•LOST GOLDEN RING•

Gold ring with glowing Elvish writing on it. Has been in the family for 3 generations.

If found, please return to a stranger you've never met before at 254 Barad-dûr Street, Mount Doom, Mordor.

Note: please ignore the huge eye above the castle, that's fake. You would've never met me before. Ever. In your whole life.

Like, ever.

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Nice try, Sauron.