or not. He will never force her to accept his love even though he deserve it. The way he treated her it's going to be very tough to forgive his deeds. Its high time to take some necessary steps. For that one important issue he need to clear it. That is LAVANYA.

He need to reveal everything about his and khushi relationship. But how? His life is so messed up. His Di condition is not well. In such situation how he will talk with Lavanya about khushi? He slammed his brakes and lean against the steering. His mobile started ringing. He was shocked to see the time and it was Lavanya calling.

''Asr where were you?''

''I am on the way home, I will be there in half an hour..wait for me''

''Of-course baby I am waiting in our.. I mean in your bedroom..'' Lavanya said seductively. She heard a sudden beep sound on other end. By knowing Asr is coming home, she was feeling very happy. But what he wanted to talk? Some doubts arise in her brain. Why he was sounding worried? May be Khushi's madness washed from his mind or probably he decided to marry me..'' She wondered over exited. With that thought, she went in her bedroom to wear a sexy short dress.

On the other side, Arnav decided what he has to do. Even if it would hurt his Anjali Di he don't care but this truth needs to be revealed in front of his family and to everyone. He drove toward Raizada mansion to gave a new dimension to his and khushi's relationship.

''I am sorry Lavanya but tumhe meri zindagi se jana hoga..main khushi ko aur tadapte hue nahi dekh sakhta..'' (You have to go away from my life..i can' see my khushi so broken..)

To be continued!

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