Caroline

Lana has been doing better than expected. She came out on stage and did a few songs with the guys, and it was perfect. I waited in Cody's dressing room, and as soon as he walked in, I jumped into his arms.

"You were right, I'll contact the label." He said, and I slammed my lips on his. I'm so happy for Lana, but I'm even happier for the guys.

My legs are wrapped around my sweaty and out of breath boyfriend as he reached over and locked the door.

"Two days without you, so I need a fix." He kissed me again.

He set me down on the counter and pulled off my jeans. Damn, I love his kisses.

It wasn't long until he was slamming into me, ignoring the knocks and bangs on the door. He grunted in my ear as he exploded inside me, then held me close as his body shook. His face buried into the crook of my neck. "God, I love you, Caroline." He tried to catch his breath.

"I love you too." I said.

"Dammit, I have to go, but when I get back, there will be no more secrets. I want to announce to the world how much I love you." He said.

"Me too." I kissed him again, before we had to pull ourselves back together so he can catch this flight. He has my house keys and everything needed. He kissed me long and hard, before I climbed on the bus to head out to New York.

I hate the idea of being without him for two nights. How am I going to survive a year?

Everyone celebrated on the bus, but I was a bit down. It feels strange without Cody, and I've got less than two weeks with him before I leave. I won't even get to see Jessie.

I gave Cody a list of things I'll need from home to take to Vienna. I'll get to say goodbye to my parents in D.C., because the tour conveniently stops there, and that's where I'll catch my flight. I didn't want to leave from Tennessee and miss days with Cody.

Even Lana has let loose and is laughing while celebrating her success. We have managed to change this girls world, and she will never have to go hungry again as long as she works hard and stays on a good path. She and Dean don't always get along, so I'm not sure what his deal is these days.

We agreed when I get back, we will work on finishing her education, and I'll help put her life in order. The guys have been given strict orders to guide her while I'm gone. Adjusting to fame sometimes can change a person.

I went back and fell asleep early because I'm exhausted. That was a grueling two-day concert series. I hope everything goes well in Tennessee for Cody. He needs this divorce, but he also needs time with Jessie. I'm just worried June will get cold feet.

Lana laid down with me in the middle of the night. She slept like a rock until we crossed the state line into New York. The poor thing has worked her tail off over the past few days.

Dean talked Lana and I into going shopping on our first day, then we all went out to dinner together. It was fun to finally wear a cocktail dress and have a night out. He even talked us into going to a club, which I only agreed to if Jamie and Jax stayed sober.

This is when I noticed something. Dean hasn't taken his eyes off Lana all night. Jamie talked her into a dance, and I watched as Dean stared the two of them down.

"She's had life experience you know?" I asked him.

"Yeah, poor thing had to raise herself, didn't she?" He responded.

"Yes, and somehow maintained her innocence. She'd be quite the catch Dean." I said, then noticed Lana look at Dean and smile.

"She's young." Was his response.

"Six years younger than us isn't too bad. You should take her out." I suggested, but he shook his head.

"Too innocent for me. She deserves a man that can offer her more than I ever could." He said, but I leaned into his ear.

"You already have given her more than any other man. She needs a protector. Someone that can make her his whole world. It's not like your lives would be spent apart. Just give it a try, before Curly and Moe over there give it a try. That would be a disaster." I said.

He took a swig of his beer. "I'll think about it."

"Remember, there's a fine line between love and hate." I said.

He turned his head and looked at me. "You're going to rip his heart out when you leave. That's what you should be worried about, Caroline." He got up and walked away.

I don't get it. Cody hasn't exactly said I needed to stay, and he's even helping me get ready to leave. I know he loves me, so why won't he ask me to stay?

I can't just give up Vienna. My father paid a great deal of money for this opportunity. I couldn't just throw it away without a very good reason. Leaving will be tearing my own heart out.

Lana and I are sharing a room because of a mix up with the reservation. She was asleep quicker than me. I just can't slQeep without Cody. I tossed and turned all night, and I even spoke to him on a video call. Nothing helped, when did my life become so dependant on him?