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Goodbyes

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Chapter 28: Goodbyes (Rowan's POV)

As we walked out of the conference room, I couldn't help but pick up the pace despite hearing Evie groan softly as her heels hit the floor faster in her attempts to keep up with me. We made it to my office room and I dropped my glasses on the table while sitting in my seat. 

At the same time, she stood in front of my table and placed her hands on the black marble, staring at me. "Rowan, come on."

I looked at her, running my tongue along the inside of my cheek. "Come on, what?" 

She put her hands up in surrender quickly. "If you want to mope, then just say you want to mope. But it's not the best look for you. I'm going to get some coffee, can I get you anything?" 

"I don't think caffeine would help me at this very moment, Lyubov." 

"Great, then I'll bring you tea." 

"I hate tea." 

"You won't after I make you one. I'll be right back," she said before shuffling out. 

"Yebat," I released a breath, the Russian curses slipping out of me as I pinched the bridge of my nose as a headache took over behind my brows. Fuck. I tipped my head back, staring at the ceiling while replaying the meeting in my head over and over again. 

College? He truly expected me to visit him while I was in Russia for college? I drowned everybody out for those four years and even if I had to talk to anybody, Daniel would be the last person on my list. 

I certainly know who the first would be. 

When I left for college, I didn't think being far from New York, the only place I had come to consider home, would be so difficult but because of a certain person, it was. 

"For fuck's sake," I sighed, groaning in frustration and walking to my window, pulling it down and locking it shut while glaring at Nate, Grandpa, and the Spencers who all sat in the backyard for lunch. The laughter, the giggling, the jokes were my biggest headache right now when I was trying to pack up the last of my things before I left for St. Petersburg this weekend. When I walked back to my suitcase, I heard the laughter finally dying down and I released a breath of relief and continued folding up my clothes and packing the suitcase. I didn't pause even when I heard rapid footsteps up the staircase and right to my door which was soon thrown open. 

Catching her breath, she stormed up to me and grabbed the t-shirt out of my hand, throwing it onto the pile on the bed. "You're leaving?" she asked. 

I stared at the suitcase for a minute before meeting her gaze as I grabbed the t-shirt she threw and began folding it neatly again only for her to toss it away again. 

"You're leaving," she repeated but it wasn't a question this time. 

I faced her. "You seem less happy than I expected you to be, Lyubov," I said, tipping her chin up using my knuckles. 

She clicked her tongue, her nose scrunching up in annoyance before she swatted my hand away. "When? Why didn't you tell me?" 

"I wasn't aware I was expected to." 

"Rowan, please," she groaned, running a frustrated hand through her hair. "I had to find out from your grandpa that you're leaving this weekend and nobody knows for how long. I don't even... Wha— Where the hell are you going?" 

"To college." 

"Where?" She watched me as I resumed packing. 

"Russia." 

"Why?" she whined, giving me a push. "What's wrong with New York?" 

"A lot of things but that's not why I'm choosing Russia." 

"Then why are you?" 

"Careful, Evie. Or I'll start to believe you'll actually miss me," I smirked. 

She folded her arms across her chest and took a step back, watching me. "You're really leaving." 

"I'm done with high school, do you expect me to fucking wait for you?" 

"Yes," she answered, raising her voice at me. 

"Evelyn—" 

"Don't." 

"You're fifteen, all right? You've got three years left ahead of you. If you're lucky and I'm unlucky, I might even be back by then." 

"So you are coming back?" 

"Maybe, I'll see." I stole another look at her while she stared at all the packed things lying around in boxes with a frown on her face. "Don't miss me too much." 

She scoffed, glaring at me. 

"What? I thought you hated me," I replied. 

"I do. That doesn't mean I want you almost six thousand miles away from me." 

My eyes narrowed. "Did you google that?" 

"Yeah," she mumbled, avoiding my gaze. 

"Why are you getting so pissy about this?" I questioned. 

"I don't know. I just can't believe it. I mean... What am I going to do without you around?" 

"I stay away from you as much as I can. We're hardly together." 

She rolled her eyes. "I'll have nobody to annoy." 

"I'm sure you'll find somebody. It's not that hard for people to be annoyed by you." 

She hit my arm. "Dick." Without my permission, she sat at the foot of my bed and watched me pack my things with her shoulders slumped. "Are you going to visit?" 

"I'm not sure." 

"Not even Nate and your grandpa?" 

"I'm leaving because I want to get out of here, Evie. Coming back every few months sort of makes the whole experience loses its purpose." 

"Won't you miss them?" 

"They'll be fine." 

"Will you?" 

My eyes cut to hers. "Why wouldn't I? There isn't one thing or one person I care about in this city." 

She stared at me and then her eyes narrowed. "You'll miss me." 

"No, I won't." 

"Yes, you will." She stood back up. 

"I will not." 

"You know what, you say we're hardly together yet somehow, I'm the only person in this world you actually talk to." 

"It's called arguing." 

"Either way. So, where in Russia are you going?" 

"Curious?" 

"Would I freaking ask if I wasn't?" 

I rolled my eyes. "St. Petersburg." 

"Miss me," she ordered, pointing a finger at me. 

I grabbed it, tugging her forward. "Never," I countered. 

She pulled my hand down. "You will. You just don't know it yet," she smirked and then pulled her hand out of mine. "Well, I still have you for another week," she added, coming up on her toes and still struggling to reach me as she brought up a hand and poked at my cheek. 

"Then I shall prepare to avoid you this whole week," I replied, leaning down with my hands on my knees to reach her height. 

"Think about it. You might never see me again," she said, lifting a brow. 

"That's like the whole point," I countered, lifting a brow. 

She rolled her eyes at me before staring back, both of us refusing to look away. "At least don't leave without saying goodbye." 

"I hate goodbyes," I reminded her. 

"I know that. But I don't want you to leave before I see you." 

"I'm starting to believe you don't really hate me." 

"Well, I feel like being nice since you're leaving soon," she grinned. "Miss me," she demanded again. 

"I'll try," I retorted dryly, watching her as she left, going back downstairs. 

That very weekend, I was all packed up and ready to go. Grandpa was still getting the car ready while I sat on the porch, waiting. It was only eight in the morning and little Ms. Sunshine wasn't awake yet and still relishing in her summer break. I wasn't going to say goodbye to her like she asked. 

I hated goodbyes, they were the worst thing in the world. Most painful, most terrifying, most heartbreaking. 

I thought I'd gotten lucky until she came walking over, still wearing her Hello Kitty pajamas and a plain baby pink tank. Her hair was in a mess of a bun while she stumbled over to me and blindly sat down, groaning loudly. 

"I thought I got away with escaping you," I said. 

She sighed and then put her head on my shoulder, both of us sitting there and hugging our knees. "Not yet, Mr. Rowan, not yet," she mumbled. "I woke up for this." 

"You shouldn't have. It's a waste of time." 

She hit my knee. "I hate you but that doesn't mean I wish you the worst. You should have a good time in college. I'll be in college soon too," she said sounding both nervous and excited. 

"Three years is a long time. Make sure you graduate high school first, idiot." 

"Asshole," she bit out, lifting her head and turning to look at me, squinting a bit under the bright atmosphere. She paused in thought, both of us staring at each other. "Not that this would happen, but what should I do if I miss you?" 

"Nothing. Just don't try talking to me. Deal with it." 

She rolled her eyes at me and then looked straight ahead, staring at the grass. "And... What would you do? If you... miss me?" 

I stared at her, surprised to hear a sniffle come out of her. She was crying and I had no idea how to react or what to do. Sure, I'd seen her cry before but it was usually because of something I did to her and never to see me go. "I'll write you a letter," I found myself saying. 

She frowned in confusion, meeting my gaze. "What?" 

"Don't expect any. I won't miss you anyway. But if by some miracle I do, then I'll write you a letter. Okay?" 

"Promise?" She held out her pinky. 

"Grow up," I groaned. 

She clicked her tongue and grabbed my hand, locking our pinkies together. "You promised. Keep it," she said, staring at me. 

"Rowan, let's go!" Grandpa called out as I heard the trunk close.

I blinked away from her and stood up, standing still when her hand refused to leave mine. Groaning loudly, I turned and looked down at her. 

"Rowan," she said softly. 

I yanked my hand out. "Don't be annoying, Evie. Get over it." Wordlessly, she stared at me as I grabbed my backpack and started heading to the car. Opening the backseat door, I tossed my bag inside first but just when I opened the passenger door and was about to climb in, I felt someone grabbing my arm to spin me around. 

Turning, I looked down and saw her standing before me, her nose red with tears streaming down her face. "You couldn't be anymore clingy, I swear to God," I mumbled. "Why are you being such a crybaby? It's not like we're—" I froze in place, feeling her arms go around me just as a sob racked through her. 

"You're so mean, I hope you never come back," she cried before pulling away and giving me a hard shove. She wiped her cheek angrily before storming away, stopping beside Nate and folding her arms, glaring at me. 

Nate laughed, putting an arm around her and shaking her a bit but she didn't move or react and continued to watch me. I stood still for a beat before climbing into the car and closing the door. 

"She'll miss you, couldn't you at least give her a proper goodbye?" Grandpa asked. 

"She hates me," I reminded him. 

"You can hate someone and still miss them, Rowan," he sighed before turning the car on. "Wave at least." 

"No. Just drive, please." 

The door swung open and I heard a soft whisper, "Fuck me." 

Snapping out of my thoughts, I watched as she walked, holding two cups, one full to the brim which was on the verge of spilling. Taking short steps, she rushed to the table, putting them both down.

 "Here. Have some tea and just try to calm down at least." 

"Did you miss me?" I asked suddenly, not even realizing the words were coming out of my mouth. 

"What?" she laughed. 

"When I went to college. Did you? Miss me at all?" 

She stared at me for a beat. "Why do you suddenly ask?" 

"I'm curious. You cried like a little kid when I left." 

"I did not," she scoffed. "You remember it all wrong. In fact, I was over the moon to watch you leave. And no, I did not miss you. Did you miss me? I never got any letters," she smirked, sitting down. 

Trust me, they're there. 

"That's because I didn't miss you." 

"Not even a little bit?" 

I rolled my eyes at her. "Absolutely not. You were somebody I had to tolerate. You were a waste of my time then and you're a waste of my time now." 

She stared at me, hurt flashing in her eyes before glancing down at the table and sliding her hands off as she stood, clearing her throat. 

Oh fuck... 

"I just remembered, um, I have a report to finish... I think." She took her cup of coffee. "I'll be right back, give me a few minutes." She began to leave. 

My hand clenched into a fist under the table but I didn't say anything to stop her. 

"Have the tea, okay?" She quickly pulled the door open and left.

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Chapter 28

Rowan's hot, then he's cold. He's yes, then he's no lmao

next chapter: project