Chapter 8

The Four P's

Patience, Positivity, Punctuality and Perseverance

The vehicle to a smart and impressive personality comes in handy and all you have to do is be yourself and never give up.

Patience:

As much as we love people who are calm and patient we are the ones who are always cribbing about the delays, the inconvenient weather, the corrupt politicians, delayed trials and judgment and a lot more.

Often when we are in urgency of a certain thing or we are in need of reaching deadlines, we are stressed.

The stress in turn leads to short temper that brings along wrong decisions and it mostly affects our tongue which turns bitter while we all know that a sweet tongue can melt the hardest of metals and the bitter tongue breaks the thinnest of the glass that is relationship.

So if we pull in a little bit of patience world would be at our feet.

I have often seen people cursing while they are waiting in the queue and soon that curse turned into disappointment and few times it ends into a fight.

The very purpose of waiting in the queue is wasted and also the bitter taste is left behind which not only affects us but also the person at the other end of receiving.

I have earned a lot of friends and they mostly compliment me that they are comfortable and like being with me.

They say they can talk to me.

Because I am a listener:)

No offenses to my dear friends but I would add that I am a patient person.

I keep myself calm and let them speak before adding my bit.

So it's a win-win situation.

Again no one is super powered to be patient all the time, we all have our exhaustion level some last longer than the others.

So the key word that I often use with my kids is the magic pill...

My kids are professional sport players and when they are participating in a tournament there are times when they have to wait for hours till it is their turn to perform and is often delayed so before leaving from the house I pull out imaginary tablets from the drawer of meds and offer them one with water "here take this tablet of patience, it will help".

Trust me their energy lasts longer, they are better than other kids, complain less and are well prepared for the wait.

Sometimes though in a hurry I forget the pills but still I have plan B for that..

I keep on repeating myself

I am a very patient person.

It takes more than the current situation to break me.

Okay other than the waiting lets see where else do we need the magic of patience.

Have you ever noticed why an argument starts?

It's often the statement made by the former one that is unacceptable by us that argument occurs.

I am sure each one of us who are readers and including me the writers herself have come across some argument or the other

But have we ever thought or made a recap of the same argument.

It is mostly due to the lack of patience on our part that we fail to access and analyze the meaning of the statement that the former one had made.

When we are relaxed and sitting calmly and rerun the argument all over again, we often realize that there was no need of getting hyper over the silly thing. Most of the times the things that we argue upon do not even matter in our daily life.

I therefore conclude that Patience though difficult but with thorough practice will be like studded diamonds to your personality

Positivity:

The word itself is full of energy

Positivity is contagious

Positivity is the first step to success

Positivity is attractive

Positivity is a bless

Positive is the seed that we are sown with.

We wake up in the morning with the positive belief that it is morning, sun is up and the whole day awaits us.

But how much difficult it is to be positive all the while?

We all know that positivity is the essence of life but find it difficult to maintain that positivity.

Often the negative thoughts empower us. They take us away from the vibrations of positivity

We are so self critical that we forget the value

We have almost 60,000 thoughts in a day.

Is it possible that all these thoughts can be positive?

The answer is a big No.

But that doesn't mean that we can give up on our efforts of being positive.

I wont say that positivity would take away all the hardships or hurdles or troubles in your lives, it simply makes dealing with them easier.

Again a scientific fact that what ever you think you get and if you always try and think positive however impossible it may seem your body develops energy to follow what you are thinking, the best of your benefits that it should be positive.

So my dear friend instead of thinking for the worst or worrying for the things that might happen lets focus only on positives and think about the best; positives.

Fact:

I had a friend who always worried about the result of her examinations that she tend to think negative about it, I might fail, I might score the bottom best, I might not score to the amount I have studied.

I on the other hand let it be, I focused on the vacations that we were gifted with after months of strenuous studying and enjoyed the most. I was positive that hard work always pays good.

I scored good grades.

Well my friend did not fail at the moment but there was some snag in her results and were delayed for some reason.

She had to wait for another month for her result.

She was even more negative and in stress so I told her to relax and have faith in her hard work.

I convinced her that she had always been better than me in grades and would definitely score better. So she should think positive and wait patiently.

Fortunately she followed what I said.

The positives worked.

The facts get interesting here the university granted her admission on the basis of last results since it was a defaults on their part.

And she went through the process easily.

The positives worked for her.

The anticlimax is yet to come..

After two months of classes when her results arrived she was shocked to see that they were much lesser than she had in her last tests, strangely lesser than me too.

Probably a glitch, but who cares?

Do's:

1. Try your best to think positive.

2. Avoid people who are good at criticisms

3. Deep breathe whenever any negative thought clouds your brain

4. When there is no way out, smile at your consequences, people may call you maniac but this stupidity will open new gates for opportunities

Don'ts:

1. Don't give upon to negative thoughts; push them away with maximum mental force you can apply.

2. Never lose hope

3. Don't empower your negativity by giving it more thoughts, more time or even discussing it with others.

Punctuality

The best thing about the guy that I am dating is he always comes on time.

Can you at all imagine how much turn on it is?

Scratch that when I have few employees working under me and there is one special one.

She is not skilled, neither too educated nor efficient.

Yet whenever there is an appraisal she tops the list

No goodies for guessing why...

She's always on time.

Okay I have a very fascinating Fact to be shared on this.

Hope you don't get crazy listening to my own stories but trust me this chapter would be incomplete and immoral without this event.

Fact:

You all are aware that my kids are professional sportspersons and once my daughter was playing semi-finals..

I got a call from my coach asking whir I was and how long will I take to reach the venue.

I answered him simply "15 minutes sir and that would be exactly 45 minutes before the match."

"Good" he replied and simply hooked up the phone strangely.

When I reached the venue the tournament manager was in a very sour mood and talked to me and my daughter a little sourly which was a little unusual considering our past exchange of pleasantries.

When my daughter won the match and I went for further training to my coach he explained the whole scenario.

He had actually shouted and scolded the manager who had been calling my coach complaining that we were late for our match scheduled at 9.

"I can bet on my dead body. They are never late. Even during my sessions they are always on time. So there has to be some glitch on your part. You guys are surely irresponsible." He scolded the manager you had actually called my coach complaining that my daughter was irresponsible and late for her match.

The manager was also an ex employee of my coach and respected him a lot.

She was upset that she was scolded for her own folly. She had given me wrong timings and was fussing over my irresponsibility.

But cheers to the coach who trusted my punctuality that he was confident enough to scold the person of such higher designation for us.

So any comments on punctuality?...

Do's

1. Start a little early to avoid delays

2. Respect your own time and more than that value time of others too

3. Make punctuality a habit, rather addiction.

4. Keep yourself calm and relaxed whenever you are about to go some place. Because panic or hurry always opens door for delays

Donts:

1. One and only one don't is don't ever be late, no matter how casual the work is and never give excuses, apologies speak louder:)

Perseverance

Strange but this has a strong role to play in our personality.

Fact:

One of my client had brought her query of two different girls been brought up by her own self yet extremely different from each other.

Okay hands up by me, no two individuals are same but here I am talking about level of concentration.

Where one of her daughter younger sibling was 8 on 10 in concentration levels, her elder daughter could only score 3 or 4.

She was very disturbed with this.

This was also affecting the efficiency of her elder daughter who was equally smart with competitive IQ level.

I would like to clarify she never compared the two but yet I am talking about perseverance remember...

So when I dug into her and had a stroll towards her past I did root out the problem.

Whenever she would teach her elder sibling when she was in Montessori with her basics she would switch from one subject to another.

When she found out that she was doing English very slow and had lot to complete in math then she'd shift to math and then again she would realize that she had recitation next morning she would stop the current subject and take the next.

Fortunately though she did not repeat the mistake with her younger one and the results were crystal clear.

Where the younger one exceled and performed well in every field she took , elder one had to be forced and was struggling all over.

Don't worry the elder one was taken care of without her even knowing about it. I gave her few games to play and gave her a deadline that she had to achieve and her mother had to take care and be careful that she finishes it or any other thing before starting a new one.

For example: If she started making a helicopter out of Mechanix, the game she was gifted for the purpose, she had to finish the helicopter, the prize for which was lot of appreciation by each and every member of the family before she could start her another game of making doll house with the box of puzzles gifted to her on the same day.

Gradually she w3as taught persistency in the form of games.

Similarly she was told to draw a picture something she loved to do.

But like any other normal kid she would color half the picture and go to another one, I asked her mother to make sure that she finishes the one she started before jumping to another one.

Result: she won an international award for her drawing, her grades improved escalatory.

Conclusion: Perseverance is the essence of long-term victory.

We can have high goals, work harder, achieve tiny victories but it is all short lived and disposing if we do not persevere or continue what we are doing.

DO's:

1. Enjoy what you are doing

2. Be positive with what you are doing

3. Self reward yourself for tiniest of your achievements

4. Keep hunger for improvement alive.

Donts

1. Never give up.

2. Don't get disappointed with failures

3. Flexibility is good but changing your goals often would take your focus and efficiency away

4. Try not to get bored, enthusiasm is inside; try to spark it in tough times

A pleasing personality is not the one that attract others, it is the one that keeps you attracted towards your ownself.

With qualities of patience, positivity, punctuality and perseverance I am sure you will feel appreciated and attracted towards yourself.

Even if you are in a fix, you'll know you did your best and you are the one with best of the qualities and you are not to be blamed and I am sure you'll sail through

Just keep going:)