A/N: this song that I'm using doesn't exactly suit the mood... but at the same time it does. I'll be leaving a link to the song at the end of the story so that you can listen to it in your own time.

Looked across the smoke filled room

It was always my favourite game to play as a kid... although my friends and I never used actual guns, we did use water guns, and we played it with one gun filled with vinegar, and the rest were filled with water... it was our game.

Felt the tension build

I grew out of it when I turned thirteen though, and soon enough my friends did too... that same year my mother died by my fathers drunken hands, and it sparked something in me... something that made me want to die... it made me crave my end. She was my last hope that I could make it. I had fallen into a deep depression.

This night has only just begun

17 years had passed since my mother had been killed, and for 15 of those years I decided to play some real Russian roulette, 10 of those years were spent finding an appropriate revolver... and I had finally found a 5 shot .22.

So here we go

I had started to play the same day I got the revolver. And I had gotten it a few years after joining 2fort... and after falling madly in love with one very crazy, but sweet as all hell doctor. His name? I never really knew what it was... but I did however know his class name, it was medic, so everyone always referred to him by that. But I never really ever thought he liked me... I mean, why would he? I wasn't important at all, I just sat back, and helped whenever I needed to... and occasionally went out to the battlefield when he was under the weather, i.e. today.

You gotta, just feel the energy

"MEDIC!!" I heard, solider, and Engie yell at the same time... I had to save one, 'but who would be better to save? I mean, Engie is a good friend and all, but he couldn't do much damage soldier on the other hand, had a fucking rpg! So I'll save him!' I though as I ran to my friend.

You gotta, just know who the enemy is

I ran and started to shoot Blu team to clear a way so that everyone who had respawned could make it to Blu teams base to get the Intel briefcase, and we got it.

We are hungry for adrenaline

I hadn't had my respawn set up yet, mostly since I was in the base almost 24/7, so I didn't think it was any biggy to lie about it when medic had asked if I had one set up for me... sadly, I didn't think about how slow my reflexes had gotten within the past 7 years (she got the gun her 3rd year at 2fort)... especially with, like I have continuously said, being cooked up inside the base.

We're about to go insane, you'll see

The blu's Engie just about got me with his shot gun, and I didn't think nothing of it... that was until a rocket flew passed my head and finished off our Engie... so I pretty much threw the intelligence at Soldier.

I was about to finally die... 'and I shall blow out...' that's when I realized something. I still had 2 candles left.

Bring out the guns, we love the danger

I ran like I was being chased by a pair of hungry wolves... which I kinda was, but these wolves had guns, and knives, and other weapons.

As I ran I saw rockets and bullets flying past my head, one almost colliding with my leg, but luckily it didn't.

I soon ran into to the base, and just in time to hear the administrator call "red team wins" over the pa's. Engie, and Soldier were cheering, smiling, and laughing, yet I just walked around the base to medics room.

One, two, three, just pull the trigger

After about 20 minutes with my thoughts, I found medic's room. I walked in, set his medi-gun onto the operation table, went to the cabinet to get the medicine, and poured a little onto a spoon as I walked over to the doctor who was sitting up in bed watching me. "Open up," I ordered, and he obliged by doing so. After he took the medicine he made a face, and looked at me pleadingly, as if saying 'pleaze, don't make me take anymore of zat,' and I just chuckled, while he stared at me, knowing he was going to have to take it no matter what.

One bullet left inside the chamber

I took my chance, leaned in, and kissed him... and he didn't respond to it after a couple seconds, so I pulled back blushing like a mad man, "I-I'm sorry medic, I shouldn't have done that," and with that I walked out, looking at where I had placed the sheet of paper so long ago. 'Why did I ever think he'd like me back! I'm so stupid!!' I mentally yelled at myself.

Let us play some Russian Roulette

I left to kitchen to get a type of goodbye meal... I smiled sadly at seeing a single sandwich in the fridge, 'if this doesn't work this time, I'll have to make Engie another sandwich,' I mentally noted down. I grabbed the sandwich went to my room.

Once I finished eating I pulled out my .22, pointed it at my head, and held it against my temple, and looked down seeing a tearstained photo of my and the guys attached to two pieces of paper, both being maps.

Roulette

I pulled the trigger feeling the adrenalin that rushed through my body seconds earlier leave and I fell on the ground. The last thing I saw was medic there at my door yelling out my name as I slowly fell into unconsciousness.

Everything was done... I left the maps out, somewhat admitted my feelings to medic, and finished my game of Russian roulette.

Song: