Vyra

I already missed sleeping on the cold hard floor of the Outcast shack and the absolutely boring day I would have after waking.

Today, I was torn from my new comfortable bed when the white winter sun rose above the mountains. Titus growled at me to get my ass up, his blunt fingers digging into my shoulder. He waited outside after handing me a pile of leather dressings.

Lifting the garments separately, I found a black long-sleeved shirt and black pants that had extra layers of stiffened leather over where softer points of the body were located.

Fuck. I had almost forgotten about whatever training the Alpha had planned for me. I had no doubt he would use the opportunity to kick my ass until the goddess Lunae was ready for my soul.

I had little time to acclimate to my room, which still felt unreal and started climbing into my new clothes. I occupied myself with how strange it was not to wake up to the bickering of Sonya and Petir.

They probably were worried sick, wondering where I had gone. The Mistress was already probably steaming because I didn't show up to the weaver cabin for work.

I almost slipped on my worn leather shoes before noticing shiny black boots by the door. Not wanting to piss off the irritable guard, I made my way out of the room as soon as I dressed fully.

Titus gave me a strange look, lingering on my probably matted wavy hair before stiffening into position from his relaxed stance on the wall.

"I will take you to the Alpha. He is waiting for you in the training area."

I'd never visited, but I knew it was where all the Lycans go to improve their battle skills and socialize. A spike of anxiety rose in me at the idea of that humiliation.

"You'll be alone." Titus threw out the comment as if it were nothing, not turning to make sure I followed him as he walked away.

"I am not sure I am ready," I said quietly. "I would like to ask the Alpha for more time to get used to this. It is all new for me, and I might be distracted during training."

Titus took a little time to correct me, "We let you take your rest. You've been sleeping the last two days. You wouldn't leave your mate waiting any longer, would you?"

Ignoring his sarcasm, I felt my body jolt. I had been asleep for two days. It became harder to take each step forward.

When we arrived at the training field, I took in every detail. It was a desolate, flat area bordering the outside of our guard walls and the thick forest.

Titus and I stood near the edge, my training partner nowhere to be found.

I sighed, swiveling on my feet. "Well, I guess we can head back."

A hand snatched me mid-march, making the world swirl with white and brown until it faced an unamused Lycan soldier.

"You wait for the Alpha."

"Okay." I squeaked out, letting out a true sigh of relief when Titus let go of my shirt. He shook his head as he settled back into position.

Sadly, the man had been right. Within the next minute, the Alpha stalked up to the clearing.

His figure was ash across the snow, dressed in black leathers and tall like a smoke flume. His silver eyes flicking between us.

I cowered underneath his gaze, feeling less brave in the daylight. He looked me up and down, his nostrils flaring. Lingering where Titus pulled at my shirt, making my skin prickle.

He turned his attention to Titus, who appeared to wane under the other man's silence.

"My apologies again Seren. I am still learning how to conduct myself around this unusual circumstance." The man bowed his head.

I knew I was the unusual circumstance he referred to, but I could not understand what he was apologizing for. Not waking me up two days ago?

The Alpha looked unimpressed.

When Titus bowed again and walked away without another word, I felt the same panic I did yesterday at being alone with him. While Titus found me to be not worth his time, he was a welcome buffer between us.

"Vyra." The Alpha greeted gruffly, his baritone voice echoing off the trees and settling into my bones.

His chin lifted, expecting something back. I was entirely out of my element.

There were swords, javelins, and spears hung up on wooden posts to my left. To my right were dummies used for target practice.

I didn't belong here. I belonged in the cabin that smelled like boiling berry dye and had a mountain of wool littering the floor. My fingers were made to bleed from the prick of a needle, not from battle.

"Alpha." I awkwardly dipped my head in a bow. Seren frowned but said nothing of my clumsy move. I stuttered, "How is this going to work?"

The man started to pace, and I realized he had a bit of a habit. Every time he crossed in front of me, I inhaled his spiced scent. I stepped away to clear my senses.

"Who are the Clans that make up our pack? What do they represent? How are they defined?" The man fired each question at me, refusing to answer my own.

I inhaled shakily before I recited exactly what I learned. "There are four Clans within Pack Rupes, each blessed by a different deity of the natural world. The magic with which each clan is bestowed is not through skin, as any clan member can be of any mortal race, and emits through their hair and eyes."

It is why I so easily was found out to be a hybrid. My black eyes were thought to carry no blessing of my own.

"Clan Sol has the protection of the sun. They are red-haired with amber eyes. They are often provided work that require brute strength or are related to fire. Clan Stellae of the stars are golden-haired and sapphire eyed, and act as the packs' healers and astrologers. Clan Caelum are blessed by the sky, and have dark brown hair and eyes of jade. Bright and cunning, they are the war strategist for the entire pack or historians. Clan Umbra is a defender of night, with members possessing black hair and silver eyes."

I paused, causing the Alpha to stop in his tracks. His eyes piqued with sudden interest, making me more hesitant to speak about his Clan.

"Go on." His lips curled up in warning, his cheek dimpling on just one side.

My stomach dipped low, wondering how I hadn't noticed that feature on him before. I liked it when he smiled less.

Being born, becoming his mate, and lastly being named as a contender to become the next Alpha were more than likely on his ever-growing list. I could see every slight piling up in his mind.

Clan Umbra was brutal. Conniving. Often tactful, sometimes detrimentally impulsive. Forged to draw blood and carve new paths for the pack. They would rather rip out throats than allow the bearer mercy.

"Clan Umbra are warriors." Playing it safe, I waited for the Alpha to preen.

His full mouth pursed. He stayed silent for a few more moments, his eyes boring into me as if expecting me to say something else.

When I remained silent, he shook his head and continued to assess my knowledge.

"Good, at least you know that much. Who is our matron goddess?"

"Lunae, goddess of the moon. We worship her above all others because most Lycan need the direct light of the moon to shift."

Other than the Alpha, and now apparently myself.

"Right again. What ritual does a Lycan have to go through to become a true and binding member of our pack?"

"In Mutantur." The Changing. When completed, it marked a Lycan's rite of passage into adulthood.

"Do you know what it entails?"

Outcasts were not allowed to go through the Changing. No one joined our ranks through the years, so that meant everyone who tried succeeded in recent years.

"No."

"The Changing encompasses three trials, each one occurring during an important phase of life. The trial of self at age eight, the trial of others at age thirteen, and the trial of the earth. The members within our pack secure their rite by their eighteenth year and have been training all their lives for it."

The Alpha eyed me carefully, his brows lowering until his irises appeared like storm clouds.

I swallowed loudly, my palms growing sweaty. I took a step back, though the man made no move to get closer. "As you know I never had to go through The Changing. I am sure that will put me at a disadvantage for our battle."

My stomach churned as my eyes accidentally locked onto the Alpha's muscles, sculpted by sparring and hunting. There was no catching up with that.

His voice cut through my unease, "While I am very flattered by your gawking mate, that is not the point of what I am saying." I winced, eyes clashing with his as he crossed his arms over his chest. "You must complete all phases of the ritual before the year is over."

Fucking hell.

Like a wolf hunting for a rabbit, he sensed my urge to flee. My eyes searched frantically across the snowy clearing, looking for a place to run and hide. Seren's silver eyes tracked every movement, catching my white hair as it floated in the chilled wind.

He missed nothing, waiting for complete stillness. All I could feel was panic because that is how the Alpha planned to train me. I would have to learn what other Lycan learned over eighteen years in one.

"Has a hybrid ever even tried? Or succeeded?" My voice pitched higher. I cleared my throat, flicking snow away from my cheeks.

The Alpha turned away from me, walking over to the rack with the terrifying weapons. He pulled out a spear, spinning it within his palms. "Before our laws changed many years ago, many hybrids attempted The Changing. Not a single one earned the rite."

My breath became strangled in my throat. I coughed, pounding on my chest as my heartbeat spiked.

"What is it that caused them to fail?"

I wanted to know, even if it was something I couldn't prevent.

The Alpha shook his head, his grip on his spear tightening. He stopped just a couple feet before me looking me up and down, realizing I was getting further and further away. Again he carried this strange expression, like everything I did was disappointing.

It more than likely was, as the fact I was his mate set in again. He was the Alpha of the pack, and I was a hybrid that had never breathed near this kind of weapon. I was weak and unsuitable for the Lycan that wielded it like it was an extension of his body.

I wouldn't be surprised if he looked at my soft build and cursed the moon goddess in vain.

"I wouldn't worry about that right now." The Alpha straightened his stance, blocking out the morning sun. "Before you even attempt the first trial, you need to learn how to shift."

"I-I can't." My head continued to shake side to side with refusal. My stomach threatened to revolt as I thought of my bones cracking and my skin ripping apart.

It was painful, it gave me power. I hated every second of it.

"Have you even tried? Don't lie." The Alpha commanded, growing more stern as he analyzed her for deception.

Biting my lip, I thought of the night I first shifted. I tried again after I left his cabin, hoping if I did I could run away. The very untimely ability failed me when I needed it the most. "Yes. It didn't work. I think it was just a trick from the goddess."

"A trick yes...just not from the goddess." Seren contemplated, his silver eyes brilliant. Snowflakes started to form a crown in his dark, wavy hair. When he addressed me directly, I sucked in a breath, "Is there something you missed having this morning that you enjoyed while in the shack." It was a question, but the Alpha stated it as fact.

I wasn't sure what he was referring to. I went through my routine, and only came up with one thing.

"I mean, I did like having my morning tea." I said, shrugging my shoulders.

Silver flashed with recognition. "How often did you drink it?"

"Everyday."

"Everyday. Without missing a cup?"

"If I did, the Mistress would bring it to the weaver cabin for work. I mean she didn't like me, but it was one thing I was grateful for." I added uncomfortably, feeling odd about sharing something so meager about my daily life..

The Alpha nodded, his tongue in his cheek as he was visibly frustrated. He let out an unamused laugh. "Just as I suspected. This serves as the greatest example as to why I had you moved to the castle, where I can keep track of what you are given, and what you are taking."

Surely, the Alpha would have no issues with me drinking tea. I let out a small laugh, before his insinuations caught up to me.

My shoulders caved in, my smile falling. I swore pity flashed in my opponent's eyes, and it made it all worse. I had little to count on before. And now I have even less.

"Mistress."

I did not fool myself into thinking the old woman cared for me or even liked me by any means. But I didn't think she would try to hurt me, not like that.

His face was once again impartial. His voice was low as it traveled across the clearing. "She didn't even admit to it, not even when I held the kettle to her face. Stubborn elder. Too proud to admit that she had been lacing your tea with wolf's bane and forcing you to drink it."

My body reacted before my mind could as I heard my fears confirmed out loud. It felt like he had taken that weapon and whacked it across my chest.

Wolf's bane is poison to our kind. Fatal in almost all cases, and especially after prolonged use.

I thought of her wrinkled hands, hunched spine, and thin gray hair, almost white. The lack of kindness in her eyes when she corrected me. But there had been some tender moments, like when she grabbed me extra material to weave a scarf. On rare occasions, she even smiled when I was clumsy.

I was nobody's daughter. But to hear the person who raised me also put me in harm's way? It was all too much.

The Alpha interrupted my thoughts. "You are a hybrid. We have now learned what wolf's bane does to your kind. It merely took away your ability to shift. If you had full Lycan blood, you would've been dead with your first cup. She was playing a dangerous game, and I will find out why."

He was right. If she wasn't trying to kill me, what had she been attempting?

I was called soulless for years because I thought I couldn't change. If anyone had thought differently, I would have been killed as a child. The ability had just been dormant.

Which meant it wasn't the goddess or some dark magic that made me shift the other night. It was me.

"Maybe it's been so long that I cannot shift properly. If I can only shift when I am in immediate danger, then there is no point in training me now."

The Alpha swatted away my suggestion like it was an insect.

"You will."

"What if I can't?"

The Alpha stepped closer, enough that I had to crane my neck to see him. The heat emanating from his body felt like summer. I felt those tiny threads pricking my body, trying to pull me closer to him.

I rejected the influence of the bond, an empty hollowness filling my chest.

No. My body remained frozen as I took in his large frame.

"If you ever want to see your friends again, you will try and you will not fail." The Alpha looked down at me, spitting out the word friends like it was bitter tasting.

"You've hurt them? Imprisoned them too?"

The Mistress had to be sitting in the dark prison underneath the castle. I shouldn't care considering how the woman treated me like dirt. Still, imagining the elder encaged made me feel nauseous. If Sonya and Petir were with her too, just because of me...

The Alpha looked at my hands, now curled into fists. I let them go with a gasp, not realizing I could have shown him the anger I felt inside.

Anger that would do me no good against an unbeatable enemy.

"No, but I can keep you away from them until you learn." His brows raised. I bit my tongue until I tasted blood. "No matter how long it takes. Three months a year? It does not matter to me." His eyes flickered over me in a way that made me simmer. "I can be patient."

He turned to walk away from me, placing the spear back in its place.

Without thinking, I ran to his side. I kept my hands fastened to my body so I didn't make the mistake of touching him again, even by accident.

"Please, Alpha Umbra. Please don't do this, there is no way to tell if I can shift again, ever. I need them, I can't go through this alone."

Seren turned around with a fortress of anger that I didn't understand. For the first time he bared his teeth at me, all wolf and no man.

"Begging won't do you any good. Now shift."