Red Medic's P.O.V.

The year was 2011. The Shogun pack was released onto the market and given in random drops. I was one of the lucky ones. I received it after a particularly nasty death at the hands of the Blu Soldier. The notification popped up on the Mann Co regulation market/drop tablet when I popped back up in respawn.

Once the battle was over, I went to my room to retrieve the package. I had bought a key before another round earlier, so I was good to go. If it turned out to not be something of mine, I would have traded it to one of my teammates for one of my cosmetics they had.

I whipped down the hallway to the medical bay, where I could open it in peace. Once I stepped inside, my doves fluttered to me and gave me bird kisses to say hello. I chuckled and greeted them all individually, before returning to the task at hand. Archimedes alighted on my shoulder. Speaking of Mann Co, I had to buy their stupid bird harness to make sure he 'wouldn't escape on the battlefield'. I knew he wouldn't leave me! I saved him from that wedding service, and he's stayed by my side ever since!

I shook my head clear of the anger surging through me. It didn't matter. Archimedes was here now, and so was the box. I brought the key up to inspect it. It looked simple enough. I stuck it in the lock upon the box and turned the key. The box fell open, and it revealed...

A hairpiece. A women's hairpiece. For me. It also had a bit of poetry attached to it. I took the small paper the poem was attached to and read it. Apparently, this item was called 'Geisha Boy'. How rude...

"Frog leaps into pond. Lotus blossoms fall to earth. Medic has girl's hair." I roll my eyes. Silly cosmetic makers, with their wonderful imaginations. Who thought this was a good idea? I looked at the creator.

"Larolaro, huh? Well, it's a good name." I pick up the hairpiece and inspect it closer. It had my signature curl at the top, and it was clearly sprayed to death. The thing wouldn't budge! It also had those chopsticks coming out of the side, and small cherry blossoms next to a big decorative comb in the middle. There was a ribbon holding together the bun in the back.

All in all, it looked good. I smoothed my hair back and put it on, then looked in the mirror. I had to take a double-take. I looked...amazing.

I stood up and walked over to the mirror in wonder. I wonder if there was anything that went with this...there had to be! I checked the item page. No such luck. Heavy had a matching hairpiece, however. Maybe it would be fun, wearing the hair together. Ah, but Heavy dislikes the hair cosmetics. So probably not.

I started pacing around, thinking of things to go with this. The Blighted Beak? No, this wasn't a Beak hat. The Earbuds? No, the Earbuds don't go with anything! I don't like them, anyway...

Oh, how about the Procedure Mask? I pulled it on, then looked at myself in the mirror again.

"Yes, zhis will do nicely..." I smile under the mask. I'm absolutely in love with this hairpiece. It's almost unhealthy. Almost.

*a few weeks later*

Red Medic's P.O.V.

Oh, Heavy got his matching hairpiece! He probably would never wear it, however. Oh, who cares? I ordered something a few weeks ago from a Japanese company to wear in private with my Geisha, and it was probably arriving today!

"Yo, mail's here!" I raced into the living room.

"Any large boxes?" I asked excitedly. He shrugs and looks through.

"Oh, yeah. It was on the bottom. Wait, why is the label written in Japanese?" I grabbed the package and smiled.

"I don't wanna know, do I?" I shook my head.

"No, jou don't. See jou later!" I raced back into my lab, holding the box like it was my most prized possession. Which it was. I closed the door and set the box on my desk, grabbing my bonesaw to cut the box open. When the tape relented, I could see the red silk. I gasped happily and took it out of the box. I tossed the box away and carefully unfolded the kimono I ordered.

It was made of lovely red silk, custom printed as well. But this wasn't what I ordered. And it was much too big for me, as well. Abnormally large, and covered in fists. It wasn't even female style! Wait...

Oh.

I quickly put it back in the box and raced out.

"HEAVY! HEAVY, WHERE ARE JOU?" I raced up to his room and raised my hand to knock just as he opened the door.

"Ah, uh, Doktor. I think we mess up packages..." I blushed and nodded, handing him his packages. He blushed as well and handed me mine.

"Doktor, one question." I nod.

"Why female style?" I shrug.

"I like zhe feeling of my clothes hugging my curves. Zhe male style flows too much for me." He nods.

"I have a question for jou as well, Heavy." He nods.

"Why did jou order zhe kimono?" He chuckles nervously.

"Is not important, Doktor." I raise an eyebrow at him, my blush dissipating.

"I answered your question!" He sighs and looks away.

"Is to go with hairpiece. I like it." My jaw drops slightly.

"Jou...like zhe hairpiece?" He nods. I smile happily.

"Zhen we can wear it togezher in zhe battle tomorrow!" He smiles shyly.

"You would be fine with that, Doktor?" I nod.

"And zhen, maybe we can wear zhe kimonos togezher as well?" I blush softly and shuffle my feet, looking down. Stupid idiot, blushing like a schoolgirl for Heavy? He'll never like you. It's been four years, he doesn't like you!

"Sure. Would love to, Doktor. If something else happen, well, what happen in lab stay in lab, Да?" I look up, surprised.

"R-Really?" He nods.

"Doktor, I will deny feelings no longer. Heavy loves you. But it will have to wait. Heavy needs to see if this must be returned." He kisses my forehead and smiles.

"Maybe will change in front of Doktor at a later date." I blush madly.

"O-Okay..." He chuckles and closes the door. I shake myself back to reality and go back to my lab. Time to see what mine looks like.

I place the box upon the table and carefully take out my kimono, discarding the box. I look it over. Now, this is my kimono. Wonderfully red, smooth, covered with prints of doves and medical crosses. There was even a fan hidden in the folds of the dress. Perhaps they threw it in for free? It does not matter. What matters is getting this on my body.

I quickly take off my uniform and start putting on the kimono. It hugged me wonderfully and brought out the blue of my eyes. After I was done wrapping it around my body, I put on the Geisha Boy and picked up the fan, opening it and fanning myself with it for a second before looking in the mirror.

Hot damn, I could make a wonderful drag queen. I pose a bit in front of the mirror, when the door suddenly opens.

"Hey Doc, I need ye to come out and check Soldier. It seems like he's-" I turn and look at him, blushing madly. He flushes in embarrassment.

"Eh, I should come back later, then. See ye." He turns tail and runs. I groan and close the door, changing out of my kimono and removing my hairpiece. Of course, somebody had to walk in. He was probably telling everyone of what he saw, and I would never be able to show my face outside of battle again.

"MEDIC!" I sigh and finish pulling on my gloves. I exited my lab and prepared to get jeered at when I reached the rec room.

To my surprise, nobody commented. Heavy looked a bit miffed in the corner, but otherwise, Soldier was choking, just like Demo said. I quickly took care of the problem with Soldier, then walked over to Demo.

"Jou didn't tell anyone, did jou?" He looked over at Heavy, then back at me.

"Nobody's gonna talk about it, is all I'm gonna say." He takes a swig of his whiskey and walks away. I send a confused look to Heavy. He shrugs, trying to hold back a smirk. I brush off the fact that he threatened to kill anyone who mocked me and smile at him, then go back to my lab.

If he was offering what I thought he was offering, then maybe I could order more outfits that would, ahem, entertain him?