Name of the book: A Bloody Revenge

Name of the author: prettycool1106

Chapters reviewed: 5

Reviewer: Apple

Plot:

This is a crime investigation type of book.
Here at first it starts with a normal scence where all the officers were chilling in the beureo. Senior inspector Rajveer and Naveen were telling stories about their academy days to their juniors. After a funny session of laughter and telling them some of the hilarous acts they did as a cadet , a call came from a hotel manager saying them about person who wasn't opening his door nor answering the call from past twelve hours. After reaching the crime spot they find a dead body just near the door as soon as they opened it. They started their investigation and came upon a conclusion that the person died due to suffocation. This made the officers suspious. ACP Pradyuman came upon a plan to send rajveer in a diguise of a tourist in that same hotel to catch the murderer red handed. Everything was done according to their plan but the criminal was much ahead of them. The murderer tried to suffocate him in his car but rajveer was saved from this as he broke the window shield and soon naveen with his other officers admitted him to the hospital. Here Dr Salunkhe and Dr Shalini  checked the car and found a weird freshner which was taken to be tested. Rajveer got his conciousness back and was soon was discharged from the hospital.

Positive aspects:

The plot of the story is good but it can be much better. I love the way to tried to show the bond between two characters : Naveen and Rajveer. I like way to tried to add some light hearted jokes during the investigation.

Negative aspects:

The author do have amazing writing skills but you still need to work on it. You can use different types of pronouns and adjectives.

Instead of " Ya...haaaa" replied naveen.
You can say " Naveen laughed ".

I suggest you to give some imaginary name to the hotel instead of Xyz as it looks doesn't look good as xyz hotel.
In chapter one , i think the conversation between shalini and the manager over phone was not needed to be shown as i find it meaningless , you could have just said that they just conversation.

The book do need some editing as there are many spelling and grammartical mistakes.

Your plot do have some loop holes like why will the manager call the police first as he already have the other key of the room. He could have first opened it but still waited for the police like a dumb. I found this illogical as it's not like everyday we encounter with such incidents and the manager should have that curiosity of what must have happened that his guest didn't opened nor pick up the call for 12 hours.

I appreciate the way you tried to explain us the scenes with pictures but it's not always needed as it make it look un presentable. Even if you use the pictures , just try to use in a correct way so it doesn't looks messy.
I suggest you to use " oh ! What's the case update ? " asked rajveer instead of rajveer : Oh.....what's the case update ???
There are many like this so i would suggest you too change it.

I didn't like the way you end the chapter with some dots and a picture of knife with blood. I suggest you to simply give a author's note like " Do vote , comment and tell me how was today's update. Hope you have a great day / night ahead " or maybe a banner with vote , comment and thank you.

I suggest you to work upon a little more on the plot and characters.

Overall analysis:

Overall the book is okay but can be much better. I suggest you to see the progress of all the characters. I would love to read the upcoming chapters with a much edited version.