My first month at work wasn’t as smooth as I expected. I was snubbed throughout. Kwame, my boss and only working partner, treated me horribly. He didn’t like it when I stood behind him or beside him when he was explaining things to me. Why? Well, he claimed that I had a heavy breath which, in his words, ‘irritated’ him.
Nothing I did ever pleased him. The extra hours I took nor the paperwork I sent home. I even tried getting him food and that was when I got to know the reason behind his attitude. After I had surprised him with a perfect breakfast from Aunty Koko’s Breakfast Corner on his birthday, he only screamed at me, “I hate fat people, I hate them! Why, can’t you hit the gym or something? Look at you looking so fat!" He spoke so loudly drawing the attention of three other nurses who worked in the facility.

That night, I couldn’t sleep. In fact, it was hell for me. I thought that with a different environment, things were going to be better. My self-esteem was already crushed from home but this worsened everything. And for the first time since I was posted, I had a strong urge to call my mom.
I picked up my phone and pressed the speed dial craving to hear her voice. After the third ring, I gave up. I lay in bed thinking about my life, wondering when I was going to be able to walk past everyone’s criticism and stand on my own to do something. The day I was going to be proud of myself. I didn’t want any empathy from anyone so I stayed strong and pretended to be okay in the midst of people but it was not an easy task when I was alone.

Just then, my phone started ringing. I was curious since no one ever called. I spied at the screen and it was my mother. In tears I smiled, "today my mom has called me." “Mama good evening, I hope you’re doing well and Ruki is also fine?”
“Why are you calling my phone like that Boatemaa? Why? have you received your first allowance? Send it to me, you know your sister has to change her wardrobe since she’s no more in senior high school and the market is bad these days. So, you send it so I can get something for her...”. That was my mother and from the background I heard my sister scream happily. I couldn’t take it anymore. I hung up as I took five tablets of paracetamol to ease my headache. This life is not for me.

Throughout the night I couldn’t sleep and by midnight, I was done with ten tablets of paracetamol. Sleep was still not coming. It was only when I heard from a distance, the call for the Muslim prayer that I started to doze off. Soon I was far gone without realizing that it was a Wednesday. Indeed, you can’t cheat nature.

The persistent knocks on my door woke me up. I was feeling so dizzy and weak that I couldn’t bring myself to stand up.
“Who is there?”, but that only came out as a whimper. I picked up my phone to check the time. "What! Today is Thursday?”. I had slept the whole day through to the next without even realizing. What was I trying to do to myself?
I stood up with all my might and made my way to the door. It was the secretary Fahim, who was at the door.