Pony

"The truth is, you've always knew what you had. You just didn't know you were going to lose it."
{unknown}

//

I SAW KIERAN laying on the bed, lifeless, and my heart felt like it shattered into a million pieces. I promised Derek I would take care of her, and I did the exact opposite. Now, she's probably going to die and it's all because of me. I grabbed her pale, fragile hand and gently intertwined our fingers, planting a kiss on the back of her hand.

Once I stood up, Derek had to catch me from falling. I felt extremely light-headed, and my vision was a blur from all of the crying. "Here, you need to sit down." He instructed and pushed me down into the chair. He tossed me a water bottle, and I caught it, barely. 

I took a sip and cleared my throat. "When are the others coming?"

"They'll be here soon. Her grandpa sounded like he about had a heart attack when I told him. Poor guy, he's been through so much, I'm surprised he hasn't gone mad yet."

I closed my eyes and let my head fall back, it made a thump against the wall. "I'm sorry, Derek."

He knitted his eyebrows in confusion and sat on the edge of the hospital bed, facing towards me. "What do you mean you're sorry? You couldn't have stopped her, Pony. It's not your fault."

I shook my head and rubbed my hands across my face and through my hair, "No, I promised you I wouldn't let her get hurt, and now here we are. If I wouldn't have suggested going there in the first place, then this wouldn't have happened."

Derek gave a light chuckle. He gave Kieran's hand a light squeeze, hoping to see her move, but nothing happened. He gave a sad sigh and walked over to me, putting his hand on my shoulder. "This was not your fault, Ponyboy. If you keep blaming this on yourself, you'll go out of your mind. Kieran was the one that pushed you out of the way, and if she wouldn't have done that, you'd be in the same position as her right now. So, be thankful that Kieran loves you enough to risk her life for you. After all, she doesn't love a lot of people after what she's been through."

A small grin played across my lips, but faded when Kieran's grandpa and the gang entered the room. Her Gramps walked over slowly, he looked so fragile and broken that if you touched him, it would seem as if he would crumple over on the floor.

He glanced at Kieran's lifeless exterior and broke down in a heap of tears.

All of the guys were in tears, including, Dally. Kieran told me that they were fake dating, but I think Dally actually had feelings for her too, which makes everything worse.

Derek put his arm around, Corey, helping him up. "Corey, you need to sit down. You're crying too much, you need air in your lungs." He literally had to drag Kieran's grandpa to the chair beside me, but he finally got sat down. He glanced at me and patted my hand. "You know, Kieran, really loved you."

"Loved?"

"Well, loves. But in her condition right now, I don't think she'll make it." Her grandpa's voice barely inched above a whisper. He was shaking like crazy, and I rubbed his back. "Hey, if it's one thing Kieran taught us all, it's to always have hope. She can make it through this, I know she can."

Her grandpa gave a light smile and then it instantly went away. He clutched his chest, heavily breathing. His eyes went wide and Derek ran over to him. "Someone get a nurse!" He shouted.

Soda dashed out of the room and grabbed a nurse. They kicked all of us out of the room, and we had to wait in the waiting room. I started pacing back and forth, mumbling things to myself. I probably looked mental, but at the moment, I absolutely did not have a care left in my body.

"Ponyboy, maybe you should sit down and relax." Darry suggested, while pointing to a chair between him and Soda.

I felt anger surge through me like electricity. "How are y'all just sitting here not doing anything?! Kieran is probably going to die and now her grandpa just had a heart attack! It's all because of ME!" The whole hospital could hear me, and everyone turned their attention towards me.

"Pony..." Two-Bit spoke softly and I scoffed. I ran out of the hospital and all of the guys started calling after me. The howling wind slapped me in the face, and I was grateful for some fresh air. It was as dark as I felt outside, and there wasn't a star in sight. My legs carried me, and I didn't know where I was going.

Soon enough, I found my feet resting in front of the burned down church. It was just a pile of rubble, and there wasn't a trace of existence left. All of Johnny and I's memories here were in a heap of flames, along with what might be the last moments of Kieran's life.

I spotted a white note laying in between the explosives that hurt us. I furrowed my eyebrows and grabbed the note, hesitating whether or not to open it. Then again, it might say who the cold hearted bastards were that did this. My fingers found their way across the paper, and I read the sloppy handwriting.

Ponyboy Curtis.

Ah, Kieran always knew her parents told her to never play with fire.

You get burned.

Too soon?

You see, this was definitely all planned out. I bet you're wondering, 'how in the hell does this person know my name?'

Easy. Anyone who knows Kieran, knows you, Pony.

Her parents tried to keep her safe, so they moved away. But she still wasn't save, and I think deep down, Kieran knew that. We all know Kieran loves to keep secrets though, right? That's why when you two walked up here, she knew she had a bad feeling about it. She knew that today would be the day she'd die. Or maybe, she'll stay alive.

Trust me, she'd rather be dead than have us keep messing with her.

And now, you're our target.

Keep an eye out, Curtis. Don't go places by yourself.

Or are you already by yourself?

I could be watching you right now.

One down, one to go.

"I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul."- William Ernest Henley

I crumbled the piece of paper in my back pocket, and shot my head around in all directions. He could be watching me right now. I said a silent prayer, thanking God that I took track, and ran as fast as I ever have before. The only sound I could make out was the thumping of my heart in my eardrums.

Someone was after Kieran.

And now they're after me.

I ran inside the hospital, all of the guys jumping out of their chairs when they saw me. They all bombarded me with questions and that queasy feeling came back to me. "Guys, lay off of him." Dally snapped and the guys took a step away from me.

I collapsed on the chair and my breath started hitching. All of the guys looked at me worriedly and Derek's voice caused all of us to turn our heads towards him. He took a deep breath and I couldn't make out the expression on his face, which made me even more nervous.

"Kieran is going to make it."

All of the guys started hooting and hollering and jumping up and down. I sat there lifeless like Kieran was in the hospital bed and went back to what the letter said. Trust me, she'd rather be dead than have us keep messing with her.

Derek sighed and shook his head, his eyes getting glossy. "Guys!" They stopped celebrating and looked back towards him.

"Her grandpa didn't make it."

We all stood there, frozen. It was as if someone reached inside my chest, took out my soul, and stomped on it repeatedly. Kieran is going to be devastated. How is she going to take all of this in? I'm not only going to have to tell her that her Gramps died, but I also have to tell her someone is after her and me, trying to kill us.

I felt my throat go as dry as a desert and my mouth couldn't form any words.

"Pony?" Derek looked at me, his face full of concern.

It felt like someone hit me in the head with a baseball bat. I closed my eyes and collapsed on the ground, blacking out.

//

I warned y'all there was going to be a huge plot twist.