It was too long and too soon when they reach John's house. The silence was not like the silence that they were used to all those years ago when they lived together and Sherlock was in his mind palace. It was too hesitant, too awkward, too unknown. It was as if they didn’t know each other anymore, two different people from two different towns who had never had met.

But they both knew that wasn’t the case. They had just gone through so much when they were apart that they had changed as people, changed so much that they couldn’t recognise each other anymore.

John didn't say a word as Sherlock followed him up the path and inside the lit house and the moment they were over the threshold, John sighed, a harsh, almost world-shattering sigh. "Alex is up" He said, pointing to the sliver of light emerging from up the stairs. 

Alex often disobeyed him when it came to bedtimes and house rules but this just annoyed him more than normal. She must have known that Sherlock had turned up at his work and they had spoken, probably by the fact that John had left his phone off or the fact that he hadn’t returned home at the usual time. God, why had she inherited Sherlock’s bloody mind reading powers!

“It’s.... 11’clock.... and a school night.” Sherlock stated, looking at John’s face which had suddenly turned angry... no, upset.

"If you were in her position, would you go to sleep when your omega dad told you to?" John asked, standing at the bottom of the stairs and debating what to do. He could tell her to go to sleep or he could call her down, let her stay with Sherlock for a while and have her be a moody little thing in the morning before school. Briefly he considered allowing her to have the day off but he knew that that would only aggravate the problem.

“I suppose not.” Sherlock replied, standing nervously in the hallway. He knew that children often didn’t obey their omega parent as much as they would their alpha one but he had thought a lot over the past few days and he had come to the conclusion that John would be the strict parent out of the both of them. “Maybe I should go?”

Of course he didn’t want to go but he couldn’t just walk into John’s life and act like nothing had happened. John had hurt him, badly but he still loved John like the day that he left. However he realised that John had probably moved on him, had a better life without him. No more experiment in the kitchen. No more dark days. No more Sherlock...

John bit his lip, not wanting Sherlock to leave but knowing he couldn't act like the last twelve years didn't happen. He knew that after all the pain that he had caused his daughter that he couldn’t make Sherlock not see her but then again he needed to keep his distance from Sherlock as much as he could. John nodded to Sherlock, heading toward the door so that he could at least show the alpha out. Suddenly there's a shrill cry of "NO!" from the top of the stairs and both men turn to see their daughter standing there appearing almost close to tears.

It breaks both of their hearts to hear their daughter so upset, especially when it’s their fault. They have hurt her enough already.

Sherlock quickly turned around when he heard the scream. Suddenly a little body ran down the stairs and grabbed hold of him tightly around his shoulders.

“You can’t go. You left last time and I didn’t get to see you again. I thought you were gone. Don’t leave again.” The voice screamed, tears obviously falling down her cheeks as she buried her head in Sherlock’s shoulder.

Sherlock feels conflicted. He can’t leave his daughter in this state but at the same time he can’t butt into John’s life, especially after John made the effort to get away from him all those years ago.

John swallowed harshly, hating the way she sounded so heartbroken. What he hated more was the fact he was going to have to break it even more because he needed to distance himself as he couldn’t let himself get hurt when Sherlock made it clear that they could never be a couple again after all that he had done.

"Alex... Y--"

"No!" She looked around just a bit, but she's still clung onto Sherlock. "I got him here before and you made him leave! I’m going to let you take him away from me again! He's staying tonight, at least." Alex then looked back to Sherlock. "Dad, you're staying!"

She defiantly wasn't asking. John sighed, his head bowing down so that Sherlock couldn’t read the look on his face an see the heart ache. He didn’t say a word, not exactly agreeing but not arguing either. 

“I can sleep on the sofa.” Sherlock suggested, not wanting to impose on John but really wanting to stay. It’s not really like he had a choice in the matter as his daughter had a death grip on him.

"There's a spare room." John told Sherlock, his head still bowed but the tears managed to stay in even though he realised that he had hurt his daughter, caused her to hate him. "Harry uses it from time to time." John hesitated before he turned and headed upstairs to show Sherlock the room so he could escape to his room as quickly as possible.

“Ok... thanks.” Sherlock replied, plying Alex’s arms off of his body so that he could follow John upstairs.”I really appreciate this.”

Alex smiled, keeping quiet and knowing she got her way once again. With luck, she could make this more frequent. Having her dad's in one place...

“I don’t have any spare clothes or a toothbrush or... anything.” Sherlock realised, trying to think of a way round it. “I will just have to go home early and get changed because I have a meeting with a client at 9.”

John nodded. "Well, Alex will be in school by then.. So.." John trailed off after that, not up to adding 'so you have no reason to be here because that sounded far kinder in his head then it would out loud. 

“Ok... well that’s good.” Sherlock commented, looking around the spare bedroom. “I don’t really understand why you want me here though, Alex? You have to get to bed now and by the time you wake up I will probably be gone.”

Alex shrugs and smiles. "You're coming back after, right? When I get back from school?"

“That depends on what your dad says.” Sherlock replied, smiling at his daughter. He was so happy that his daughter wanted him in her life. If he couldn’t have John then at least he would have her.

“Course. I won’t be home till 5 but you two can go and get an earlier dinner if you want.” He would be having a takeaway for one then. It just showed him how he was losing her, losing her slowly to the man he has loved for 14 years.

“Thanks.” Sherlock said, smiling at John. “I really appreciate it. I want to get to know her properly, teach her new things and always be there for her. I won’t let her down.”

Alex frowned, putting her hair up in a ponytail. "I am here, you know!" 

John smiled at Alex and then at Sherlock. He trusted that Sherlock wouldn't let her down when she only wanted Sherlock in her life.. 

“Yes, well... I thought that you should both know that.” Sherlock answered, looking down at the floor awkwardly.

Alex slid her much smaller hand into Sherlock’s and beamed up at her dad. "I trust you. And I know dad does too."

John doesn't breathe a word, just gives a very slight nod in agreement. 

“Good.” Sherlock replied, squeezing her hand. It was only slightly smaller than his own but it fit perfectly into his hand. It was weird but it felt right.

“I’m going to go and have some food.” John announced before he turned around and walked out of the room, needing to get away from his alpha’s pheromones.

Alex grinned when John disappeared and turned back to Sherlock. "He's happy you're back, you know. He's missed you." 

Alex can remember, when she was six, she and Harry could hear her dad crying softly from downstairs. Harry had held her close and explained that it was her dad's - Sherlock's - birthday. Since then, John always got sad on Sherlock's birthday and what used to be their anniversary. She'd never heard him cry after that night, though. Despite that, Alex knew he still cried about it. Sometimes she'd come home from school and John would have red eyes. 

She didn't like seeing anyone she cared about like that.

“I don’t think he is.” Sherlock stated simply. Even though Alex probably knew John better than he did as she had known him for longer than Sherlock had and had known the person that he had become after he left Sherlock, but he knew she was wrong. John would have gotten in contact with him sooner if he missed him like Sherlock had missed him and John was not acting happy. It seemed that he was only letting Sherlock see Alex because he was her father and he couldn’t do anything to change that.

"You're wrong. He is." She shook her head, the few curls that had not been put in the hair tie bounced around as she did. 

“He isn’t.” Sherlock argued quietly, hoping that Alex wouldn’t hear him. He walked around the spare room. It looked like any other room. Bed, Wardrobe, Bedside table, Rug. The walls were white, almost like a hospital but it didn’t bother Sherlock. He had slept in worst places, especially when he went on a drugs spree after John had left.

Alex heard, but didn't say a word. She waited a moment before she went over to Sherlock and hugged him fiercely. "Promise you'll be here when I get back from school"

Sherlock was starting to like hugging Alex. She was the perfect size and ever so warm. Her scent was like John but totally different. Trees and jam and chemicals. “I promise.” He whispered, brushing his lips over the top of her head in an almost tender kiss.

Alex grinned before tightening her arms for a moment and then running off to her room, bumping into John on her way out the door. She yelled a goodnight to them both. John gave a small chuckle before he turned to Sherlock, feeling a little bit better after having some food. "I just came to say that I'm going to bed. My room's at the end of corridor if you need anything. I'll be up at half six and I usually wake Alex up at seven for school"

“Ok...” Sherlock replied quietly, sitting down on the bed. “And John, thank you for this. You didn’t have to be so nice about all of this.”

John had to laugh at that. "I think that if anyone is being too nice about this, it's you..."

“Hhhh... Me! I don’t think I’m being nice. I walked out on you two weeks ago. I should have got outside for some air and then returned and asked all those questions that I asked today. I suppose at first I was confused, I didn’t really know what to say. But when I went home and thought about it all, as the days went on I saw Alex in my mind and it calmed me down a bit. I just... I don’t know... I am angry but I then I look at her and it reminds me that you looked after her, raised her, made her, carried her all on your own so I can’t be completely angry with you.” Sherlock admitted, putting his head in his hands. He was still so confused.

John didn't know what to do. His Omega nature was screaming at him to go comfort the man that his Omega considered his Alpha. But John knew he couldn't do that. That would only make Sherlock reject him and that would cause him too much pain.

In the end, John just mumbled the words "I'm sorry" before he left the room. 

Sherlock settled down on the bed, snuggling under the warm duvet, hoping that his brain would let him get to sleep as he really wasn’t in the mood to ponder over what had happened over the past two weeks as he had done every night since he had found out about Alex.

Despite everything - the stress, the worry he'd felt, the drama, the high strung emotions - John was out like a light the moment his head hit the pillow.