Before I Go ; Rise
A/N: This was written for a prompt on ao3, which was basically to write about an aro/ace character in a fandom that has less than 500 fics. I decided to write about Maashous Evers because I love him and I headcanon him as aroace and Rise has under 200 fics on ao3
(also the title makes this sound a lot more angsty than it actually is)
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Maashous shrunk away from Kaitlin's touch. Kaitlin looked hurt by his movement, but she didn't make any effort to be closer to him. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"No, no, it's fine." Kaitlin laughed nervously (she wasn't entirely sure what else to do in this situation) and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She kept her eyes trained on the ground, knowing she wouldn't be able to look Maashous in the eye right now. Or maybe ever again. "I know, you probably just see me as a naïve little girl, and that's completely fine, I just--"
"Kaitlin," Maashous interrupted her rambling. Kaitlin glanced up at him. She bit her lip in order to stop herself from saying anything else stupid. "It's not that. You're a nice girl, really, and I could say something like 'Maybe when you're older', but... I don't want to give you false hope."
"It's fine if you don't like me like that," Kaitlin assured him. "This is a really weird situation, I know."
"I--" Maashous cut himself off in order to rephrase his thoughts. "Kaitlin, I need you to not take this personally, okay?"
Kaitlin looked worried at that, but she nodded slowly.
"I don't... It's not... It's not just you who I don't like 'like that'. I-- I don't usually tell people this, but I'm a-- I'm not romantically attracted to... to anyone."
Kaitlin frowned, looking as if she was trying to comprehend what Maashous had just told her. Maashous was kind of wondering if maybe telling an eighth grader he was aromantic was not the best decision, but it was also kind of too late to take it back now. "So... what's that called?"
"What?"
"Like, when boys only like boys, they're gay. When someone likes both girls and boys, they're bi. But I haven't heard of people liking no one before," Kaitlin explained. "So does it have a name like that?"
"Oh." Maashous hadn't expected Kaitlin to know much beyond the word 'gay'. From what he could tell, Mr. Mazzu was very accepting of people of all sexualities and genders (after all, Spring Awakening had featured a gay couple, and he had been completely fine with casting Michael as a male character), but Maashous had never heard of parents educating their kids on stuff like that. Kids generally learned about different sexualities and gender identities on their own by sifting through Tumblr posts, trying to figure out what's accurate and what's made up. Although, maybe that was exactly what Kaitlin had done. "I, uh... it's called aromantic. Aro, for short."
Kaitlin nodded thoughtfully. "So why don't you tell a lot of people about it? It's not like you're doing anything wrong. I mean, I know people think being gay is wrong because of religion, but not liking romance doesn't go against anything I've ever heard of."
Maashous sighed. There was really no easy way to answer Kaitlin's question without the hard truth of it all. "A lot of people don't believe it's real. I think because they experience romantic attraction, they can't imagine not experiencing it. Even some people who are gay and bi don't think it's real, or they want to exclude us from the community because they don't believe we're 'gay enough'. That's why I don't generally tell people; because very few people react like you did. The only other person I've ever told is Michael. He was the one who introduced me to the term aromantic, actually."
"That's horrible."
"Yeah, pretty much."
The two were silent for a minute before Kaitlin spoke up again. "Are you gonna tell your mom once you move back in with her?"
Maashous shrugged. "I'm not sure. I don't even know how she views gay people, and I'd prefer to figure that out before I even consider coming out to her as aromantic. I don't want to move in with her only to be kicked out for something I can't control two days later."
"Well if she does kick you out, you can always come back here," Kaitlin offered in a tone that made it sound more like a joke than it actually was.
Maashous smiled. "Yeah, I guess I probably can. Thanks for being so accepting. I wasn't sure how well that was going to go."
"My parents have always taught us to be accepting of everyone," Kaitlin explained. "Not only that, but it's just the kind thing to do. I can't imagine hating someone because of who they fall in love with. Or don't fall in love with, for that matter."
"Me neither."
---
"What's this?" Michael asked, looking at Maashous' backpack. There was now a small pin on it that was the colors of the aromantic pride flag.
Maashous glanced over at Michael to see what he was looking at. When he saw the other boy pointing at the pin, he grinned. "A gift from Kaitlin. One of Mr. Mazzu's daughters."
Michael's eyes widened. "You told her?" He was clearly bewildered by Maashous' decision to come out to Kaitlin.
"I kind of felt like I had to after she told me that she had a crush on me," Maashous explained. "She took it really well, especially for a fourteen-year-old who had just been rejected. She gave me that pin the next day and told me that I didn't have to show it off, but to at least keep it as a reminder that there are people who support me no matter where I go."
Michael smiled. "That was really sweet of her."
"Yeah." Maashous walked over and sat down next to Michael. "I'm gonna miss them when I move back in with my mom. But I'm glad I came out to Kaitlin before I left. That way she can move on to someone who can love her back and she can know that it never would have worked out between us no matter how long I stayed in Stanton. She deserves a great guy."
"You are a great guy, Maashous."
"I mean a great guy who isn't aromantic," Maashous clarified. "And I'm really not that great."
"You are," Michael argued. He sighed and looked at the ground. "I'm gonna miss you once you leave."
"I'm gonna miss you too."
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