This chapters title is in honour of the strange mystical Finnish beast known as Harry, love yah always my darling and all powerful Amanda <3

|avocado oaтмeal ѕaтυrday|
|Louis|

|Chapter Sixteen|
5:09pm

"Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow".

There is something just so damn painful about love.

It's a feeling,

A motion,

It's a nonexistent, invisible, partially naked old man with a pointy stick repeatedly stabbing you in the heart while simultaneously complaining about his multiple arthritis.

Antagonizing,

Agonizing,

Tormenting,

Heart-shattering,

Love.

"Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow".

And worst of all, there's no cure,

No over the counter, sketchy guy on the street, black magic, voodoo witchery to make the constant pain go away.

There is something about love that is just so damn painful.

"Ow".

I continued to moan in helpless despair as a figure loomed over my already dark and slightly dramatic state of demise.

"What in the name of all that is soft and fluffy are to doing?" Stevie sung as I peaked up from the tabletop, a red splotch forming just above my temple as I looked at the boy dressed in a rainbow poncho and a pair of open-toed sandals.

"Smacking my head repeatedly into the table until I get new ideas. Ow. Ow. Ow".

The colourfully dressed kid nodded his head as he slid into the booth, reaching across the table and flipping through my notebook, "Writer's block again?".

"Yup. How am I suppose to write a dark fantasy about a bunch of bitchy dragons if I keep thinking about love?" I questioned, hood pulled past my eyes as an empty moan escaped my lips.

"Why don't you just make the bitchy dragons fall in love with the sexually aggressive fairies? Two birds, one pineapple".

I looked up at the ponchoed goof with an arched brow and a mindful of questions.

"You mean two birds, one stone?"

"No, I meant pineapple, can't they both just stare at it in bewilderment? Why do they have to die!".

I never really understood Stevie.

Even though I laughed at his stupid yet accurate ways I never really understood him.

That week he had been dating Cam, a bright, brilliant girl.

One of the best girlfriends he'd had in a long time, but she still wasn't right.

Stevie still had to change,

Change his appearance, change his personality,

And honestly, before he met the love of his life I had begun to forget who he really was.

I smiled at Stevie as a new waiter brought by what was probably a two-day old pot of coffee.

The kid seemed around our age, forced to wear the standard Pepto pink uniforms and checkered apron.

He was nervous, shy, as he reached across us to pour the coffee.

While I wanted to tell the poor guy to breathe my eyes were transfixed on Mickie the possibly eighty-year-old waiter on roller blades hanging up a mounted deer on the wall.

"Why the hell did you guys buy a deer head?" I asked more the universe then the nervous waiter.

"No idea," Stevie shrugged as he smiled at the boy and took a slurp of his coffee, "But it must have been going pretty fast when it hit that wall".

And for the first time in existence,

Someone actually laughed at an original Stevie Jenkins joke.

The raven haired kid threw his head back in laughter, awkwardly cleared his throat, straightened his back and slithered away into the kitchen, a bright red blush staining his prominent cheeks.

Stevie smiled after him, his eyes light and lost in another place as I just looked between the pair, slightly confused.

I think I have an obsession with bad music.

Good bad music though.

I'm infatuated by the hypnotic sounds of Indie, Soul, and people with dreadlocks.

Seriously,

I need help.

But not really.

Lavender Skies by Water Color Weekend

Check it out, it'll make you smile and make you sad all at the same time.

- Sincerely, Avocado Oatmeal Almond? (Sorry, I don't choose the pancake flavors)

"Hey Will!"

It always took me a moment or two to remember.

Will.

Why the hell did I choose Will as my go-to fake name?

Why not Cornelius,

Why not Frank,

Why not Orlando Bloom.

Just, Will.

"You free this week?"

The bubblegum angel hovered over me, blowing pink bubbles, lavender hair pulled up into a high ponytail as she fiddled with the ends of a purple football jersey that reached down to her knees, roughly three times her size.

And what did Loveless Louis Kaede have to say to that?

Nothing.

I blinked blankly, cautiously looking around to make sure that I was the only possible homo sapien she could be talking to.

Slowly finding my way back to reality I smiled, cocking my brow until it became hidden in my disheveled curly hair, "If I did it would be the first time in history that I could actually say I had a social life. Why, what's up?"

Almond flopped into Stevie's seat, her short legs swung up onto the top of the booth as she took in one deep breath,

"So Maddy thought it would be a fuckin' fantastic idea to set me up on a blind date with a total stranger she got recommended from by her brother's ex-girlfriends first cousin. And even though I denied it over a hundred times Maddy can get very scary when you tell her no, I think it's the eyes. I swear they see into your soul. Anyway, she agreed to come with me to make sure I didn't end up in the back of some guy's trunk, or in a murderers shed, or as a part of a world traveling trio of swing dancers," she stated matter-of-factly.

I shook my head and laughed, as she rambled on at about five hundred words per minute, her eyes always grew a bit bigger when she talked fast, her cheeks turned red and she'd tug at her hair.

"Sounds reasonable," I agreed, unable to stifle my smile.

"Anyway, your strange and surprisingly female smelling friend Tommy got us four tickets to some weird and probably illegal Russian circus but since Maddy didn't know she'd actually have to go with Tom and Tom forgot that he was banned from all traveling venues that included clowns, a high wire and/or any animals native to Central America, that leaves me with two extra tickets, and I'm out of breath," she sighed as Mickie zoomed by setting down a suspiciously green looking milkshake that she swiped up and took a big gulp from without a seconds hesitation.

"So, you wanna come?"

She had a date.

With a guy.

And so, alarms were ringing in my head like the Starship Enterprise when the Transporter beam's are down.

No, say no.

I was about to refuse,

But god damn, I couldn't resist that smile.

"Totally, Stevie was once a clown for a week so I'm sure he'd love to go back and relive the glory days".

Al smiled coyly, wiping away a dot of whipping cream from her nose as she looked down into her milkshake, fiddling with the straw and searching its icy green depths for answers, "It's more of a couples carnival actually? Two single dudes on the prowl at a Russian circus might not go over too well. If one of you so much as looks at one guy's honey the wrong way I can imagine an "accidental" elephant stampede taking place, not to mention a bunch of knife wielding jugglers. Come on, I'm sure there's someone who'd love to help you eat five feet of heart shaped cotton candy," she nudged with a smile.

There is, I wanted to say, and I'm looking at her.

"Um, I'm not exactly as smooth as Tommy when it comes to dealing with the ladies but... I might actually know someone who's free... To the sketchy circus we go... I guess?".

| Link to Almond's song in the comments |

One more chapter for you my darlings ❤️

A little more insight into Stevie, I hope :P One day he'll get his own chapter, there's more beneath that rainbow coloured poncho after all.

So, Almond's got a date! But more importantly, who's Louis *cough cough I mean "Will"* gonna take??

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Thanks for reading!

- Sincerely, the leader of the Hotcake Heroines <3

Sorry I just had to add this