I Like Chimkin (J.W.)


Air: *screaming*

Joy: *somersaults into the room and point a gun*

Joy: WHERE'S THE DANGER?

Air: *clutches laptop* CUTE DOGGIE VIDEOS

Joy:.......

Joy: *puts gun away* I don't get paid enough for this.

Nightflyer: SHOW ME THE DOGGO VIDEOS.

https://youtu.be/Mwk9COqFzEA

Air/Nightflyer: *flails about cause doggo cuteness*

Rainkeeper: *watches video*

Rainkeeper: And you idiots got a cat.

Air: DO NOT INSULT SIR SERGEANT KEVIN!

Rainkeeper: He has a ranking now?

Air: IN THE AIR FORCE, YES.

Rainkeeper: You mean the Force that has done absolutely nothing for probably over a year?

Air:......We will update WHEN WE ARE NEEDED.

*players appear*

Amber: I don't think we've celebrated pride month enough around here so QUICK EVERYONE WHOSE YOUR FAVORITE LGBTQIAP+ CHARACTER?

Joy: Mor from ACOTAR! Or Aedion from TOG- WAIT I CAN'T CHOOSE. BOTH OF THEM.

Air: Bitch did you really have to ask?

Air: *unfurls poster*

Air: *dramatically gestures*

Nightflyer: I think she meant canonically gay-

Air: AND YOUR POINT IS?

Nightflyer: Fair enough.

Nightflyer: I'm gonna pick Jemilla and Zazzalil from Firebringer

Rainkeeper: The goddess that is Liz Taylor in American Horror Story Hotel.

Kelp: Thomas Sanders.

Joy: Fictional characters, babe.

Kelp:....MEPHISTO AND GABRIEL SANDERS.

Kelp: I love them.

Seashell: Well, since ATLA is making such a comeback for some unknown reason, I'll say Korra.

Seashell: OH WAIT AND ROY AND ARCHIE FROM HOLLYWOOD.

Amber: *wipes tear* I'm so proud, both that you all picked people of different sexualities, and that no one could decide on just one besides Rainkeeper.

Rainkeeper: Buddy, you listen to Liz Taylor and just try to pick someone over her, I DARE you.

Rainkeeper: My angsty bald queen. 

Air: I think you've been watching too much American Horror Story.

Rainkeeper: YOU DON'T THINK I KNOW THAT?!?!?!

Turtle: Wait, Amber who's your favorite character?

Amber: Oh, I thought it was obvious.

Winter: Yourself-

Amber: CARNELIAN! *throws skittles*

Carnelian:....Why are you like this.

Amber: Because my new goal in life is to make Liz Taylor proud.

Rainkeeper: Such a great goal....

Moon: Now what?

Joy: QUICK KINKAJOU, DO THE CHICKEN DANCE AS FAST AS YOU CAN!

Kinkajou: OKAY!

Kinkajou: *aggressively chicken dances really fast*

Turtle: How long does she have to do this for?

Nightflyer: Until we feel like making her stop.

Kinkajou: I DON'T WANNA BE A CHICKEN, I DON'T WANNA BE A DUCK, SO I SHAKE MY BUTT AT PIZZA HUT.

Turtle: That's why we're not allowed at Pizza Hut anymore, remember?

Kinkajou: WORTH IT!

Moon: *facetalons*

Air: Winter, you have to tell us why you like everyone.

Winter: Wait what?

Rainkeeper: That's your dare. Why do you like everyone?

Winter:.......WHY WOULD ANY OF YOU EVER THINK I LIKED YOU?

Qibli: Well jeez Winter, it's not like we're MARRIED OR ANYTHING.

Winter: SO?

Moon: You seemed to like us on the honeymoon

Winter: YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I LIKE!

Qibli: Let's see- your brother, being angsty and mean to everyone who cares about you, being tougher than you actually are, I wanna say art-

Winter: SHUDDUP!

Joy: Cut the crap, Winnie. We know at least tolerate everyone here. Just tell us why.

Air: Oh! You should include us hosts too. That'd be fun.

Winter: I'm not getting out of this, am I?

Kelp: *waves shotgun* Nope!

Winter: *laughs* What? YOU'RE going to shoot me?

Kelp: *hands shotgun to Joy*

Winter: ALRIGHT! SO!

Winter:.......Kinkajou I guess I like you cause you attacked my sister that one time and it was actually amazing.

Kinkajou: *still chicken dancing* Awwwwww, THANKS WINNIE!

Winter: Don't any of you let this stuff go to your head, I don't mean any of it.

Joy: *clears throat*

Winter: Urrrrggghhhhh

Qibli: Don't worry, Win, we won't take it that seriously.

Qibli: Although I can't wait to hear what you like about me.

Winter: Amber I like that you fought in the war. Gives you character.

Amber: You like that I watched your sister kill my sister?

Winter:........Yeah sure.

Air: BOOOOOOOOO!

Joy: GIVE A BETTER ANSWER!

Winter: I hate ALL OF YOU!

Rainkeeper: Boo, you whore.

Winter: GO TO HELL, YOU UNSTABLE ALCOHOLIC!

Rainkeeper: Can you hear this? Do you need me to turn it up? *flips Winter off*

Winter: *long suffering groan*

Winter: Fine. Amber, I like that you're always yourself and don't give a shit what others think.

Amber: *has started chicken dancing with Kinkajou*

Amber: Thank you, Winter. 

Winter: Turtle I like that you don't try to impress anyone.

Turtle:.......Okay.

Winter: And that even though you hate being a main character, you stepped up to the challenge when the rest of us couldn't even if you were STILL A GIANT ASS COWARD.

Turtle: I- I don't think you know how a compliment sandwich works.....

Winter: Carnelian, I literally know next to nothing about you, there's nothing I like or don't like about you.

Carnelian: Fair enough.

Kelp: NOPE! You have to say something.

Winter:......You burned with dignity?

Carnelian: I'll take it.

Winter: Moon, I admire how you were able to stay sane for so long and that you don't judge everyone based on what they think. And that you're pretty.

Moon: I love you too , stupid.

Winter: That was NOT A DECLARATION OF LOVE.

Moon: Uh huh.

Winter: And Qibli-

Qibli: Yes?

Winter: I like...............

Winter:..........*looks like the words cause him physical pain to say*

Winter:.........I.... like.....Qibli.

Qibli: I'm sorry, what?

Winter: I LIKE QIBLI! OKAY!

Winter: I LIKE YOU AS A WHOLE, ESPECIALLY YOUR AGGRAVATING, STUPID INTELLIGENCE AND YOUR STUPID FRECKLED FACE.

Qibli: Awwwww

Winter: I HATE YOU THOUGH.

Qibli: Just admit I'm your bae

Winter: NEVER.

Qibli: I love you.

Moon: This. This is why I'm the third wheel.

Winter: NOT TRUE.

Qibli: Give up, Moon. THERE IS NO THIRD WHEEL IN QINTERWATCHER AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kinkajou: *chicken dancing* CAN I STOP NOW?

Hosts: NO!

Winter: I like Nightflyer's dedication to Air.

Nightflyer: Much appreciated.

Winter: I like Air's optimism and dedication to Supernatural.

Air: See guys? It's a DEDICATION. NOT AN ADDICTION.

Rainkeeper: That's not what the therapist said.

Joy: You nearly killed me because of it.

Nightflyer: You forced small children to cut hair.

Kelp: You verbally and physically threatened people and forced them to drive you places over 2 hours away.

Air:........D E D I C A T I O N.

Winter: I like how Joy gives no fucks.

Joy: Not one. I was born without them.

Winter: I like how Kelp somehow has no desire to kill Joy yet.

Kelp: Why would I do that?

Winter:.........Okay, you are either really freaking dumb, oblivious as hell, or just crazy.

Kelp: I prefer the term insane.

Winter:.......Yeah, THAT.

Winter: I like how Rainkeeper is the mom friend. It's amusing.

Rainkeeper: I AM NOT A MOM FRI-

All: YES YOU ARE.

Winter: And I like how Seashell is the only one who actually organizes anything in this game and is likely the only one doing any real work, although nobody seems to pay attention to that.

Seashell: See THIS IS WHY I HAD A CRUSH ON YOU, YOU ASSHOLE.

Moon: I would say there's room for more, but Winter already has his mistress and so does Qibli, and I'm really just not interested in you so I'm afraid there's no spots left.

Seashell: Yeah, I don't want a place in that trainwreck anyways, not the point.

Rainkeeper: SEE WINTER, YOU CAN BE NICE! IT'S NOT THAT HARD!

Winter: *bleeding from the effort it took to be kind for this long*

Kinkajou: *chicken dances as Winter passes out*

Carnelian:........Wait, Amber, are you Qibli's mistress?

Amber: Yes.

Carnelian: But WHY-

Amber: To quote the wise words of the Lumineers,

Amber: Damn your wife, I'd be your mistress just to have you around.

Carnelian: Ah, okay.

Moon: Should we call a doctor for Winter?

Joy: Nah, he's fine.

Turtle: I think his skull is collapsing.....

Joy: Just fine.

All:...........

All: *shrugs and chicken dances around Winter's unconscious body*

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