The next couple days were distant, as always our- I mean his, schedule got in the way.

We'd still check up on each other and talk late at night after practice. He would insist on asking me every night about my day, even if it was exactly the same as the day before- and the same as the day before that; "Nothing much, I spent my time translating footage and helped with organising venues and accommodations for your tour."
And he'd always tell me something like "Practice was intense, I'm so tired. The boys and I just hung out during our breaks. After practice I went to the gym to work out for a bit with Jungkook."
He was always tired but he always insisted on messaging me at night.

It was his birthday soon. It was his birthday soon and I was clueless as to what I wanted to get him.
What could I possibly have gotten him? To be honest I'm not ever sure if I'll even be able to see him, he'll be busy and they'll probably record him when they bring in the cake, and there's also a music show scheduled before a fanmeet... And even if there is a company celebration in the evening, I somewhat doubt I would be a part of it.

A drawing? No, that's stupid, he's seen plenty of drawings of himself.

Should I get him a bouquet of flowers? I'd probably seem too cheesy and love struck.

Clothes? Maybe. But he already owns plenty and he wears expensive brands.

Bake him a cake maybe? I'm not that great at cooking, I mean I could if I wanted to but if it's for his birthday it has to be perfect... I'll just buy him a lemon flavoured cake, he said he liked sour things in that one interview, didn't he?

Maybe I could perform a BTS song? Haha. But as a joke, of course, since I have absolutely no musical talent, I can't sing, dance or keep in beat.

What if I made a watercolour painting of butterflies fluttering around? That would be pretty, and different from anything else he'll get, I hope so at least.

HAHAHA OR MAYBE I COULD TO A SAUCY LITTLE DANCE HAHA.
Of course not, absolutely not.

Maybe I could get him a bracelet? But idk man fans notice everything, what if he wore it often?

Yoongi had messaged me earlier, he was going to just stop by and go over a few English phrases for a new song he was writing.

He arrived wearing navy skinny jeans, black converses, a plain grey top and a denim jacket.
"Hey, how's it been?" He said as he stepped in.
"Nothing much, really, just sorting out a few things for your tour- want some tea?" I asked as I stepped into the kitchen.
"Yeah, sure... do you have green tea?- need any help?" He called from the couch in the living area.
I kindly refused his offer and was back with two cups of green tea in a matter of minutes.
"So, uh here's the thing I wanted you to look over." He handed me a sheet of paper with barely readable writing on it- both Korean and English.
"Sorry~ my handwriting is kind of hard to read..." He quietly apologised as he stared off into space.
"No, worries, I can make it out, mostly."

The writing he made me look over was something to do with Oases, dreams, Neverland and delusions- it was actually quite interesting and I'm anticipating what ever he's cooking up for ARMY.

"Hey... So... Can I talk to you about something?" He quietly asked in a monotonous voice.
"Yeah, sure." I nervously said as I took another sip of my, now lukewarm, tea.

"Well, I sort of feel really bad about the 'handcuff' thing... and the blackmail thing." He looked down and scrunched up his face a little bit.
I stared at him for a moment, waiting for him to continue.
"I really shouldn't have done either of those, and I hope you'll forgive me." he said as he itched the corner of his lips with his index finger.
"Ahh ^^' It's okay, really. I mean it's not, but I'm okay now. And I forgive you, it really wasn't that big of a deal." I paused for a moment to think.
"-besides, with the Jimin thing, it wasn't too bad, before being handcuffed, it was much more uncomfortable, at least now there's a line or boundary. I can't really explain it but it forced us to sort some things out in a way..."

Did I say too much?

"Oh? Oh. That's good I guess." He nodded.
"-You okay with Hana?" He added.
"Yeah, we're cool, she's nice." I replied.
"That's good, I'm glad to hear that, she does seem nice." He nodded once again.

We spent a little more time chatting, but he had to leave since it was dinner time, he invited me to join him and the boys upstairs but I had 'business' to tend to.

I ordered some take out and sat infront of my screen to watch the next episode of 12 Years Promise.
As soon as I had finished my meal, I tidied up and set up my desk for some artsy time.
It's probably going to end up being a shitty gift, which is why I also ordered him a t-shirt too- it was nothing special, it was a plain black long-sleeved- I actually can't describe clothes, but the description online said
'This long sleeve t-shirt features a crewneck and a comfortable regular fit. Showcasing the iconic Original Stock graphic print on a 100% premium soft cotton build (Grey Heather colorway is 90% cotton, 10% polyester blend). Available in black, peach, grey heather, blue or white colourways. Made in Mexico.'

It was Stussy and I knew he liked Stussy, so that's what came to mind.

Speaking of Bangtan's clothes, WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS SO FREAKING EXPENSIVE?
It would make sense if they were replicas actually, like, over 1300$ for one of the jumpers that Jungkook wore? Yoongi's palm tree top was 670$, I mean... WOW. If they're actually bought, woowowowow. Of course they could also be sponsored or borrowed.
Either way, I'm jealous.
I want a banging wardrobe too.

I began painting my gift for Jimin, it was on water colour paper- because I'm using fucking water colour paints /-,-/
I had planned it out in my head it was going to be a swirl of butterflies, all different shades of pink and blue, and even a few purple, the ones closer up we going to have way more detail and there were going to be flower petals floating about.
OH GOSH THAT SOUNDS SO CHEESY.
Would he even like that?
What else could I have possible painted?

I went along with my idea but kept the tones cool and made sure it didn't look too vibrant, I wanted it to look hazy.

It took me a while before I was happy with the painting that lay before me. I stared at it before I signed the corner and wrote on the date 121016.
I put it in a gift bag along with the top.

I checked the time, 12:04. I threw myself onto the couch and scavenged for my phone, it took it out and typed my him:

Happy Birthdayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! I hope you'll have a wonderful day- filled with plenty of joy, laughter and happiness (which ik is very difficult without me around, but you'll have to make do).
Literally, thank you for being born, thank your parents for me. They gave birth to a wonderful, beautiful and talented pabo.
And You're my favourite pabo.
Don't go anywhere, ok? xx

I chewed my lip and pressed send.

Was that too much? Am I being too clingy? I nervously waited for a response- even though he was probably sleeping by now from all the exhaustion.

BLUURPPP BLUURRRPP

I immediately picked up my phone and stared at the screen:

Thank you.

Is that it?...

My phone went off again.

You're my favourite pabo too :)

I smiled to myself and started typing another message as I made my way to my bedroom to pick up my pyjamas.

:) Thank you.
I'm sorry that I won't be able to join your birthday celebration, I really wish I could, don't forget to smile for ARMY okay?

I pressed send and resumed preparing for bed. I was very sad and grey, I really wanted to spend his birthday with him, but between the music show in the morning, the fanmeet in the afternoon and the Vapp live party in the evening- not to mention that the rest of Bangtan don't even think we're friends, unless Yoongi put the pieces together.

My phone went off on final time that night-

It's okay, it's not your fault. I'll smile lots, don't worry, and I'll be thinking of you.
I'll see if I can stop by at night, after my Birthday schedule.

I rolled over to the edge of bed and left my phone on the nightstand (I know what it' called now ty).

I woke up in the afternoon, I had nothing to do that day.
Absolutely nothing but wait. I was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling when an idea dawned onto me- it wasn't too late.
And I had a company employment badge.

I flung out of bed, threw on a pair of jeans and a dark grey shirt, I put on a plain face mask and a cap, then bolted out of my apartment.
I quickly walked, anxious, hoping my idea would work.

As I arrived outside the venue, I looked around and saw almost 300 fans inside- all of them meerkating to see Bangtan, all of them holding cameras up- some of them were just normal digital cameras, but a lot of fans had the expensive stuff. These, these girls were the ones we have to thank for the high quality photos of those little angels.

I walked towards the entrance, where the guard stood- his name tag read'Jung HaJoon', he asked me for my identification and fanmeet reciept, lucky me, he worked for Bighit and not for the venue. I took off the mask and showed him my employment badge, "What are you up to?" he asked confused.
"Please just trust me, I have some business to tend to." He pursed his lips and eventually let me through.

It worked.

I was so happy. I walked into the venue and joined the fans at the back of the crowd, I was smiling from ear to ear, but no one could see, my mask was back on.

I watched, wide-eyed, fascinated by the event. I'd never been to a fanmeet before- Which is hard to believe, I KNOW, I'd been Korea for almost 3 years and I hadn't even managed to see them?
Well now I live beneath them so that's an accomplishment in its own nature.

The music died down and Jimin stood up to speak, the event itself hadn't started yet. From what I heard from the group of Korean girls chattering in excitement to eachother; first, BTS were going to do a panel, then bring a cake for Jimin (Or so they assumed, Jimin wasn't supposed to know), sing a song for the fans, then have the fanmeet and sign itself.

"Hello everyone, thank you for coming, I really appreciate all of you coming out to see us today! I hope we can have a wonderful day together at this fanmeet! Today's my birthday, it's my 3rd year with ARMY and Bangtan, and I honestly can't explain how grateful and blessed I feel for having such amazing people around me who always show there support. Thank you, so much. Thank you to BangPDnim, Bangtan, my friends and family, and ARMY. I hope to show you better sides of myself next year, I'll work hard to give you all cool and impressive performances in the future.
Thank you so much. I love you." He slowly sat down after smiling for and making hearts for the countless cameras.

"I LOVE YOU TOO PARK JIMIN!" A fan yelled from the left centre of the crowd.
Jimin shyly responded "Ah, thank you! I love you too :3".

I started feeling hot so I took off the mask, I was going to put it back on when I had my turn at the fansign, but for the time being, I was all the way at the back and no one could see me so it was okay.

I felt someone nudge me on my side, I turned to find a pretty Korean girl, with light brown eyes and plump lips, her hair was in a bun. Gosh she was beautiful.
She opened her mouth to speak, "Uhm Hi? Where are you from?" she asked in a shy tone.

I smiled and replied, "I'm from England, but I'm Turkish."

"Oh, that's cool... uhm how you did come Korea?... uhh-" She paused to think out her sentence.
"Hey, it's okay you can speak Korean!" I giggled.
"OH? You can speak Korean?" She said cheerfully.
"Yes ^^" I answered as I nodded.

Her name was Song Jiwon, she was 22, and she was currently studying fashion in university.
We spend a majority of our time talking to eachother whenever we had to wait, she was here alone too. I found out that she was extremely into fashion and music, and that she ran a youtube channel where she uploaded violin covers of BTS songs.

I laughed when she told me here title tag for her covers- "Song's Covers, GET IT?" then she burst out laughing.

There was a question panel, fans asked cute questions like "Do you have a stuffed animal or blanket that you can't sleep without?" or "Out of everyone, characters included, who's your hero?"- in which most members answered as their parents but Jungkook also mentioned Jimin,
"- but I also very much admire Jimin Hyung, he always works diligently and tries his hardest. Training for countless hours. I really admire how hardworking he is and how cheerful he manages to be despite how tired he gets."

"Yeah I agree with Jungkook" Yoongi added.

The corners of Jimin's lips curled into a smile, he was trying to hold it in, but soon he was grinning and his eyes had disappeared, "Thank you, thank you guys."

Another memorable question from the panel included, "What's a film that made you cry?" in which Yoongi responded with "None.", and a few of the others named movies like Up, Big Hero6, My girl, Ode to my father, and Jimin's answer "I am legend..." which gained a lot of laughter from the fans, accompanied by a chorus of 'ME TOO's.

One of the final questions were "Jimin oppa! What do you like to do on dates?" as soon as he heard the question he nervously chuckled a little, "Well..." He thought for a moment before grinning and answering, "I'd like eating icecream, and I'd like walking and chatting, or just sitting on a park bench and listening to music."

"Aw how cute,he's so adorable and so pure and so sweet, I want to go on a date with him :<" Jiwon whined from beside me.

"Yeah, me too." I replied as I tried to hold in my laughter. Thank god she was too occupied with staring at Jimin.

"Sorry, but he can only date me ^^" said a voice that I didn't recognise, it was a girl, roughly my height, her hair was black and pin-straight, she was holding a large camera that read 'Canon' on the sides.

"LOL, good luck. What do you seriously think are the odds of him dating a fan? Let alone you." my new friend replied in a joking tone.

She pursed her lips, "I know... I know. But a girl can dream. I'm Kim Jansu, nice to meet you!"
We both greeted her and introduced ourselves.

I took this opportunity to ask the one question I'd been aching to-
"So, what would happen if Jimin got a girlfriend?" I nervously stared at the two girls as I waited for an answer.
"Well... I'd be sad, of course, but as long as they're both happy I mean..." Jiwon dully replied.
"Yeah I think I know what you mean, I think I'd be okay with it if she made him happy, but I'd still be sad. I'd also be very worried for her." Jansu said quietly.

"What, why? Why would you be worried for her?" I asked, trying to sound calm.
"There aren't really that many crazy fans, but I know about a handful that are INSANE."

--.--' greaaaat.

Soon BTS, performed 'I know', the song that Namjoon and Jungkook released for the 3rd year anniversary. It was the first time hearing everyone else in the group sing it with them.
It was beautiful. I'm not ashamed to say that I actually teared up.

After that, they performed a bonus song, they all covered Taeyang's 'You're my', they'd performed it before a two or so years ago, but with how much everyone's vocals improved, it was- spectacular.
I looked around me at one point, all these fans, all these girls, were so happy.
They were ecstatic.
As was I.

About 40 minutes had passed, and now people were in line for their fansign and meet. I arrived so freaking late, that of course I was at the end of the queue, but I didn't really mind that.
I was strongly considering keeping the mask on for until I reached Jimin, but then that would be too obvious if Hosoek and Namjoon saw, since they were seated by Jimin's sides.

I checked my bag to make sure I had my Young Forever album with me, ofcourse my photocard was Jimin- but that wasn't planned out. I almost always got him. Lucky me ^^.

It took over an hour until I was near the front of the queue, for some odd reason I was nervous, it was stupid, but I was nervous. I had a box of chocolates to give Jimin for his Birthday, everyone else was giving him cute little stuffed animals, or jewelry- some people even bought in little cupcakes they'd baked. He looked really happy, I could just watch him interact with fans all day.

Finally, I was next.
I looked ahead, Taehyung, Jungkook, Namjoon, Jimin, Hosoek, Seokjin and Yoongi were seated along a line of tables with white cloths over them.

First stop- Tae.
"Hi~" I said in a sweet tone as I handed my album to him, open on my favourite photo of him.
"Hello!" He said, as he signed the album, then, he looked up.
"Sena?" He whispered, confused.
I brought my index finger to my lip and mouthed "shhh", and winked.
"I'm a huge fan! Thank you for your hard work. Don't let anyone upset you, ok? You're not an alien, everyone else is just boring." I grinned.
He thanked me and we high-fived.

Next- Kookie.
"Noona?" He said, dumbfounded, eyes wide.
"Hi Jungkook." I laughed as I turned to his page and handed him the album.
"What are you doing here?" He whispered as he leaned in.
"What? I can't come to fanmeets now? I'm a fan too you know."
"Well, thank you for your support and love, hope to see you again."He smiled.
We touched our hands in the air, we did that thing that idols do with fans at fanmeets.

Up until now it was okay, but as I moved on from member to member, as I got progressively closer to Jimin- my palms started getting warm and clammy.
I was really nervous about his reaction to seeing me.

JIMIN'S POINT OF VIEW:

I waved goodbye to the girl infront of me, I raised my hand and she put her hand on mine.
"Byeeeeeee~ Come again, okay?" I said to her as I smiled as best as I could.
At fanmeets it really gets me thinking, how ARMY is made up of all these people, all these different individuals, all amazing and dedicated to us.

It's overwhelming.

The next girl appeared in front of me and I signed the photo she had chosen,
"Hello! I'm Song Jiwon, really love your voice, you're the best!" She said with a bright smile as she gave me a thumbs up.
"Thank you, nice to meet you Song Jiwon! And I'm not all that great- but thank you for your love and support! ^^'" I responded.

I sometimes feel fans are too nice to me.

Do I deserve all this?

She was smiling brightly, it reminded me of Sena's smile.
I felt something sink inside me. She's probably at home, alone, waiting for me.

I snapped back to reality when Jiwon spoke once more,
"Does Noona have a chance?" She joked.
"Noona!? No wayyy you look so youthful and pretty!" I said, while examining her facial features, she was so pretty.
"Oh stop it >.<- You're just being sweet. So, do I have a chance?" She asked once more, I was clearly wrong to have thought that I had dodged the question.

"I think you'd have a chance with anyone, I believe that we have the potential to fall in love with anyone- but, Noona, you deserve a better guy, and you'll find him." I tried to answer as kindly as possible.

"I have a youtube channel dedicated to BTS songs."
"I do Violin covers." She added.
"OH wait? Song's Covers? You're that Song Jiwon?" I excitedly asked, I LOVED her videos so much.
"Omo, what? You've seen them?" She squealed as her light brown eyes twinkled.
"Yes, Noona, they're really good! Keep up the good work!"

"Oh, And happy Birthday Jiminnie!" She said as she handed me a cream coloured stuffed bear with a t-shirt on that read 'Best looking member: Jimin' I grinned and accepted the cute gift.

I said goodbye to Jiwon, and waited for the next fan to shuffle towards me, she moved along and stood parallel to me, she was looking down- her black cap covering her face.

There was something familiar about her, I looked at her hands as she handed me her album.
"Hello?" I called, "There's no need to be shy!" I joked.

She slowly lifted her head.

I stared at her eyes, peeking from beneath her cap.
Her eyes were a mixture of grey tones and a deep forest green, they had spikes of yellow stemming from the edges of the pupils, and a ring of dark green on the outside.

I stared at the mixture of colours, I stared at her eyes and I already knew it was her before I saw the rest of her face.

An overwhelming joy grew inside of me- butterflies fluttered about inside my stomach, I grinned at her.
She grinned back.

"Hello~" She softly greeted.
"Hi. How are you?" I casually asked.

She was here, infront of me.

Standing infront of me.

"I'm good, how are you?" She said as she tried to stop herself from smiling.
"I'm a lot better now :)" I said in a calm tone.

"Happy birthday, oppa." She said as she handed me a box of chocolates with a post-it on it.

It read 'I bought you something else too but I didn't want to come to the fanmeet empty handed, so please accept this and look happy.'
I laughed at the note then looked back up at her.

I signed her album, but I added a little heart and a butterfly in the corner of the page.

"It's my first time coming to your fanmeet you know." She said smugly.
"Yeah, I know, I would've remembered you." I smirked then winked.

Her facial expression changed and she looked aggravated with me, Yes, I went there.
Yes Sena I smirked.
What are you going to do about it?

She breathed in through her teeth and smiled- "See you later, Jiminnie."
We reached out our hands at the same time.

Our hands touched and fingers interlocked.
I could feel that her palms were a bit warm and sweaty, but it wasn't her worst... haha.
We locked eyes one last time.
I didn't say anything else but we knew what the other wanted to say.

I held on tighter as she started shuffling along to Hosoek.
"See you soon" She mouthed as she left.

The next fan arrived. I was in a good mood from seeing Sena, and in a bad mood from know she was leaving.

I felt bad that I didn't focus on this fan as much, I tried my best- but I couldn't help that my eyes kept drifting to Sena and Hosoek.

Lucky bastard.

Two fans later, she was gone. Back in the crowd.

The members brought out a cake after the fansign, I blew my candles and made my wish.
I refused to tell anyone what I'd wished for.
And I can't tell you guys yet either.
Then it won't come true.

Throughout the celebration I looked around the crowd for her, but I couldn't find her.
It doesn't work out like in fanfictions where the idol and the fan lock eyes and fall in love- most of the time it's overwhelming and you don't even know where to look at, so you focus on the cameras and a couple of the closest fans.

But I felt content know that she was here somewhere.

After this, and after the company celebration and Live V-App, I'm going to stop by her's.
It'd be wrong not to, right? She said she bought me another gift.

I didn't open the box of chocolates, I was saving them for later, but I did make sure to make it clear to the boys that they can't eat it, because this box of chocolates was my favourite.

SENA'S POINT OF VIEW:

The fanmeet was really fun, I exchanged details with Jiwon and Jansu- they were really nice, maybe in the future, if the circumstances are different, I'll be able to invite them over to hang out with Sariah, Lisa, Sungra and Hana.

It was late and I had just eaten a sandwhich, I was waiting for Jimin so I didn't really have an appetite, I was too excited, nervous and scared.

I sat on the couch and looked through all my notifications as I waited.
Eventually, slowly, and unintentionally, despite my struggle not too, I fell into a cold and numb sleep.
It really messed me up, I was awake but I wasn't, I cold and in a dream- or a very vivid imagination that I had no control over.

I slowly got up to answer to the droning sound of my ringtone.
"Hello?" I lazily said.
"It's me, open up." He whispered.
"What? Who?" I asked, confuzzled.
"It's me, open the door, I'm outside." He persisted.
"Um, ok." I said as I slowly dragged myself to my door.

I opened the door to find Jimin anxiously waiting.
"Hi." He said as he smiled from ear to ear.
"Did I wake you?" He asked.
I nodded and stepped aside to let him in.
"Kiyoot." He replied.

He walked in and closed the door for me. He cupped my cheeks with his hands and patted them, "Wakey wakeyyyyyy~" He sang before laughing at me.
"I'm awake, I'm here. Hi." I said as I glared back.
"Aren't you going to hug me?" He smirked.

Ugh I cba to get annoyed.

"Of course I'm going to hug you!" I sluggishly replied before walking into his open arms and resting my head on his shoulder.

I sighed.
"You're comfortable." Then I yawned once more.
"I know, thank you." I said smugly.

He squeezed me tight before speaking in a soft, heartfelt tone- "Thank you for coming to the fanmeet today. I was really happy to see you."

I pulled away from the hug and started walking towards the couch as i wobbled from sleepiness, "Wait, I'm getting your thing." I grabbed the bag and handed it to him.
"Here." I lazily smiled.

He opened the bag and pulled out the painting first, he stared at it with a content expression on his face. "It's really beautiful, thank you."

"You're welcome! I got you something else, just in case you didn't like the painting..." I said as I pursed my lips and waited for him to pull out the top I got him.

"Wow this is really soft. I really like it... It's Stussy? Oooo I love Stussy, thank you thank you." He said before running up to me and hugging me again.

"I'll wear it everyday, and everynight, I'll never take it off." He sarcasticated.
"No, but really, thank you."

We spent some time drinking tea and chatting, we held hands most of the time too.
I just wanted to be around him, and it felt like he wanted to be around me too.

He recieved a message from Namjoon, asking where he was.
And that's when he had to leave.

He had a sour expression on his face as soon as he read the message, "It's okay I'll see you again soon, don't worry." I said as I poked his cheek.

He was just at the door, about to leave, but he stopped and turned back to face me.
"Sena?" he called, with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Why butterflies?" He asked, almost intrigued.

"Well, your song. It's pretty much how I feel. I feel like you're a dream and I'm worried you'll disappear one day. I'm scared."

He had a pained smile, "I'm scared too. But it's okay-"

"There's another reason too." I cut him off.

"Hmm?" He waited.

"It's because you still give me butterflies. And I wanted to give you butterflies." I looked down as a smiled, a little embarrassed with how cheesy I was being.

"Don't worry, you still do." He said as he swiftly leaned in, and planted a soft kiss on my forehead before leaving.

A/N-
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HI GUYS I'M SORRY THE UPDATE IS LATE, WELL TECHNICALLY IT'S NOT, I MEAN I SAID WEEKLY UPDATES BUT LIKE I MEAN I'D UPDATE AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK AND IT'S SUNDAY 9:19PM (ALMOST IFTAR WOOP WOOP)

I ACTUALLY FEEL LIKE THIS CHAPTER SUCKED LOLOLOL IM SORRY, I HAD PLANS.

BUT NOTHING EVER GOES ACCORDING TO PLANS, AY?

Have a wonderful day everyone, hope you enjoyed the chapter (it's difficult to but I hope you did)
Vote and comment if you did.

LOVE YOU ALLLL TY FOR READING <3 <£ <3 <3

062616

I also haven't had time to proof-read thi (or any other chapter tbh im sorry) ut feel free to point out mistakes so i can fixem.