Entry Five: His name is Frank

A week has passed since my encounter with that mysterious angel.

I had completed another assignment, but much to my disappointment, he hadn't made an appearance. I was desperate to see him again, but I had no idea how to track down angels, and I didn't want to ask in case I roused unnecessary suspicion. I had casually mentioned it to Bob, but he had just given me a quizzical look and said that he had never thought about it before; angels usually just found us, not the other way around.

So I found myself in a coffee shop on my next free day, looking up eagerly every time the bell over the door jangled out, hoping to catch a glimpse of dark hair and tattooed arms. I knew it was pointless, I wasn't on assignment, so he had no reason to find me, but I couldn't quench the hope that unfurled in my chest every time someone new walked in.

After staking out the door for almost an hour, I began to get dejected, and I stared down blankly at my hands. What was I doing here...my obsession with this angel was border-lining on pathetic.

At first, I had only wanted to find him again so I could die that much quicker...but if I was completely honest with myself, that wasn't the only reason I was yearning to see him again.

He had struck a chord inside me, and his refusal to destroy me had woken me up. When I finished my last assignment, I still felt like a piece of shit - don't get me wrong, but then I imagined his flawless face, and some of my depression had lifted.

I ached to hear him speak, to watch his beautiful lips form words that would enrapture me. I wanted to feel his wings, stroke their soft downy feathers in a tender caress. I knew these musings were ludicrous, I was a fucking demon, and he would never let me get that close to him, but it didn't stop me from picturing it in my seriously messed up mind.

I took a long sip of my lukewarm coffee and heaved a sigh of contentment. Becoming a demon hadn't dampened my love of the addicting drink, it still felt like heaven running down my throat. The only thing that had changed was that I didn't feel the buzz caffeine used to give me, but it wasn't necessary anymore.

Did I mention that demons don't need to sleep? I was constantly in a perpetual state of awareness, sometime I chose to sleep in Hell to pass the time, but it wasn't necessary anymore. Bob told me if we stayed on Earth too long, we would begin to feel drowsy again, just like we began to hunger for food as well, but so far, I hadn't spent enough time on the surface to feel any negative effects.

After emptying my now cooling cup of coffee, I gave up on the futile hope of my angel randomly appearing in this god forsaken coffee shop, but before I returned to Hell, I decided to engage in another pointless addiction.

I lit up my cigarette and drew a long pull into my lungs, which were now impervious to cancer. Closing my eyes in satisfaction, I blissfully exhaled, and when I opened my eyes, I swear to god...or Satan I guess...that I almost shit myself.

Standing in front of me, looking even more attractive then I remembered, was none other than my angel.

"I thought you were never coming out of that coffee shop."

Those were his first words to me, and I will certainly not forget them. The memory of our conversation that followed will never fade, but on the off chance that amnesia is some hidden side effect of being a demon for too long, I will write it down here just in case.

"Would you laugh at me if I said I was waiting for you?" I couldn't believe I had actually had the ability to articulate words, I was so shocked by his arrival that I had been sure I would be struck speechless.

"No, but I think you are lying."

"Well I'm not. Why didn't you just come instead of staying out here?" I questioned him curiously.

"Well I didn't want to confront you in public, just in case things took a nasty turn."

"What do you mean if? Isn't it your job to kill me? I won't fight - I promise." My longing to have this nightmare of an existence end reared its ugly head, and I tried to add a threatening tone to my words in the hope that he would strike without thinking.

"Well I don't see anyone around here you could influence, so you couldn't possibly be on a job, and I haven't witnessed you commit any nefarious deeds today - besides drinking an inhuman amount of coffee, and making me wait ages for you in the cold - so I don't have any reason to kill you just yet." He smirked at me...he fucking smirked, and I melted on the spot, all of my dark and bitter thoughts forgotten.

"Well I am not human, so I can drink any amount of coffee that pleases me." I wasn't about to be out sassed by this adorable little shit. Finishing off with my best wink/hair flip, I smiled to myself in satisfaction.

"Please stop that." Even though his face was serious, I could sense suppressed laughter behind his words.

"Stop what?" I bated my eyelashes innocently.

"Flirting with me!" He actually stomped his foot in irritation like a five year old, which should have looked stupid, but with him it was endearing.

Wait a second...why was I flirting with him anyway? I was supposed to be provoking him to kill me, not shameless throwing myself at him, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't attracted to him, it was impossible not to be, I mean - look at him! His dark hair had been tousled by the wind, and in the light, I could see that his eyes weren't actually brown, but a wonderful sort of hazel flecked with green. I can't produce a word to describe them - but trust me - they are flawless.

"Aw I'm sorry hun, is it bothering you?" I couldn't resist teasing him.

"Yes it is! You aren't supposed to be like this, and you are seriously messing with my head."

"How do you know what I am supposed to be like?" Now that the conversation had taken a more serious turn, I sobered up instantly.

"I just do...I mean - I have engaged with hundreds, maybe thousands of demons, and they have all been the same. Cold, soulless, empty, evil...but you are none of those things. I just don't understand how that is possible. I have never had second thoughts about a demon before, and then you have to show up and ruin everything."

He truly did look like I had shaken his entire world by its foundations, and I felt terrible. I didn't want to be the cause of his distress, even if it wasn't my fault I was such a strange demon, and I wanted to soothe his worries away.

"I may be different, but that doesn't make me a good person. Honestly - you would be doing the world a favor if you killed me right now, and I wouldn't begrudge you, hell - I might even thank you with my last breath. If you want to know the truth, I hate what I have become. I didn't know this was how I would end up, and if I could go back, I would never have killed myself." He attempted to speak, but I refused to be interrupted, so I continued talking over him.

"So please - do me a favor and stop me before I hurt anyone else. If I was truly a good man, I would have spit in Lucifer's face on my first day and have faced his wrath instead of allowing myself to hurt so many people. I am a coward and a killer, and even though I am terrified right now, if I could choose anyone to take me out of this world, it would be you." I hung my head in shame and opened my arms wide in a perfect imitation of what I had done upon our first meeting.

"Don't you understand that I can't?" His harsh words snapped my head up instantly.

"I know I need to, but I am physically incapable of harming you. If I could, I would have taken you out back in that barn, but it feels wrong...and I don't want to live with that regret. My job is to exterminate evil, and I know with all of my heart that whatever you are, evil isn't it. Yes - you have done bad things, but so has everyone. So please don't ask me again..." Actual tears glistened in his eyes, and I felt my own gathering as well.

"I have to go now before anyone in the garrison notices I am missing. Please...just don't die on me. I will find you again soon." With those words, his beautiful wings unfurled, and I was blinded by their brilliance.

"Wait - please, before you go...can I have your name?" It came out in a whisper, but he still heard me.

"It's Frank. If you call my name and visualize your location, I can find you at any time. Please don't betray my trust by using this against me."

The pleading in his voice broke my heart, it had never even crossed my mind to use any information he had given me for evil means. Before I could reassure him that his secrets were safe with me, he vaulted off the ground as if he didn't trust himself to stay around me for a moment longer.

"My name is Gerard!" I called up to him as loudly as I could, praying that he heard me.

Frank. Just thinking his name gives me this warm fuzzy feeling in the pit of my stomach. I am sitting here in my room, replaying our encounter over and over again.

Ever since I had spoken with him, I had begun to realize that just because I am a demon, it doesn't necessarily mean I am this vile creature. Yes - I have committed atrocities, but maybe I wasn't one hundred lost. I mean - he had faith in me...faith enough to give me his name and a way to find him again.

And if someone that perfect could entrust himself to me so completely, then I couldn't be as terrible as I originally believed. I am sure this buoyant mood will collapse after my next assignment, but for now, I pushed all that I loathed about myself to the back of my mind, and relished in the rare feeling of being happy.

I want to apologize 100x over for making you guys wait so long for an update. As you may or may not know (idk if anyone really reads what I post on my message board) I have been so sick this week, and I couldn't find the time to write in between working and sleeping.

But I am finally starting to feel better, so I pumped out a chapter for you guys before I head off to bed. I really like this one, and I hope you guys do too.

As always, I read every comment, and every time I get a vote, I squeal internally :)

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