She was life itself. Wild and free.
Wonderfully chaotic. A perfectly
Put together.

-Unknown

At times I felt my heart slightly crack seeing Hwa Young running away.

I didn't know why I did those things. I wasn't thinking. I was angry at her and I didn't know how to Express this tightness in my chest.

I wanted her but I didn't want to want her .I wanted her to leave that guy. I didn't have a good feeling about him. Nor did I like him because my selfish feeling .

Her lips where sweet and it made my heart beat faster when I Think of her lips.

Lust

That's what it is, I'm just sex deprived it's been over 6 months sense I had some.

This feeling will go away.

___________________

"Haaa,mmmmnn"she sighs in my ear murmuring my name.

All I could think of was Hwa Young and the way her lips felt against mine .

Fucking this stranger didn't even help with my urges.

She wasn't her.

"Thanks babe,if you need anything call me"the blond women says to me winking .

"See you around sexy"i said waving.

-Time skip-

"Yah..."says the distant grandpa as I walk inside the house, I throw my keys to the shelf and glare at him.

"What"i said annoyed

"Where were you?"he questions folding his arms.

"Is that any of your damn business?"I snapped.

"Yes,because Hwa Young was crying when she came in.all she mutter was Taehyung. "He says getting up walking close to me .

"Oh,really now,"I said half chuckling.

"What the fuck did you do to her "he says angrily. Grabbing me by the shirt throwing me against the wall.

Did it hurt?

No.

None of this phased me.father done worse than this; he always done worse.

"I only did this to protect her."

was it? was it honestly trying to protect her?

yes? it had to be, I have to protect her for the Formula .

I need her

I need her for the Drugs nothing more...

"protect her? from what??" he yells, "did you touch her!?" 

I could see his Dark orbs turn sparks of green and golden Honey in a hurricane of rage.I felt his hand slip to my neck trying to choke me.

"YOONGI STOP IT!" I hear a faint voice yell behind us.She grabs Yoongi by the sholder and throws him on the ground. 

"what the hell did he do to you!?" yoongi asks Hwa Young in a worried tone.He's trying to keep himself controled. 

We're all losing our heads, I'm even losing my mind. 

what happen to me?

"He did nothing!just drop it. I just being stupid like I usually am! Just leave him and I ALONE!" She raised her voice clenching her fist. She storms upstairs never looking back.

We just stare at each other not knowing what to do. For the rest of that evening we didn't talk, not even made eye contact.

I fucked up real bad.

Few weeks later.

Yoongi hasn't told her dad anything. Hwa Young hasn't even complained she been dazed or ignoring me.

We been separated a lot. She's been busy with that Chanyeol guy. I haven't quit watching over her.

I feel like shit, I don't even hear her walking around the halls like she use to do. Making a slight humming noise when she cleaned around the house. Until I messed with her. Then she would get pissed off and tell me to go away.

Or the way she would get mad at me and her ears turned red. She would bite those damn lips. Which would turned me on so fucking much. 

I cant belive a girl like her had this much affect on me. I can't stop thinking about her lips on mine, no matter how long we been apart  she drives me mad. 

Like the time I first met her.

At the party, there she was in front of me, at that place I stole her first kiss. Then it was magic full of desire. I wanted her then and Now I still want her. I kiss her again but not with the mask.

am I still the real me?

no, I hold to many secrets and I cant let her know who I am.

She would never love me, I can never love her.

I feel nothing.

I am nothing.

I dont love her

------------------------------------------------------