Air: Nightflyer I want to sob.

Nightflyer: Okaaaay? Why?

Air: *holds up a chart*

Nightflyer: What-

Air: *points at chart with pointer stick* Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki both married their costars, although Jensen and Danneel started dating in 2006, and Jared and Gen didn't meet til either 2007 or 2008, depending on when filming for supernatural season 4 started-

Nightflyer: I-

Air: BUT BOTH couples got engaged in 2009, with Jared and Gen in October, and Jensen and Danneel in November.

Air: They also both got married the following year, with Jared in February, and Jensen in May.

Nightflyer: Why does this make you want to sob?

Air: *snaps pointing stick*

Air: BECAUSE JENSEN AND JARED ARE LIKE BROTHERS SO IMAGINE THE CONVERSATIONS THEY MUST HAVE HAD IN SEPTEMBER OF 2009 RIGHT BEFORE THEY DECIDED TO PROPOSE TO THEIR GIRLFRIENDS LIKE DO YOU THINK THEY COORDINATED THIS?? WHAT IF THEY SECRETLY PLANNED TO GET MARRIED AROUND THE SAME TIME, MY HEART-

Nightflyer:.........

Nightflyer: Air.

Air: Yes?

Nightflyer: For starters nobody asked for this information-

Air: Nobody ever asks for any sort of information. You just learn it along the way whether you want to or not.

Nightflyer: Secondly, I think you need to entertain the idea that you are stalking the cast of Supernatural.

Air: No I'm not, I don't even know where they live.

Air: I mean I THINK Misha's somewhere in Washington, but I'm not positive.

Air: And technically I can narrow down Jensen and Jared's addresses to a 272 mile radius- BUT THAT'S STILL A LOT OF SPACE!

Nightflyer: You need help. Go see a therapist.

Air: I am seeing a therapist, you and Rainkeeper forced me, remember?

Nightflyer: And?

Air: And she talks about chickens a lot and her dog is cute.

Nightflyer: I think we should get you a different therapist.

Air: Please don't I like the one I have. She helped me find Ten Inch Hero online so I could watch it!

Nightflyer: And how was it?

Air: A M A Z I N G, it's our next date night movie. It has a lot of romance.

Nightflyer: SOLD.

*players appear*

Joy: Alright Air, it's the LAST SUPERNATURAL HELL PART. So get ALL your references out now cause we're gonna cut back on them a lot once this madness ends.

Air: But I can still freak out over it if it goes canon in another language, right?

Joy: Yes, we're just not going to go to this level over it again.

Air: Well in that case....

Air: Let's see-

Air: There are three nude photos of Misha Collins on the internet, I know of all of them, good luck finding them though,

Air: There's a large ship going around involving Misha Collins and Bill Clinton, and that's the fourth time a president has been involved in Supernatural, the first being that Obama ships Destiel, the second being Trump helping the Leviathans, and the third being that time Lucifer possessed the president and Sam and Dean tried to kill him and instead got sent to mac security prison- a WONDERFUL episode.

Air: I've seen pictures of Misha and Gerard Way together, I desperately need context. I've also seen pictures of Misha punching William Shatner, so I honestly cannot wait until Misha writes an autobiography because I need answers.

Air: Dean sings six songs that I know of in the show- I'm too Sexy for my Shirt, I can't fight this feeling anymore, Eye of the tiger, All Out of Love, Dead or Alive, and that kinda country song he sings in the episode in season 15 where he acts like Patrick Swayze.

Air: Dean and Cas canonically have movie nights, they've seen Tombstone- Jack has a teddy bear, I think out of all the characters Charlie has the most tragic backstory and Crowley has the funniest, Crowley once dressed in a hawaiian shirt and licked the floor clean, Dean said "meat man" on multiple occasions and wore cuffed jeans, Supernatural predicted the toilet paper crisis during the Coronavirus, Cas was originally supposed to be God, Missouri Moseley was supposed to be the character Bobby Singer became, God had multiple boyfriends and dated and killed Sam's ex wife- ADAM WAS IN HELL FOR TEN SEASONS, and I've recently become convinced that Jody and Donna are in a relationship and have six adopted children, you cannot convince me otherwise. Dean owns and has worn booty shorts. Cas ate toothpaste, Jack wandered around naked for the better part of his first episode, and Sam wanted a dog for his entire life and when Dean finally agreed to get one, the dog liked Dean better.

Air: The worst two relationships on the show were Jody and Bobby and Sam and Amelia, the best ones were Dean and Cas, Sam and Eileen, and Bobby and Ellen.

Air: Sam married Eileen, the pre-COVID idea for the ending was better but they made due with what they could, I will ship Destiel to my dying day and IT IS CANON and some people can rewatch this show hundreds of times but every time an episode comes on my heart hurts in such a way cause it refuses to go on that emotional journey again but at the same time I always end up watching it because I can't look away.

Air: Okay. I'm good now.

Rainkeeper: When was the last time we ranted about Wings of Fire like this?

Seashell: Middle school...?

Carnelian: DO WE EVEN HAVE TO BE HERE OR ARE YOU JUST GOING TO CHAT AMONGST YOURSELVES THE WHOLE DAY?

Hosts: *jump*

Kelp: JEEZ! Carnelian!  WARN ME before you talk!

Carnelian: Prick.

Joy: Territorial Fae bastard.

Carnelian: What?

Joy: SORRY I'VE BEEN REREADING SO MUCH SARAH J MAAS WAITING FOR ACOTAR 5.

Moon: What are we doing today?

Nightflyer: Well we figured it was only right to close out the Supernatural dares the same way Supernatural itself likes to close.

Seashell: So Winter, we need you to sing Carry On Wayward Son as a final send off.

Winter: I don't sing.

All: *shoves swords in Winter's face*

Winter: *dancing on a bartop*

Winter: I HAVE DREAM LIKE YOU, NO REALLY! JUST MUCH LESS TOUCHY-FEELY, THEY MAINLY HAPPEN SOMEWHERE WARM AND SUNNY-

Winter: On an island that I own, tanned, rested, and alone-

Joy: *grabs him*

Winter: SURROUNDED BY ENORMOUS PILES OF MONEY! 

Joy: *throws him*

Seashell: *sigh* I love Tangled.

Rainkeeper: Such a good movie.

Air: WINNIE. SING THE SONG.

Winter: UUUGGGGHHHH-

Air: *shoots over to talk directly into his face*

Air: And sing it in a way that will make my fandom proud or I'll tear off your nipples and shove them up your nose.

Winter: My- I- What?

Air: There is no rhymn or reason to what I do, a skiddly boo- OH! Maybe there is a rhymn!

Nightflyer: Air spell rhyme.

Air: R-H-Y-M-N-E-N-M-E-E?

Nightflyer: *sighs*

Rainkeeper: *clicks play on boombox*

Winter: Carry on, my wayward son-

Air: *bursts into tears*

Winter: There'll be peace when you are done

Air: THERE WAS, THERE FINALLY WAS.

Winter: Lay your weary head to rest

Air: I DON'T KNOW HOW-

Winter: Don't you cry no more

Air: HOW DO I STOP CRYING???

Qibli: *hits the drums*

Amber: *guitar solo*

All: *starts jamming out*

https://youtu.be/qKvj12YTtI4

Winter: Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion
I was soaring ever hiiiigher
But I flew too high

Turtle: *plays piano*

Winter: Though my eyes could see, I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think, I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreeeaming
I can hear them saaaaaaaaaay

https://youtu.be/wqaPYoUcQBs

Winter: Carry on, my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more

https://youtu.be/FD5VUPwJ9-0

Winter: Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the eveent of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know

Turtle: *pianos*

Winter: On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about, I'm like a ship on the ocean

Air: That, right there, sums it all up.

Winter: I set a course for winds of fortune
But I hear the voices saaaaaaay

https://youtu.be/HopOP2Djdu8

Winter: Carry on my wayward sooooon
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more, NO!

*epic instrumental part*

https://youtu.be/OhRjZ-pgUvs

Winter: Carry on, you will always remeeeember
Carry on, nothing EQUALS THE SPLENDOR
Now your life's no longer eeeeempty
SURELY HEAVEN WAITS FOR YOOOOUUUUUU

https://youtu.be/KG1ZR3aLs6U

Winter: Carry on, my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry, don't you cry no more

https://youtu.be/Gtmw0DWEsU0

Hosts: *raise a lighter in the air*

Air: Joy you're not allowed to pick on him for five dares.

Joy: WHAT! WHY?!!?!?!?

Air: Because that was BEAUTIFUL.

Winter: Thanks.

Air: *hugs him*

Winter: What- no- I DID NOT CONSENT TO BE TOUCHED.

Air: IT'S  H A P P E N I N G.

Winter: *screeches*