Word Count: 1173

Pairings: Sam Winchester x reader

Warnings: angst

A/N: Request From Tumblr, older story

Summary: You had agreed to help them, agreed to go with them to find the demons. The weight of it all hadn’t quite sunk yet and you couldn’t seem to focus, your thoughts running rampant. Luckily Sam had gotten pretty good at distracting you from it all. Unfortunately sooner or later it's all bound to catch up with you and you don't know if you'll be able to handle it then.

……………………………………………………..

The car ride to the motel they had been staying in was filled with awkward silence and tension. They didn’t try to talk to you, aware that you probably wouldn’t reply. In fact, you had been so lost in your thoughts you hadn’t even realized when the car had stopped.

“Y/N?”

You blinked looking up at Dean, him and Sam were turned around in the front seat watching you carefully. You looked around, confused.

When had you gotten to the motel?

“You still with us?” Dean asked raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, sorry just a lot on my mind right now.” You muttered.

You flung the car door open, hurrying out before the brothers could say anything else. You waited for them to gather their stuff from the trunk.

“You seem to be a…on edge.” A voice said behind you.

You went to scream but it came out more of a squeak. You spun around, jumping back when you saw Castiel standing very close to you. You glanced at his wings before turning your attention back to him.

“What the hell!? Of course I’m on edge! This is the third time you appeared from nowhere!” You hissed.

You could hear Sam and Dean snickering behind you and turned your head to glare at them. You followed them to their room, warily eyeing Castiel the whole time, as if you expected him to just vanish. You awkwardly stood by the door, watching them as they unpacked. When you saw the duffle bags full of various weapons you instinctively backed up towards the door. Sam followed your line of sight and quickly stood up.

“You guys weren’t planning on luring me into a false sense of security and killing me right?” You asked timidly.

“No, these are for… how about you come with me to get some food?” Sam smiled.

You slowly nodded and Dean tossed Sam the keys to the Impala.

“Don’t forget my pie!” Dean shouted as Sam was closing the door.

Sam had kept the awkward silences to a minimum during the short trip to the diner. His questions, mainly consisted of asking about your childhood, or your favorite things. You were just thankful for the distraction. With how this week had gone, that small time of normality was a warm welcome.

“I keep thinking I’ll wake up and this would have all been a dream.” You said suddenly.

Sam had just parked the car and was ready to get when you said that. His hand fell away from the door, and he turned to face you.

“A good dream or a bad one?”

You stared at the food in your lap before shrugging.

“I don’t know yet…”

You got out of the car without another word, Sam close behind. You stopped so suddenly that Sam nearly ran into you.

“Y/N? What are you-”

“That man, his face… it looks wrong, like its distorted almost…” You said quietly.

Sam’s eyes landed on the man you were looking at and frowned. There didn’t seem to be anything wrong with the man.

“Are you sure?”

“I know what I see Sam. His eyes are black; he’s a demon.” You said firmly.

The younger Winchester decided not to argue and quickly ushered you inside the motel room.

“You’re back, did you get my-”

“There’s a demon in hall, Y/N saw him.” Sam said quickly.

You could practically feel the atmosphere fear of room shift into something heavy and dark. The three of them barely paid you any attention as they got their weapons ready.

“Were there anymore?” Castiel asked.

“No, I just saw the one.”

“There may be more, we need you to check again.”

You raised an eyebrow at the angel and Dean quickly jumped in before you got too angry with the demand.

“What Cass meant to say was please.”

“Yes, that is what I meant.”

You couldn’t help the small smile that tugged on your lips. That smile faded the second you stepped into the hall though. You pretended to go get more ice for your room as you subtly looked for anymore demons. By the time you had made it back to the room you had seen two more demons and was on the verge of a panic attack. You told them what you saw, trying to steady yourself while you did. Dean and Cass were out the door first but Sam lingered a few seconds longer.

“Lock the door behind me, don’t open it for anyone. We have a key, and we’ll let ourselves back in.”

You nodded and fumbled with the lock once Sam was gone. For a while all was quiet in the dusty motel room. You had even started skimming through a book you had found when a loud knock made you freeze. The knocking turned into pounding which began to rattle the door. You looked around frantically for somewhere to hide. The bathroom appeared to be the only place and you hurried in, locking the door behind you. You climbed into the bathtub pulling the curtain closed, and backing up as far as you could.

’I knew it. I’m going to die.’ You thought bitterly.

You heard the door to the motel being broken down and your heart dropped. The footsteps that walked towards the bathroom door seemed to echo loudly and you held your breath. Someone jiggled the door handle and you only had two thoughts running through your mind. The first was ’This is it’, and the second ’Is Sam ok?’. You didn’t know where that last thought came from, but you couldn’t stop thinking it.

“Hey!”

The voice sounded familiar but with how loudly the sound of your heart was pounding in ears, you couldn’t make out who it was. There was a series of grunts and crashes before everything fell silent. You held your breath, listening for anything that could indicate what was happening. There was a soft knock at the door, startling you slightly.

“Y/N? It’s Sam! Are you ok?”

You exhaled in relief and made your way to the door unlocking it. You slowly opened it and saw Sam visibly relax when he saw you were uninjured.

“Dean and Cass, are they….” You trailed off, not entirely sure what you expected.

“They’re fine, we all are.” Sam assured you.

You saw the body laying on the floor behind him and even though the man had been a demon, it was the first dead body you had seen. You felt a little sick to your stomach. Sam must have noticed you staring at the body because he stepped in front of you to block the view of the body. You suddenly felt physically tired as the reality of everything that happened finally sank in. You hugged Sam without warning, catching him off guard. You weren’t sure why you did that, but he didn’t seem to mind as he wrapped his arms around you.

“Are you ok Y/N?” Sam asked you softly.

You shook your head and he held you tighter.

“No, but I will be…”