My mind is fucked.

And it wasn't from any of the alcohol.

Sure, it was spinning, and I can barely make out the details of the room, but my thoughts spiral like a tornado. I don't know where to begin. What am I doing? Lorenzo is right, isn't he? Never thought that would happen. But he's right— I'm the biggest bitch in the fucking universe. All I've been doing is mind-fucking Julian like he used to do to me before we crossed the line.

He deserves a lot of things, but not that.

Slowly, I sink onto the cobblestone, keeping my legs in the water as my body faces the naked sky. No stars in sight— as expected, in this crowded city called New York. The only shining light in the sky comes from the pretty, big moon, hidden behind the rays of clouds.

My mind drifters to a different place, a different time when Julian and I were just that— us. The night I learned about my brothers's departure.

A night when we were just Julian and Isabela— nothing more in between us. Now, it almost feels like there's so much baggage, emotions, uncertainty to ever be what we once were. I barely remember that girl who stared at the stars whenever things got a tiny bit harder to fight for. She's a fragment of my imagination.

We're both two completely different people now.

Would things be the same?

Could we love each other in the way that's right for us?

Could we be the next Mika and Asiel?

Even with my past, I've always believed in soulmates. Someone that feels like the missing piece needed to complete this thing called life. A year ago, I had no doubt Julian was the lost piece, but now... Do we still make sense together?

I love him.

Ugh, my mind is spinning.

No, really, it's spinning.

The sky isn't one cohesive image. No, it's a tornado of whirling stars, causing my stomach to turn itself inside out. All of the sudden, my mouth fills with saliva, and I instantly know where this is heading, but I don't react in time. As expected, since drinking lags your reaction time. I throw up all over myself.

Chunks everywhere.

My body feels heavy, impossible to move, but the vomit won't let up.

Panic arises in my chest as my mouth fills up with the chunky vomit. My throat seizes up, causing a wheezing sound to come out of me. I can't breathe. My arms flap around, but they do nothing to help me.

"Woah! Woah! Hey!" Someone yells.

Before I know it, I'm turned to my side, and have two fingers inside my mouth, digging out the puke. Yum sweet air rushes its way into my lungs. A hand rubs my back as I relieve the contents in my stomach. Despair swells in chest as I acknowledge how I almost died and have a random person's finger in my mouth.

"You're okay," he consoles, removing his fingers from my mouth and shifting to flicking the things on my face. "I got you, Isabela."

My breathing hollows out, and I'm able to focus on something that isn't just my breathing. I come face-to-face with a pair of blue eyes. My eyebrows crinkle. His skin was sun-kissed golden meshed with a light beachy blonde hair. He looks familiar— an older version of—.

"Hernan?"

His features lighten up. "Hola, prima."

My eyes open wide and bulge in my head. Oh, god. My entire body reeks of shame and embarrassment. My baby cousin has caught me red-handed in the worst predicament ever. Baby cousin is an understatement. He's grown up since the last time I saw him at the age of seven.

An aching sensation comes from my head when I try to move. "Don't judge me," I hiss, swinging my gaze away to not meet his. "I literally almost lost my chance at life."

He shrugs. "I didn't say anything... but you should really be careful with how much you drink next time."

I bite back the urge to gag as I swipe the mushy oatmeal looking vomit off my body. "I know. I know. I don't know what I was thinking, and I definitely didn't want this to be the way we reconnect."

Hernan was immune to the disease my brothers spread like wildfire— the Isabela cooties. My brothers weren't my only tormentors. Like my papa, they like to keep it in the family. We didn't have very many cousins, which for a Hispanic familia is an odd occurrence, but they turned all of them against me before I could mutter a word.

But not Hernan.

I never understood why.

He was the youngest, the most impressionable. His older sister, Vicki, didn't like me. Maybe he took pity on me. Anyone could see how uncomfortable I was during familia events— Hernan and occasionally Isa would make them a bit bearable.

His brows furrows. "Don't think too much about it. We're both still kids who make dumb decisions." He turns his face to take a sig of his drink.

I arch a brow. "Why are you drinking! You aren't even eighteen yet."

Shaking his head, he let out a laugh. "You can't seriously be giving me drinking advice after I just saved your ass from puking yourself to death. Besides, I'm almost seventeen."

Out of instinct, I squeeze his cheeks, which aren't as chubby as I remembered. "Don't be such an ass."

He swats my hand away. "Don't baby me, please. I get enough of that from my mother."

"How's Tia Gloria," I say dryly.

He exhales. "Well, I've a new step dad. My fifth one. Let's see how long it lasts this time. Also, I'm not the baby anymore. Since last year, I'm now a big brother to my little brother, Jayden."

I flinch. "Does all that crying bother you?"

His lips sit in a straight, flat line. "Better than all the moaning from the sex, I suppose." Hernan nudges my shoulder. "What happened to you? One second, I saw you at Tia Maggie's wedding, and the next you were erased from memory."

To think that was only four years ago.

I sigh, wrapping my arms around my body. Now, that I was more sober, I could feel the rise of goosebumps on my arms, and click my teeth together. Hernan notices, unzipping his beige hoodie and placing it over my shoulders. The wooly fabric clasped my skin in a warm party.

"You understand where we come from... what our family are?" I ask.

He chuckles. "I might be young, but I'm not blind, Isabela. We sell drugs to make a living. My mom snorts drugs for a living. We kill, torture, and destroy people's lives to give us a better standing in this world."

Nodding slowly, I look in his eyes. "My husband brought me." His eyes widen like saucers. "For five million dollars, I think. Oh, and what led to that was me working at a strip club for a few weeks. They handcuffed me and flew me out to Italy."

Hernan's eyes narrows as awareness dawns on him. "You mean the husband that was devouring that girl's mouth in there?"

"Can you keep a secret?" I whisper, and he tilts his head in an up and down motion. "That's not really Damien, it's his brother Lorenzo. My husband..." My tongue ties up as I try to figure out the best way to describe him. "He's someone I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy."

"Like my mom's husband, number two bad?"

My shoulders slump. "Worse."

Hernan drapes his arm over my shoulder, pushing my head into the crook of his neck. My body stays rigid and tight. Quickly, I frantically blink my eyes to keep them from getting glossy. This moment brought a piece of young Isabela back to life. Memories flood through the gates of my mind of times when Hernan would console me after my brother's hurtful games. Being young, his natural instinct was to make me laugh, but now we can acknowledge how much we've both changed since those days.

He no longer had the absent-mind to bury things down with jokes. His banter wasn't enough for me and certainly wasn't enough for him. We've both awakened to the true nature of the world that lies in front of us, and can't mask behind a shadow of comedy.

This was real.

Our lives were fucked up.

And that's the truth.

"Even now, your body still tenses up from a single touch," Hernan mutters.

I exhale. "Reflex."

"I'm sorry about your sad excuse for a father," he strangles out, voice breaking. "You didn't deserve to be abused. I would help you kill him and hide the body with you."

I toy with the ends of my hair. "Don't worry about it. He's dead anyway."

"Really?" His voice dipped in a surprise tone. "I swear I heard him mentioned at the fam-."

The sound of bullets flying shatters the secluded backyard. I didn't have a chance to respond or think before another fire is shot, coming from the house. Hernan's entire body jolts upward in a fighting stance. Screams erupt from within my house. A young woman comes stumbling out through the back doors and clutches her oozing stomach. She drops to her knees and lolls to her side on the grass.

"Holy shit," Hernan curses.

"What's happening?" My voice comes out as a quiver.

Hernan springs into action, and on his feet before I could even blink. Another fire rings through in my ears. My heart is racing so hard in my chest at this moment that I find myself breathing faster, exhaling in short, puffy breaths. I sit still like a deer in headlights. Any killer instinct I had disappears under the rubbles of a scared girl. Hernan manhandles me by dragging me up upward from his hold on my hoodie.

"Isabela, you need to go." His words fall on dead ears. "Isabela!" He shakes my frame. "Wake up! You're the Jefe of this familia. You're the prime target."

"W-What?" I breathe.

My updated status had gone over my head. This wasn't anything new. I've always been a target— whether that was to kill or be kidnapped isn't relevant. They both fall in the same ballpark. I don't know what to do, how to react— I don't want to die or have others die for me.

I'm fucking choking up at the sign of a fight.

Hernan cups my cheeks. "Hey, you aren't alone. Just focusing on surviving and forget everything else."

I nod.

Moments later, we're walking past the dead girl's body in the backyard as Hernan leads us into the house. Chaos reeks everywhere. Blood stains the walls, floors, and furniture. We don't waste a second. Sounds of clashing bottles, vases, and dead bodies invade my ears like there's no tomorrow.

From the corner of my eye, I catch two men in black clothing come out of the shadows like fucking slender man. Their dark, flat gaze finds mine first, and alarm immediately rings in their eyes. Panic fills me up like a balloon. Their guns stand in my direction, firing it without a second thought.

"Isabela!" Hernan shouts, using the swipe of his arm to push me behind him and taking the bullet for me.

The blast of the ammo causes his body to fall onto me, and I lose my balance, causing us to fall to the ground. My body feels wet and cold, coming from the blood oozing out of his stomach. Do I drag Hernan out of this house or do I go after those two assholes and hope he makes it out? My decision is short-lived when a ray of bullets fly from behind me, killing the mystery men.

Slowly, I turn my body to meet our saviors, and my heart leaps in joy. "Lorenzo!"

"Fuck," he curses, kneeling to get in eye-level with me. His bloody finger caresses the side of my cheek. "Bella-boo, you had me worried sick." He signs wearily, holding the back of my head, and moving me forward to place a quick kiss on my forehead. "What would I do without my fuck buddy? I already lost the sexy blonde babe to a bullet. Not you too!"

My fist connects with his chest. "You're disgusting." I playfully roll my eyes. "Do you know why this is happening? Are people really trying to kill me?"

He frowns. "Get used to it, Bella-boo. It comes with the title. We need to get you out of here."

Realization dawns on me.

Julian.

My stomach instantly churns from the anxiety.

"Wait, we need to go look Julian."

"Jesus Christ," Lorenzo groans, dropping his head in his hands. "So, you're finally being a decent human being again? I thought he was dead to you. Let's go."

He drags me by my arm, but I used all my strength to hold myself from moving. I didn't know what to think or how to feel, but I couldn't leave Julian alone. He wouldn't have even been here if it wasn't for me.

"Stop being brat!" Lorenzo growls, clearly frustrated. "Think about yourself. If you stay here, you could die. What's the point of doing all of this, just for you to die?"

My face scrunches up with disgust. "And you called me heartless? I can't believe you will just leave him here to die."

"Isabela," Enzo pleas. "He's a big boy. He can take care of yourself."

I groan. "We're wasting time. Please, just take my cousin out of this house and let me go search for him." I'm able to get two steps in before Lorenzo roughly grabs onto my wrist and stops me in place.

"I-I can't lose you, Bella-boo," Lorenzo croaks out, unwilling to let me go. "Not for him. Not for anyone."

His words of affection belt in my ears, and my emotions stir up in turmoil. I clench my eyes shut, and take a deep, steady breath. Why do I suddenly feel like Elena Gilbert? Everyone wants to keep me alive no matter what's at stake, but I honestly can't leave without Julian with me. My heart throbs in my chest just thinking of him dead somewhere.

"Please," I whisper, placing my hand over his. "Enzo, save my cousin. For me. I'll meet you out there. I promise."

He frowns. "You better not follow in Julian's footsteps of breaking every single promise known to man."

The somber moods grow lighthearted as Lorenzo carries Hernan bridal style to keep from inflicting more pain on him. Pausing mid-step, Lorenzo's dark eyebrows furrow as he inspects my cousin for a few seconds.

"Why is everyone from your family fucking hot?"

Slipping through the hallway, I hold my hand out in front of me to keep myself from bumping into anything and giving myself away. Most of the light has either been tampered with or flickers, giving me a second to gather my surroundings. I squint my eyes, but it's impossible to make out anything.

My hands feel around the walls, bumping into a knob. Biting my lip, I slowly turn the doorknob, and open to not a single soul. My heart knocks restlessly in my chest. He needs to be okay— he will be okay.

I find another knob.

Remaining perfectly still, I twist the knob as my body coils tight with dread.

Nothing.

Empty.

Five minutes later and I'm onto the last room on the first level.

The sound of something clashing to the ground fills my ears. My neck cranes to see the incident took place at the opposite end of the hall.

Someone is there.

My heart jackknifes in my chest and then begins to thud so hard it was almost painful.

Run.

All the alcohol has been drained from my body, or at least it feels like it was from how fast my reaction is, and I sprint to the other opening. Air floods out of my nostrils. Adrenaline flows through my vein.

I'm cut off by a large, rough, calloused hand wrapping around my mouth and another arm around my hips. A stillness washes over me. The stranger trails his finger down my cheek. A violent tremor shakes through me, and I open my mouth to release a scream, but he muffles it.

His nails dig deeper into my cheeks. "Don't worry I'm sure, you will like where we're heading."

I'm not dying tonight.

I muster up all my energy and fought against him with every ounce of power in my body. My frantic movement does nothing to phase him. I freaking hate this! He has the upper hand! How can I get myself out of his hold?

With a kick of his foot, he knocks one of the doors open and throws me in, on my knees. I hiss, the pain from the force of the fall on my knees slimmers. My eyes snap up, and my heart sinks to another dimension.

"J-Julian," I whimper, hoping for a response.

They have him tied to the chair in the middle of my bedroom. All his limbs are tied against the legs and arms of the chair. His head hangs down with the side of his forehead stain with blood. My voice evokes something in Julian because he coughs, spitting out a wad of dark liquid, and slowly cranes his head to face me.

His eyes.

They're hazy, glossed over, but he notices it's me.

I came back for you, Julian.

Like you would do for me.

An intense twist of my arms diverts my attention, and I hiss as I'm basically deemed limbless. I hold back my urge to cry. This isn't the time for me to whine like a bitch— I need to figure a way out of this. Who is even behind this? Who did this to Julian?

A dark laugh fills the silence as heels clink against the stone-tilted floors. Her bouncy strands of hair are the first thing that catches my attention and I instantly connect the dots. Julieta? What the hell does she want with me? And Julian.

She trails her long sequin acrylic nails across the slope of Julian's chiseled jaw. He shivers under her touch, trying to move away from her, but she grabs a handful of his hair and pulls his head up. I sob/gasp when she connects her knee with his face, sending a spit of blood to splash everywhere.

Sniffling, I squirm under the man's hold and try to escape us from our predicament.

"He's fine," Julieta interjects, rolling her eyes. "Besides, haven't you wanted to do that yourself? You know, for leaving you."

"Fuck you," I spat.

Julieta walks over to where I was kneeling, and bends down, seizing my chin and forcing me to look into her eyes. "Aww baby. Kiss me and maybe I will."

"J-Just let him go." I exhale heavily. "He has nothing to do with this. Kill me, but let him go."

Julieta shrieks, or should I say giggle? "Julian has everything to do with this, or has he failed to mention Clifford to you? He does like to keep a lot of secrets, doesn't he?" Julieta drops my face and sprints over to Julian. She shrugs, then pulls out a knife, implicating his gut. "Don't you, Julie? Answer me."

He grunts.

My heart sinks.

Fear prickles across my skin.

This might be the end for the both of us.

And he might die thinking I hate him when that's so far from the truth.

Julieta's expression is thunderous. "Don't you want to know what I'm doing here, Isabela? Go ahead, ask him. Ask him, who Clifford is."

On the outside, I succeeded in remaining impassive, but internally, I was shitting bricks. Is this Clifford guy someone I need to be afraid of? Or is Julieta trying to put a bigger wedge between Julian and me? I don't know what's true or not, but I know in some odd way I'm one of Julian's top priority. Despite if it has to do with his feeling for me, or his need to complete his job.

Julieta pouts. "Ugh, no fun." She sighs. "Isa, I'm here to deliver you on a nice, sliver platter."

"Okay," I say through gritted teeth. "Then let him go."

Julieta bites her lip. "About that... I can't let him leave this room alive."

My chest tightens.

"You don't scare me," I say with confidence.

She places a hand on her hip and glares down at me. "Baby, that's Clifford's job. Once he's done with you, you'll wished you stayed husband."

I swallow deeply.

"Before we go..." Julieta trails off, ripping the buttons off Julian's white button-up. "Let's say goodbye to this sexy piece of meat. How do you feel about Russian roulette?"

I clamp my mouth shut.

"Goddamn, you're literally so boring," Julieta says, loading up the pistol in her hand. She gives a barrel a swirl and aims the barrel in Julian's chest.

His forehead drops on mine. "They won't win, Isabela. I know in moments like these, you feel like that weak little girl, but you're not-- far from it. You've never been weak your entire life. Truthfully, I've never met anyone as remarkably strong as you. Isabela, you survived your father, brothers, sex trafficking, and Damien. You already won."

The only thing that conquers fear is the little happy moments in life. Life is worth living because of these moments. Life is worth fighting for because of the dreams I've yet to complete. I've given up on giving up. I won't step down. Julieta will not win this battle. A cold smile forms on my face.

The insane bitch is back, baby.

A strangled noise escapes the man's mouth when I contort my body in a way that allows my leg to lay a heavy kick on his face. He loses his balance and hold on me. I don't let the second go to waste. My eyes fixate on the pathetic excuse of a man on the floor, whimpering— this was almost too fucking easy.

Taking out the knife strapped to his abdomen, I toss it in the air and disarm him by thrusting it into his gut. His eyes widen in pain, and I twist the blade in his stomach, slicing him up.

Standing up, with the bloody knife in my hand, I make my way to Julieta. "Your turn."

Julian lifts his head.

His eyes bore into mine.

He has me in shackles.

And my awareness of everything vanishes.

Instead of going after Julieta, I turn my heel to the left and run into Julian's crumbling embrace. His head lolls to one side on my shoulder, and his breath tickles on my neck. My arms clutch onto him like there's no tomorrow.

"Isa..." he croaks. "L-Leave me. Don't die for me."

His fingers tremble against the side of my hip.

I realized I was witnessing a rare moment of vulnerability from Julian for the second time tonight, and my heart couldn't take the pressure. Everything inside me deflates and I shatter into pieces.

The sound of a gunshot rips through the air, stunning me to the core. My body tremors against his for impact. A coldness spreads through me, and I'm unable to hold myself. She shot me, didn't she? Another shot fires. From the corner of my eye, I catch a faint image of her bouncy curls on the ground. The doors burst open, but I can't move a single muscle.

Everything blurred together.

Hehehehehe I completed the chapter omg (applause for me) 🥹🥹I hope you guys spam me because I lowkey was dreading finishing this mainly because I'm going through concert depression

(Just saw my queen Sabrina and I'm so sad, missing her hours.)

But I've the next chapter up in a few days hehehe we're gearing up to the end of the story. Any bets? Any idea on what's next?

Love you guys 💕💕💕💕