" I can't believe your actually making me do this." Colton sighs, crossing his strong arms across his chest, making the ink bulge on his biceps.

I swing open the heavy door to one of the staff areas under the arena, it's swamped with tones of the crew, dancers and band members. I freeze in the doorway feeling all eyes on me, then they all fall to the floor after glancing at the six-foot creature next to me. I can hear my heartbeat thumping loudly in my ears, this is so awkward. Colton coughs and presses his palm into the small of my back moving me forward with him out of the doorway. Voices start to pick up again but only slightly. Are they really this afraid of Colton?

"Don't just stand there, we don't bite." A little purple-headed woman pops up by my side and holds out two red solo cups, Colton snatches it from her hand, I can feel him tense up beside me as he swallows the contents but I push the cup away apologetically.

"We're just about to play some games if you guys want to join in?" She adds, wandering over to foldable table surrounded by a cluster of bodies and big liquor bottles.

"Alright, guys now everyone's here let's play some games!" She shouts at the rest of the room who start joining us around the table.

I can still feel everyone taking pocket glances at me and Colton every now and then which makes me feel a bit like some kind of museum exhibition, I can promise them I'm not that exciting. Coltons stood beside me not saying or doing anything at all, so much for team building on his part. I notice a flock of the women in the room are carefully edging their way around the table to get closer to him, one of them seductively hands him a new red cup which he gratefully accepts.

"You're empty-handed girl and that simply won't do! What do you want babe?" A woman with thick curly hair walks up beside me and gestures to the stack of alcohol on the side.

"Actually do you have any diet coke, I'm not much of a drinker...?"

She looks at me sceptically and nods,

"Kinda missing the point of a drinking game but eh whatever floats your boat." She fetches goes to fetch me a can.

Colton nudges me, "Are you sure you don't want a drink? We're only travelling tomorrow?"

I just nod back, I don't drink, I never have. I'm always the sober, responsible friend on a night out.

"Right then, let's start with... Never Have I Ever, rules are simple! Drink for yes, don't for no- capiche?" The purple-haired girl winks and takes a long sip out of her cup.

"Wow real mature, are we like seventeen?" Colton snides, I backhand him in the pec, nearly shattering the bones in my hand.

"Ignore him," I say glaring at him whilst he huffs, he downs his drink and looks away from me. Stubborn child.

The rooms fills with silence again, some look concerned, some look shocked but the purple-haired girl looks like she's about to burst into laughter.

"Alright-teee... I'll start." , She ponders, "Never have I ever...had a one night stand."

There's a collective groan, obviously not a scandalous enough question but never the less the whole group raises their drinks to their lips.

The questions are passed around the table for the next couple minutes, each one getting further and further away from PG.

"Never have I ever had a threesome." I keep my can in my hand for this one, the drinker's decrease but Colton, who now has girls hanging off his arm is taking a long ass sip.

"Never have I ever been arrested." Oh boy.

Hastily I push the rim of the can to my lips and take a short sip hoping no one sees.

"Ooo scandalous, someone call TMZ Gigis got some drama." The purple-haired girl, who I now know is Ruby, shouts drawing all attention to me.

"Shut up, no way everyone's perfect little favourite has been arrested," Colton says jabbing his fingers into my arm, he's definitely past tipsy now.

I look around the table at the beady eyes waiting for me to tell the story.

" Okay...ugh" I groan, "So it's pretty stupid", I take a deep breath wondering whether this is going to earn me brownie points or stupidity marks,

" Last year my best friends and I went to Wireless festival and Sofia had... a little bit too much to drink... and ended up convincing me to partake in one of her brilliant ideas, which as I've found are never actually that brilliant. She thought it would be hilarious too... knock over a porta-loo over and trap someone inside..." I look up from my hands, which are clamped tightly together, the facial expressions are very worrying, "So at the end of the night we... pushed one over but pushed it the wrong way so whoever we trapped in there was able to get out. Turns out we had nearly trapped a police office... he pulled himself out of the upturned toilet covered other peoples shit and that blue water stuff and proceeded to try and arrest me and Sofia for 'assault against an officer'. She ran away screaming 'You'll never catch me alive' but was eventually caught because she could barely walk straight and we were dragged out of Finsbury park and pushed into the back of a police car." I place my can on the table and gauge the mood... nobody says anything... oh fuck.

"So not that scandalous... more very stupid... and we ended up spending the night in the cells until Sofs brother bailed us out..." Nobody moves, they just stand there wide-eyed until I hear an inconsolable gruff laugh come from behind me, Colton is clutching his sides laughing which encourages the whole room to bust out into some kind of laughing chorus.

Gigi Lastra- now know as the tour laughing stock,

"Girl, you're kinda wild," Ruby says between fits of giggles.

"And you did that sober?" The curly-haired girl, Meghan says next to me.

I nod with my hand pressed firmly to thy head tying to conceal my shame-filled eyes.

"Oh fuck me doll you've one hundred per cent earnt your self a new nickname," Colton pauses trying to catch his breath. He finally opens his mouth, "Porta-potty pusher."

The mix of different laughs engulfs the room, I shake my head and give him a light shove, he catches my hand holding it against his chest and pulls me into this side for a sloppy hug. His minty vanilla scent wrapping itself around my body, I love it, sometimes I even get a waft of citrusy lemon. I can feel his heartbeat hammering against his chest beneath his pec, somehow relieving me off all my embarrassment and actually causing me to stifle a giggle. He dips his head to my ear letting the alcohol to roll off his tongue and tangle around my loose bits of hair.

"I'm joking don't worry Spill... but come on its pretty good!" He raises his arms out like he just cured world hunger, I drop my head against his chest and laugh defeatedly, his laugh vibrates through his body making my head judder slightly. I love seeing Colton when he's happy, he's so free and actually pretty hilarious. I love seeing him when we write a killer song, he has this burst of pride that just warms my heart, seeing him so proud of something he's written reminds me why I started to write music too. I can't believe I'm saying this but I like spending time with him

and actually I've spent a lot of time with him since the tour started, we've been getting really close and we've become really good friends.

The game carries on into the night, it was nice getting to know everyone and I think I made some friends tonight. The lonely feeling is slowly ebbing away, I've spent most of the night laughing and smiling which I haven't done much of in the last week... it feels really good like a huge weight has been lifted, I feel lighter not worry about everything at home. Eventually, everyone is pretty wasted or they're making out with each other. I've found myself sandwiched between two of the dancers on one of the tatted sofas at the corner of the room. We've spent the last thirty minutes giggling, gossiping and getting to know each other. They're really cool girls and remind me a lot of Sofia and Nicki.

"One hundred per cent the third one is better than the other two!" Nessie says giggling into her can of Vodka Cranberry, wiggling her tatted slender fingers in the air.

"The third one is a work of art but I still think the second film will always be elite!" I chime in resting my head on her shoulder.

Destiny, whos on my right, jumps up and starts doing the steps to the High school musical Two song, 'work this out'.

Nessie and I jump up and join her, horrifically slurring the lyrics,

"WE'VE GOT TO WORK. WORK. WORK THIS OUT. WE'LL MAKE THINGS RIGHT THE SUN WILL SHINE." We all collapse into each other in a fit of laughter, we eventually end up huddle on the floor drawing the attention of several soon to come Instagram videos.

"Oh shit, I've defiantly had way too much to drink..." Destiny says clutching her head, she tries to stand up but fails hopelessly crashing back down on top of us, we double over in inconsolable laughter again. Being the only sober one, I pull both the girls off the floor one by one, holding them lightly as they sway forwards and backwards, my small frame swaying with their weight.

"Yea I really need to go to bed..." Nessie follows, I smile at their sweet drunken state, not the aggressive manipulative kind I'm used to.

"Come on you two lightweights." Ruby and Jackson, other dancers, pop up beside me, taking the weight of the girls from me.

"See you, tomorrow girl," Ruby says as she drags Nessie away, shes still humming high school musical.

I follow behind Jackson as he practically carries Destiny out of the room, I turn the corner out of the doorway and thwack. I thought I'd stupidly walked into the wall but as I back away rubbing my nose I can see I've just walked into Colton with his tongue down some girls throat. The girl has her hands around his neck with his body pushed up against the white-painted cinderblock walls, her bleach blonde hair is scraped up into a bun on top of her head and her hugs a black pinafore dress with black Louboutins that show off her lustrous curves... sporting everything I'm not, making me feel so inadequate. She turns to stare at me, hate radiating through her pupils,

"Oh shit, uh sor-" I stare at the ground feeling overly awkward, Coltons just got a smirk on his lips but looks directly at me.

"Watch where the fuck you're going clutz." She shouts at me, placing one hand on her hip and the other on Colton's chest.

Colton removes her hand, frowning at her, "Hey Laycie don't talk to her like that!" he says anger runs through the words, he then turns back to me... butterfly swarm my stomach under his gaze... he just stood up for me His frown quickly turns into a mischievous grin,

"We have to stop meeting like this spiller, at least your not holding a tray of drinks this time."

That little shit, I try to keep a straight face but I can't hold back the little giggle that escapes my lips.

"Idiot," I say, silently thanking Colton for having relieved some of the very apparent tension.

The blonde girl taps her heel impatiently, making me feel small again.

"Anyway, I'm sorry I'll just.. yea" I begin to walk away,

"Wait, Gigi, can you not tell anyone about this... you know with her being my PA... the label wouldn't exactly... approve..."

PA, holy shit I knew she looked familiar, are they in a relationship? What about the other girls he brings back? Maybe it's a cover-up if he's so worried about getting caught... with his PA.

"Oh uh sure, see you later," I say edging away slightly,

"Off you go kid." Blondie waves her hand at me before ferociously planting her lips on his again.

Well, that wasn't awkward at all, and danm shes a sloppy kisser, even walking away I can still hear them...

"Wait... Laycie...stop... I'm uh not in the mood... okay just... go to bed yea...?"

Is he turning her down?

"Babe, come on! I-" she tries to protest. I really want to stay to see what happens but-

"I'm not your babe... Hey! Supermodel wait up!" Is he calling at me? Hardly the supermodel type. I giggle under my breath.

"Gigi!" I can hear his feet getting quicker behind me, afraid he's going to trip over in his drunken state, I turn around. He practically falls into my arms, nearly toppling over my short body.

"Actually I'm coming with you," he says linking his arm around my shoulder to steady himself, harmless gesture but somehow it makes me feel safe, safe from Blondie, safe from the loneliness and safe from the anxiety that plagues my mind.

"Because you probably know where the fuck the hotel is and I don't even know what country we're in." He says in defeat, I can't help but giggle knowing I told him this morning.

"Antwerp Colton, we're in Antwerp. Oh, and what's with the supermodel thing?"

"Gigi... Gigi Hadid... the supermodel... and you're pretty danm fine doll." He winks at me through his drunken haze. I roll my eyes,

"Oh god shut up CJ," His grip tightens on my shoulder, "You're in a good mood... it's weird... I've only seen your... abusive drunk mind." He peers down at me, his glassy eyes and flushed cheeks making him look so vulnerable, his eyes scan my face as a smile appears above his stubbled chin,

"Well, I guess that's because you make me happy Lastra."

Hey guys!

Thank you so much for reading and apologies for any spelling or grammar mistakes! 

I've gone back to school this week and its so bloody stressful, I've just done my mock exams since this is my last year in sixth form before I go to Uni. So I'll be focusing a lot more on my studies and coursework meaning that updates might be a little behind and slower, I'll try and update every Friday and I've got the next three chapters already written so they should be on time for the next few weeks! I will finish this book though and I'm really sorry if things get behind! I really appreciate all of your support through and I hope you carry on reading until the end! 

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Thanks for reading! 

Iz x