Chanyeol's View

I walked like a living corpse in the hallway who's trying to force a smile. Why am I even trying to smile? I feel so broke inside and out. I've been crying all night because of yesterday and damn, it still hurts. It hurts. So much. I don't know what to do. It felt like I've been stabbed but I think this is more painful. I want to breakdown right here and right now in this hallway if not for the people who was watching. The cries and sobs I let out last night weren't enough to even ease a little bit of this pain I'm currently feeling. I felt like dying already.

I reached the classroom safely. Geez, good thing nothing happened between my walks. I could've fainted or even died while I was walking. Every step I take felt like I'm going to hell. I'll have to face him today but as a teacher. I want to see him if he's fine or did he even go home safely after I left him. But why do I even worry? It felt unfair because I was the one who was hurt and I was also the one who worries. I wonder if he also cried or he spent the night without sleep. But what was I thinking?

I went in and found my friends in their usual places. I quietly went to them, gave them my fake smile and sat in my seat. "So, what's up guys?" I asked, trying not to make my voice falter but I failed.

All of them started to give me worried faces as I tried my best to act like confused. But of course I know them, it was obvious on my face that I'm not okay. Eyes droopy, cheeks puff and a gloomy aura to top that.

"You're not okay, hyung," Jongin stated. Everyone of them nodded and I can't help but to drop my fake smile and slump. And after that, breakdown. Shit. I feel like a girl already. But it hurts and no one cares.

"What happened, Chanyeol?" Junmyeon asked worriedly.

I was thinking of denying but there's no point, anyway. I need help, I need someone who could comfort me. I need them now. "I-I'm hurt." My voice depicted agony and sadness, and I can't help but to cry harder. I wiped off my tears by my hands and hid my face on the chair. The students around me had saw me crying and I don't want them to see me like this. They'll probably have a new headline in the school's newspaper: The very Park Chanyeol, brokenhearted? Gross. But what can I do? I felt like breaking down and it's not like they can stop me.

Moments later of sulking in the chair, I could hear the shuffling of the chairs and the greets of the students but this time, it seemed different. It seemed like they didn't greet Mr. Byun. I started to look up and that's when I realized that we have a new teacher. And that made me clench my fist. How can he do this? He's done too much. I just can't anymore.

I stood up and hurriedly went out the room. I need to breathe. I don't like it there. I ran and ran in the campus, trying to find any release of this anger, sadness, agony, and hurt inside of me. I don't know what to do. I don't care if I'm going to have a detention. I just want to do something.

I felt tiredness linger in me and I panted to a stop. I felt my knees weak and I know I need to find something I could sit within this empty hallway but I found none so I just sat near a wall. I covered my face with my knees and can't help but to cry in there. "Baek... hyun.." I can't help but to tremble. Flashbacks from the park came flashing through my mind. It seems like deja vu but right now it's different because Baekhyun isn't going to be here. I've got nothing to wait for. There's no worth anymore.

I cried harder hoping Baekhyun could hear my agony but I know he can't. Why is he doing this? He told me he loves me. What's wrong with loving someone like me? Am I not enough already?

I suddenly heard footsteps coming near me and I tried to lessen down my sobs but I failed. I just hugged my knees tighter. Please don't go near me but that didn't happen because I could feel that the footsteps stopped in front of me and the person was already sitting next to me. I slowly looked at the person next to me and it was the person that I least expected.

"Chanyeol?" He uttered but I just stayed quiet. He looked as much as like me right now. Was he crying all night too? Is he feeling the way I am feeling right now? The emotions were already mixed up and I felt like I can't take it any much longer. Seeing him right now makes me want to hug him, hold him and tell him how much I love him but instead of doing that, I cried harder and buried my face back on my knees.

I suddenly felt arms that wrapped around me. I looked up only to find out it was Baekhyun's. "Chanyeol, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," he said. Was he sorry for hurting me? Or was he sorry for making me feel like this? But that didn't matter because all I could do was to hug him back tightly and tremble. "Don't... go, please. Just stay."

I could feel him shake too and later on, I could tell he was also crying and it hurts more seeing him cry. I wiped the tears on my cheeks and stopped my cries. I don't want the both of us to be weak, someone should be strong to comfort the weak one. And I know I should be strong for him. Just like how he'd been strong for me. "I love you, Chanyeol," he sobbed, "I really do." I caressed his back to comfort him. "I wasn't thinking, Chanyeol. Loving is not about thinking what will others judge you. It's not about how people accepts you. But it's how the person you love fights for you. And... loving you makes me realize that there's no reason that I should be scared of other than losing you. I love you."

And with those words, I felt jubilant and ecstatic. "D-does that mean anything?" I asked.

He nodded and simply answered, "Yes."

I gave him a look that says, 'What do you mean just yes? Please elaborate it'.

"Tomorrow at the park. I'll do everything to be there," he stated and smiled. I can't help but to roll my eyes, "What if I'll be waiting there for how many hours and-." I haven't got to finish what I said when he cut me with a kiss. It was just a smack but that had a very big effect on me and I felt my heart could explode at any moment. I looked at him who was smiling sheepishly. "Just pick me up at the house," he said after that and walked away, leaving me standing there, still can't move on from the kiss. Goddammit. I really love him.

...

"Are you really hurt?" Junmyeon asked as he sat down and handed us the foods that the both of the leaders ordered.

"You look rather... happy and elated," Jongin remarked.

I don't know what to say anymore but I know I should keep my mouth shut. But I also know I just can't keep my mouth shut when I'm this happy. I feel weird already, when I entered school I was a living corpse and right now I was acting like a living creep already. But as if I care. "I'm already fine. My dog got sick but then my mom said it was already fine," I lied. It felt bad lying to them but what I do for love.

"Dog? You have a dog?" Jongin uttered in surprise.

"Come on, Chanyeol. It's as if we don't know you," Sehun stated, "First, you don't have a dog. And your mom? She's in Japan! Goodness, we're not that stupid. Now, spill the beans!" He demanded. Shit. I know I'm a bad liar. I knew I should've kept my mouth shut.

"I can't just spill," I stated making them knit their eyebrows. "And why is that?" Kris reprimanded.

"Because I've got no beans?" I answered and laughed at my own joke after. Shit. Look at their faces. It was priceless! Damn. Their faces right now was priceless. They looked like they're going to kill me at any moment, right now. Wait. Do they look like they're going to kills me? I think I should stop. "I'm sorry," I said once I recovered.

"Apology accepted," Jongin said with a poker face but I know he's going to pop anytime soon. He's not the type of person who's into seriousness because he don't take things seriously, he's just the person who chills and is seen as a person who does everything for fun and the way he wants it to be. Well, that's Jongin.

Yeah, just as I told you. He's going to pop out anytime soon and he just did. I sighed and shook my head. "Seriously, Chanyeol. What's wrong with you? You're kinda acting different these past few weeks. You're always spacing out, smiling to yourself. And earlier today, you were telling us you're hurt, you walked out on class, missed three subjects, came back with a smile on your face, got scolded by the teacher but was immediately forgiven and right now you're already joking. Now, tell us what is happening to you." Jongin said when he recovered. Woah. That was kinda impressive for that idiot. Didn't know he got that in him.

"That escalated quickly," I remarked and added a chuckle, not bothering to notice that they're waiting for my answer.

"We don't have all lunch for this. We're waiting," Sehun said with his famous poker face. As ever, the Oh Sehun.

"Maybe, I'll tell all of you guys when I think it's already the time to. But I think it's not now," I stated and looked down at my food with a confident smile on my face. I began to eat my food as they followed me too but there's one of them who didn't.

"You're making me more curious. But I'll wait for that time, Park," Yifan said and proceeded to eating. What does that even mean? Should I feel bothered by that or what? Shrugging that off, I proceeded to minding my own food and being happy with my life.

Expect the worst.

Hope for the best.

And let's not assume for ourselves.

...

Hohoho. I decided to make it as Chanyeol's view. It was kinda easier for me to write because I was used to it. But if you're more comfortable at the third person's view, I could also do that. Just tell me.

This chapter is kinda short, tbh. I tried to make it longer but I've got a lot reserved for the next chapter, so expect that the next will be longer.

To everyone who had been supporting this story. Thank you so much. I don't know what to say when I read your comments and you vote for this story. I didn't even expect that it'll reach here. Thank you so much!!

Bye creeps, stay lovely~~

{Twitter account: @havingbaekfast_}