Thanks for this lovely cover! -- Credit to victoriapinkglitter

Ally

"I'm with someone," I confessed.

That was it. He was probably packing up his bag of interests or so-called intentions and booked himself a ticket to the next girl he meets. 

What was I expecting? There was nothing to expect.

I climbed in my car and dropped my forehead on the steering wheel. My hair fell to the side of my face, hiding all the shame I felt. The last thing I wanted was to be like him. I hated him for it and I didn't want to hate myself, too.

I contacted Harvey when I didn't have to. I had the chance to avoid all the unnecessary guilt and confusion I felt. I was responsible for my own actions and how I reacted to it.

"Go on. I feel like there's more to it than just that," he said sounding calm as a clam.

I thought he would've said 'hasta la vista baby!' or I was too much of a work, so why bother with me?

"Okay," I said, taking a long and deep breath before continuing. "I've been in a long-distance relationship with Nick since he moved to New York for college. We made a promise to stay together when he left. After the shit that we've been through, we thought it was the right thing to do. To be honest, I don't think we knew what we were getting ourselves into. It took a lot from us, more than what we bargained for. And, lately, it just feels like we're stuck."

"Are you happy?" He asked. His voice remained deep but soft. A hint of concern trailed along with it.

My lips were parted, ready to voice out my response but no sound came out of my mouth. Did I even have an answer?

Yes. Yes, I did have an answer. I was just afraid to say it out loud. Scared to admit it. Was I ready to face reality? To tell the truth? Was I ready to admit it to myself that I was, in fact, unhappy?

"I don't know anymore," I answered dumbfoundedly. That was the best thing I could come up with.

"If you don't know whether you're happy or not, maybe that's saying something? You shouldn't feel the need to stay with someone when you're no longer happy. Right now you're just lying to him and to yourself"

I lifted my head up. I glanced at the rearview mirror and was greeted with a haggard person staring back at me.

He spoke the truth. Or was it a biased truth?

"Listen, I've been there. There are always two sides to a story, but I think you should focus on your story. No matter what people say, everyone leaves in the end. That's why you should put yourself first," he advised.

"Isn't that selfish?"

"Would you rather be selfless, but unhappy?" Harvey pointed out.

Neither.

Some things were unfixable between Nick and I. Things that I couldn't talk to anyone about. It was blocking the light that I needed, forming a shadow that had been following me around all this time. 

Harvey was still a stranger to me and that was probably why the words were flowing so easily. I didn't get into details with him. I wasn't ready to tell a soul, yet. He never forced anything out of me, but he listened.

After a while, I changed the subject and told him about Alana's visit. I also mentioned her surprise this morning. But, I left out the birthday part.

"So, I still have until then to try and win that challenge?" He asked cheerfully, completely changing the mood from night into day.

Before I knew it, a giggle escaped me. "There is no challenge when there is no available prize for you to win," I reminded him.

"Ah! Right. Right," he mocked, "but nothing is certain in this world."

"What?" I asked, perplexed by that statement.

"Nothing. Don't worry about it. I think we should grab coffee or tea, whichever you prefer, before your trip," he suggested.

"Ahm, I don't think that'll be a good idea," I reminded him, again.

"What do you mean? You're just going to grab non-alcoholic drinks with a new friend. Don't tell me you've never done that before?" Now he was trolling me. Of course, I had. I spent the majority of my free time at cafes. It was my way of exploring the city. I had nothing against Starbucks, but I preferred those neighborhood cafes with cozy interiors that made me feel at home.

Maybe I was thinking too much into it. There was nothing wrong with meeting friends for coffee. At times, Gio would tag along after class. And if the place would permit it, he would give a free show with Ina.

Gio was an attractive man with silky black hair, which at times fell right above his eyes while he played Ina. He always started with his eyes closed, then he would slowly lift his head and welcome his audiences with those piercing blue eyes. Each and every time he did that, the girls would gasp for air from the suffocation of his so-called sex appeal. He never had that effect on me. Maybe that was why we easily connected and were comfortable with each other. After a couple of songs, he would come back to our table and I would be murdered by the girls' stabbing glares. I hated it. Gio definitely enjoyed it.

He used me as his shield from the girls who didn't catch his interest. He always said, "one day she'll see me play and I would finally serve my purpose. But, today was not the day." He was full of shit. He always accepted phone numbers from the hot ones. "In the meantime, a man has to feast," Gio defended himself when I pointed out his bullshit.

Harvey, on the other hand, was a Godly attractive man who shouldn't be seen with my kind. 

If I get those murderous glares when I'm with Gio, what would be left of me when I'm seen in public with Harvey?

Panic drowned me as I realized he played the guitar and sang in a band. What was up with me and musicians? They were the masters of heartbreaks.

After what seemed like a lifetime of "you should," and "I shouldn't," he sealed a meeting the night before I was scheduled to leave for New York. We were to meet at Metropolis Cafe near the campus.

"I like that Cafe," he commented when I suggested the location. I was surprised he knew about it. It was one of the neighborhood coffee shops where the majority of the customers were students from the university.

Before I had the chance to ask him about the cafe, my phone buzzed with a call from Alana.

"Harvey, I have to go. My sister is calling me. I'll see you on Wednesday," I said, cutting our conversation short.

"Yeah, no problem. But can you do me a favor?" He asked. 

"Yeah, sure," I answered without thinking. "I mean, yeah, it depends," I corrected myself.

"Say my name again," Harvey asked with such a sultry tone in his voice.

I bit my lower lip, preventing myself from letting that stupid smile form on my face. My stomach felt like it was filled with ballerinas performing continuous pirouettes.

Don't be so easy, Ally. God. You're embarrassing yourself.

"No," I stood my ground.

"Please," he begged sounding like those irresistibly cute boys with puppy eyes. 

"I really have to answer this call," I lied. I wasn't in a rush to answer Alana's call. She could wait. I could always call her back.

I heard him release a defeated sigh. "Fine," he said sounding like his cheerful spirit had left his body, "until later."

"Goodnight, Harvey," I finally said as my lips parted and stretched from ear to ear. Gah! I was such a loser.

"Ah!" he said as his excitement shined through in his voice.

I chuckled at his reaction before ending our call. 

***

A/N: AAHHH!!! I was so nervous for Ally. I'm so glad Harvey took it lightly. I really hope he doesn't change his mind and his intention, whatever that may be... =P

How did you feel after reading Ally's confession? We're you disappointed? Do you think she's wrong or would you understand where she's coming from? 

Have you ever been through something similar? When was the last time you followed your heart instead of your head?

***Don't forget to vote and comment on your thoughts/feelings/feedback. Thank you! Gracias! Maraming Salamat! Merci! Grazie! Xièxiè! Arigatō!***