Chapter 19: Snack Carrots
Balancing two trays filled with burgers and fries, Robin made his way through the narrow aisles at Rose's diner, while Tyler followed close behind--chewing on a pair of immediately snatched french fries.
"Hi, Robin." Des smiled cheerily at the sight of her friend and busted out an even bigger smile when she realized Robin wasn't alone. "And, hi Ty!"
Tyler waved with one of his crutches as his mouth was still stuffed with french fries. "Hello," Robin mumbled as he focused on not dropping the precariously balanced trays. Carrying two trays simultaneously had not been a wise choice.
Textbooks, notepads, and post-it notes in an array of colors filled Des' table. Helpfully, she moved things aside so that Robin could put down his load of burgers and fries.
"Why are you studying here?" Robin asked as he slid the trays down on the table--relieved he hadn't dropped anything and embarrassed himself in front of the whole diner.
"Pax kept trying to eat my textbooks," Des replied and pointed at a chewed-up page. "I needed to get some bunny-free time to focus." She took a bite of her jackfruit burger--the diner had a surprisingly well-rounded vegetarian menu. "And I was hungry," she added.
"But the carrots are for him I assume?" Robin pointed at the carrot sticks Des had chosen as a side dish.
"Have to feed him something else than textbooks," Des replied. "I'll put them in my pocket when I leave." She patted the belly pocket on her neon green shorts overalls, which were coupled with a striped belly shirt underneath.
"Hold these, Robby." Tyler had made his way to the table and handed Robin his crutches so he could squeeze into the booth. Starting to become accustomed to crutch logistics, Robin grabbed the handles and let Tyler use his shoulder as support when sitting down.
"Oh, carrot sticks!" Tyler scooted down the couch and immediately grabbed a handful of orange vegetables.
"Those are for Pax," Robin protested meekly, knowing nothing could stand in the way of Tyler's appetite.
"Pax can share his carrots," Des insisted. "I do feed him other stuff too, you know. So go ahead, Tyler."
Tyler immediately helped himself to another handful of carrots--apparently, his unquenchable appetite didn't just extend to sweets--while Robin took place next to him on the couch and arranged their trays, moving Tyler's double bacon cheeseburger over to the other boy, while he kept the avocado chicken burger for himself. Although Robin suspected Tyler would eat some of it as well. He had, after all, mumbled something about the ginormous burger in front of him being too small.
"Ty, what do you want to drink? I'm going to get a soda for myself and I can grab one for you too. Coke?" Robin realized neither of them had a drink and got up from the couch, just as he had sat down.
"Fanta, please," Ty replied, mouth full of french fries. If Robin wanted to partake in any of the salty fried snacks, he would have to hurry back. Tyler fired off an adorable smile that made Robin want to grab Tyler and kiss him. But the current setting didn't seem appropriate for such actions, so he reluctantly refrained.
While filling up the soda cups by the fountain, Robin looked toward Des and Tyler in the booth. The sight of them laughing together, wrapped up in friendly conversation, made him elated. With them in his life, he didn't feel alone. With them in his life, he had a family.
As Robin returned, he put down the glass of Fanta in front of Ty, who immediately grabbed it and gulped about half the content. While Ty was busy with his drink, Robin took the opportunity to grab the last remaining fries. It seemed he would have to get used to fending off Tyler for food. But it was a sacrifice Robin gladly made to spend time with the blonde boy. Food seemed unimportant compared to the needs that were met by his delightful company.
He could see Des glance curiously toward him and Tyler, as they sat close together and shared their food. Since Robin knew his friend, and that she could never let things lay unanswered, he just waited for the inevitable barrage of questions.
"So are you guys..." she started, seemingly unsure of how to address the situation.
Robin threw a hesitant glance toward Tyler, not wanting to say something that would seem like too much. Since he had just stuffed his mouth full of burger Tyler didn't give any response.
"We're... together," Robin replied in an uncertain tone. A hand caressed his leg under the table to let him know that the answer was approved.
Des cocked her head to the side. "Does that mean you're dating?" she asked outright.
Having finished chewing his mouthful of burger, Tyler piped up before Robin could answer. "We're dating," he confirmed confidently and cradled Robin's hand with his own among the clutter of books and trays on the table.
Robin looked over, flabbergasted at the immediate answer, and was met with a smile and nod. They hadn't used that word before. Did this mean he had a boyfriend? That was another word yet to be used. So many confusing, overwhelming, and beautiful words to be conquered.
"Yeah, we're... dating," Robin repeated to Des and turned his hand to interlace it with Tyler's.
Des looked like she was about to burst from excitement. If they weren't in public she probably would have jumped around, squealed, and assaulted them both with hugs. Now she settled for putting her hand on top of their interlaced ones. "I'm happy for you guys," she said. It was clear that she meant it.
To further confirm their intimate entanglement Tyler discreetly pressed his lips against Robin's cheek, making sure no one in the diner but Des could see. "We're happy too," he confirmed before resuming his burger-eating quest.
A comfortable and relaxed dinner followed. They discussed school, tv-shows, and bunnies. Tyler ate his burger, at least a quarter of Robin's burger, all the french fries, and the remaining carrot sticks. He might have eaten the left-overs from the table beside them as well.
A nudge on the arm caught Robin's attention. "My aunt and sister are here already," Tyler said and pointed outside toward a Donna getting out of a car together with a small girl with curly dark hair pulled up in pom-poms. "I need to go."
Robin moved out of the way to let Tyler out of the booth. An outstretched hand and assistance with crutches made the maneuver easier.
"See you tomorrow in school," Tyler said, leaning in for a kiss. Robin looked around anxiously. He still couldn't shake the feeling of prying eyes always watching him. But he also couldn't deny Tyler a kiss. So he allowed a quick peck in the cover of the sofa.
Longingly, Robin followed Tyler with his eyes as the other boy made his way out of the restaurant. Then his gaze wandered toward the window to see a little girl almost topple her older brother as he appeared outside.
Robin still couldn't believe that he was actually dating the impossibly perfect boy outside. It shouldn't be possible. Someone that amazing shouldn't even look at him. But yet. Tyler had done so much more than just looking at him. He had done things that made Robin blush just thinking about them.
"Robin!" The beckoning from Des brought Robin out of swooning and back to the restaurant.
"What?" he responded. "Were you saying something?"
She rolled her eyes, but a smile remained on her lips. "I was asking if you've talked to your mother since, well, Tyler, happened?"
He shook his head, looking down at the plaid tablecloth. "I can't tell her," he mumbled. "You know how she is."
Des sighed, taking a slurp from her pineapple milkshake. "You're still you though. And this is the 21st century—being gay is not a big deal anymore. I mean, my cousin Laurence got married to his husband Henry last summer, and not even my grandma batted an eye."
"Maybe it's not a big deal to you and your family. But my mom certainly seems to mind. She wants me to be someone I'm not. I almost told her when I was back home last weekend and that's when she started to go on about how uni is a bad influence on me and that she won't let me attend anymore if I keep having such ideas."
"Well, then Liza doesn't have to know. Because, believe it or not, your mom doesn't find out about everything you do, Robin. I'll help you make sure you and Tyler can be as cute as you like without your mom knowing a thing. At least until we can figure out a way for you to be independent of her."
He nodded and took her hand. It felt nice to have someone on his side. Someone who could fight the dragon with him. Even if they still didn't quite know which weapons would slay her.
"She's been calling me," Robin revealed, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "I turned off my phone, cause I don't know what to say to her. Can you help me come up with something?"
Des nodded and reached her hand across the table to take his. A touch that didn't fizzle or pop, but instead soothed and nursed. "I'll help you, Robin," she said. "I promise."
"I just want to be with him," Robin said, a shy smile adorning his lips. "I need to be with him." At this point, Tyler's presence in his life felt as necessary as food, water, and air.
"I understand," Des said and squeezed his hand. "I can see how much he means to you, and you to him."
With a sigh, he pushed his phone awake. Almost immediately, an angry and insistent signal erupted from it. Robin jumped in his seat from the suddenness of it.
"Pick it up," Des encouraged him. "It'll be worse the longer you avoid her. I will help you with what to say."
With a sigh, Robin lifted the phone and pressed the answer-button. "Hi, mom," he said, trying to not let his current state of mind be audible. "Yeah, I'm sorry I haven't been answering... I-I...uh."
He looked toward Des for help. "Tell her your charger broke," she stage-whispered.
"My charger broke," he repeated. "That's why my phone was off. I bought a new one after class though. So it's fixed now."
Des gave him a thumbs-up for successfully talking his way out of the situation.
"Yeah, I have studied. I'm eating right now. With Des. We're discussing this thing we're doing this weekend."
This was the lie he'd told his mother when he stormed out of her house and he aimed to stick to it because he had no intention of going back to that house. Hopefully, it was enough for his mother to leave him alone.
"Yeah, it's a... thing," he eloquently answered when Liza questioned what he and Des were doing. "Like for school, I guess."
That's when Des snatched the phone from his hand. "Hi, Mrs. Erie," she said, voice dripping sweet of honey. "I'm afraid I have to ask to borrow Robin this weekend. You see there's a fundraiser for the animal rights group I run at college and I need someone to help me set things up tomorrow night. I don't know many people here so I asked Robin." Des appeared to play on the fact that Robin's mom hoped for something romantic to occur between them. "The actual event is on Saturday," Des continued, without giving Liza time to interject. "And I was hoping Robin could be my date for that."
Robin couldn't make out the exact reply from his mother, but it seemed she and Des had started to plan what they both should wear to this imaginary event. Which meant he was probably off the hook. For the time being.
"There," Des said as she hung up the phone. "I got you off the hook... for this weekend." She threw him a poignant look. "But you know you're gonna have to deal with her eventually, right? Soon Liza will wonder what you're up to if you never come home. You can't avoid her forever."
Robin sighed and picked up a remaining french fry from Ty's plate--who must have missed it somehow. "I know..." he mumbled. "But how? I can't tell her. And I can't go there. I just can't."
"You should talk to someone about her," Des suggested.
"I'm talking to you..." Robin mumbled.
"I mean like a therapist or counselor, Robin. The things she did to you that's not something you should have to carry by yourself. And they might be able to help you with what to do. Miss Horn from the LGBTQ group seems nice for example."
He shook his head decisively. "I don't need that," he ensured her, wanting the conversation to move away from his mother. He didn't want to think of her and he didn't want to talk about her. All he wanted to do was to go back home and lay on sheets that smelt of lemon drops, lollipops, and naughtiness. "I can handle her on my own. I don't want anyone else involved in this."
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