May 1st, 2018
Wednesday, 7:31pm

Amin sat on the steps of the front porch with his hands extended in front of him. Waiting. For what, he wasn’t sure but he preferred away from the noise than in it. His mom was finally here, and everything that Khalid wanted to happen happened. The distant family of theirs that were set up and working in different counties in the country all showed up to welcome her. He had been forced to converse all evening, skipping the party wasn’t something that was going to happen, even if he had tried. But even in the midst of everything, he missed her terribly. Jessica was being as understanding as she could be, but he knew that she didn’t like what was going on. And unfortunately, there was nothing he could do about it.

Bassam’s car pulled into the yard and parked a few paces away from him. He stood up when the car’s engine switched off and walked over.

“She’s mad at me, isn’t she?”

Bassam just shook his head and placed his feet on the ground but remained in the driver’s seat. “I don’t know and I’m not getting into it.”

“Since when? You stick your nose into everything.”

Bassam got out of the car and locked the door, then walked over to where Amin was sitting. He followed and they both sat in silence for a few minutes. And as the minutes ticked by, Amine grew more self-conscious.

“I should have been there for her,” Amin said quietly, staring down at his shoes. “I didn’t try to find a way out of this, and there’s always one.”

“Well…you should call her. Or something. She misses you.” Bassam stared up at the stars with more interest in it than in the conversation he was having with his friend.

“I know you have something to say, so say it. You’re being weird.”

“The last time I butted in your business, you almost took my head off, remember? Me and my observing eyes are going to be quiet this time around. But listen. I know this is hard for you, you’re all stressed and edgy about it. But you can talk to all the people you want about this, it’s not going to help. You’re the one who’s with Jessica. So talk to her, hear her thoughts and listen to each other. It’ll help you more than you think.”

Amin sighed and fiddled with his fingers. “It’s really not that simple, Bas. I know I should…talk to her, and I would, if I knew what to say. This is not some small issue that can be resolved in a few hours, it’s huge. We’re talking about my family here. And hers. Everything I have with her is being frowned upon by everyone around us. How do I deal with that?”

“Like I said, you’re with her. And she’s with you. Not with your family or everybody else. Because of the end of the day, it boils down to just the two of you. So see it that way.”

The door behind them opened, letting out the music that had been trapped behind it. The light overheard illuminated Amin’s mom who stood by the door silently. They both got to their feet and walked over to her, dusting off their pants. Bassam walked slower, and stood on the side of them when he finally approached.

“Amin. I came to find you, we haven’t been alone long enough to talk. Are you…busy?” She looked Bassam up and down in obvious dislike and pulled her grey shawl around her shoulders, parts of her hair fluttering in the breeze.

“I was just about to leave actually, I have somewhere to be,” Bassam said nervously, barely getting a nod from her. “Have a lovely evening, Mrs. Azam. Amin.”

“I’ll call you later, man.” They exchanged a look then Bassam turned to leave.

“I wasn’t talking to him, but okay,” she pursed her lips and stared at his retreating figure. The look on her face was both funny and disturbing. She was a generally happy woman, until she didn’t like someone.

“Mom, you know he’s harmless right?” He held her hand and led her up the stairs on the side of the corridor that led to the top of the house. The fresh paint fumes were faint in the air but it wasn’t enough to be a bother. Khalid had fixed up everything that he thought needed fixing.

“I don’t know why your father insists on having him around. I don’t like him.” He sat in one of the wooden chairs that overlooked the balcony when they reached the top. It was a small, rectangular space with a triangular overhead which was decorated with small, yellow bulbs that hung low.  “If anything bad was happening, you would let me know, wouldn’t you?”

“Bassam is not your husband’s son. I’ll keep telling you until you believe me. And you know I don’t lie to you.” She made a sound in her throat and turned away from him. “Right? Mom.”

“Of course, of course,” she waved her hand in the air then leaned towards him and took one of his hands in hers. “So what’s been going on with you? Khalil doesn’t look too happy with you. But he wouldn’t tell me why.”

“Yeah, well… that’s what I want to talk to you about as well. It’s really important to me and I need your advice.”

She smiled softly and sat back in her chair. “I’m listening.”

Amin exhaled and clasped his hands in front of him. “Okay, so… I’m just gonna say it. I’m seeing someone. It’s…” He trailed off and risked a glance at her.

“Go on.”

“She’s a Liberian and…we’ve been dating for eight months.” He waited for her response with a feeling of dread. A positive answer was not expected but it was certainly hoped for.

“I see. Is it serious?”

“I’d like to think so,” he smiled sheepishly under her scrutinizing gaze. “Eight months is a really long time. Especially for me.”

“True. She must be really special. Any girl who can get you away from your computer and work is a magician in my world,” she laughed a little. “I know you’re waiting for a long lecture from me, but I honestly have nothing to say. At least not what you’re expecting.”

He looked taken aback. “That’s a bit surprising. What about the traditions and stuff?”

She shrugged and sat up straighter in her chair. “Your father has his reasons to sticking to those, and he has the right to enforce it also. It’s his family. But what I care about is your happiness. And if this girl is doing the job, I’m satisfied.”

“She is. I really hope you get to meet her, if you would like that.”

“Of course, I’d be delighted. I should warn you though; my approval doesn’t mean that I’ll side with you on this when your father opposes it.”

“But—”

“Family comes first, Amin. Always. And that means I have to support my husband, I can’t be against him in front of people. Now, in private is a different matter, but you need to stand on your own two feet for this one. You’re grown, I can’t keep fighting your battles with your father for you.”

He groaned and sat back in the chair, staring at the sky. She was right about everything, but it was still unnerving. He’s never stood up to his father for anything in his life, and the first time seemed to grow more terrifying with each passing day.

“Is this really that important to you? It doesn’t make sense to fight him on something that could break apart in a few days or weeks, Amin.”

“Mom, I don’t even know how to describe how much Jessica means to me. What I feel when I’m around her is…too amazing for words. She has become a crucial part of my life, and I don’t think that there’s anything I wouldn’t do for her. It scares me but…that’s where I am.”

“And she feels what you feel?” Her voice had gone quiet.

“I guess so. She doesn’t really show her feelings that often. She doesn’t want to get hurt.” And neither do I.

“I understand. What does she do?”

“She’s a journalist for one of the national newspapers. Front Page.”

“Oh, I know that one. I think Khalil’s on the board. That’s really nice. Have you met her family?”

“Ah, not really. Her mom isn’t too fond of me.”

“That was…expected. The hatred between Liberians and the Lebanese is mutual. How you managed to fall in love with one is astounding.”

“I’m not…what makes you think that I’m…I didn’t say I was—”

“It’s kinda obvious, don’t you think? Even in the way you talk about her. I just hope you know what you’re doing.”

He groaned and shook his head, then rubbed his face. “I have no idea, actually. It’s a little overwhelming. It genuinely feels like we’re not going to last. And that’s scary to think about.”

“Figure it out. This is your life, baby. You have to start fighting for what you want, or other people will keep making decisions for you. Do you understand?”

He did understand. The fear of standing up to his father was looming, but it was only because he was cowering. If he stood up on his own two feet, it wouldn’t be as scary. I hope. “Yes ma’am.”

“Good. You also understand that parts of this conversation didn’t happen, right?”

He laughed at her sly wink, then stood up and extended his hand. “Of course. Not a word will be said.”

“Excellent.”

Their walk down the stairs was filled with her chattering away about news from home, but he was finding it hard to concentrate. It had been a lot of hours since he saw her. Or touched her. And the thought was really weird to him but, even the way she smelled, he missed it.

When the talking halted, he responded in all the right ways and followed her into the house—his mind still far away from the conversation. Instead, it was making plans on spending time with her as soon as possible.

•Heyyaa•