(OP meets rare high grade. Here we go.)

(Also, the location is in the main base, N.A.V.I.G.A.T.O.R HQ 10 central. And Hailen is Nocturne's bartender. She also has a Brooklyn accent. I tried. I really did.)

Cuz y not. N.A.V.I.G.A.T.O.R = National Area of Valued Informational Gathering and Applied Testing in Obligated Research.

Optimus had walked into the bar, looking for some action (and Bumblebee), enjoy.

Hailen: "Ey! I see ya Prime, c'mon in, n' have a seat. There's a nice drink up 'ere that's garunteed ta' get ya knocked out in tweny' minutes, and it has your designation written all ova' it!"

Optimus: "I don't want to try anything too extreme. I have a team to lead."

Hailen: "D'awww, c'mon OP, don't be such a wimp. It's not dat bad, ya just gotta letch'a self loose every now n' den."

The red mech let out a deep sigh.

Optimus: "How strong is it?"

Hailen: "Ay, it's ma' job to get everyone 'ere as drunk as possible"

Optimus: "Should I take it if I want to be able to tolerate Ratchet tomorrow?"

Hailen: "Hun, ya asked fa' some ena'gon, and this is a bar. Suga' you gonna get one of the finest high-grades we got sittin' on 'ese shelves." She said sliding a glass of the magenta liquid to him with a navy blue swirly-straw resting on the rim.

Optimus: "Where did you get these straws?"

Hailen: "Eh, ol' friend, ya probablay knew 'im. Lil' red n' white mech."

Optimus: "Hm"

.•*•. Not even ten minutes later .•*•.

Hailen: "I think t'was too strong.."

Optimus: "aHAhAhAhAhAh! AnO- *hic* ANOTHER!"

Hailen: "I think ya had enough by now. That's the seventh glass"

Optimus: "A-and I need six uh, sixy-heheheh *hic*, six moaar"

Hailen: "No"

Optimus: "Whaddabout five?"

Hailen: "Nadah. Maybe text time, eh? Like ya said, ya got a team to lead. And what's a team without its leada'?

Optimus: "A uhhh... A leaderless team! HAaHaAhHaA! *hic*

Hailen sighed, grabbing the walkie-talkie on her hip, and pulled it up to her dermas, the cord bouncing and wrapping around her digit as she coiled it.

Hailen: "Ey, boss. There's a problem."

Nocturne: [::*What is it this time, Hailen? *::]

Hailen: "Drunk red Prime ova' 'ere"

A sigh was heard through the static

Nocturne: [::*I'll deal with him, as of you- close up the bar, the high-grades are prohibited until further notice *::]

Hailen: "Got it. *ahem*. Sorry everybody! Drinks are closed fa now."

She closed the drink shack, upsetting the innocent partiers. Meanwhile, a drunk Optimus had face-planted into the counter, asking questions about life and other nonsense, his helm turned to the side once he got a comm connection.

Optimus: "Same com-link, what the frag you want?"

Nocturne: [::*For you to get out of my bar. *::]

Optimus: "Nocturne? I-is- *hic* issat yoOu?"

Nocturne: [::*No, it's Vine HQ *::]

Optimus: "YOU LIV-VE"

Nocturne: [::*No, I'm dead. I'm comming from The Allspark. Obviously *::]

Optimus: "A-are you suuu-sure you're not Nocturne? You kind-kinda sound li-*hic*-ke her"

Nocturne: [::*I swear, if you don't get out of my bar right now- I'm coming over there and dragging you out myself. *::]

Optimus: "Come at me"

Not even five minutes later Nocturne came waltzing through the doors with a stern look, and a slightly pissed aura.

Optimus: "oH. You actual-ly-ly came"

Nocturne: "Mhm. Now GET UP."

Basically for the rest of the night, Nocturne was hauling Optimus to the Autobot base by his collarbone.

Well. That was fun to write. Man, I have the weirdest imagination. Anyway my Navigators-

Till' All Are One~ Xx_PRIME_xX

Word count- 600

Did any of you guys see what I did with the drink numbers?He had seven drinks, seven is a prime number, Optimus is spelled with seven letters.He asked for six more, six plus seven is thirteen. The original thirteen primes.Then he asked for five more, five is a prime number, Prime is spelled with five numbers.Optimus is twice the Prime and twice as drunk.