The moment I stepped into the hospital, dread hit me like a bullet. My instincts were screaming at me to run out of the place. A part of me was mourning something. 

Luke and Abby lead the way as they carried the flowers and food in their hands. I followed them blankly. You know, something was about to happen and your mind immediately voids the emotion.

The entrance of ICU was buzzing. I could see my parents and Luke's parents, even Abby's father was there. The worried faces that looked through the door while my mom sobbed quietly hugging my dad made me think of all the things I missed to do with my family.

Abby turned towards me with a pained gaze. She ran towards me, engulfing me in a tight hug and sobbed into my neck. I stood at a good distance from the crowd.

I couldn't bring myself to blink. I was scared that if I did they all would disappear from my life.

"Em", I hiccupped cupping my cheeks.

The strained tears flowed when I looked at her. It hit me. My heart was squeezing from pain. I don't want to be here. I wanted to be at my house playing with Papi, getting scolded by Dad and eating those delicious food by Mom.

I didn't realize I walked to the crowd. The pity eyes was nauseating, making me feel the situation real.

"Mom", I stammered. She took her eyes off the door to me.

"Oh Emily", she pulled me into her. I couldn't hold it anymore. The tears were flowing, pain stabbing me again and again.

"We have to let him go to the better place. He is not going to feel any pain, honey", my mom stuttered brushing my head.

That's it. My legs gave up. I slid on the floor and mom went on her knees holding me tightly as I cried my heart out.

It took me a long time for me to step into the ICU. All others visited him, with me and Dad being the last. We haven't spoken since I came and I didn't want to see my Dad cry because I knew he would if I tried talking to him.

I wiped my sweaty palms in my jeans. I walked past my mom giving me a pity smile and patted on my shoulder. Abby and Luke were behind me.

There he was, the love of my life, lying with tubes and machines. As it wasn't agonizing, I was going to let him go.

Luke put a hand on my shoulder. "Speak to him, Emily. He needs you"

Don't cry.

Don't cry.

Don't cry.

I was supposed to be strong and send him off with a smile.

I took the seat next to his side. He looked like a lifeless old guy, weight lost and skin sagging in his face giving him extra wrinkles.

I brushed his hair out of his face, "Papi", I whispered.

His eyes opened slowly, showing his dark eyes. The silver eyes that were full of life was dull. I swallowed a lump in my throat.

"Hey", I whispered. A lazy smile spread across his features. His eyes darted across the room looking at Abby and Luke sat at the couch. 

"Hey old man", Luke smiled at Papi and Papi winked at him. Luke made fun of him as if he was not going to die the next second. Maybe Papi wanted it. Being confined and vegetated could make anyone go crazy.

Abby babbled about her college and how hot guys were. He even replied that he was still hot, making us laugh.

The room was silent as Luke and Abby were on the couch. I waited until the doctor and nurses checked on him. He was in and out of consciousness.

"Emily", his weak voice called for me.

"Yeah", I croaked as I scooted closer to him.

"Secret", he strained.

"You want to tell me a secret?", I asked and he nodded.

"My phone", he couldn't complete the sentence as he started coughing. I put the straw in his mouth.

"Emily"

"Huh", I answered not trusting myself from crying.

"You are my favorite. I never .. told you. I survived her death because of  you. You are her mini version", he smiled.

I couldn't hold any longer as tears flowed down my cheeks. It was unfair for him to leave. 

I smiled among the tears seeing him scowl at me. "Atleast one of us got a good genes"

He took a deep breathe and continued. "Don't miss me too much honey"

I sniffed nodding my head. "I am sorry I wasn't with you"

"I missed my Oreos though", I scoffed at his reply. 

"I see my Love waiting for me. She called me to be by her side. She wanted to tell your dad that he is the love of her life and she loved him more than me. She loves you more than herself. Must say she is hot as ever", he said with a distant look in his eyes. He was looking behind me, at an empty wall.

I wanted to remove my heart to ease all the pain.

"Dad would've showed off if he heard you say that. You guys always argued who she loved more", I snorted.

He took in a deep breathe and machine next to me blared until it settled to a low beep.

"You are all I could ask for. Don't hurt any one around you.  Make yourself happy. Make me proud. Tell everyone your Papi was hot as fuck. I am proud of you. Love yourself more. Have fun with boys but careful not all are like me. Find someone cute and don't settle for any less. You will achieve anything you dreamed of. Remember that.", he took my hands. I engulfed his hands in mine placing a small kiss.

"Please don't leave me", I said with my lip trembling, "I'll bring you Oreos, we will go skiing. I want to take you around the world. Please don't leave me. I can't take it. Please", I broke down in his arms.

He patted my head slowly. Machines blared in my ears. I looked over to see Papi struggling to breathe. Doctors were on his side but I knew I had seconds with him.

He never let of my hands. "I'll miss you Em. I love you", he said looking at me with a smile.

"I love you", I barely whispered.

He was struggling to make a sentence but I wanted him to speak to me. I wanted him to tell he pulled a prank. I wanted him walk to me and hug me. I wanted him to say how beautiful love was and how I was going to get one. I wanted him to hear about my day. I wanted him to continue complain about my dad and I wanted to sneak all the snacks he wanted. I wanted him talk about guys and girls. I wanted him to smile as I entered home, racing to open the door. I wanted the sweet banter between him and mom. I wanted all the embarrassing stories in his life. I wanted dad to correct him like a kid and mom to scold he hesitated to eat food. I wanted my partner in crime, my love, my family, my Papi.

Everything I wanted when into dust when the line went flat. He was looking at me and the smile never left his face. I saw his life leave those lovely eyes.

I never cried this much writing a chapter. I am not sure was it just me or the chapter was so relatable.