Swara thought she must have misheard at first when she heard him say those four words. But she knew it was the truth when she turned around to face him. One look at his face she knew his words were real enough.

Swara had imagined hearing those words for a long time. It seemed silly at times to pine away for three little words. She used to imagine how happy she could be if only she heard him say those words.

But in reality those words didn't bring her any happiness just a whole lot of anger and pain. He abandoned her because he loved her. Swara couldn't understand it and because she couldn't understand she felt disappointed with his answer than happiness.

All those months she had imagined million reasons for his abandonment, but when faced with his answer. She was confused and hurt instead.

"You love me, so you left me?  Does that make any sense to you Sanskar?" Swara spoke up still in disbelief that she was having this conversation with him. Her sister's wedding was perhaps not the place to have an heated argument with him, but he was the fool who choose to follow her when she ran away from him.

"Do you remember that night before I left? I was so jealous that you were going to date Mark and so intent on preventing that " Sanskar spoke up and Swara wanted to laugh at him for even reminding her of that day.

She had thought nothing but about that night for so long. She could even recite what transpired each second of it. She had been so hopeful that day when Sanskar gave her the first glimpse of him wanting to date her, but when she pushed him for confirmation he bolted without answer.

Every night after that she regretted pushing him for answer, regretted every single word spoke between them because in the end it was the reason he walked away from her. But no matter how many times she recalled that night and deconstructed it. She still doesn't understand why he left her.

" The day you left me without a word. Of course I remember. But what I don't understand is why, what made you run away that fast from me ?" Swara answered back hating that she was being vulnerable towards him.

"When I walked away that night, I never thought it would take me nine months to return. But when I walked away that night all I wanted was some time to sort out my heart and then Laksh called to tell me that he wasn't leaving after all . That he was in love and was so fortunate Ragini felt the same " Sanskar spoke up and Swara waited for him to tell something that would make her understand him but so far he was repeating everything she knew already.

"Swara, Laksh and Ragini were in love together and it was not complicated at all. They confessed and were happy together and I was happy for them but when I thought about us, it wasn't as clear as them. I wasn't free to love you wholly. You deserved more than what I could have given you back then and I couldn't stay behind and see you date someone else. So I ran away.

Swara, I was complicated mess back then. I know I liked you and even was falling for you, but I wasn't ready to surrender my whole heart either. Anything less than that would be undeserving of you.

If I stayed and selfishly demanded your heart when I can't do so in turn that would have only made us falter in the end. " Sanskar spoke up and Swara understood he believed them to be reason enough, but for Swara it wasn't enough of a reason because he made the decision on his own without asking her.

"So now your heart is whole enough to give it to me?" Swara asked him because from what she heard so far it has been his reason. She got his answer when he nodded his head in affirmative.

"But you broke mine Sanskar. So in the end it never really matters because it looks like we will never be whole enough to be with each other" Swara answered back and walked away from him. She expected him to say something to change her mind but his silence remained her answer.

*****************

Sujatha Ram Prasad Maheshwari should have been elated that her son came back home, but she wasn't because she knew his heart would break again today.

Sujatha would have loved for Swara to forgive her son, but he wasn't here to see how much it cost Swara in those nine months. Sujatha can't really blame Swara for not forgiving him.

When you are the one with the whole truths of two person and yet unable to share it with the each other it was a torture. Sujatha knew her son, his reasons and his decision. Sujatha also knew Swara, her pain , her sadness and her heart break.

In the end there was nothing Sujatha could do except wait for the two of them to work it out. Her heart briefly felt the hope when she spied both of them talking, but Swara returned back with tears on her eyes crushing those hope as well.

Sujatha wanted to comfort Swara but before she could Ragini was there for her sister holding her in an embrace. So Sujatha made her way towards her son because she knew he would need comfort just as much as Swara.

"Did you tell her everything?" Sujatha asked her son who was seated in one of the stairs with his head bent low as if the weight of the world was crushing him.

"No maa. " he answered back. Sujatha was his mother, so she understood her son even when she didn't completely agree with him.

"Sanskar, it isn't fair to Swara that she remains unaware of what you went through. I know you didn't want her to feel the guilt, but Sanskar it was an accident. Without the whole truth how do you expect her to forgive you?" Sujatha spoke up as she sat beside him.

"I know Maa. I will tell her, just not tonight. Let her get used to the fact that I returned first. Then I will tell her the reason I went away for so long " Sanskar answered back. Sujatha knew he would tell Swara when he was ready, she just hoped Swara was ready to face it when the time comes.

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"I need to tell her Laksh" Ragini spoke up as she starred at her husband, it has been just few hours since they got married and they were having their first fight.

Ragini held on to the silence for 8 months, selfishly for her sister's sake to prevent her from feeling guilt. So she went along with the everyone else and kept Swara unaware of the truth.

"Bhai will tell her Ragini, it is not ours to share. I know we both expected that getting them to meet each other would be enough to sort it out but it has been nine months Ragini, we can't fix it all in a day" Laksh answered as he held her in his arms.

Ragini knew it was hurting him just as much as it hurts her. But when she saw her sister broke down earlier after talking with Sanskar. Ragini wondered if the truth would mend her sister's broken heart.

"But she didn't know the truth Laksh. How can it be fixed when she was being lied to by everyone around her " Ragini asked her husband wondering if her sister would ever be able to forgive her.

" Your sister loves Bhai and he loves her. They will make their way back to each other. Trust me Ragini. It might have taken Bhai this long to return, but he will not let Swara walk away without a fight " Laksh answered back and Ragini had to believe in him because if not she can never forgive herself for keeling the secret.

Ragini almost asked Laksh if they could postpone their honeymoon trip tonight because she wanted to be around her sister now that Sanskar had returned but in the end it had been Laksh who suggested they delay the trip for a week.

At moments like that Ragini was aware that there was no one who could understand her better than Laksh. She feels so happy that she found her happiness with him. If only her sister could have the same happiness than Ragini would have no regrets.

Ragini knew her sister's happiness lies with Sanskar. It has been nine months and still her sister loves him without faltering and she could only hope the truth wouldn't make her falter either.

********************

The last thing Swara wanted was to be around Sanskar. But when Laksh's mom asked Sanskar to drop Swara and her grandparents home, she knew they were trying in their ways to ensure Swara spend more time with him.

Swara expected her Grandparents to be bit distant with Sanskar. After all he broke her heart but during the car ride, they spoke to him as if nothing had happened in the last nine months and as if they adored him.

At the sight of their house, Swara felt a flicker of relief that didn't last for long because her grandmother invited him inside under the pretext of sending some of Ragini belonging with him.

Swara knew there was nothing left in the house that Ragini needed right away and she also knew Ragini was leaving tomorrow for her honeymoon. So she knew her Grandparents were making up an excuse to invite him inside.

Swara was fine with that, she will just go and lock herself in her room and pretend like he wasn't in her house. If he could go and live nine months away from her. She can do the same.

So she did hide in her room for the next one hour. She wasn't proud of it, but she felt like she had no other choice.

Because she was busy hiding away, she forgot to give her grandfather his medicine for the night. When her Dadi struggled to keep up with his medicines, Swara offered to take over and help her. She knew today would have been exhausting to her Dada.

Usually Swara would offer to massage his legs after a long day, but tonight because she was selfishly absorbed in her pain. She forgot to even give her Dada his medicine.

Feeling terribly guilty for her forgetfulness. Swara went to her grandparents room to check if he had taken his medicine. She didn't mean to eavesdrop when she walked inside the room as she was in a rush to rectify her mistake.

But when she heard his name, she stood still and listened without making a sound.

"It is a relief to see Sanskar today" her Dadi spoke up first.

"I know Ragini told us, he was getting better and he was fine. But seeing him walking without any assistance made it look as if that night didn't happen at all. I feared the boy would end up in an wheelchair like me, some burn wounds never fully heal they say and I am glad he was fine ....." her grandfather was still speaking but Swara couldn't hear anything beyond her own mind shouting at her that it wasn't a dream after all.

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P.S:" That is it for now. Let me know your thoughts and feedbacks. Hit the votes if you liked it "

Juanita Reid