sudden shift

I feel a shift in the system,
I can't fully explain it,
But it is like my body knows,
It aches and shivers,
Whenever it sees something different,
It senses something that I can't see,
I'm not sure if I'm overthinking this,
But I can point out the littlest of things:
The changes in attitudes.
The changes profiles.
The changes in content.
The changes in mood.
I can sense a shift in the system.
I don't know what to expect either.
Things can be so peaceful for me,
In my blank mind of mine.
Then, it can turn into a shit storm.
Leaving me a chaotic mess.

I am told that it is okay,
But in all honestly, that's hard to believe.
I don't doubt the relationship and friendships surrounding my exist,
I doubt if this is all in my head.
I doubt if they genuinely love me.
I doubt if the words I speak actually hold value to a person.
Overall,
I doubt myself.
And this sudden shift in the system surrounding me is making me feel uneasy.

a.b.