"Come on, you have to go to school."
"I refuse."
"Y/n," my mother said warningly, tugging off my duvet and tossing it to the floor. I was curled up in the middle of my mattress pitifully, weakly grasping out for my shield in the form of a thick blanket. "Seriously. You can't not go to school."
"That's a double negative. See, I'm smart! I don't need school."
Mum was growing annoyed.
"Y/n!" she snapped. I sighed heavily, setting my exhausted, drained gaze on hers. Her face crumpled slightly at the sight of me. "You can't avoid him forever and you're certainly not missing school just because you and Lloyd had a fight."

I closed my eyes and heavily exhaled through my nose.
"I can't face him," I murmured. "I- we-"
"Sweetie," mum said, grabbing my shoulders and claiming my attention. "This will pass. You and Lloyd will be fine. So woman up and go to bloody school before I drag you there by the leg myself."
She stood before quickly leaving the room. I rolled my eyes and sighed.
"Yes, mother."
I lethargically got ready for the day, dragging my body along. I spent last night mostly staring at the ceiling and wondering why I'm such a horrible person. And sleeping, but very very little of it and very very fitful when I did.

I couldn't stand to think of the look on Lloyd's face when we had that fight. He was so angry, so disappointed. But he shouldn't have pushed me. I said that I didn't want to talk about it. And I shouldn't of brought up his age. Of course he's subconsciously embarrassed about it. Why would I think he wouldn't be?
"I really don't want to go on the bus," I murmured to my mum when I was staring at the glass of water in my hand in the kitchen. She sighed, shoving her feet into her work shoes.
"Well, hurry up, then," she ordered. "I'll drive you, but I'm leaving now."
I nodded, quickly discarding my glass in the sink and rushing to finish getting ready. I grabbed one of my old favourite grey sweatshirts.

The drive to school was silent and tense. I could tell that mum wanted to ask me what happened between Lloyd and I, and what happened before that, but she remained quiet. I was somber, staring out the window and watching the city pass.
"Do you have any classes with Lloyd today?" Mum asked.
"Just art and English," I mumbled. 
"Are you going to talk to him?"
I blinked. "No."
Mum's lips twitched at my grumpy tone.
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want to!" I snapped.
"Okay, okay," she chuckled. "I get it. First major fight and all."
"Can we stop talking about it?" I whined. I already had to deal with the loss of my friends - and like hell I'd hang out with the others when Lloyd and I are clearly not seeing eye-to-eye. I was ready for a long, lousy day of solitude (again) and talking about my misfortunes really didn't make me feel any better about it all.

"Sure," Mum said with a huff and pulled up outside the school. "We can stop talking about it right now."
With a roll of my eyes and a scoff from mum, I grabbed my bag and reluctantly made my way into the school.
Being the new kid in general sucks. Everybody wants to know the 'new blood' and clamours to meet them. Being the new kid who came in already dating the most infamous guy in school... well, they took that opportunity.
I wasn't liked. But I wasn't hated. I was held at arm's length, and I didn't really blame them. I'm a horrible person. Everybody but me knew.

Stop thinking like that. But isn't it true? Claire only fuelled the fire - I screwed myself over by distancing myself from my friends. That was my own fault.
And last night, I took it out on Lloyd. He didn't deserve to be treated like that, but I just couldn't stop. It was like a dam, everything just got released and I watched as the force of it all crumbled the only person I needed and loved the most.
I didn't deserve him.
I sullenly grabbed my books from my locker. First class was Psychology, something I enjoyed and was good at - and even better, no Lloyd. I slammed the locker shut.
Now, if I could just get to class without-

"Hey, Y/n."
Fuck.
"Cole!" I grinned weakly as I hugged my books to my chest. I nervously glanced around, hoping to and to not find Lloyd. Or Claire. Or Aaliyah. Or anybody else. "Erm... hi!"
Cole smiled awkwardly, tugging on his long fringe. Ever since he became human again and gained that gnarly, glowing green scar on his forehead, he'd been self-conscious about it, trying to hide it behind his hair. I suppose he wouldn't want to answer questions as to why he had a glowing green scar, so I couldn't blame him.
"I heard about... y'know, the fight."
I blinked blankly. "Which one?"

Cole paused.
"Which... which one?" he echoed cautiously. "Y/n, are you okay?"
"I'm fine," I stressed. "I just- I'm..."
I could feel my breathing beginning to labour and my chest contract. No, not here, not now. Please.
"I- I have to get to class," I stammered, darting around him and ignoring his worried call.
Only to bump right into Aaliyah.
Oh dear lord, have mercy on my poor, unfortunate soul.
Aaliyah looked back at Claire, who glanced me up and down as if she was regarding whether I was worth her time or not.
"Hey, Y/n," she purred. Fuck. "How's your relationship with Lloyd? I heard that you guys had a little bit of a spat over the weekend."
I felt my heart crush.
"How did you..?" I murmured, sinking in on myself. Claire grinned triumphantly and prepared another verbal attack.
"Hey," Cole interrupted, sliding up beside me and fixing Claire with an odd stare. He turned to me. "We're going to be late for Psych. Let's go."
THANK FUCK FOR COLE!!!
"Okay!" I squeaked, shuffling after him gratefully. I was so close to being home free before Aaliyah called out;
"It's a pity really," she begun coolly. "Even Lloyd Garmadork knows he's better than you. And that's saying-"

"Do we have a problem here?" Cole barked, turning on his heel and gently shoving me behind him. A protective older brother vibe surrounded us.
"Cole, let's go," I begged weakly, tugging on his sleeve. "Please. I just want to go to class."
He huffed, hesitating as he contemplated whether to comply or square up. With a final glare sent out at the small crowd, he grabbed my wrist and took off towards the gym.
"What are you doing?!" I asked incredulously as he dragged me behind some bleachers. "We need to go to-"

"What was that?" Cole ordered sternly. I faltered, my complaint dying on my lips. "You're being bullied? And you didn't tell us?"
I couldn't hold his disappointed stare, my gaze wobbling as my lips began to tremble. His face softened.
"You can tell us anything," Cole said softly, placing his hands on my shoulders. "We're family, okay? We all stick together, through thick and thin."
I struggled to hold back a dry sob, sinking into a crouch and holding my face as I willed myself not to cry again. Cole, with a sympathetic look on his face, kneeled beside me and pulled me into a side hug.
"You wouldn't believe how many times I've done this exact same thing with Lloyd," he said gently. "The nicest people are usually the most vulnerable."

"I'm not nice, though!" I exclaimed with a thick voice. "I'm horrible! I'm a terrible person!"
Cole looked taken aback. He leaned away, fixing me with a stern stare.
"Who told you that?"
I paused. Inhaled shakily.
"I- um-"
"Y/n, you're one of the nicest people I know," Cole emphasised firmly. "We all know it. Why else do you think we all love you so much, why did you think that you fit in with us so quickly?"
I went to shake my head again, but Cole bet me to it.
"Being a ninja is about honour, loyalty, morality, patience and kindness," he continued. "The reason why you fit in so well with us is because you already possess those traits! Look at that time that you rescued Kashu from the trap, or when Lloyd got possessed and you refused to stand by and do nothing. Hell, you straight up dissed a teacher for Lloyd's sake and he wasn't even there with you! You put yourself out on the line for him, you've risked your life for him. Y/n, you are not a terrible person. You're one of the best."

I stared at Cole dumbly, mouth open in shock. Tears dribbled from my eyes as I jumped into a hug, sniffling and shakily breathing.
"Thank you," I choked, grateful for his words. Cole immediately hugged back. "I- I really needed to hear that thank you-"
"It's fine," Cole chuckled gently. "You're a good person. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise."
I nodded as I pulled back, wiping my tears away with my sleeve. The bell rang but we didn't care.

"Are you going to talk to Lloyd?"
"Uh- n- not yet..."
"Okay, you need time," Cole nodded. "I totally get it."
I smiled at him weakly. He stood.
"Come on," he said with an encouraging grin. "Let's get to class."

🔔💚🧸
COLE AND READER ARE JUST FRIENDS YOU INCESSANT HOPEFULS.
🔔💚🧸

At least having Cole with me in psych made it easy for the first period of the day.
Unfortunately, the second one was art. With Lloyd.
I ignored the temptation to wag. But... so... tempting.
Woman up, dickface, I scolded myself. Stop running from your problems. You don't run from your problems. You're honourable, loyal, kind... other things that Cole said. Ye.
Besides, mum would get informed that I wasn't in class. I'd much rather face a pissed off Lloyd than a pissed off mum.

For once, I was thankful for assigned seating.
Wait. No. Lloyd's at the table right next to me for fucks sake.
I had never felt so small. I settled at my usual spot after grabbing my planning sheet and inhaled heavily. Lloyd was purposefully busying himself in sharpening a pencil with his back to me. Cool. That's fine. Yes. Sweet.
"Alright," the art teacher whose name I keep forgetting greeted as she entered. "Planning. Remember our goal; to tell a story. You need to come up with a flowing storyline that the audience can clearly see. The story itself can be anything you like involving metamorphosis... well, wait are you waiting for? Get started."

I hummed and stared at my messy planning paper, pressing the end of my pencil against my chin. Metamorphosis. Metamorphosis. What to do about metamorphosis.
My old ideas ranged from the simple, bland life cycle of a butterfly to the evolution of man. Both ideas were turned down.
"Get creative, Y/n," the teacher had insisted (who wasn't actually too bad of a person). "Think outside the box! Try and create a story that's unpredictable, unprecedented. Take the audience by surprise."

Take the audience by surprise. Okay. Easier said than done.
Half the class was already sketching out their ideas on large pieces of paper and, y'know, stress. I tapped the bottom of my pencil on the table as an anxious tick. What to do, what to do?
I glanced up just in time to see Lloyd quickly duck his head in my peripheral vision. I turned my head away and gnawed on my lip. How on earth could I focus when he was so close?

Turns out I couldn't. Another art class period wasted. I was the first one out the door.

For lunch I retreated to the field. It was still warm enough that I could sit out on the grass by myself comfortably. I really didn't want to risk bumping into anybody in the cafeteria.
So I pulled out a book, my lunch and began to read the time away.

📚💚✏️

And there, Lloyd saw her. Nose stuck in a book and headphones in her ears as she sat in the corner of the field, the pinnacle of aloneness.  The content look of concentration as she lost herself in a story of lovers or beasts or both certainly reassured him that she was not feeling lonely, however, and he couldn't help but be entranced by the way her eyebrows furrowed or how the corner of her lips jerked in a split second of a smile or how occasionally she would have to tear herself from the book, hold it against her chest, stare up at the sky and just breathe for a while before delving into the story once more.

He stood at the edge of the school buildings, watching wistfully from afar. Regret curled around the two of them, a symphony of hurt and anger and longing.

With an exhale, Lloyd shoved his hands into his pockets, turning his head away and curling into himself once more as he made his way back indoors.