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Chapter 39: Giving A Chance

After having a chat with her family, Swara was now adjusting in her new room. A small sigh left her lips as she glanced around, missing her old room. "What if I become too comfortable here and don't want to leave after Sameer comes back?" She thought to herself and laid on the bed, resting her head on the pillow while staring at the ceiling.

"It was embarrassing but I'm glad I sorted the awkwardness between me and them." She muttered to herself and sighed, "and hopefully slowly slowly, I'll get to know them and start feeling comfortable around them." She added and turned to the side, holding her phone straight after. She unlocked it and saw a miss call from Kavita.

Before she could call Kavita, a sudden phone call interrupted and she answered right away. "Why did you call?"

"I have something to tell you."

"What?"

"Look Swara, I know Sanskaar confessed his feelings to you and you rejected him."

Swara widened her eyes, starting to feel embarrassed. "He told, you?"

"Yes, why wouldn't he. I'm his best friend but Swara, you should've given him a chance."

She stayed silent, not knowing what to reply with and he continued speaking, "he's now leaving."

"Huh?" She was confused and sat up, holding her phone tightly and pressing it against her ear, fully focused now "what do you mean by leaving?"

"He told us he'll tell you next week but I couldn't keep it in. So I'm telling you now."

"Get to the point Sheesh, tell me clearly, leaving?"

"Yes, after you rejected him that dejected soul is now leaving us for 6 months. He's going London." 

"But. . . He said he'll continue being my friend. . . Why is he. . . Leaving?"

"You must be crazy Swara. I mean, if you rejected me then I wouldn't message you like that again. It would be awkward. And besides he said that you'll feel guilty for rejecting him if he's around so that fool is leaving."

Letters fumbled out of Swara's mouth yet not a single word was formed. She was clueless on how to react to this news because it was true, first thing it would be awkward and second thing she really would've felt guilty for rejecting him.

"I won't say stop him from leaving, but, if there's anything you can do then please do so. Or at least let's plan something together and make his last few days memorable."

"Hmm." The only expression that left her mouth and Sheesh soon disconnected the call.

She placed her phone down on the bed and exhaled, 'he's leaving.' That was the only thought that was on her mind. Not knowing why, a sudden sense of guilt attacked her and her eyes moistened. "It's my fault." She mumbled to herself and clenched her fists, frustrated with the way things were turning out.

She heard a knock on the door and calmed herself down, "yeah?"

The door opened and Ragini stepped inside, "can I crash in with you tonight?"

Swara nodded her head positively and Ragini walked towards the bed after closing the door. "I'm not usually the type to have sleepovers, but I don't know why I felt like this one was a must."

"Have you not had any sleepovers before?"

"When I was little a few but after that I didn't."

"Same, when I was little I did but after that I didn't."

Ragini sat on the bed, making herself comfortable while observing Swara's expressions.

"Are you okay?"

"Hmm."

"You don't look okay. Is there something troubling you?"

"Uh. . ."

"I may be the worst to come to for an advice but I'm a great listener."

Swara exhaled and nodded at Ragini, "there is a guy who confessed his feelings to me but I rejected him."

"Urgh." Ragini sighed, "boy drama. Is he giving you a headache?"

Swara shook her head negatively, "I avoided him for so long, but after I rejected him he said it was fine and that we could still be friends but now he's leaving for 6 months because he thinks if he stays around then I'd feel guilty towards him."

"Oh. . . But he's a coward for running away. I bet he couldn't stay around you because it'll hurt him instead so that's why he's leaving, cause to be honest if he said he'll remain your friend then he lied. You shouldn't have believed him in the first place."

"I, don't want him to leave."

"Hmmm?"

"I still want to be his friend." She honestly revealed and looked at Ragini, who started chuckling. "He's gone, don't hold onto him anymore. If you don't like him like that, he won't stay your friend. He'll distance himself. And you'd still wait for him to return but he wouldn't go back to being friends, cause Swara, those feelings don't die. They'll stay there forever, so it's simply hurtful to him. What if he stayed, watched you find someone else to love and then attended your marriage? In between, his heart would've crushed so many times."

Swara lowered her gazes, reflecting on Ragini's words, and Ragini continued "besides, if it's one of those boys you hang out with then you did great rejecting. You're so pretty, you can do better."

"Hmm."

"Why are you upset?"

"Huh?"

"You look upset, do you really like him that much?"

Swara was startled with Ragini's response, "what? No. I don't like him like that, I just feel bad that he's now leaving because of me."

"Which one was it?"

"Sanskaar."

"Sanskaar?" Ragini gave it a thought and his face flashed in front of her face, "him?"

Swara nodded her head and Ragini shook hers, "don't say yes to him."

"I didn't."

"He likes you?"

Swara nodded and Ragini rolled her eyes, "he's so rude, and he's plain annoying. You'll fight so much after marriage and. . ."

"Wait, marriage? Where did marriage come from?"

"Ah right, you've already rejected him, so it's cool."

Ragini continued observing Swara's expressions and sighed, "Swara don't do this."

"What?" Swara was confused and Ragini inched closer to her, "you like him don't you?"

"No."

"You didn't even hesitate. Which means you do like him."

"How?"

"If you hesitated and thought about it, and then said no then it's most likely you don't. But if you say no right away, then you don't want to believe it yourself. Look at you, you look like you're about to cry after hearing that he's leaving. Why would you look like this if you feel bad for him? You should simply just think 'it is what it is' but instead you're saying you don't want him to leave at all, so you want to hold onto him, because you like him."

"But. . ."

"You're confused about your feelings aren't you?" Ragini interrupted and Swara shrugged her shoulders as a response.

"Okay, tell me one thing. You don't want him to leave, right?" Swara nodded her head as a reply and Ragini added "why don't you want him to leave, think about that. Do you want to spend time with him, or see him spend time with the friend group?"

Swara began thinking about Ragini's questions, imagining what she possibly wanted with him staying. She could see herself with him, and everyone else, having fun.

"I want him having fun with all of us. I want him to hang out with us when we're having our meetings. I want him to be a part of everything we do together. I, don't want to loose a friend. I never had friends before, so I want to treasure all of them as much as I can. I want to keep them safe and close. I. . . Don't want them to abandon me." Swara honestly revealed with moist eyes and Ragini blinked at her in surprise.

"Swara. . ." She leaned closer and gave Swara a hug, Swara rested her head on Ragini's chest and started sobbing. "I'm sorry." Ragini apologised while Swara continued to sob.

XX

The next day, after her talk with Ragini yesterday night, Swara had decided to come clean to Sanskaar, and therefore she had rushed out of the house early in the morning just to meet him. Lucky for her, he agreed to meet her and made time just so he could come to her.

"What happened Swara? Is everything okay! Why did you call me here?" He worriedly rushed towards the table she was sat on, taking a seat on the chair opposite to her inside the coffee shop. 

"Am I not allowed to have a cup of coffee with you?" She answered his questions with a question, blinking at him with serious expressions.

He shook his head negatively, "you can. But, you never did before so I found it unusual, I thought something must've happened."

"Nothing happened." She bluntly replied and he held the menu in his hand, "what should I order?"

"When were you going to tell me?" She asked and he lifted his gazes from the menu, blinking at her "tell you what?"

"That, you were leaving." He was stunned to hear Swara and closed the menu, placing it down on the table. "How did you. . ."

"You lied to me." She cut him in between, sounding upset and glanced at him with disappointment. "You said it was fine if I said no and you'll stay as a friend, but now you're running away."

"I. . . I'm not. I actually have a business to attend there so that's why I'm going. It's not what you think. And who said I won't keep in touch, we'll always be friends Swara."

"You're just saying that now, but later on you'll distance yourself away from me even more."

"No, I wouldn't."

"You would."

"I wouldn't, trust me."

"You would. And how can I trust you when you didn't even bother telling me?"

"I wanted to tell you later on otherwise you would've gotten the wrong idea. You would've thought I am leaving after you rejected me, but I really have business to attend."

"For 6 months?"

"Yes, it's like a programme that I'm doing for more experience."

"So you're really not leaving because of me?" He shook his head negatively to her question and passed her a faint smile, but she could read his lie from his eyes. "Okay, that's a relief then." She further added and continued, "I won't have to say what I came here to say."

"What did you come here to say?"

"It doesn't matter anymore. Sorry I wasted your time." She uttered and stood up, picking her handbag up.

"Wait, now you're leaving? But, what about coffee?"

"You can drink it, I don't want it." She replied and started walking towards the exit.

He watched her leaving, 'is she upset I didn't tell her?' He thought to himself and sighed, standing up and deciding to follow her out.

"Swara, wait." He held her elbow, managing to stop her and stood in front of her. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you first."

"It's fine." She replied, freeing her elbow from his hold and walking past him. He followed her again, "why are you still angry?"

"I'm not."

"Then why are you leaving?"

"I have nothing to say or do anymore."

"What do you mean?" He was now slightly offended and stopped "was coming to me a waste of time for you?"

"Yes." She replied while continuing to walk and he was hurt by her words.

"I'm sorry for wasting your time." He uttered and turned around, starting to walk away.

She stopped and turned around, watching him walking away. She released a sigh, starting to feel bad. Mixed with her emotions, she decided to run after him, managing to catch up.

Holding his hand, she pulled it as she stopped and he turned around, facing her. "Sanskaar. . . I. . ."

"It's fine Swara. I can understand. I'm sorry for being a waste of time and shamelessly appearing in front of you when you don't want to see me. You must get tired of me."

"No, I. . ."

"You don't have to explain yourself." He freed his hand from her hold. "I'll be leaving soon." He added and turned around to leave, but Swara stood in front of him.

"I want to tell you something." She breathed out, consoling herself as she collected her thoughts and he blinked at her, "what?"

"I. . . Don't want you to leave." She honestly admitted, and he stared at her surprisingly. "I don't want you to leave if you're only leaving because of me."

"I'm. . ."

"I'm not stupid Sanskaar. I can see it. I know you're only leaving so that you don't make me uncomfortable. I don't want you to leave your friends and family because of me."

"That's not. . ."

"Sanskaar. I don't want to loose you."

He was startled by her sudden words which sounded like confession to him, but he let them slide as he knew it will be useless to have his hopes high.

"You have been there with me when I was struggling, you helped me with Shekhar, you helped me find my parents, you helped me reunite with my family, and I haven't done a single thing for you."

"You don't have to Swara. . ."

"Then what type of friend would that make me? Friendship should work two ways, you've helped me and now it should be my turn to help you. But you're running away."

"Swara. . ."

"I never said I hate you." She interrupted him and "I never said that I wouldn't like you."

He looked on and she continued, "I wouldn't know if I can like you if we don't try. Do you expect me to randomly have feelings for you when we don't spend a decent amount of time together? I do like you, but to get into the relationship you're looking for can't happen in one night. Give me time to make it happen."

"Swara." He held her by the shoulder, starting to see her panic. "Don't force yourself, you don't have to."

"I don't want you gone. I want you by my side. I spoke to Ragini, she said I'm attracted to you more than just a friend, and she told me to give you a chance."

"Swara. . ."

"I think I want to, we won't know unless I try. How could I know I wouldn't develop any feelings like that for you if we don't try at all. Let's do it." She confidently uttered, staring into his eyes while he shockingly gaped at her.

"But. . ."

"I hate all cringing cheesy romance stuff, so we will only go on dates for a week. Spend time with each other and see if something does spark off." She didn't let him continue and interrupted, "if it doesn't, we'll remain as friends."

He was too startled to speak and she held his hand, "let's finish off our morning coffee date." She started to walk back inside the coffee shop while dragging him with her.

To Be Continued
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I'm so sorry for the late update, next chapter will be the last chapter. We're finally getting there. Finally after a long time the end is near, I felt like with my inconsistent updates I've dragged this story for so long.

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