"I was surprised when you told me you wanted to have dinner with me. You know, after everything," he said.

"I want a fresh start. A clean slate. My life has been in shambles, as you know. So...starting over," I responded.

"I respect that."

We sat outside as the sun set and the skies turned into a pinkish-purple. It wasn't a romantic date, even given the setting. But I wanted to make things right in my life. I knew Cameron was a good guy...deep down, and I wanted to give him another chance as a friend. I brought him to Luigi's, an Italian restaurant...instead of just In-N-Out.

Cam raises his glass. "To new beginnings. I'm sorry for everything. You're a great girl and I need to see you smiling more."

I smiled and clinked my glass with his. "To new beginnings."

"Have you talked to him lately?" He set his glass down.

I shook my head. "Not since he came to my house that one day."

"Have you tried going to him?"

"No. I want to, but maybe I'm not ready. Everytime I think about him, I get angry. But everytime I see him? I just want him to give a shit." I start getting emotional.

"If he won't fight for you, what are you holding on to?"

I thought about it, hesitating speaking the truth. "The past."

It hurt just remembering everything. It all flooded back but I kept myself contained in front of Cam. We enjoyed the rest of our night. It was nice hanging out with a guy that didn't want to kiss me or have me climb on top of him. I was glad we made up.

. . .

1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8...9...10...

Counting to ten helps calm me down when I get anxious. I lingered in front of Jack's apartment door. I knew he was home, I heard the TV on and I heard his laughter through an open window. Part of me wasn't willing to knock. We haven't talked in weeks. I was unsure if he had moved on or not. If he decided to be with someone else, fine. 

My hands started to hurt for some reason. I guess nervousness can physically hurt after a while. I didn't even get to knock before Jack opened the door on his own. We stood there in silence until he motioned for me to walk inside. So I did. I took a seat on his couch and he sat down beside me, rubbing his knees with his wrists.

"Hi," I awkwardly said.

"Hi," he replied.

"There's so much I want to say but I don't where to begin," I nervously chuckled.

"You don't have to," he spoke softly. "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when I should have been."

"It's...okay."

I knew what I came here to do and it was going to kill me to do it. But I was looking out for me, working on my own life, one that didn't have Jack in it. At least not like that anymore.

"I just came here to tell you that I forgive you. And I'm doing better. I hope you are, too."

"Yeah," he said right before he stretched. Fuck, he's still beautiful as ever. "Johnson and I finished a few tracks and we're gonna try to put them online, try to grow a fanbase or something." He scratched his head, messing up his hair even further.

"I'm sure you won't have a problem with that," I nudged his arm.

He chuckled, nearly blushing. "Thanks. So...can we put this behind us?"

"That's what I came here to do, actually. Starting over. I'm tired of crying everyday and adopting bad eating habits."

He rubs my back and I move around a bit, giving off the signal that I wasn't too comfortable with him touching me like that.

"Sorry," he said.

"It's cool. Um...so I just wanted to make it clear that I didn't come over to make up in that way."

"What?" I could already see the hurt in his eyes.

"I just feel we're better off as friends. We fight, we don't talk, we break up, we make up, this cycle is toxic. You have to see that."

"No, wait. Lauren, we can work through this," he pleaded, taking my hand.

"Probably, yes. But then we'd just fight over something else. Remember that night you said I suffocated you?"

"I wasn't even sober!"

"Intoxicated words are sober thoughts," I told him.

He took a deep breath and leaned forward, putting his face in his hands.

"Can we please be friends?" I asked.

He took a while to think about it and finally nodded. His jaw was clenching and he kept gulping as if he's trying to hold back his emotions. It was hurting me too but this was what I had to do. We stood up and hugged. I took a deep breath.

"With that being said, Mahogany is throwing a bonfire down at the beach tonight if you & Johnson wanna come," I said.

"What time?" His voice shook.

"I'm guessing around 7 PM."

"I'll try to make it," he said.

. . .

The bonfire had a bigger turnout than expected. We figured it would only be about 5 of us but there were about 15 of us...excluding the Jack's. They hadn't shown up yet. Sammy showed up with his girlfriend of the month, Mahogany had brought Liam from the NYE party, Shawn & Matt were talking it up about their childhood and the cool toys they had, and then there was me...just sitting there on my blanket in the sand. The sky was beautiful and I spent most of my time with a beer in hand, staring up at the constellations. Of course, now everytime I look at stars, I think of The Fault In Our Stars and how emotional it made me. But then I'd just have to remember how beautiful Ansel Elgort is and I was okay. He's a modern day Marlon Brando and my favorite.

Suddenly my phone buzzed.

JACK: Not gonna make it. Sorry.

I sighed and put my phone away attempting to enjoy the rest of the night.

"Peace offering," Matt said, holding out a hamburger to me. I smiled and took it as he and Shawn sat with me.

"There's already peace, Matt," I said. "Hmm, Liam makes a damn good burger."

"I know, right?" Shawn chimed in. "Not better than my dad's though."

Shawn aimlessly strummed on his guitar and it was the perfect pairing with the fire. He started playing an actual tune and Matt started making up silly lyrics to it, knowing he couldn't sing. It made me genuinely laugh for the first time in a long time and it was helping me to not think about Jack. Clearly he wasn't thinking about me.

. . .

Shawn was having another show at the same venue as last time. Only this time there was no Charlie, thank goodness. I sat between Mahogany and Matt. Soon, Shawn got onstage with his guitar, sat on the stool, and played a song he had written the night before. It was such a feel-good tune. After that, he started playing another song and it was a beautiful melody. He winked at me and I smiled.

All of a sudden, I hear a voice begin to sing off stage.

Said you've seen it all before, right?

What about tonight?

The voice was familiar and Jack came from behind the curtain holding a microphone.

Won't you open your eyes

Take a look outside

at the open skylight?

He kept his eyes on me the entire time and my heart was doing backflips. The last time he sang to me was before we were dating and we were sitting in his car. He continued to sing and Mahogany took my hand while placing her other hand over her heart.

And it's flights to L.A., trips to Paris,

They could talk but we couldn't care less girl...

Let you shop in New York, drink in London

It's all the same girl

As long as you're comin'...

After another verse, Johnson came out and started rapping, pointing between Gilinsky and I. While he did that, Gilinsky mouthed 'I love you' to me & of course I mouthed it back. He put his hand on his chest and bit his bottom lip, looking a bit more cheery for the first time in a while. Shawn began smiling. He knew about this all along.

When they finished the song, Jack hopped off the stage and I stood up, immediately hugging him.

"I wrote that for you," he said on my shoulder.

"Thank you," I said into his chest. "I really missed you."

"I don't wanna be your friend, Lauren." We pulled away from each other a bit. "I want to be your reason to smile, at least one of them. I want to be your knight in shining armor if you get a flat tire or something. I want to be the first face you see in the morning and the last one when you go to bed. I wanna be with you. I want you to move in. I love you with all that I am and I need you to realize that. No matter what. Ever wonder why older couples last so long? They come from a time where if something was broken, they fixed it, they didn't throw it away."

I've never cried so many happy tears and I truly didn't know what to say. He said it all.

"Girl, if you don't kiss him..." Mahogany said out of nowhere. I thought she was socializing with the rest of our friends so she kind of startled me.

Jack pulled me in and kissed me slowly & gently. I felt his soul merge with mine again and with that kiss was a promise to mend anything that would bend or break in the future. That's what soulmates do.

The End.

. . . . .

Author's note: Temptation 2 is up!