April 30th, 2018
Monday, 9:03am

Amin sat at his desk, poring over documents in his hand and on his computer—his concentration unbroken. He had his earpiece in his ears to drown out all conflicting sounds and worked towards the deadline that he set for himself. Three hours had gone by, and they came and met him in the chair that he currently sat in. “Okay, this is right…six thousand eight fifty…30kva generator…wait, six thousand?” he leaned back in his seat and tapped his temple with the pencil that he was wielded. “Chisom, let me see the price book, please.”

Chisom, who was hunched over another desk in Amin’s office, delivered the book promptly as she had been using it. They were working together, finalizing all of the documents from three months of sales. “Here.” She went to stand beside him and he removed one of his earpieces.

“Thanks.” He knew where to go so a few flips and a little finger trailing gave him what he was searching for. “Who made this sale? This is almost twenty percent off,” he tapped the pink paper on the table.

“Mr. Khalil did. It’s one of his friends from MnG Gold.”

Amin nodded in realization. “Makes sense. Okay, um. Did you receive the confirmation email from Ghasif?”

She shook her head. “I checked early this morning, nothing. Let me make sure.”

“Don’t bother, I’ll just call him. I’m finally done with this though, so just get it from your mail and print for the auditor. He should be coming in tomorrow, but Khalil might want to take a look at them.” He shifted in his seat, and grabbed his phone off the table.

“Okay sir.”

“And Chisom?”

“Yeah?” she turned to him, with her papers in her hand. She had worn a red dress today and a black leather jacket over it, her hair held loosely at the back of her head in a hairband.

“Are you good? With Bassam back and all…”

She smiled and lowered her head. “I’m fine, Amin. I can handle him.”

Amin just nodded, and watched her walk out. He seriously doubted her statement, based on what he saw daily. Bassam was barely back and he hit the ground flirting. When he had met her a few years back as an intern, he made it a regular thing to go out of his way to make her feel special. She had looked at it as him taking a special interest in her until she saw him act the same way to a few other ladies. Normally, he wouldn’t meddle in his friend’s affairs but Chisom was a trusted member of their staff and he didn’t want to lose her because of ‘heartbreak.’ That would be a terrible loss for the company. He wasn’t sure that Bassam understood that, and he planned to bring the topic up later.

“Amin? The girl Mr. Alex recommended to help me is here for her interview,” Chisom said through the slightly opened door.

“Bassam will be here soon, let him handle it. I’m busy with something else. Oh and…please get Robert for me.”

“Okay sir.”

He checked his phone after he heard his door shut. No messages, no calls, nothing. Jessica kissed him goodnight at eight pm the night before and he hadn’t seen or heard from her since. She insisted that she wanted to sleep alone because she had a lot of work to do. While that was part of the reason, he knew that she was mad at him and frustrated also. He took full responsibility for how shallow they were, and she just followed his lead. She didn’t want to be the only one giving and not receiving, or at least that’s how he saw it. And they were in the middle of something that neither of them planned for.

Sighing, he dialed her number and leaned back in his seat. The phone rang and rang, with no answer until the very last one.

“Hey, morning.” She sounded stressed and tired. Normally that would be understandable, but it was nine in the morning.

“Good morning. Did you get any sleep?”

“I couldn’t. Had a deadline for six am. Now the paper has been printed and it’s being distributed. That would be my cue to relax in my big editor chair but no, all the writers of the articles that got rejected decided to gang up on me this morning. I tried being nice while clutching a huge cup of black coffee—yes black, desperate times call for desperate measures—but they wouldn’t listen to the woman in the grey pant suit, emphasis on woman. This doesn’t happen with the editor when he’s here, at all. But they felt like when they raise their voices a little, I’d get intimidated. So I proved that I have a voice too! Oh, I raised it to the ceiling and sent everybody back to the cubicles. Now I feel bad,” she finished and took a deep breath. “But how’s your morning though?”

“Um, well? Not that interesting but a little stressful. Are you sure you’re okay, babe? Do you want anything? I can send Robert with the car, just name it. If I didn’t have a lot to do, I’d come myself.” He looked towards the door when it opened and Bassam strolled in, with a coffee holder in one hand. Robert came in after him, but the reason that he was called was in Bassam’s hand so Amin waved him away.

“I already sent for breakfast, but you’re sweet though. I’ll be fine, just need to close my eyes a bit.”

“Is that Jessica?” Bassam reached for the phone but Amin kept it out of reach. He pouted and stopped trying. Amin just rolled his eyes.

“Can you do that in the office?”

“That’s highly unprofessional. Besides, they love to barge in and demand stuff, the entitled brats. Was that Bassam though?  Please say morning.”

“Just lock the door, keep them out. Yes, it’s Mr. annoying. Didn’t you two exchange numbers or something?”

“Oh yeah, I just remembered that I can do that. We did, just let me talk to him a little, pleasee.”

Amin looked up at Bassam’s smug expression and shook his head. He could swear that he had heard what she said. “Hurry up.” He handed the phone to him and waited patiently.

“Morning baby girl,” he winked at Amin and exited the office so his friend couldn’t hear their conversation. The computer didn’t fail to capture his attention once more, and he started to add finishing touches on the records that he was preparing to send to Beirut.

Khalil would certainly be happy with him today, he seemed to be in a good mood from the night before. It was quite expected because his wife was due in the country by Wednesday. Amin had never met a couple more in love than his parents. And the disturbing part was that they didn’t love each other when they got married. They did it out of respect and duty to their families, but his mom was always soft towards him. When he finally saw her ten years later, Amin had already been born. They found every way to send time together, taking little trips to different countries every year.

As far as Amin was concerned, his mother and Bassam were the only two people who could tell his father off and get away with it. His hotheadedness didn’t seem to work around his zawja. She knew the influence that she had over him, but she barely used it. Not even to let Amin get his way. He smiled at the thought, grateful that he was seeing her in two days.

He had finally decided to tell her about Jessica and explain his feelings to her so she could give him some well needed advice. If anybody would understand, his mother would.

“Amin,” Bassam entered the office hurriedly and leaned against the door, peeking outside. “Some boy is in Chisom’s office and she’s laughing like he invented freaking Christmas. Do you know about it?”

The image of him spying on their secretary sent Amin into a fit of laughter. It was rare for anything or anyone to really capture Bassam’s attention so he knew that this was worth paying attention to. “Are you being serious right now?”

“Is this even allowed? She shouldn’t be having visitors while at work. This is the sort of thing that pisses Khalil off,” he was still peeking through the half closed door. “I should tell her right? I shouldn’t have to, anyway. She’s been here way too long to be pulling stunts like this.”

“Give her a break, she’s been here since seven thirty. And the store opens at eight thirty? We’ve both been working on the documents and now that it’s done, let her breathe. Sit down.”

He closed the door and dropped into the chair opposite Amin’s, rubbing his face. “Just saying.”

“Sure. When are you going to tell her how you feel?” Amin gave the picture of being focused on his laptop but he was observing Bassam keenly. He sat up with a start, then give a nervous chuckle.

“What are you going on about? Feeling what? For Chisom?”

“Yes, that one. The one in her office right now being chummy with the guy that you wish you could throw out. That Chisom.”

“Nahhhhh,” he drawled and held his hands in the air, shaking his head. He tried to keep his face blank, but Amin knew him too well. He sucked at hiding his feelings, between him and a wide open book Amin couldn’t decide which was easier to read.

“Yeahhhhh, okay. You’ll figure yourself out. By the way, the girl who was scheduled for an interview is here. Can you do it? I’m busy.”

“Busy prying into other people’s private lives? Sure, I’ll handle it.” Bassam said with a slight frown. He stood up and took a cup of coffee out of the holder.

“What? Did that just come out of you? The king of prying? Go do the interview, you need to get the hypocrisy out of your system.” Amin stifled a laugh when Bassam glowered at him before leaving the office.

****

“Did you call Jess?” Bassam said over the table to Amin, nursing his third bottle of Corona Extra. They sat on the porch of the little club, watching different girls come and go, many of them ogling at Bassam and him. They had been there for three hours and the lights were beginning to hurt Amin’s eyes.

“Yeah. Said she was tired and didn’t want company, and that she would try to see me tomorrow.” Amin took a swig of his Heineken and placed it back on the table. “She’s mad, a very controlled kind of anger but still.”

“She knows what she wants, man. And what you’re giving her isn’t it. At all. I’m not saying I told you so though.” He smiled at a girl that waved at him before going into the multicolored club, due to its many flashing lights.

“You literally just did,” Amin shook his head at him, “besides, you of all people should understand. It’s not easy to go against Khalil or tradition. That’s a death wish.”

“You’re just paranoid over nothing. And what do you mean me of all people? This has nothing to do with me.”

Amin shot him a look. “Right. The sooner you confess that you like Chisom, the quicker we can move on with this conversation. You’re not doing anything about it because of certain reasons.”

“You’re wrong.”

“Which part? You know you’re not allowed to lie to me right?”

Bassam sighed and leaned back in his high chair. He tilted the bottle, and watched the tiny droplets of water slink down its side and on to the table. “Admitting that I like her is out of the question. That makes it real. I’m not ready for all that. Tonight is about you and your messed up love life. Let’s stay on track.”

“It’s already real. The picture of you spying on her lives in my phone, but okay. I brought it up to make a point anyway.”

“And that point is?” Bassam ignored his previous words with a straight face, solidifying his decision of not talking about anything concerning Chisom.

“You have reasons. I do too. Between my father, my beliefs and my family, anything that I have with Jessica is basically screwed.”

“Do I need to remind you that you’re a twenty seven year old man who can make his own decisions? You made one, years ago. You let Khalil control your movements and decisions, in the name of work. That was your decision, Amin.”

Amin cut him off. “You don’t understand, and you’re not trying to. This is so different, Bas. Khalil has no problem with me being with Jessica, even though he’s annoyed by it. He thinks that it’s a phase and that I have ‘acquired a taste for Liberian women.’ What do you think telling him that its more than that will do? Being an independent man as you say doesn’t cover tradition, you know it doesn’t.”

“Define more,” he leaned forward and rested his arms on the table. “Don’t hide anything. Just say it like it is.”

Amin rubbed his face and looked over Bassam’s shoulder, biting his lower lip. “Jessica is…celibate. He thinks that I’m with her because the sex is different, to be very crude. She has never done it and she doesn’t plan to anytime soon. So it’s not because of that. She’s just…Jess has helped me to see that there is a world outside of my computer, the one she’s in. Between work and Khalil, I had no life. You know that, I was living vicariously through you. None of it interested me enough to get me to leave my laptop. Until her.  I like everything about her, she’s just amazing. She’s crazy, she’s smart, she’s real. She cares about me more than she cares to admit. Those rare moments before we fall asleep together—when she shows me the side of her that she keeps hidden behind her confidence and nonchalant statements—I live for them. I love what we have and I don’t plan to let it go anytime soon. She’s as scared as I am but yet every day we get closer and closer. I plan everything in my life, it helps me to save time. But meeting her was the most spontaneous that has happened to me up to date. I just…I don’t know.”

Bassam watched him, amused. His sluggish stance had changed into an attentive one. “Wow. This is really something. I mean, I suspected a little but not this much. And you’re claiming not to know? You know exactly what you feel.”

“I…think I’m in love with her. And that realization is terrifying.”

Bassam smiled widely and slammed both palms on the table, before laughing. “You’re screwed with a capital S.”

Glossary

Zawja— wife

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