"Lance?" Shiro saw his Paladin hanging out in the library of the garrisons. He's never seen lance pick up a book.

"Oh hey Shiro, keiths still training," lance waved with a kind smile.

"What are you doing in here?" Shiro walked in and sat at the desk with him seeing it was actual books, not text books to study but just books to enjoy as a story, not to study...

"I'm a little overwhelmed being back so I just needed some quiet time," lance shrugged.

"Didn't think you'd be so into books," Shiro joked but it seemed to not be so funny to the Paladin.

"I use to read a lot more before high school, living on a farm and all I didn't have much else to do," lance explained sweetly.

"I didn't know you lived on a farm," Shiro laughed softly.

"It was by a pond so I could go swimming a lot too, mama would bring eggs, and vegetables from the garden, and make treats for the farmers markets down town, we were still close to the city so it wasn't like middle of no where," he smiled brightly remembering the good old days when his brothers and his sisters were teenagers that would be stupid with him and have no cares.

"Sorry I didn't mean to ramble," Lance gulped a little seeing Shiro wasn't going to say anything.

"No no, I like listening, I didn't know that much about you," Shiro waved it off and lance nodded softly.

"Sorry if it's rude to ask, I do like spending time with you Shiro but uh.. why are you suddenly interested?" He pursed his lips. Shiro was his hero and his idol when he went into the garrisons, but Shiro was always so focused on Keith...

"I was gone for a really really long time... and you all have grown up so much since, especially you lance, and with Adam passing away it just got me thinking about how much I've taken advantage of not spending more time with my team, my family," Shiro said softly and lance looked a little sad for him.

"You loved Adam didn't you? Even after you broke up?" Lance asked quietly.

"I did, I still do, I couldn't imagine myself marrying anyone else but him... but I need to think about the future not dwell on the past," Shiro inhaled a shaky breath thinking about his fiancé.

"It's okay to miss someone you love, you can move on but still grieve for them, no ones expecting you to just be okay right away with this," lance nodded slowly and Shiro smiled at him.

"Your a good kid lance, I can see why kinkade likes spending time with you," he chuckled softly but lance pulled his hands under the table into his lap with his ears turning red a little.

"He's nice and listens.." lance mumbled.

But what if he got annoyed with him already? What if kinkade isn't just being nice and listening to his silly rambles and just is praying he's going to stop being so obnoxious. What if he just stops because their not alone in the desert anymore and actually have other people to he with again.

"You okay lance?" Shiro asked noticing his eyes were a little glossy.

"Sorry haha, sorry I forgot to blink for a moment, my eyes are so dry with being back on earth again," he made a terrible lie but hoped Shiro didn't push forward on that.

Shiro knew it was a lie but didn't push.

"Kinkade is in the training room again practicing shooting, you should show him how great our sharpshooter on voltron," Shiro got up and patted his shoulder firmly as he left the blue Paladin in the library to let him have space.

Lance put his face in his hands with a long sigh. Why was he so overwhelmed with being home again? And always flustered or overthinking when he was with Ryan. It made him just want to crawl in a bed and lay there for days, it was exhausting.

"Mama why are yelling at Ron? She just-" "lance Charles You stay out of this!" His father cut the youngest off as his oldest sister looked close to tears but closer to just screaming.

"Jesus you two! She's just a girlfriend! Olivia and I are together! It's not the fucking end of the world!" Veronica snapped but their mother snapped her across the face without hesitation.

"You do not speak to me like that Veronica, and how dare you drag our names through the dirt with-with this sin," maria was already crying as lance sat at the counter wide eyes and Veronica looked even more angry now.

"This is why I never come home because of you! God I hate everyone in this family because how fucking close minded You are! Go outside and see that it's not so bad to be a little different!" Veronica yelled. Rachel backed away and went to hide in her room as lance covered his ears not being able to move.

"Your ruining this family!" Maria cried.

"I can't stand being apart of this family!"

Lances hands shook as he covered his face and bounced his leg under the table. He didn't really want to go home, he didn't want to feel cornered again. One wrong move and there's screaming again.

He sniffled a  little as he kept his hands over his face. He inhaled deeply sitting up and wiping his eyes and nose trying to not cry, he hated being so emotional like this, he needed to stop it, be more positive or no one will want to be around you, no one likes a down in the dumps dumbass, be better, smile dumbass.

He inhaled again sucking it up, waving his hands to calm down and laughed at how stupid he must've looked.

"Geez, I almost lost it for a moment, ha wow," lance stood up and went for a walk instead of sitting and moping.

"What a dumb ass I am, crying over nothing," he laughed shaking his head and walking out the door to get a drink of water or something to get his mind off things. Not even noticing kinkade standing on the other side of the hall seeing his red eyes and hearing it all.