Lol yeah ppl who know me know the drill. It's quotes time baby! Istg these quotes feel so canon-

Also the majority of these will contain Gumball, Darwin and Anais. Enjoy!!

~

Banana Joe: *plays shreksophone*

Banana Joe: Woo.

Banana Joe: Time to listen to this on loop for all eternity.

Darwin: ...Genius coping mechanism my friend 

~

Gumball: Plants have feelings too?! What is this? Now I can't have food!

Leslie: You can eat a rock.

Darwin: Air.

Banana Joe: The fabric of time and space.

Tobias: Chugging a bottle of bleach can solve all your problems.

Gumball: You guys are not helpful. 

~

Gumball: Hello, I'm Gumball. I work at a shop now. Here to help. Look, they gave me a badge with my name on it in case I forget it. Very helpful, as that does happen. 

~

Banana Joe: My father's name is just mine as well, so I'm technically Banana Joe Jr.

Darwin: But who comes up when you look up Banana Joe on Google?

Tobias: That's what I thought!

Darwin: One Banana Joe to rule them all!

~

 Bobert: Lol. Heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this.

Alan: What did you do Bobert?

Bobert: a Mistake.

~

Anais: How petty can you get?

Gumball: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

~

 Gumball: Happy October 32nd! Second Halloween!

Anais: That doesn't exist.

Gumball: Not with that attitude. 

~

Gumball: It's nice to be wanted, you know?

Darwin: Not by the law!

~

 Gumball: Firstly, how dare you use mathematics to make me look stupid!

Gumball: I'm actually very good at mathematics.

Gumball: Thirdly, I think you might be right.

~

 Gumball: Darwin, you're my best friend.

Darwin: Best friend? BEST friend?! Bitch, I'm your only friend.

Darwin: I'M THE ONLY ONE CAPABLE OF TOLERATING YOUR DUMB ASS!

~

 Gumball: Thanks for pulling the fire alarm, you saved me from giving an oral report about The Scarlet Web.

Darwin: You were too lazy to read the book?!

Gumball: I was too lazy to watch the movie.

Like father like son frfr

~

Anais: Stop setting things on fire because you're curious about what will happen. What will happen is fire.

Gumball: But what if something else happens just this one time.

~

 Gumball: Go ahead, Darwin. Let it out, cry. If you don't, your tear ducts will get blocked up, and then when you get old, you won't be able to cry.

Anais: Just when we thought it was safe to let you back into the conversation.

~

 Anais: Pick a card, any card.

Gumball: Fine.

Anais: Wait, that's my credit card!

Gumball: You said any card.

~

 Darwin: When was the last time you cried?

Gumball: Uh 15 minutes ago, why??

Darwin: really? That recent?

Gumball: Yeah *voice crack* is that a issue? *starts crying again*

~

 Anais: Any idiot would know that.

Gumball: I knew that!

Anais: See?

~

 Gumball: The best way to gain someone's undying loyalty is by saving them from a perilous situation.

Darwin: So you're just gonna wait until Tobias is in danger and save them?

Gumball: Of course not, I'm going to create a situation that puts them in danger and then save them.

Darwin: ...

Darwin: You're insane. 

 When I saw this quote I immediately thought of the butt slapping episode lmaooooo

~

Gumball: Change is inedible.

Anais: Don't you mean inevitable?

Gumball, spitting out a bunch of pennies: No, I really didn't.

~

Gumball: Welcome to my room. As you can see, I've knocked over many chairs because I get so tilted at the towers.

Anais: Uh, this isn't really tilted. Or a tower.

Gumball: Well you see, it's a gamer pad. Not many girls come in here because I get friendzoned so frequently. But that's okay.

Anais: I'd like to be in the Friendzone! I like friends!

Gumball: It's not as pleasant as you think. They don't treat you like a friend. They treat you like an item. Sometimes I wish I could be more than just an accessory to these women; But unfortunately, as a gamer, I don't get respect.

Anais: I'm not a gamer! so maybe they'll respect me!

Gumball: That just makes you a beta cuck. 

~

Anais: I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan.

Darwin: We could attack them with hummus.

Anais: I stand corrected.

Darwin: Just keeping things in perspective.

~

 Gumball, making a cup of tea: Yeah, get into that leaf juice, you sexy, sexy bee sauce.

Anais: Hey, do you take constructive criticism?

Gumball: I absolutely fucking do not. 

~

Darwin: Everyone thinks I'm this soft cute person but I'm not!

Anais: Darwin, you cried for an hour after stepping on a bug yesterday.

Darwin: It had feelings! It was probably going home to dinner and I killed it!

Gumball: ...It was a bug.

Darwin: It was a BEETLE, and its wife is definitely worried sick, wondering where it is, and I really don't get why you all think I'm so sentimental because I'm not!

Anais: ...

Gumball: ...

Darwin: Stop looking at me like that! 

~

Gumball: I have no respect for Santa. Don't sneak in through the chimney and undermine my authority by bringing my family presents. Walk in through the front door and fight me like a man. 

~

*Something crashes*

Darwin: Shoot-

Anais: *running into the room in a panic* WHAT FELL?!

Gumball: *walking by the room calmly* What died? 

~

Gumball: ...This is one of those moments where it doesn't really matter what I have to say, isn't it? 

~

Gumball: Every zoo is a petting zoo unless you're a coward.

Darwin: I'm worried about you.

~ 

Carrie: Who's in charge here?

Darwin, shrugging: Usually whoever yells the loudest. 

~

Gumball: Can you be quiet?! I'm trying to think.

Anais: Don't worry. Doing anything for the first time is difficult. 

~

Gumball to Anais: First rule of battle, little one... don't ever let them know where you are.

Darwin, shooting out of frame: WHOO-HOO! I'M RIGHT HERE! I'M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O' ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH! Whoo-hoo!

Gumball: 'Course, there're other schools of thought. 

~

Gumball: FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED!

Gumball: BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY!

Darwin: Gumball just threw a tantrum about a chair.

Darwin: I just won Gumball Tantrum Bingo.

~

 Anais: So Gumball, how did your first time cooking dinner go?

Gumball: Pretty good if I do say so myself.

Anais: Oo! Okay, what are we having?

Gumball: Alright, so for appetizers, we have a potato.

Anais: A whole potato?

Gumball: Yes. And then for the main course, we have grilled cheese sandwiches!

Anais: These just look like big slabs of black.

Gumball: Because that's what they are!

Gumball: And then for desert, we have chocolate.

Anais: These are just chocolate chips?

Gumball: They sure are!

Gumball: And then for drinks, we have toast!

Gumball: *lifts up a glass of blended toast* Bon appetite!

~

 Gumball, acting tough: You guys don't want to mess with me.

Darwin: Yeah, Gumball will straight up cry in public. Don't try them.

Gumball: Exactly, I will straight up-

Gumball:

Gumball, tearing up: Darwin, why would you say that?! 

~

Darwin: What's two plus two?

Gumball: Math.

Darwin: ...I will accept that answer. 

~

Anais: There's nothing worse than people using big words they don't understand.

Gumball: I photosynthesize with this. 

~

Alr that's it for now :D

Stay tuned for more if I don't forget about this book!!