The morning comes with a stagnating air, foreboding omens, and a ache in my legs that I know means bad things to come. Still I stretch easing the muscles in my neck, back, and arms for a sense of regularity that is usually commonplace in my own house. Nearby Happy is indulging on a freshwater trout which I can only assume he got from the marketplace last night when I had been preoccupied. It looked like a rainbow, nice and fat but only around five pounds from what I could see.

For myself, I had pre cooked baked beans that would do for breakfast until I could get some more fresh material in the market later. Though I do wish my companion had seen fit to get me something yesterday, but I can't blame him. Honestly he is too cute, and oblivious in the way of good manners.

Sun is pleasant on my skin, temperature grueling for anyone else, but I am extremely accustomed to high temperatures thanks to Dad. So it is in fact a charming change from the colder days of previous, now I can soak in the rays and actually feel the heat on my skin.

Luckily no horrid surprise greats me on my way to the guild, nor when I reach the underlevel. It is less relieving as everyone runs about attempting to predetermine how Phantom will attack next, or who will be involved. How it can be avoided, and allies or S-class mages we could recall for aid. Mystogan being nowhere near, and Gildarts impossible to contact Mirajane does not seem content to sit idle and is attempting to get into communication with them. Cana nearby looking on her cards to see if she could pinpoint any locations of the astray S-classes. Others who aren't panicking are drinking and upset, ranting about in a furious fashion about how rotten their opposing guild is. Mainly this 'job' was taken up by the older generation.

Erza was pacing with her eyes closed, I decide not to disturb her.

Lucy is quiet in the corner glaring at her skirt as if it had harmed her. Grey not far away talking in stoic tones about something boring, clearly trying to clear the poor woman up with a recount of something stupid to have occured in the hall.

Master Makarov was absent, and it bit at my conscious a little to not see him present, the whole guild attempting to function without the soothing comfort of the resident wizard saint. I had hoped that it was merely a weakening spell cast on him, but Gramps is as tough as nails, and if it had knocked him out it would be for awhile. Hopefully the treatment he got would get him out his ill state fast. Knowing the man as I do, I have little doubt that he will join us all eventually as we inevitably challenge Phantom for their actions. No one is comfortable without the old man providing his own type of solidity to the members.

In particular, the weeping woman, Lucy now in the corner clearly guilt stricken and fearful is taken all the proceedings the hardest. A misunderstood self blame that could not be more misplaced. She ran from a home which offered no love or comfort to her, and ended up in a place that did. How was she to know what would occur with her father? The man hiring a guild to find a daughter he had shown little compassion for was strange at best, suspicious at worst. Why suddenly care? Not that it mattered to me, the only impact his odd behaviour had on me was affecting my friend. I couldn't abide by that even if I hadn't man that alone warranted at least two solid punches. Even still, I could not hold grudge to the man completely, he was not responsible for how Phantom handled its jobs and therefore could not have known they would act so brashly.

I just wish Lucy could see that as plainly as I do. I can't provide much in way of comfort, but guilt does no one any favours and only leaves place for more of itself in the future, so I have to do something to ease her mind. After all, she is one of us new or not.

-Jerk that he is, I bet Laxus would disagree. He can be a complete asshole, annoyingly, it's part of the reason why I was attracted to him in the first place. -Lucy wouldn't approve- -

Grey was once more stripping, this time, there was nothing left to the imagination. I notice, without care of my discovery -one does have to remain detached from Grey's various bouts of nudity- that Laxus is far superior in size. Am I comparing? Yes, I am, anything to be better than Grey, even if I do not have much to boast of. At least my boyfriend does and that is victory in itself.

"Your clothes man." Wakaba remarks, unattached as one should be when dealing with a stripper. I don't comment on it, instead I focus on Lucy as I finish my poor attempt to console. A peculiarly effective speech that I myself am proud by as it significantly improves her mood. Smiling even a little as she watches Fullbuster's quick dressing. Which will prove useless in only a few moments, but it still is laughable regardless. A spectacle I will have to recall so that I can tell Laxus of it later, positive he will laugh for a long while as I retell it.

Mind goes sharp at the thought, Laxus could be in danger at the moment and I wouldn't even know as we are so far separated. I want to degrade that way of thinking as the man is more powerful than Erza and more than capable of beating up any foe that challenges him. But his Father from what I am told is not exactly pleasant and should he be the reason my boyfriend had to leave I have more a reason to worry. He figured out I ponder obsessively on one of our outings and told me -while smirking stupidly- to simply remember the first time he kissed me and find joy in it. As there would be many more of those to follow. It was a strangely sweet gesture from a man notorious amongst his fellows for being of cruel quality.

A quaking shook the guild and startled the frenzied people mucking about in their desire to do something and nothing. There was a unusually loud sound of waves against the shore akin to a great force striking at flesh then the eruption of a large gizer. Everyone shifted and froze momentarily in quandure for that was not a resonance common to the local of the hall. There was no hot springs near Magnolia -unless Hargeon can be counted but that is a full train ride away- there was nothing big enough to make such an abrupt sound. With a sense of uncertainty and little caution everyone rushed outside to look out at the water.

A beastly walking castle stood in between them and the view of the afternoon sun. Cana shouted about this being the work of Phantom against everyone's confusion and terror, instigating an immediate reaction from all present. Battle stances and magickal sigils began to appear almost as soon as she had finished her sentence. Erza stepped forward before all of them making herself a wall between them and the threat on the horizon. I had to wonder privately if this was a card only a Darkened Guild would use. Voice cascaded out from the structure as a horrible resounding boom, the nastil tone of their master Jose demanding the surrender of Lucy Heartfilia else the consequences will be severe. Obviously no one took him up on his threat, and instead in return to the demand magic stuck at the stone castle

They have some serious courage to do what they have, that or they are simply the dumbest guild to have ever crossed Fairytail. The demands, the threat, the blatant act of instigation, injury to their members all to get some money. It was more then disrespectful, it was a disgusting disuse of power. The fact that they targeted someone I like and consider a friend is only extra reason for me to kick them into a burning pit using nothing but my hands and some good old hard work.

Peculiarly there is a hesitance as then fire burns within. Anger coiling in a way I know all to well by now at the base of my stomach, ready to showcase power as I dismantle their operation. Hesitance is not something I am accustomed to feeling prior to a fight, maybe after a really long and tiring day, but it hasn't been. Then in a moment of clarity it occurs to me: I don't want to dive into battle. Is it because of letting myself go last night? Saying what I did, about longing for a chance to be more than a fighter, yet here I am again. Gearing up to destroy a foe alongside my guild. Maybe it isn't the lack of desire, because I love the thrill of adrenaline and will for as far into the future as I dare to look, maybe it is in conflict with my wanting of self identification.

In order to do well though, I have to push all that aside. Thinking through an obstacle has never helped me in combat.

I let my instinct mull my thoughts. I wonder how fast I can beat in Gajeel's stupid pierced face.

The wounded drone onwards, nursing their injuries and ordering alcohol to dull the ache in their limbs from the long lasting conflict. No fatalities is cause for celebration as well as Master's recovery and the defeat of our longest standing rival, but I want to celebrate in a completely opposing way to getting smashed on ale and whiskey. Unfortunately the only one who can help me wind down in that fashion is half way across Fiore.

I could, if I wanted try to find a one night stand, but I can't stand lady parts and I don't want to risk trouble with the council. Not to mention the death that would no doubt occur to the one I choose, given my boyfriends rather firm and unyielding position of 'no one looks at him, no one touches him,' that I've heard said many times in reference to me. Honestly if I hadn't I wouldn't consider Laxus a possessive man, not appearing as the type. But I know for certain that he is, and that is more hot then I care to speculate.

The sex alone is enough to get him at least marginally jealous. But there is no point in even attempting to seduce -not that I'm very good at it in the first place.- When there are so many restrictions baring me, and a lack of a possessive jerkoff of a boyfriend around. So I can settle for a warm cup of ale -which Mira allows for us younger generations after a hard time, and if we get drunk well then its penense for drinking to much when to young as she says.- Cana is the exception, already drinking from the barrel and showing no signs of slowing even as her bikini gets soaked through and turns purple. Grey is comfortable sleeping off his exhaustion in the corner of the basement, completely nude. Elfman is challenging other men to arm wrestles when Mira comes up to him and accepts he makes a hasty retreat. Loki is pensive in a corner playing with his ring, but smiling all the same when others go up to speak to him. Erza I think best to stay away from, knocking over her special strawberry cake equals nothing but long lasting pain, knowledge I have gained from experience. Master is gazing at everyone with half closed lids -maybe near sleep. Lucy is next to me eating a small amount of food and smiling fondly at the countertop, her hand making staggered little movements like writing on a paper. Happy nurses a fish that had been given to him by Alzack of all people. Who is speaking quietly in a corner with Bisca oblivious to some members murmuring amongst themselves about an upcoming wedding.

I look back away from it all to the bottles on the self, the atmosphere was light, but it reminded me of mine and Laxus's first meeting. Where a bar brawl ended with one man on the ground and I drinking a large mug of milk while a large stranger gazed at me from the counter sipping his mead.

I feel Happy land casually on my head, warm and soft, purring slightly in contentment. I can't help but agree, it's relaxing not having to worry. Plus being a cat must be a pretty nice avidue of existence.

" 'least Lucy seems to get along with everyone now." I hear him add out randomly, and because it is nice I smile wide even if its only for myself. "Hey Natsu?"

"Yeah buddy?" Because Happy is sweet and I don't give him enough.

"I like Lucy, even if she is heavy. She's one of us right?"

"Yeah bud, she's one of us." I feel him nod against me, and snuggle a little into my hair before getting up and flying over to the topic of our conversation. Watching as Lucy smiles as Happy flies over, and Levi joins in a conversation between them involving much laughter and yelling. I am unwittingly joined by Maccou, who really shouldn't be here, but is lucky as Romeo is visiting his mother. He sets his glass of bourbon near me, and casts a coy smile in the direction I had previously been looking.

"So..." He starts, and I know its a start, because Igneel did that exact tone of voice once when about to lecture or mock me. It must be a thing all Fathers know how to do. "Lucy is a rather good looking woman ain't she?" There it is, well timed, and oh so not what I wanted or could bare to hear. I know how he expects me to answer, maybe a blush or a fierce denial, maybe even an agreement. But I give nothing, because yes she is, but clearly this isn't about physical beauty, its about male and female attraction. I know that. I don't care to venture further or encourage his imagination anymore then it spins itself. He was after all, one well known amongst the ladies as a womanizer finding a thrill in the opposite sex that many cannot come close to matching, Wakaba being much the same.

Romeo either had a tall reputation to uphold or a ironclad legacy to dismantle. I am not sure which as he is too young to make any sort of guess as to what sort of man he will be. His father however, is one keen on proving himself correct in the assumption that I am attracted to Lucy. Truthfully, I don't know how to disarm the notion without outing myself or being patronizing in some form to the woman. Neither is my goal, but with my own clumsy tongue I'm bound to do one or the other, and well... One of the choices does put me on a quick journey to the afterlife so it is a relatively easy choice. Be oblivious.

"Huh? Oh yeah, hadn't really noticed." I strug while taking a sip of ale, at best it was a commonality with my brash nature, at worse an insult to Lucy's entire appearance. Maccou visibly choked on his bourbon as he leveled me with complete bafflement. Wakaba, having overheard joined in with even more squinted eyes then normal. His smoke broken voice sounding high above the others in the guild, even if by character he wasn't a loud man.

"Natsu, you have coal for eyes? Not noticing a pretty girl like that, 'otta be a crime. Even for you." I ignore the crack, pretending not to have noticed it as I focus more squarely on the fact that many eyes are now on our conversation, staring in curiosity. The group in which the topic of our conversation resides also fixating deep brown eyes on us. I groan grabbing my head, the situation was already shitty. Maybe if our basement wasn't so small, and the rest of the guild wasn't a pile of rubble I'd have a suitable place to hide.

"Yeah Natsu, c'mon, no need to be shy." Was that the general opinion, then fine, eat at my pride as it may, its better than the alternative, I'll let them think what they want. Best not to respond, I'll let the rumour go, even if it ends with the conclusion that I have an attraction to Lucy in a romantic or even sexual nature. It was bound to happen anyway with how we interact. I seek her company, she looks for mine, we take jobs, we eat together all that stuff, enough for a solid speculation to form. Not to mention the fact that I have seen her naked, which was an accident, and obviously didn't do anything for me. Anyone of sane mind however, would think that there is something laying under the surface, I just don't think they expect it to be in the form of my very much hidden sexual orientation.

Mira is the first after the grizzled males to hop along. Sweet as she may be, she is the Queen of gossip -being the barmaid helps in that regard- and any slice she can get is music to her ears. She is also exceptionally fond of romance scandals. Prying her ears out for whenever I get mentioned, I know for certain she has been dying to set me up with some hot chick, I know, because Elfman whinged about it awhile back.

"What you guys talking about?" The smile hides her wicked intent. The sugar voice a deep seated evil lurking in the shadows waiting for opportunity to pounce.

I answer: "Nothing really." Bland as I can, but my response is overcut by Maccous's laughing and louder voice.

"Just how Natsu has the hots for Lucy." There it is, banging my head on the table is so tempting, that I only manage to not repeatedly smash my forehead in by the mere fact it would make the statement appear true. A (un)pleasant grin spreads on Mirajane's cheeks, as she turns to me with clasped hands. I'm really no good at playing aloof, not naturally, so I take my cues from Grey, its one thing the stripper does with a practised ease that I cannot. I sip at my ale, and try to remain unattached from the talking going on around me, or Mira's hovering and searing eyes, I also avoid Lucy's gaze and stare distractedly at the bottles to the right of her.

I can fight a hand-to-hand combat spar, take down a fellow dragonslayer, rescue a damsel in distress -be that man, woman, or child,- but I cannot, nor have I ever been able to face my greatest foe. Social expectations and personal questions. In this situation, though it would normal have my pride screaming and thrashing to admit; I would give nye anything to have a hero save me -in the form of Laxus preferably, but anyone will do at this point.

To my horror, before I can escape and break away from the untruths the other's are reaching. Erza stands.

Her poise calm and collected, but I see the glee in her eye and it makes me want to run rather then attempting to slyly remove myself. I know Erza, I have known her nearly all my life, and she -as Mira- is inclined to attach herself to potential matchmaking should the opportunity arise. Worst off, with her, I will not be able to refuse without an accusation that I am insulting a woman's honour. My one hope resides in Lucy's ability to stop the situation before it escalates, or decline me without prompt here and now. I do not want to hurt Lucy's feelings or shame her especially publically, but I also don't want them to think I am interested. Or for the attempts of matchmaking to begin, if Evergreen was here she would be right alongside the other terrifying females now smirking ever so slightly in mine and Lucy's directions.

Maybe if I scream really loud Happy will get the message to get me the hell out. But I have never screamed in my life and I was not going to start here and now.

-Well, never screamed in fright I should clarify. Because no doubt if Laxus were here he would see fit to correct me with his smug look; reminding me of that one time we met up in Crocus and I screamed at the top of my lungs during sex. Which also happened to be the same day the headboard of that bed got two large gashes in the wood, and Laxus got some terrible splinters, coincidentally.-

"Man up Natsu! I real man would not be afraid to tell a woman of his feelings!" So says the man unable to admit he is scared of his older sister.

"I should be getting home." I say, because I need an excuse, as a certain red haired woman has no issue strapping me down if necessary. "I'm really sore from the battle, and Happy needs to rest too." I don't add 'I also need to go drown myself in the river while I'm at it.' That, goes unsaid as many of the males and some other women in the guild understand the hidden meaning of my wanting to hide. They, wisely, don't say anything. At least I'm not entirely lying, anyone can see how Happy is attentive wanting to listen, but also half-asleep.

Exiting into the pile of rubble outside is harrowing, disheartening as memories ingrave even the stone of the now ruined hall. Crying won't return it to normal, so I don't bother with the prickle at my eyes, and if one drops down, well there's no one but a feline unconscious on my head to see it.

I know that if I don't come up with some kind of plan, I will be screwed over tomorrow as the demons descend. I include Lucy in that depiction as well, no doubt she'll want to know if only to be informed, or for the boast of ego.

Tomorrow is not something I look forward too.

I wake to a clattering, shattering, and generally smashing noise. Which has me bolt upright in a matter of moments, not many can enter my cottage uninvited, and anyone who tries usually finds themselves with a foot to the face. Surprisingly its already day, the sun has clearly been awoken for awhile now, and Happy is nowhere to be found. Which either has to do with whoever is inside or the fact that the guild doors will already be open. I look over my shoulder, and stop breathing.

I hadn't thought I was dreaming, but I suppose I am considering there is no possible way my boyfriend can be standing inside my house at this moment. Nevermind appearing bored and slightly contrite. "I didn't mean to wake you, I was just-" My body works on its own, and I spring on him, wrapping both my arms and legs around his tall and bulky frame without hesitance. Because that's his voice, and his scent, and his energy I feel. I acknowledge the annoyed grunt he gives as the sudden weight of my smaller person is attached to his own, but I don't remove myself, I cannot bare too.

I have never been clingy, so this is obscure to both of us, but I don't think he minds seen as he is holding me close as well. Breathing in deeply near my neck as I take in his scent in turn. Feeling small compared to him has never felt so justified or right, no matter what pride or masculinity has to say on it. I enjoy, relish being smaller than him, it makes it so much easier to hold him. Kind of him to hide the fact that he loves the fact that I am shorter than him, but entirely wasted.

He groans into my ear, I feel the rumble in his chest. It makes me chuckle to know that someone of such rigid control and emotion can be so affected by me. "I missed you so much." He admits, almost too quiet to hear. His hand is tight in my hair, but its not as if I'm not used to pain, and I don't dare complain because I know it will be over quickly as is his ability to deny himself.

Do I want to hold him longer? Yes, but he puts me down, and I must accept that, he is not a very physical man unless it involves intercorse. As is his own important rule he doesn't use his hands to touch other people unless he is in combat -or banging me into the mattress. Simply speaking only fun activities.

He turns to my megar kitchen where I see eggs and bacon cooking and something flutters deep in my chest. Mostly I ignore it, but I do lean up to kiss his cheek, which he accepts with a -supposed to be- hidden pleased grin. Let it be known that Laxus is far from a good cook, but neither am I, and he is better than I, and truthfully I love how he cooks bacon. Best I've ever tasted.

As such I eat almost all of it before I realize that he might not have eaten, the crunch and softness of the meat made me forget. I shift my eyes to him, feeling guilty, he shakes his head and instead focuses on my house. He had never been here before after all. Magnolia was near a foreign land to him, his Father -and Guild Master- had never allowed him to take jobs nearby for some reason. Maybe it is the quaintness of the cottage that he is looking at, but it makes me slightly subconscious that there is so much mess strawn about from me and Happy in equal measure.

"Not that I'm not glad your here, but why are you here? I thought you weren't allowed." There's a snort from my closet, which he is apparently ransacking! I move to punch him but before I can he whistles lowly at my very well hidden collection of more sexy apparel. It was purely for me! Sometimes I need to feel more sensual then I am! Of course he finds it interesting, he would. I settle for a harsh kick on his back which does nothing to someone of his stature. He does laugh a little at the action as he holds up the dark black pair and caresses them with his fingers. Weirdo.

"I bet you look great in these." I make a grab for them and he dodges, presumably so he can continue to strangely caress them.

"What about Ivan, won't he be angry that you came to Magnolia?"

"Do you have a red or white pair?" He asks, seeking.

"Laxus you'll get in trouble, and I don't want him to-"

"FUCK HIM ALRIGHT!?" Instinctively I rear back as he shouts, thunder resounding as a result of his escalated emotion, and it shocks me. A caution I don't normally feel around anyone springing forth in my chest. Anger no where present, only shock stands resolute. He looks much the same as I feel for a moment before he drops the lace and grabs at my right hand gently. "I- I shouldn't have done that. I know you're just worried about me. But I came to see you to avoid him, and I just want to keep him off of my mind. So can we please, not talk about him?" Far be it for him to apologize, but saying please is almost just as rare, so I let it slide because he's trying. I understand only because I understand him, knowing he is already eating himself up over the outburst.

"Its okay Laxus. Everyone loses control sometimes." He's sensitive about it, I know, he likes being the personification of self-control and confidence, usually he is. Yet he punishes himself over the smallest things when it comes to me that I worry for the day where I get hurt near him and he can't do anything. He blames himself to easily, thinking himself as my protector when I cannot defend against a threat -which he knows is rare at best.- "Really, I was just shocked." His visage pervays self-loathing, and it's so very ugly on him. But he dips his frown lightens minutely at my megar reassurance. "Now! C'mon! I'll show you 'round Magnolia! I know all the best spots!" I can afford to be absent for one day after all. Besides I know there is only doom awaiting me in the remains of the guildhall. Even if it is exposed seen as the underlayer had to be closed for repair to the entire building.

He gets up from his station on the floor, and I take his hand in mine. As far as everyone in the guild is concerned I'm in love with Lucy, and the people of Magnolia think I am a complete idiot due to my supposedly pyromantic nature. Not to mention ignorance works to our favour, certainly everyone is straight in their perfect corner of the world, allow them to think that, because I can hold my boyfriend's hand in public without anyone being the wiser. Or we can hide our interlocked fingers under Laxus's large leather coat if we need to.

The day is sun filled and warm despite the cold breeze blowing in from the north. Being as he is by upbringing a stoic man, his face is stone, and due to height and genetics -I assume- intimidating as hell. Making all those who would look closer steir clear, and by the presumption that a man like him couldn't possibly like men -after all everyone knows gay men are slim white youth.- So we were as safe as two gay men can be in an area of heteronormative belief.

He is so warm, and all I can think of is the manner in which my lover holds me at night, and I pray for but a moment, that Laxus should not leave for a long while.

I don't expect him to get on with the good people of my hometown, nor indeed my guildmates holding far to a lightened mindest rigid in its assurity, and though I find him to be far different even accepting then most, I know that Laxus does not agree with the mindset held by most law abiding guilds. For me, he holds his tongue when I get a little to ricious, not that he is afraid of sharing his opinion, but there are some things that couples simply cannot agree on no matter how devoted and well oiled the relationship. Being that is it were, not even I who has spent all my life -most- under the eye of a wizard saint can't agree wholeheartedly with the ideals upheld.

Peppered around are familiar faces, I should have expected as much as the guild was forced to recreate outside completely. Though it seems like their is a repair job in progress, I vere away before they can see me slacking around. The beach is where we end up, and I can't help but take off my shoes as to feel the burning warmth of the sand on my feet, Laxus doesn't follow my lead, but he doesn't say anything in judgement either.

Steel cast eyes resting firm on the remains of my hall. "What happened?" Gesturing to the dismantled castle standing just a little off the shore. All that is left of the Phantom Lord guild, besides the astray people who had once been its members. To an outsider it would look like well, I'm not sure, but it can't be a good impression.

"Phantom attacked, and we beat 'em." I say, because it wasn't very complicated to wizards especially dark ones as my lover who is so accustomed to wars between guilds it could be cited as one of his credentials. Proving this he didn't react other then wrapping his arm around my shoulder, bringing me close, no concerns of appearance as no one was near. Under his coat is like an extra layer of sun to warm anyone underneath, of course, only he and I will experience such a luxury. "Oh, and my entire guild now thinks I'm in love with Lucy." I mention, because its damn annoying, and ridiculous and he of all people would understand that.

"Oh yeah?" He asks, strangely high spirited sounding, and amused at the same time. Pitching his voice in that special way he does only when he thinks something is stupid, but in it there is an air of confidence behind that I am unsued to.

"Stupid old men.... Got Mirajane on it! Oh! And Erza too!" Frightening. "Whole damn guild is gonna be playing matchmaker." He laughs, airily.

"Lucy... Thats the blonde chick you met in Hargeon right?" We stop, facing each other, but he is smiling at me, and the momentary worry I feel dissipates as mist from the air. He looks so natural with the rays of sun glimmering down on his hair and illuminating it, casting a shadow down his ragid scar and making his eyes appear blue and orange.

"Yeah! I thought you weren't listening when I mentioned her! Jerk!" Because I can, he isn't affected, the insult has lost any type of edge, and maybe it never had any to begin with. He indulges me with a brief snort of laughter, not bothering with the real thing. "Then Elfman decided I needed to be a 'real man' and confess my feelings to her." This time he questions with raised eyebrows. "Don't ask where it comes from, no one knows. But he can't talk, he's afraid of his own sister even though she forsook her magic a long time ago."

"Why forsake your own magic?" It was a common question for Mira, and I didn't completely understand it myself, but I know it had to do with Lisanna's death. That had hurt and left empty something in my mind when I thought about it. I know Mira well though, and despite her best self, she had never managed to fully recover.

No matter how much I trust him, I can't tell him anything without Mirajane's permission, it would be wrong. "Guess she just didn't want to be part demon anymore." I answer instead because it was possible, even though it was completely false. For his part Laxus had one of the best reactions I have seen in awhile.

He swallowed after a set of rapid blinking, and breathed deeply. "Right." And continued walking after figuring I wasn't bluffing. Tucking me a little further against his side, as if I needed protecting against some sort of invisible beast, even though we are both well aware that I would probably find a way to attack it before it got to me. One had to learn to accept that no matter how aware Laxus was of mine own abilities and strength, he would always at least attempt to shelter of protect me from harm. It was just... him to try, even if I hated it slightly. At least I have the comfort of knowing that it wasn't on the bases that he thinks me weak. In fact it is of his deep compassion for me that he does so, and for that reason, and that alone, I can accept his protective nature. Now, it is even a little cute, and makes me giggle to consider, not that he can ever be made aware of that.

"Show some damn shame!" A woman shouts from the docks. Her face older and hair greying, a small child on her arm and she guide's their face away from them. I want to be angry at her, mad at her disposition, but, there she is right in a way, there is a child watching and if nothing else I can prove that I am not evil by leaving their mother alone, and ignoring her stupid comments. Moreso, the irritation of having been spotted for something as simple as an embrace is more than a little infuriating. Beside me, Laxus just shrugs her off, and walks away with me under his arm, uncaring of her opinion. Because nothing could mean less to him, though he does look to the young kid behind her and smiles peacefully. Watching him, I can't think of him as anything but the best of people, no matter what the Council, or the law says about dark origins or people of our inclination. Hopefully the young girl can see what I see. We walk away and I feel a moment of dizziness, at the magnitude of emotion arisen within me. "Wait! Aren't you Salamander?"

I flinch.

Laxus hults in his steps, allowing me to take control of the situation. Knowing of my own weakness for conflict, in the manner in which I can never seem to ignore it I suppose he suspects me to engage her. It was not out of want not to that I pull his coat over myself. Recognized or not, provocation or not, there are fights that I do not want to engage in, there was a child behind her, she was a citizen, a million reasons. Of course, that is my reasoning for huddling myself under the large leather coat hanging precariously from my boyfriend instead of doing what he so expected.

It is possible for me to try and stop fighting, at least until I figure myself out a little more, so that my most prominent character trait isn't my violence.

Following my lead with his larger frame Laxus moves forth both of us not bothering with the middle-aged woman. The tight cramping sensation in my chest lessens a little, though I have no explanation for why it had happened in the first place.

"I should go to my guild..." The whisper comes out unbidden, and I instantly regret it. I don't want to be without Laxus for some stupid, sentimental shit. I don't want to think about my state of mind. I know that astray comments don't bug me not when they're directly inflicting me. Was it because she was insulting him as well as myself that made me feel so... insecure? Nervousness was not a feeling I had a normal interaction with, in fact I could say I have only felt it enough to understand what it is like.

He sighs above me and I only just manage to refrain from grasping at his forearm to keep him in place. He stands tall once more, and I had almost forgotten he needs to slouch down in order to properly reach me. "You should go to your guild then." He says simply, and I want to argue with him that I shouldn't but it would be mute point anyway as I was the one who said as much. He seems to sense something, my reluctance I assume, because he looks casually around and bends forward, kissing me more then chastely. The warmth leaves quickly no matter how hard pressed the kiss was, and I stand slightly shocked for a moment, before I feel myself grinning up at him.

In a haze of joy, I pull at his coat slightly were I less than high off of endorphins I wouldn't have even considered it.

"Can... Can I wear you coat for awhile?" He would be in Magnolia for a little bit anyway so it wasn't like it would be a long time. I can barely see the way his eyebrow rises, but I do, even still I know somehow that he will allow it this once.

As soon as I think that he shrugs off the garment and carefully drapes it over me. Needless to say it almost drags on the cobblestone. Our height difference has always been somewhat of a problem, as well as an inside joke between as, laughing at how I couldn't reach his face with my hands without standing on my toes. So the dwarfing of the coat on me was no surprising, even though it was worth it just to here Laxus laugh for but a moment. I put my arms through the sleeves because it was less likely to fall off this way. I wonder if I look ridiculous, but then, I don't actually care either way.

"I'll see if I can find some decent ingredients for dinner. I'll see you later." I wave as he moves in the opposing direction. But he pauses for a moment and looks at me with a sly smile. "Don't get into too much trouble."

"Hey!" Maybe my indignation was false, but it was honestly just too good to have him around to waste being mad at his stupid taunting.

Hopefully Erza won't murder me upon coming into the guild -so to speak- after all, I was expected at least an hour prior to now.

As I presumed, she spots me instintly, casting a dark aura over my very mood in fear factor alone. I back away a little, submission is necessary with her if you don't desire to be killed -at least when she's in a bad mood. She stops suddenly for some reason. Focusing on my head-to-toe figure.

"Did, did you get a new coat?" Forgetting that no one had met Laxus, nevermind seen me wear any type of warm clothing was a gross oversight. Even if it is a little warmer then a fire mage needs -nevermind a dragonslayer of the same element- but I wouldn't take it off and risk it being stolen or the comfort it provided if only subconsciously. But that left the questions from my family that I am unprepared to answer competency.

Grey turns the corner, he wastes not a moment. Because of course he doesn't, laughing instantly as soon as he sets his sights on me and my new fashion. "Where the hell did you get that piece of junk?" Defending Laxus's coat I punch him square in the jaw. Its not mine, but I honestly love this coat, its special, I am not going to let the gross stripper discount it. Quickly recovering I gain a dirty look before he snarls and slams his head into my own, which I meet with equal force a dull pain resonates, but I'm so used to it when fighting Grey it feels like a mere bump on the hand.

"At least I actually wear clothes!"

"Well I didn't spend the day shopping instead of helping my guild repair! Where do you get off?!"

"I wasn't shopping!"

"Explain the coat then moron!"

"Make me!" We didn't get a chance before Erza grabbed both of us by our hair and forced us apart, which is far more painful then a simple headbutt with Grey as it actually stings a little.

"That's enough!" She near yells giving us both a fierce look for having interrupted the workflow and nearly starting a brawl in the construction site of the new hall I imagine. He backs down before I do, which is ashame, because he deserves a good thrashing for what he said about my man- Laxus's! Coat. Making jokes about the coat is basically insulting the blond's honour according to him, or something like that, I wasn't really paying attention at the time. Unspeaking, Ezra points at some stone to be moved and a collection by the otherside being built into a wall by Elfman. Taking that as my cue to leave, I might've said something about fighting Grey because I got a powerful pinch on my arm by the weaponized woman.

The stone is heavy, even by stoneblock standards, and I have to wonder if its for fortification or just to avoid undue damage that Master bought such a heavy brand. Knowing him it was just to laugh while we toil. I try not to think about that, I know Gramps isn't in the best health and due to his fall and illness because of Phantom he probably shouldn't help out.

"Man, I though Grey was kidding when he said you were shopping." The only Strauss male said, not looking to me as he applied another stone onto the growing wall. "So unmanly..." Not fighting is harder then I thought. Saying that is just insulting to everyone involved.

But its made easier by the fact that I have to push the sleeves all the way to my shoulders un order to lift each rock.

There is a makeshift gathering/cafeteria area nearest where the main hall had been. Apparently the bar had survived because as usual Mira stood behind offering each person a glass of something to ease their muscles after all their hard work. The barmaid with a lively smile as was her staple, and making the more glum persons smile a little.

Slightly hesitant in cause of my absence this morning -and most of the afternoon, I near where Mirajane is, hoping for a quick bite to eat. Master is sitting on the counter nearby and nursing a mead, not yet drunk. Cana is begging for some alcohol -and being ignored as I am spotted by the deep blue eyes first.

"Oh hello Natsu. Glad you joined us." A moment later she blinked. "Oh my, that's quite the fashion statement." There was no attempt to hide her amusement, although, to be just, I probably look quite strange. At least I can take comfort in the garment, the brief confrontation with that woman really caused my nerves to go into overdrive and that hasn't happened in a very long time. I remember, the last time I was confronted with a break of mind was when Laxus had asked me on a date. Which had ended in a disaster -well in a sense.-

To glance around its not difficult to understand that the design is vastly different from the one I had grown up with, its... almost uncomfortable.

The unfamiliarity doesn't seem to affect anyone but me, and as result my eyes search for any sign of uncertainty in my comrades, but there is nothing. Which I consider to be unbecoming yet relieving as it may simply be my own attachment. I garner some uncomprehending looks, and Elfman I know is fiercely holding his tongue, which is appreciated, though the pierced visage is nearly not worth it.

The evening brings a cold breeze, and the coat blocks it out as inconvenience. No wonder Laxus loves this thing so much.

"So what is with that shit you call a coat?" Finally Grey, regains the question he wanted to ask before Erza had called a ceasefire, and my irritation spikes. Its not a strange thing to wear clothes! But of course the stripper who doesn't even enjoy wearing them like the rest of us would make a point to draw attention to something thats not all that strange.

"None of your business frost for brains." It isn't as if I owe him an explanation.

"What you say?!" He seems to think the opposite, which is irritating enough. Could the guy not focus on something else?

"You heard me!" Once more, anger froths in my chest, and I see a tinge of crimson at the corner most of my vision, hells rage igniting once again, and I don't know if that was something I wanted anymore or not. Someone stands before either of us can start a brawl, although it does look like even with sore muscles the most active members are raring to go. It turns out to be Alzack.

"C'mon guys let's not start anything, we're still rebuilding." Nearby as she always is, Bisca nods. I can see his logic, as can Grey, we both back off with a mutterance. "Seriously though Natsu," I look to the black haired man, he's giving me a simple gaze nothing more than kindness in his soft face. "What's with the coat?" Obscurely, I feel my face and ears heat, a blaze lit underneath them. I don't know how to respond, clearly, I can't state the truth, it would be really stupid, but I wish I could to an extent. Hiding my love for people has never come easy, I enjoy being emotional, and connecting with others, I like being able to say that I found that precious thing that individuals look so hard and long for. Its unfair that I cannot.

Alzack could admit to Bisca, but he is simply to shy, dettered by the fact she may reject him, and leave their comfortable partnership. But the fact is, he can say that he loves her without... ridicule, shame, or glances of distrust. Not wondering how his friends think of him, because we are all aware of his affections. That's not something people like me have the luxury of.

They wouldn't understand either.

I say nothing, and my silence has my lips feeling glued together.

A plague of silence sweeps across the guild, no one is adapted to me not retorting to something I suppose. I just don't want to get angry at every inclined insult thrown my way. However, to the guild, it must be something of a personality shift.

Its rare for home, to feel so unwelcoming.

I back away. The atmosphere of curiosity mixed with bubbling bewilderment, and judgement is stuffling, and finding my boyfriend amongst all of Magnolia is beginning to sound far more appealing than staying and letting events unfold before me.

I don't really know how describe what it feels like. I don't really understand my own emotions most of the time.

But. Its as if in a place of comfort and family, of familiarity and understanding I am an outlier. A sickness or wrong that is infesting the space and creating only desimation. Fitting, as that's what I do anywhere I may roam. Never have I felt so unjustly.... Wrong, abnormal, and strange surrounded by people I have known all my life.

I'm abnormal here amongst normality.

Everyone within my guild has the proper viewpoints, the correct way of life, and I am the sick one within their ranks, tarnishing them.

I don't feel human like them. I was raised by a dragon, and maybe thats it. But, I don't understand them, maybe I never have. The Magic Council has laws, traditions, customs and expectation of wizards that are strictly upheld. I don't understand them, for all of me, I cannot comprehend them.

I know I am a person, but I wasn't made to think like them. Girls, women, I've never even thought that way because I knew I couldn't. But I should. They, Fairytail thinks I do.

A lier,

A sinner,

An abnormality.

I have never done it before. Never turned my back on something terrifying but-

I run away.

It doesn't matter they all think I hold feelings for Lucy, it doesn't matter that it was a simple question that had my thoughts wheeling out of control. It doesn't matter that as I ran I heard them calling me back, and the tears going fast and painful down my cheeks.

It doesn't matter because the only things that I know about myself, the things that aren't anger or temperament, continuous hunger and ability to fight, the only things that aren't obvious, that I know of myself, I can't tell anyone. Not even my family nor my friends, people I trust with my life- but not with me.

I run so fast away that my legs hurt and I have a stitch in my side once I reach my house. The coat sliding off my shoulders is enough to make me feel more insecure. Its worse, because I have never felt like this before. So strange and unnerved, scared.

I hear Laxus come up the hill, and I know its him because his scent lingers in my nose. I don't dare turn around, he's seen me cry, he saw me cry not long before, but I still don't want to face him like this. Feeling so weak and unsure. Maybe he understands, maybe he can feel it as without a word he holds me to him, and the affection is soothing from my own inner conflict. I feel his chin on my head, and know that he is using the hill to get smaller. No matter how unsure, there are things I know. One of them:

"I love you Laxus." He shifts above me leaning weight just a little onto me.

"You remember what you said a few nights ago?" I recall, considering it had been on my mind for the past two days, unrelenting, and causing me to act in a manner uncommon for myself, I know he thought it was strange, I remember the pained expression all too well, it had been ingrained.

I never want to see that... Look on him again.