The air between us shifts as he follows me upstairs. It's like being in my place surrounded by my things will make things different; more personal. I know I've been to his place, met his parents and friends before... And it's honestly more than I've ever really had with any other guy. But something changed between us recently and I can't wrap my mind around it. I just know that having him in my place makes things more intimate; more intense.

"Nice place," he says once we step inside.

"Thanks." I can't help but bite my nails as he takes it all in, his eyes moving around curiously. "Would you like something to drink?" I ask.

"A glass of water, please." His eyes find mine and I realize this is kind of awkward for him too.

"Sure." I go to the kitchen and take a deep breath as I open the fridge and get a bottle of water for him.

"Thanks... Are you okay? Is it a bad time?" Thomas searches my eyes.

"Yeah. No. I... I guess I'm just surprised to see you... When did you arrive?"

"About a couple of hours ago. I thought I'd pay my sister a visit, then stop by to see you... But I ended up coming straight here and... Uh... now we're all awkwardly standing in front of each other and..." He chuckles, pink coloring his cheeks.

I don't know why, but seeing him blush makes me smile. "Can we start over?"

"How about we go out for a while? I could eat something..." He bites his lower lip, and it strangely puts me at ease. I'm not the only one nervous here.

"Sure. Uh, I was just... kind of in the middle of a bath when you arrived. Could you give me five minutes to get ready?" I feel myself blushing the moment he raises his eyebrows, a slow smirk forming on his lips.

"Uh... Yeah." His eyes shine, and the smile on his lips lets me know he's still just Thomas. 

"Shut up!" I walk by him to head to the bathroom. "Make yourself comfortable."

I quickly drain the water from the tub and hop in the shower. My hair is a mess, so I need to wash it if I want to look half decent. I haven't shaved all week and I curse when I see the state of my legs and armpits.

"Damn it!" I run the razor roughly over my legs.

When I'm done in the bathroom, I rush to the bedroom and sigh when I look at my clothes.

"God, I seriously need to go shopping." I get a pair of jeans and throw a plain black tank top in and a pair of flats.

I don't dare to look at myself in the mirror since I won't have time to deal with the dark circles that have been following me all week. By the time I'm ready, I need to take a couple of deep breaths to calm my nerves.

It's just Thomas, Lisa! Why the hell are you so nervous?

When I feel less like a ball of stress, I walk into the living room and stop dead in my tracks at the sight in front of me. Thomas is sitting on the couch with his arms crossed over his chest, his legs spread apart and his head resting on the back of the couch.

He looks fast asleep and my heart squeezes painfully tight in my chest. He looks so handsome and so out of place in my girly living room. My eyes go to his muscular body to his chiseled face and the need to touch him is stronger than me.

I sit down by his side, my body turned to him and my hand already touching his face. He has a day worth of stubble and I run my fingers lightly over it, my eyes having a hard time ignoring his mouth.

God, I look like a creep! I pull my hand away and he opens his eyes slowly, looking directly into mine. It's then I really realize how close we are. Yet, we don't make a move to put some distance between us.

"Hey," I bite my lips, my eyes searching his. "You fell asleep."

"You took forever to shower..." he whispers, his eyes falling to my lips.

"You look tired." I press my hands to the fine lines around his eyes, and he holds his breath as I caress his cheek. What am I doing? I'm so playing with fire here.

"I needed to see you." He holds my hand, kissing the back of it, and I close my eyes at the intensity of his words.

"I missed you too." I open my eyes and he's studying me intensely.

"You went on a date," he whispers, and I look down.

"Thomas..." I sigh. I don't owe him anything, but the hurt in his eyes is hard to swallow. "I was not trying to make you jealous.

"I know." He leans closer, our breaths mingling. "And that's the fucked up part. You're just living your life. But... Fuck! I can't stand the thought of you with another guy."

"I was not trying to play games with you." I look from his eyes to his mouth, then back to his eyes. My lower belly clenching, butterflies having a party in my stomach.

"What were you trying to do, then?" He leans closer, his eyes dark and hot.

"I wanted to feel special. To feel like I'm more than just a willing body." I force the words out, my heart beating so fast, that I need to take a deep breath.

"And did he make you feel like that? He holds my nape, putting enough pressure that I have no option but to look into his eyes. "Did he make you feel special?"

"Yes." I raise my chin, my eyes locking with his.

"You said you're not going out with him again." He rubs his nose to mine, but I see the way his jaw ticks as if he's holding himself back.

"No. I'm not going out with him again."

"And why is that?" He pulls back a little to look at me.

"He's not the one I want to make me feel like that." I breathe the words as his eyes go even darker with lust.

"Lisa?" he whispers.

"Yeah?" 

He touches his lips to mine ever so gently as if giving me a chance to pull away, to say no. "Tell me you want this as much as I do." He rubs his nose to mine.

"Yes." I close the distance between us, sealing our lips together.

I hear him moaning and it ignites a kind of desire inside me I've never felt before. I open my mouth and he devours my lips with so much passion; I have to hold on to his shoulders to feel anchored.

One of his hands grips my nape while the other holds my waist, pulling me to him so I'm straddling his legs. No space between us. He's all I can think about, his touch making me forget every other kiss I've ever had.

"Fuck!" He kisses my neck, my collarbone, and then my lips again as if he can't hold himself. As if it's all too much for him too. "You're so perfect." He murmurs before kissing me again. "I want you so much! So fucking much, Lisa." He bites my lower lip.

"Yeah..." I touch my hands to his abs, lifting his shirt.

"No." He holds both of my hands to stop me. "Shit! Not like this!"

"What?" I search his eyes. "You said... I thought..."

"Lisa." He uses both hands to hold my face and pulls me into a soft kiss. "I don't want you to feel used... I... I'm traveling again in a couple of weeks..."

"Oh?" I feel like a bucket of cold water has been thrown at me.

"But you're right. I'm tired of ignoring this thing between us. Tired of playing hot and cold." He searches my eyes. "I mean, I know we said we shouldn't, but I can't get you out of my mind, Lisa. I can't. I want you. For real. I want a relationship with you."

"I... I want you too." I whisper, afraid to have my heart broken. "I'm just..."

"What?" He touches my chin, so I'm looking at him.

"I've never... you know... been in a relationship. I don't know how it works."

"I don't know how to do this either, but can we take one day at a time?" He gives me a full smile, making me chuckle.

"So we're really doing this?" I bite my lips and he grins.

"We're doing this." He pulls me into another kiss.

He kisses me slowly this time, savoring my lips and making me so hot, that I think I might explode. "I've wanted you for so long..." He kisses my neck, making me moan.

"Told you men and women can't be friends. They'll end up sleeping together at some point." I touch my hands to his abs and smile when I feel them flexing.

He bites my jaw, before biting my lower lip. "I'll show you it's more than just that."

"Is that so?" 

"Yeah!" He moves so fast that in one moment I'm on top of him and in the other, I'm sitting on the sofa while he stands in front of me.

"Come on, let's go." He offers me his hand.

"Uh, go where?" I frown but take his hand anyway.

"I'm not screwing this up. I want you so bad right now, but I need to do it right. This is our first day together for good. Let me show you I want more than just your body." He pulls me to him, his hand circling my waist.

"Wining and dining... Good plan!" I joke, but I'm secretly happy he wants to take things slowly.

"Well, yeah. That, and I have another dinner night I want you to erase from your memory." He pulls me to the door.

"I can't believe you're jealous." I shake my head, and he stops, pulling me to him.

"I thought I was having a heart attack when I got your message." He holds my face, his eyes searching mine. "There I was in another fucking country, afraid to make a move, and a guy just simply asks you on a date and you say yes?"

"We were not together, Thomas."

"I know. And I'm not saying you owed me anything. I'm just saying I was jealous. And that I hate his guts." He kisses me softly, making me chuckle.

"You don't even know him..." I tease.

"Yeah, thank God for small favors." He pulls me into a hug.

"Come on, let's get you some food." I wrap my arms around his waist as we walk downstairs.

_____

A/N: Are butterflies having a party in your stomach too? :D

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XOXO

- Celeste