For a moment time stood still as she looked up at him. Her brown eyes were stormy with anguish at his taunting words . Her pink lips trembled before she bit down on her bottom one. Tears swam in her eyes and he reached for her, but she swatted his hand away.
“Don’t touch me," she shook her head.
  Without another word, she turned and ran out of the library's into the foyer and up the stairs. He flinched when the door slammed behind her . He closed his eyes and fought the yearning to go to her.

He stood there for some time before moving away from the door and walked back inside the library straight to the decanter of Brandy. Not bothering to pour it in a glass, he decided the full decanter would do away with his miserable existence.
He hoped.

She raced to her room and flung herself on the bed, willing herself to calm her racing heart, but instead she lay staring at the ceiling, trying desperately not to cry.

She wanted him. Even now, when she should hate him.
Every time she closed her eyes she saw his face, remembered his touch, the feel of him close to her.

When he appeared before her in the library that was proof that despite her attempts to not be affected by his presence , her body responded to him against her will. Her willpower was useless around him. It would have been easier to give in to him.

God she loved him and hated him all the same. The memory of seeing him with Alicia after the wicked thing they did that night crushed her.
She closed her eyes, wondering how she could possibly forgive him for that.
She couldn't.
She tightly closed her eyes and felt a warm tear escape. The pain in her heart found its way back and the dull ache consumed her.
She needed to get away from here, more now than ever... now that Raynaud found her, she wouldn't be safe. She had no one to confide in and no where to go. Either way Adrian would never let her go and she couldn't get him involved. That much was clear. But what was she to do?
She was bound to him by law?
Until she married.
Or....
Eloped....
The thought made her heart race faster. The only way to leave...to escape... Was to Elope.
But could she do it?
Her mind wondered and her thoughts swirled. She had to plan all of this carefully.
But with who? Her mind rolled through with all of the potential candidates for her crazy plan.
Jonathan Brascombe
She swallowed hard. To elope with him would be cause for her ruin. It was a one step attempt and no returning after that. She would leave and never look back even if that meant never seeing Adrian again.
She gasped.
Never see him again...
She threw the words so many times in his face to hurt him. But deep down in her heart she never meant it. But then again why pine over something that she could never have or someone she could only love from afar?.
She slowly raised a finger to her temple that now ached. She was overwhelmed with so much.
But her decision was final.
She would elope.
She would try to convince Jonathan to elope.
She would leave this home and Adrian forever. The pain in her chest squeezed tightly that she let out a breathless sob.
She wasn't strong enough for this but she had to do this.
With that life changing thought  on her mind, she turned her face into her pillow and cried until exhaustion and sleep claimed her.

~•~•~•~•~•~•

Morning came soon enough and he reluctantly met the intrusive sun light with a splitting headache, a pounding arousal in his loins and a moan. He opened his eyes and cursed tossing his forearms over his eyes. Emphasizing the pounding in his head.

He knew his splitting headache  would dissipate by midday but he had no way of taking care of his other affliction that throbbed in agony to be satisfied.

By her.

Adrian cursed and sat up annoyed as he pressed his back against his pillows. With a deep breath he leaned his aching head back and closed his eyes remembering his dream.

It was like no other. He didn't want to awaken from it.
They made sweet passionate love that rivaled any other he had while awake. The erotic images shook him to the core.
Desire and need started to stir deep within him and he snapped open his eyes.
He wanted Evangeline with a desperation that both intrigued and terrified him.
How long was he going to keep this up.
Dear God! He was beyond redemption.

~•~•~•~•~•~•
When Evangeline awoke at last it was to find the bright rays from the sun streaming in through the many-paned windows that gave her an excellent view of the countryside from her bed.

Sunbeams trailed across the wide-planked floor and bounced across the room to her bed . Watching the sun play around her feet, she stared at it, stretching lazily, her arms extending above her head. She yawned. She felt exhausted —not ready to meet the world.  For a while she lay back against her pillows ,her eyes took in the green and cream bedroom which suddenly seemed incredibly large to her. Then, with a surge of awarness of what she must do, she sat up and scooted out of bed and pattered across to the window. She sat on the pillows aligning the window seat and thought of her final irrevocable decision and she felt wretched about it.

By the time she had dressed and slowly walked down the stairs to the dinning room the sweet aroma of breakfast passed her nose.
She passed Penniford with a sweet smile she greeted him.
Slowly she made her way in and stopped in her tracks. The view of Adrian already sitting on the opposite end of the polished table with a paper and further down closer to her Caroline that greeted her with so much joy in her eyes.
Pale and distant, she slid into her chair at the breakfast table. She smiled at Caroline and gave a curt nod to Adrian who in turn look over with warm gaze that made heat radiate to her cheeks.
To liven up the mood Caroline spoke first and she replied. To sit across from him at breakfast was pure torture. His stare seemed to burn into her, daring her to meet it. She swallowed her food as best she could as she listened to Caroline and averted her gaze from Adrian.

They continued their light conversation and made plans for the day. As breakfast was nearing to an end Penniford entered and announced that Baron Hayes and Tonk had arrived.
Adrian smiled and nodded for Penniford to show them in. He sat back and his heart strummed heavily in his chest as he watched Evangeline's eyes brighten as she bounded from her chair and quickly left to greet them.

He knew it would lift her spirits to see her friend. He stood as well and followed Caroline out into the foyer just in time to see Tonk hugged Evangeline. It was as if two siblings had not seen each other in quite some time. She sweetly greeted Baron Hayes before being unceremoniously dragged off by Tonk outside.

With a chuckle he inched closer to Brendan and they watched the two disappear through the front door.
Brendan turned immediately to greet Caroline and the three continued to talk until she excused herself to go prepare a mid morning brunch for their arrival.
“How was the drive, Brendan?” Adrian asked. “Fine,” Brendan replied and gave Adrian a good, manly hug. “Come, have a drink. You must be tired after the long travel.

They retired to his study and sat down and spoke for a while. They spoke of parliament and politics about the upcoming socials.
"Which reminds me my good man, I hear Evangeline is quite the rave," Brendan smiled turning to look at Adrian.
"Indeed she is," Adrian said unconvincingly.
Brendan eyed Adrian.
He watched as his eyes slowly lowered to stare down into his glass.
"You don't seem too happy,"  Brendan pointed out.
Adrian frowned and focused on his cup before taking a sip.
Worried with the sudden quietness that followed, Brendan looked at him.

"Is everything OK Adrian?"
To his dismay Adrian scoffed with a smile that never touched his eyes.
"Describe OK Brendan," he shook his head.
Concerned Brendan leaned forward resting his elbows on his knees.
"Talk to me, what is wrong?"

Adrian looked so weary at this moment. So much was on his chest he did not know what to do.
He could not open up to anyone about his unsavoury desire for Evangeline or the simple fact that she feels for him the same way.
It would ruin them both.

Before Adrian could say another word Tonk and Evangeline entered. The sweet laughter of her voice stopped him as he stood riveted in place and watched them enter.

His eyes followed her as they ran to the opposite side of the study and they sat down to talk continued to giggle and whisper.

There was a look in Adrian's eyes that Brendan noticed as he followed his gaze to Evangeline.
It was carnal, predatory like and possessive.
The two were completely oblivious  that Brendan noticed their brief stare at one another and that it was intimate. There was something there dormant and fighting its way out to the surface then she averted her gaze.

He caught that glimpse in her eyes and it was evident that between Adrian and Evangeline there was no longer the bond of ward and guardian but something more. Longing, torture, desire.

He understood now why Adrian was distant and slightly withdrawn. He was battling with the inevitable. His feelings for Eva.

He could never comment on the exchange he witnessed between Evangeline and Adrian. It wasn't his place to do so.

Brendan looked away not wanting to give into observation. He too loved at one time and loved very deeply. 

Adrian for the brief moment that he looked into those eyes he was jolted. The angelic glitter in her eyes from long ago had returned. She smiled so sweetly with Tonk and sat beside him to talk like they never been apart.

When she lifted her gaze and met his that fleeting moment told him so much although she would deny it later he would not be fooled.

He craved her fiercely,  not only for her body; he missed the sweetness of her smile, the sound of her laughter which had come so easily at times , the sparkle in those brown eyes when she was amused or had mischievous thoughts. 
He missed the adoring way she had of looking at him, as if he was the only person on this earth. He missed her conversations, her company, the very scent of her when he hugged her.  To heal the breach between them has proven to be torturous and the hardest thing to do.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•

They enjoyed themselves well into the evening and Penniford announced that supper was finally ready.
They were minutes into their evening meal when Alicia made her unexpected appearance. She greeted everyone. And Evangeline immediately lost her appetite. Alicia had been away visiting a sick relation in Sussex. She had finally gotten use to her absence.

"Oh Adrian my love how I have missed you," she crooned quickly stealing a kiss from his lips. One he evidently did not return.

Right away she sat at his side and picked up a conversation with Brendan who in change quickly dove in for the rescue the moment he saw Eva pale and Adrian's jaw tick.

Dinner indeed was torturous for Adrian as he noticed Eva had emotionally already withdrew herself. Guilt ate at his heart and he wanted nothing more than to push his chair back, stand and close the distance between them to take her into his arm and caress her.

Throughout the remainder of their supper Adrian had been silent and grim-faced, replying only when spoken to, and always briefly. He was downing glass after glass of wine to numb the urge to not rudely toss Alicia out. He toyed with his food  as did Evangeline. Alicia seemed to find nothing odd in their behavior or just chose to menacingly look it over. Tonk spoke cheeringly with Eva noticing her distress. She brushed it off flawlessly and continued her supper with Caroline, Tonk and Brendan as her support.

By the time she managed to get up to her room, she was exhausted from the effort of pretending everything was fine. She had said her good byes to Tonk and Brendan when they left for the night as they had secured a room at the nearest inn they made plans to return the next morning. She curtly bid Alicia and Adrian a good night as well and left them alone. Rosie helped her undress and got her ready for bed then bid her good night with a loving kiss on her forehead. She lay awake, staring blindly up into the darkness. Her eyelids ached and burned, and her throat felt raw with the tears that now fell freely.

The house had finally calmed to a silence and wearily his body trailed the foyer. He had finally convinced Alicia that it wasn't a good idea to spend the night. She fleetingly showed her disgruntled response then immediately changed her mood giving him a false smile. When she left she agreed that she too would return in the morning. He slowly trudged up the stairs and walked towards his room.
He had made it several steps passed Evangeline's door when he heard the muffled sounds of cries. Her cries.

They pulled him closer tugging at his heart. He stood their hesitating. He knew fully well if he went beyond this barrier there was no turning back. The need to comfort her was beyond his calm collective restraint and he simply could not ignore her.  Resting his forehead on the door, he closed his eyes and listened to her sniffle and sob. Not able to hold back any longer, His hand shakily lifted to the door knob, he slowly turned it and went in.
By the time she realized between her heart wrenching sobs, the click of the door it was too late. Adrian was by her side pulling her into his arms. He gently caressed her and pulled her close flush against him. She did not protest because she wanted this, needed this more than anything. And when his head lowered and blindly but lovingly placed kisses on her where ever they fell, she gladly accepted them from her forehead, her nose, her cheek, to her lips.  It was there she needed his lips the most and she trembled when his kiss deepened. They were tense in their embrace and as the kiss deepened they relaxed. He kept it soft and sensual not wanting her to push him away. His hands rubbed her gently and he broke away from the kiss murmuring words of comfort and apologies. She silently listened to his voice in the dark as it calmed her and warmed her. She snuggled deeper into his arms not wanting to loose this moment with him.
Even if it was just for tonight.
Deep down in her mind it was more clear than ever that she had to leave.
Evangeline didn’t want to let thoughts of what she must do  intrude on her time with him, so she quickly banished the ideas and sleepily drifted off to the sound of Adrian’s voice and his heart beating steadily beneath her finger's.

~•~•~•~•~•~•

A week had passed since that night and for what it seemed to Adrian something changed between them. For the most part she no longer looked at him with hurt or contempt in her eyes but with something different and he did not know what it was.
That morning he woke up before the rest of the house to avoid Rosie finding them together. Reluctantly he left her side. He laid awake at her side most of that morning as her room slowly lightened from the dark sky turning into dawn. She was so peaceful and beautiful. When she finally awoke he was long gone. But when their eyes met over breakfast there was something there and as quickly as he saw it was gone as she looked away.

Now he sat here at the Wickhams Soirée unsettled and uneasy. He watched her closely as she danced with numerous partners. She was the bell of the ball as some murmured and indeed she was.

All eyes were on the petite beauty in the green sequined gown that sparkled beneath the chandeliers light. Caroline left nothing to chance with her hairstyle as lush ringlets hung down her back and her shoulder. 

When he finally stood and walked over to her and silently held out his hand, she took it and followed him out to the dance floor.  When she looked up at him, her eyes appeared darker as he stared at them, making him want desperately to know what she was thinking.

"Are you enjoying yourself peach?" He asked.
The smile she gave him was so humble it made him a little concerned.
"Yes," she nodded.
They fell silent for a while and he noticed her gaze looked everywhere but at him.
He gently squeezed her hand and watched as her distant stare fell to his lapel.
"Eva, Is something wrong?" he looked down at her.
She forced the guilty feelings away and put on her bravest smile. If he only knew she was barely holding onto her nerves.
"No nothing is wrong," she sweetly looked up to him.

His eyes narrowed then he cocked his head to the side and held her gaze.
"If something is amiss, little one. You know you can tell me right?" his tone deepened and it sent a shiver down her spine.
If you only knew there is so much I want to tell you.

But she couldn't.

His eyes searched hers as though he could see straight into her soul. When he looked down to her, she saw uncertainty in his eyes.
“Are you sure your ok?” She nodded, afraid to say something for fear she’d cry.
For too long she had spent little time with him. Now, being in his company, she didn’t want the moment to end. Not like this. But she had no choice.
By the time he was about to say something else, Jonathan Brascombe suddenly appeared at their side.

The silent exchange between the two men was tense but to avoid scandal Adrian nodded and bent to kiss Eva's hand. With a tight squeeze he smiled.
"Enjoy your night, I am going to sit with the men in the gaming room."
With that he turned to walk away and left her.

They danced and laughed as always. She liked Jonathan. He was handsome,witty,kind and a gentleman.
But he wasn't Adrian...
He continued to talk with her and she answered back. To those that stood by and watched them both could swear by the month end an engagement between the two was in order.

“Let us get some refreshments,”  Jonathan whispered into her ear when the dance came to an end.

She nodded and followed him towards the crowded area near the refreshment table.

They stood there for a while and enjoyed the passerby's that danced. She spotted Alicia and the feeling of dread coursed through her veins. When she gathered up the courage she asked that he take her outside for some fresh air.
With a boyish grin he obliged and let her lead the way.
She felt  Alicia’s eyes on her as she left the room on Jonathan’s arm, and there was no doubt that Alicia felt joy that Adrian wasn't around to watch her leave with him.

Evangeline made her way across the long dance room out through the double doors, towards the garden. There she stood, gasping in the cool night air under a tree. Jonathan joined her.
“And how are you enjoying the soiree?” Jonathan asked as he stood beside her.
“Very well. And you?” Evangeline smiled up at him.

"The same," he said pleasantly.

From where she stood, she could hear the hum of voices and music floating towards her. Not wanting anyone to hear their conversation,  slowly, she led  him away  and started walking farther away from them all.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Jonathan was dumbstruck.
After more than five weeks of Jonathan's acquaintance it was a bold move and suggestion but she won't back down.
He swallowed hard in disbelief at her request.
Elope!!!
He shook his head.
"You would be ruined, why not a formal wedding?"
"The Earl would never consent to it," she protested shaking her head.

Pouting and inching closer to him she looked up at him.
“Don’t you want to marry me, Jonathan? This is the only way," she raised her hands to his.

"Yes I do, but surely if we spoke to Lord Fairhaven,  he would understand,"

She felt impatient at this point and began to pace. He narrowed his eyes and gently stopped her and caught her arm. He turned her to face him.
"Is there something you're not telling me Evangeline? This sudden request is quite odd,"

Skeptically she looked at him contemplating what to tell him.
The truth?
A lie?
She sighed.
She looked up at him. Then decided to tell him with hopes he would do it.

She stood still and looked down at her fingers that twirled nervously.
He gently tilted up her chin and looked at her with concerned eyes.

"A couple of years ago...." She began.
He patiently listened.
"Before I came to live with St. James, I was the daughter of Sir Oliver Chenoweth, a wealthy merchant from Dower. My father had a vicious gambling vice that consumed him. Slowly it got out of hand and he started loosing the families fortune. By the time I was thirteen my father was so far gone that he never returned home. My mother became deathly ill and on the night that she found out my father left us penniless, he offered me up to settle any unpaid debt to Raynaud Locksley," her lips trembled and tears began to fill her eyes.

" He sent his men to capture me the night my mother died. I have no clue if she was buried or what?" Her voice cracked into a sob.
He inched closer but she shook her head wanting to continue.
" They brought me to him and I escaped and ended up in the streets where I was taken in by two orphans Tonk and Phoebe, and two pick pockets Travis and Jobbins," she sniffed with a soft laugh remembering them.
"Out of desperation and trying to aid my dying friend I snuck into St. James's house to steal for money for medicine to cure Phoebe, but I got caught. Instead of turning me over to the constables, he took me in and took care of me."
"I have been safe, Jonathan for 3 years and he found me. The day of my birthday he showed up," she sobbed.

"Dear God, you must let St. James know," he breathed.

Shaking her head she panicked.
"No. No. I can't. Reynaud is dangerous. He threatened to harm everyone I hold dear to me and I don't think I can bare it if anything happened to them."

To Adrian.

"This is why I must leave. Go far away," her tears fell freely as she sobbed.

Heart broken and saddened by this he pulled her close into his arms rubbing her back to calm her.

She pulled away and looked up to him beseechingly with worry in her eyes.
"Please we have to do this. After we are gone and far if you don't want to be with me we can part ways. But please Jonathan I can't risk being here any more."

He caressed her cheek and looked into her upturned face and her eyes. Agony and torment began to brew in them.

"Are you sure you want to go through with this?" he asked, his voice dropping to a whisper, looking at her worriedly.

She nodded her head vigorously with no hesitation.
"Yes,"

Not left with any option he gave in and nodded his head. With relief and more sobs she fell into his embrace again. They stood there for a while.

From afar, within the thick bushes, a shadowy figure watched them.
Turning away Alicia wickedly smiled and left them in their private moment. Reynaud Locksley has just solved all of her problems.