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ONE
the package deal
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"YOU'RE an idiot. You know that, right?"

"Since you reminded me five minutes ago, yes, I do."

"Just checking. Because you wouldn't think that, looking at you..."

     Celeste watches her younger twin roll his eyes in the plastic chair next to her, discomforted by the posture. She can recount a number of times where they have been in this exact predicament — going down together when Quincy threw a baseball at their grandmother's china vase, or their heads hung low outside the principal's office when the twins were caught doing each other's homework. But their careers in aviation that have since intertwined really take the cake. They certainly have plenty of stories from their time so far, most of them kicking off with a thrill-seeking Quincy and a horrified Celeste as his back-seater...

     Today is no different.

Now, they are pilot and WSO, waiting for a grilling from their Commander for something her adrenaline junkie brother started. It's not like she could help anything. She was in the back seat, trying to do her job.

     It's certainly not where she thought she would be in her thirties, still acting like she was her brother's ride or die. But then again... wasn't it a little bit true? Even if they weren't bound together by the same aircraft, Celeste thinks she would still take the fall for her brother, in spite of all his faults. Perhaps they would always be a package deal, much to the disdain of their colleagues or elders.

     As if to rub salt into the wound, a cluster of fellow aviators stroll by through the corridor, oozing with confidence and even a tinge of arrogance. One of them, a young woman with a sharp stare and a mischievous smile, notices the two twins sat there and flashes that said sly grin. "Bullseye, Cosmo. Buck's gonna give you a hard time again, huh?" Houdini asks — the call-sign obtained from her ability to out-manoeuvre the enemy, even in the stickiest situations, like an escape artist of the air. But like Quincy, she could also be a loose cannon. You never quite knew what she was going to pull out of the hat next. They certainly both reminded Celeste of someone...

     "Oh, me and Buck are good buddies now," Quincy shrugs, as if his commander is merely his grouchy High School teacher. "I can take him."

     "Of course, you wouldn't have to at all if you hadn't been so stupid," Celeste deadpans under her breath.

     "She's right, you know," agrees Moose, a stocky sweetcorn-blond pilot, rather un-creatively named after his Minnesotan roots.

     All of the aviators got their names in similar ways. Admittedly, some were more fearsome and fortunate than others. Quincy got his, Bullseye, for hitting the target every time, whether it was a dartboard or the enemy. Someone else from their squadron, Cheeto, got his name by having bright orangey-red hair like the food. Everyone had a story behind their name, proud or humiliating (mostly the latter) and it was the one they took to the skies with them.

     As for Cosmo, her name was written in the stars — literally. It was never going to be anything else.

     "Well, hopefully he doesn't keep you waiting longer," Houdini teases, eyeing the closed door from which behind a muffled phone conversation is going on. "Your afternoon's gonna be enough of a drag as it is. I'll see you guys around."

     "Yeah. See you."

     As the others walk away, Quincy bounces a little in his chair as he shoots a glance at Celeste — she sits like a statue, cold and unforgiving while glaring at him. Like a teenager, he rolls his eyes again and laments, "Come on. Don't look at me like that. I know it was stupid, I just couldn't help it."

     "Couldn't help it? Quince, I could let that slide when we were younger, but now?" she pauses, incredulously. "For fuck's sake, you're the one with a family if you burn in. You have a wife, and– and a kid on the way, god damn it!"

     "You're my family too."

     "I don't count—"

     "Of course you do."

     And then Quincy looks at her, in the special way that he does, and Celeste remembers why she finds it so hard to really hate him. It's all just meaningless talk.

     "One of these days, you'll throw yourself into some mess you can't get out of," she tells him. "And don't come crying to me on that day."

     "You know I will," Quincy replies with a wink.

     "Lieutenant Sterling."

     At the sound of their commander's voice, the twins immediately stand bolt upright to attention. Standing in the doorway is Commander Frank 'Buck' Donahue, who they barely noticed open the door. Realising the confusion of addressing them by their matching surnames, Buck sighs. "Both of you, actually," he clarifies, making the siblings subtly exchange a glance of dread. "Come on in."

     Moments later, the Sterling twins are stood in front of Buck's desk, waiting for him to address them. Sitting in the warm leather chair at his workspace, he picks up a white mug and takes a much-needed sip of coffee. Celeste inhales silently through her nose and feels slices of sunlight chip into her uniform through the blinds. Their commander finally stares up at them through the shadow of the ceiling fan, patience wearing thin.

     "So, either of you care to explain why we're here... again?" Buck asks gruffly. Unlike some other commanders who might tear into them and yell, instead they got a grouch with rusted blue eyes and no familiarity with the concept of smiling. He and Quincy already make an interesting pair.

     "We were heading back to the carrier, sir," Celeste interjects. "Upon your instructions."

     "Mhmm. And then what happened?"

     Her eyes slowly turn in their sockets to glare at Quincy, who sighs softly. "We were running out of fuel. It was too far to get back to base, so we took a little detour."

     "And I assume that's how you ended up in..." Buck wryly checks some paperwork on his desk, "a civilian airport with a runway barely long enough to stretch your arms across?"

     "Is that what is says on the paper, sir?"

     If Celeste could kick her brother right now, she would.

     "No, that was an exaggeration," Buck leans forward in his chair, "but this next part is not — could you have been any more stupid? Whatever happened to checking your fuel before you took off?"

     "With all due respect, sir, we didn't have time," she admits responsibly. "We were on alert."

     "Alright, then what about aerial re-fuelling?"

     "Sir, I stuck the landing," Quincy defends himself calmly. "It was risky, but I did it."

     "I know, Bullseye. Deadstick landings are one of the ballsiest things you can do, and if I'm being nice, I'll admit you're one of the few schmucks in this squadron who could pull one off the way you did. But you're not getting a damn medal or a gold star for it!" Buck is stood up now, circling to the front of the desk and folding his arms across his chest. Celeste keeps staring at the posters behind him, and the framed photographs of their younger commander with his own fellow pilots in years gone by. The man hisses an exasperated sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Not that any of this matters now..."

     Celeste furrows her brows. "Excuse me, sir?"

     "Just before I called you both in, I got a call asking for you both to get your asses over to North Island immediately."

     North Island? The twins are instantly drawn to one another's confused expressions like magnets. A million questions flash through their heads at the speed of light, which their commander soon attempts to dispel. Leaning back on his desk slightly, Buck coughs a little against the roughness of his voice.

     "I can't say what it's for, I don't know. Some top secret mission. I guess it makes sense..." he says with a shrug, examining the two aviators separately. "Bullseye, you've got real nerve, but somehow you're also one of our best pilots. You're also slightly saner than Houdini, which is always something. And Cosmo — well, I can just say I've met few wizzos as dedicated to their job as you are. Together, you're kind of a package deal, which is what brings me to say this..."

     Celeste swallows thickly at the former compliment, absorbing every contour of every word like a sponge. And yet, it settles numbly into her mind, hardly leaving a lasting impact. As if she cannot afford to truly feel it. To get her hopes up too high, then come crashing down and be left scarred forever. Her breath instead hangs with anticipation, her mind already hopping on stepping stones to reach the conclusion that Buck confirms:

     "You've been called back to TOPGUN."

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"But why us? And, I mean, what for?" asks Quincy, now separate from his sister and condensed to a small rectangle on a propped-up smartphone. Unbeknownst to him, he is surrounded by suitcases and duffel bags being packed with clothes and other essentials, the only clue being that Celeste dips in and out of his view to pack something. God knows what his room looks like right now — probably like a bomb hit it.

     "I thought the idea of 'top secret' was that we don't know until we get there," Celeste fires back with a smirk, in the middle of folding a grey hoodie.

"I know, but you know what I mean! It must be pretty high stakes if it pulled us out of Buck's lectures again."

"Yeah, I guess..." she trails off. It was one of the first things that occurred to her. If she has been picked for something this confidential and potentially advanced, then she feels the need more than ever to prove herself. But then she is overridden with sibling mischief as she adds, "And by the way, I think you mean 'you' got pulled out of a lecture. I wasn't the one who decided to land us on a runway smaller than our school yard."

"Again with the exaggeration!" Quincy exclaims.

"Buck had a point, that's all I'm saying!"

He sticks his tongue out at her, and Celeste returns it — how ridiculous we look, she thinks, catching a glimpse of their rectangle-framed faces blowing raspberries at each other over FaceTime. Only Quincy Sterling could extract that kind of spirit out of her, as he often could with even the most timid of people. She's left chuckling to herself, until she smooths out a maroon sweater with a NASA badge sewn onto the heart. A muscle flares in her jaw as she glares at it for a moment... like it's mocking her. Her fingertips smooth over the pattern, tracing every letter and the stars twinkling on the stitched sky.

"Anyway, did you call Mom and Dad yet?"

Her brother's voice brings her back. Celeste snaps up to look at him, hastily chucking the sweater into one of the suitcases. "Yes, I uh– I did. We should be able to stay with them for as long as we need." Their parents lived near the TOPGUN base, where their father Manny worked as a helicopter pilot. The area in general had also been a base for many of their childhood memories, split between either there or their hometown of Jacksonville in the sticky Floridian heat. It was a house where Celeste and Quincy had also spent the latter part of their youth, remnants of their cringeworthy phases and childhood memorabilia still lingering in their rooms.

"Okay, thank God," Quincy wipes imaginary sweat from his brow. "I was worrying about the commute otherwise. And hey, at least we get Mom's meatloaf for a little while, right?"

"I swear, all you ever think about is food," says a third voice on the FaceTime. From behind Quincy, a very familiar woman breezes onto the screen and wraps her arms around him from behind, the task made a little harder because of her growing pregnant belly. Then the wife wiggles her fingers through the screen. "Hey, Celeste," she greets her.

"Hi, Felicia," Celeste smiles and stops packing for a moment, crouching down to get a better view of her sister-in-law. "Sorry I'm stealing Quince away from you for a little while."

"Oh, you can have him, he drives me crazy," she says endearingly.

"What is up with everyone today? It's like they have a personal vendetta against me!" Quincy huffs, pretending to be irritated, but is visibly delighted at the kiss his wife presses to his temple from behind.

From the other side of the screen in her empty room, Celeste shakes her head at him. How on Earth he bagged such a girl, she has no idea. All she remembers is that it was at some bar not far from base, and she had been sitting at one of the stools. Quincy knew from the first moment he laid eyes on Felicia — she saw a soft tenderness in her brother's eyes she rarely bore witness to. One thing led to another, and one jukebox song later, Quincy had roped the whole bar into helping him serenade the girl with his rendition of 'It Had To Be You'. Three years after that, they were slow-dancing to it as bride and groom, and another two years after that, they are now expecting their first child.

Celeste can't say she has thought deeply about the idea of settling down. Quincy would probably say she is married to her work. In all honesty, a while ago she decided there would be no one out there for her — the commitment just wouldn't last the long run. Who would put up with supporting her career in the navy, travelling around the country with her without complaint, putting up with long periods of time apart?

Some people are built for that love, she thinks, and others are not. Only one Sterling twin fits that bill.

"How many months in are you?" Celeste asks the pregnant woman, out of courtesy.

"I'm four months now," Felicia says, and turns around to show her belly's side profile, following eager egging-on from her husband. "And speaking of which, I'm getting pretty hungry. I'm gonna whack that pizza in the oven... what do you say, pepperoni or mushroom?"

"You know I'm pepperoni through and through, baby. Love you..." Quincy murmurs back to his wife, and they share a quick kiss. Celeste sits awkwardly on the other end, knowing this conversation doesn't involve her now. When her brother turns back to face her, he shrugs innocently. "Well, I guess that means I'd better wrap it up soon. You eating anything exciting for dinner tonight?"

"I don't know. I was thinking I might just order some Chinese."

"Jealousy..." he mouths. "All Felicia wants is pizza right now. I never thought I'd get sick of pepperoni, but I think it might be happening. But remember — Mom's meatloaf! Very soon!"

"Jesus, you really do think about food all the time, don't you?"

"Give me a break, I want a good meal before chucking it up on this 'top secret' mission."

"Alright, I'll go and let you have your—"

"Do you think—"

"Sorry, what? Hello? You still there?" Both siblings freeze for a moment, after the overlap of their voices arouses confusion over whether the line is still strong.

"I'm still here," Quincy replies. "I was just asking if you think the others will be there. You know... Ryan. Lu. Bradley."

Celeste pauses contemplatively. Why did he have to emphasise that name? Her breath catches in her throat, memories bursting open over her like a broken dam with rushing water. Before it can show on the outside, she tries to block the floodgate of question marks in her mind with a simple reply: "I doubt it. You know what it's like — all of us being in one place at the same time is about as rare as a total solar eclipse."

     "Alright, you little nerd... I guess that's me signing off then. I'll see you tomorrow, bags packed."

     "My bags packed. Yours in a mess."

     "And the exaggeration persists..."

     "Bye, Quince," she grins, reaching to press the red button on the touchscreen.

     "Later, nerd."

     Celeste hangs up so he doesn't see her roll her eyes. The silence that then spills over the room is deafening. No music, no chatter, just solitude. She usually likes it this way — truly, her own company is often solace, especially when she's practically grown up with a living foghorn for a brother. But sometimes that's the problem, being alone with herself... it's when everything else catches up with her. All the unanswered questions and tense thoughts. And for that, there is only one remedy.

     Pushing open the glass sliding doors, she slips out onto the small terrace and sucks her arms back into her sleeves. Reliable as always, the stars are bright above her tonight, beckoning her to search. Immediately she spots Polaris, constant as always, and a wave of comfort washes over her like the tide. Celeste singles out Cygnus and Lyra in the map of constellations, who feel like old friends looking down on her.

When are you going to come visit us? they seem to ask.

I don't know, is all she can reply with. I really don't know.

Celeste hasn't known in a long time. She had been silenced by that thought even last night, as the Orinid meteor shower peaked over her, the heavens cracked open as if just for her. These moments she enjoyed having to herself — a piece of her could creep out then, the more vulnerable part which had gone into hiding after being beaten down many years ago. But now she's on her way to thirty-five, and Celeste still cannot tell that girl on the swings that she made it where she wanted to be...

This had all better be worth it in the end.

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AUTHOR'S NOTE

another chapter, another flying scene (kind of) dodged! i originally started with celeste & quincy up in the air, but without the framework of top gun: maverick scenes, i really struggled to get the terminology/science right, and i'm a sticker for perfection sooo... we have this instead. hope you enjoyed this first chapter though! it's just a little introduction to where the sterlings are now, and obviously setting up them returning to TOPGUN. buck, houdini, etc are all characters that just appear in this chapter, but what did you guys think of them? they had their brief time, but who knows? if i were crazy enough to do a spin-off, some could return... also you may have noticed that quincy may or may not look up to maverick (and the way he met his wife was 100% a reference to maverick and charlie in the original movie!)

next chapter involves arriving at TOPGUN, and the iconic great balls of fire scene, which will introduce grown up ryan & luisa, as well as good old ✨rooster✨

also speaking of miles teller, has anyone seen the movie whiplash? watched it for the first time last night and it was INSANE, such a powerful and anxiety-inducing film, don't think i drew breath in between lmao. also miles teller was absolutely phenomenal in it, he really did put his blood, sweat and tears into that role (no seriously, there was a lot of all 3 in this movie). anyway, would highly recommend it!

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published: january 19th, 2023