I keep looking at my phone, my mind racing as those three dots keep appearing and disappearing on the screen. I wonder if he thinks I'm playing some kind of game with him. My mind was obviously on him the whole time I was out, but where was his?

Thomas: Are you home yet? Can I call you?

Lisa: Sure.

My phone starts ringing immediately, and I have to take a deep breath before answering it. "Hi," I whisper, feeling awkward with him for the first time since we met.

"Lisa." He lets out a relieved breath.

I wish my heart would stop beating so fast, and that it didn't get so excited every time we talk. Hearing his voice today feels amazing and so hard at the same time. It's like my heart is exposed and my feelings for him are finally forced to be acknowledged.

"Hey." I swallow, glad he can't see me.

"So, a date, huh?" he says, trying to sound nonchalant. Only I know him better by now.

"Yeah." I close my eyes, wondering where this conversation is going. There's no way we could ever work. He made it clear more than once. Yet, he's definitely jealous right now.

"Did you have a good time? Have you known him for a while?" he asks.

"Yeah, It's Mark. He's Alexia's husband's best friend. I've known him for a while now." I head to the couch, realizing I was frozen at the door.

"So... Uh... Are you seeing him again?"

"Yeah..." I rest my head on the back of the couch. "He's a nice guy, but..."

"But?" he whispers, the eagerness in his voice unable to ignore.

"Guess there was no chemistry there." I close my eyes, remembering Mark's kiss. When he made a move to kiss me, I thought about turning my head away, almost as if by instinct. But the way he looked at me like he cared if I agreed or not to the kiss made me realize he was waiting for my consent. Something I didn't know I craved until that moment. So, when his lips touched mine, a part of me wished I could feel something. Too bad, my heart was miles away. Still is.

"Oh..." Thomas murmurs, breaking me away from my thoughts. "Lisa, I..." He gives a sharp exhale, the longing in his tone clear.

"How have you been?" I clear my throat when my eyes water. "I was worried."

"I spent the last thirty hours nursing a rhino that was attacked by poachers back to life. She has monopolized all my time lately." He lets out a frustrated breath. "I forgot my phone at the hotel when I left Johannesburg and didn't know your number by heart."

"Who memorizes people's phone numbers these days, right?" I try to joke, but when he doesn't laugh, I know something has shifted in our friendship.

"Yeah..." he says after a second.

"Is the rhino going to be fine?"

"I have no fucking clue." He lets out a sigh, and it's the first time I've seen him so serious. "Rhino poaching is out of control. They've already killed three animals and got two severely injured. We'll need a bigger backup, but I'm not sure we'll get any more people so soon. Things are difficult here, but we're all doing our best. I just..."

"Just?" I whisper, my eyes closing when he sucks in a sharp inhalation

"I hate I'm here right now."

"Thomas..."

"This job is amazing. Being able to help with some this big..." His breath snags. "But I miss you, Lisa! And I have no right to feel jealous you went on a date. But I am jealous. I am-"

"Thomas." I open my eyes, blinking fast so I don't cry. "I don't deserve this hot and cold we've been playing. We don't deserve it."

"Lisa..."

"I know I said we should be friends, but this is clearly not working."

"You're right." He clears his throat. "I shouldn't have said anything. I..."

"Maybe we should take a little break from... from us," I say and he makes out a low, pained noise.

"Yeah..." He takes a deep breath. "Maybe you're right."

"I'll see you around, Thomas," I say, biting my lips so I don't lose it.

"I... Yeah... Take care, Lisa."

*****

Talking to Thomas last night has put me in a ridiculously bad mood. My head and heart are at war but both are losing the game right now. I miss him like crazy and deep down I know if our circumstances were different, we could have something good together.

It's like I'm finally ready to dive into a relationship, but the guy I want is not boyfriend material as he put it himself.

"Look at her, do you think she is thinking about Thomas or Mark?" Daniel murmurs to Chloe as they both enter the kitchen of Sweet Spot.

"Absolutely Thomas!" She replies.

"But she went on a date with Mark..."

"The fact you guys think you're being funny is hilarious!" I give them a pointed look and go back to my notes. We have a huge order coming up, and we're all trying to come up with a plan to do it in time without messing with our regular orders.

Too bad my two assistants think my personal life is more interesting.

"Come on, Lisa. You're getting more action than Daniel and me together." Chloe chuckles. "And we're in college, supposedly living our wild years." 

"Right," I say. "If the number of girls looking for Daniel here shows anything, I'd say his love life is way more interesting than mine." I look at him and he has the decency to blush.

"Now, you have a point, boss." Chloe laughs, making Daniel roll his eyes.

"Okay, seriously, guys." I put the papers in front of me away. "I need your help here. This is the biggest order we've ever had."

"I still think you should hire another assistant," Chloe says. "Someone to help you in the kitchen. This is big, Lisa. Like if they're impressed with your work, they'll sure hire us again and recommend us to other people."

"God, I don't know." I sigh. "I'd have to take some time to train them and stuff, and we're already working on a tight schedule here."

"So, hire someone to help me and take Chloe to work with you," Daniel suggests, making me pause. "She has helped you before and she was the one in charge when you spent that weekend away with Thomas."

"Well, this could work." I meet Chloe's eyes. "Do you think you could do it? You said once you wanted to try out that baking beginner's course. We could work on your schedule so you can do it and still have enough time for you to help me in the kitchen."

"Really?" she asks, the sparkle in her eyes making me smile. "I'd love to. I mean, if you believe I can do it."

"Hell yeah, I totally believe you can do it. Daniel is right. You worked by yourself for a weekend. If you start a course and focus only on the baking part of things, there's no way we'll fail."

"Damn, I'm excited now!" She squeals.

"Okay, now we need to find someone to work with Daniel," I say.

"I'm on it." He starts messing with his phone. "There is always someone looking for a part-time gig on Campus."

"Great. Let's do it then!" I say, my mood improving dramatically.

*****

The next couple of weeks pass in a blur of hard work and bigger orders. I feel like we have never worked as hard as we have lately, but at the same time, it's never been more gratifying. Leah, one of Daniel's classmates, is now working with us too, and we all make a pretty good team. Chloe is working harder than I've ever seen and together we're getting things done twice as fast.

I haven't talked to Thomas apart from a social media comment here and there. Seeing him doing something so beautiful to the world is really awe-inspiring, but a selfish part of me wishes he would do it here near me. He comments on every daily picture and video I post on the bakery account, and weirdly I believe it's his own way to keep connected to me.

I wish I could say that my feelings for him have gone away; that I've moved to the life I've had before him. But the truth is that I miss him even more.

Today, for the first time in what feels like ever, I have a night to myself. No bills to pay. No suppliers to deal with. No bullshit. Just me, a glass of wine, and a hot bubble bath. They say life is all about guilty pleasures and these are mine.

The moment I get in the tub, I sigh in relief and contentment. "Damn, this is good!" I close my eyes, enjoying the comfort of the hot water against my skin.

Ding Dong Ding Dong Ding Dong Ding Dong

"Noooooo," I cry out.

Ding Dong Ding Dong Ding Dong Ding Dong

"Damn it!" I get out of the bathtub, toweling myself quickly before throwing a maxi dress on so I can get to the door.

"Hey, we're..." I start but stop dead in my tracks when I see who this is.

"Surprise!" Thomas laughs at my astonished face.

"Oh my God!" I throw myself at him. I don't think twice. I just react.

"Please don't throw up on me." He braces for the impact of my body, hugging me tightly.

"You're such a jerk!" I slap his biceps, pulling away a little so I can look at him.

"Now that's the homecoming I was waiting for." He chuckles.

"I can't believe you're here." I search his gaze and what I see reflected there makes my eyes sting with tears. He's looking at me like he can't believe I'm real; like he can't get enough. He's looking at me like he's missed me as much as I've him. And damn, that's intoxicating. 

"We were able to finish it early and..." He swallows, one of his hands sliding up my back and resting possessively on my nape.

"And?" I whisper, lost in his deep blue eyes.

"I missed home."

"Oh."

"Will you invite me in or...?" He smiles, that trace of mischief in his eyes making me blush.

"Sure! Yeah! Of course! Come on in!"

_____

A/N: Heck yes! Look who's back! Did you miss him? :D

Thanks for reading! Please don't forget to vote and follow me here @CelesteABrook for news and updates! <3

XOXO

Celeste