chapter forty-eight ━ the aftermath
( season nine, episode two )

❝You don't get to scare me like
that again. You hear me?❞

ELLIE STIRRED AWAKE to the sound of familiar voices shouting around her. She took in her surroundings; she looked to be inside a hospital—but not Seattle Grace.

"She never had to be on that plane, Hunt!" She looked around at the voice and saw Jackson standing at the foot of her bed with Owen. "It wasn't necessary for her to be doing that surgery! They could have done it without an orthosurgeon."

Owen sighed. "Avery, I know you're upset—"

"Upset?" he repeated, raising his eyebrows. "Upset would be an understatement. They crashed, Hunt! They crashed and none of them will ever forget it. You know they won't. And Ellie certainly can't."

"J—" Ellie coughed from how hoarse her voice was. Jackson looked over at her voice and relief instantly flooded his face.

"Hey, hey, you're safe," he said, moving to the side of her bed. "You're all okay."

She blinked, the events of the plane crashing slowly coming back to her. "Mark?" she asked hesitantly. "Is—Is he...? Derek?"

"He's okay," he told her and she nodded to herself, sitting upright with a groan. "So is Derek."

"And Lexie?" she asked and his face fell; she forgot. "What about Lexie? How is she?"

Jackson pressed his lips together. "Ellie..." She looked over at him. "Lexie's dead."

She stared at him as the memory flooded her mind. Lexie's last words; Mark's cries as he echoed the same phrase.

"Oh, yeah..." She nodded and brought her legs up to her chest. "Right. She was crushed by the back of the plane... We couldn't save her."

"There was nothing you could have done," he said and she shook her head. "You can't blame yourself for that, Ellie."

"We're surgeons," she mumbled and he sighed. "We're trained to save people, but we couldn't save her."

She rested her head on her knees, fidgeting with her fingers. Jackson let out a breath. "You can go now," he said to Owen who looked between them before nodding, closing the door behind him. He looked back at the blonde whose eyes were brimmed with tears.

He sat down on the bed near her feet and she briefly glanced up at him. "How is everyone else?" she asked, her voice breaking.

"Well..."

"Jackie."

He looked back at her and sighed. "Robbins is adamant about keeping her leg," he replied softly. "She's withholding consent to amputate. Um—Meredith seems okay given... everything. And Cristina is..."

"She's what?" Ellie asked.

"She's frozen," he answered and she raised her eyebrows. "She's staring off into space. She's not saying a word, either."

"She's the one who did everything," she said. "She was the one who told me how to help Mark. She's the one who kept Meredith from losing her mind. She tried to keep everyone awake. She never slept..."

"Ellie—"

"We tried to keep the bugs out of Arizona's leg," she continued, the memories swirling in her mind; how she wished she could forget. "You could see the bone sticking out; it'd be a miracle if she kept it. The infection probably reached the bone. So, someone should tell Callie. She's going to have a hard decision to make.

"And Derek... I sewed his skin together with a safety pin." Jackson shuffled closer to her as she held on tightly to her legs. "His screams of pain, Meredith's pleads for him to pass out—they're echoing. They—They won't leave. Everything won't stop echoing. Make it stop. Just make it stop. Please."

Jackson sighed softly and pulled her close, kissing the top of her head. "Then just listen to my voice. Not the echoes, just my voice..."

☀️

ELLIE LOOKED AROUND her apartment. It looked exactly the same as it had when she left for Boise even though everything had changed. There had been six doctors flying on a plane one day, and the next, there were five...

She glanced up when she heard a knock on the door. She hobbled over to the door with her broken ankle and opened it to see Callie holding Sofia. "Hi," she said in surprise. "Hi there, Sofia. What are you guys doing here?"

"Well, Jackson thought you might like some company," Callie replied and Ellie stepped to the side, letting them into her apartment. "And since I'm spending so much time at the hospital with both Arizona and Mark, I thought that you'd like to spend some time with Sofia."

Ellie smiled softly—the first real smile she had had in days. "I always have time for my little Sofia," she said, holding out her arms to her niece. Sofia laughed happily and gestured toward her aunt who held her in her arms. "How is Arizona?"

"She's—" Callie sighed as Ellie held onto Sofia tightly. "I don't know. I'm trying to find a way for her to keep her leg, but... You saw it; it seems doubtful."

Ellie nodded. "She's alive," she said quietly. "That's all that matters. She's alive and breathing. I know you'll make the right decision in the end—especially when it comes to Arizona's health."

"Thank you, Ellie." She kissed her daughter's forehead. "Well, have fun with Aunt Ellie, Sofia."

The blonde closed the door behind the orthosurgeon before looking down at her niece. "Looks like it's you and me, kid."

☀️

IT HAD BEEN a few weeks since the plane crash and everybody was still struggling with the aftermath. However, Mark was awake for the first time since being moved back to Seattle which was how Ellie found herself sitting on his bed next to him as the siblings watched Derek pace back and forth.

"It's not your fault," Mark told him after learning that Derek was unable to do a surgery. "You didn't force her to try your approach. If she couldn't pull off, then—"

"I could've pulled it off had I been in there," Derek interjected.

"You're gonna get back in there," Ellie said to him and he shook his head, still pacing the length of the room.

"No, I won't," he countered and she tilted her head. "I will be the former neurosurgeon Derek Shepherd, research librarian."

Mark frowned. "Shut up."

"Mark, the guy gave me eighty percent," he said.

"Well, get back to one hundred percent!"

Derek shook his head, his spirits falling with every passing day that his hand was still injured. "It's not gonna happen."

"Don't give me that crap," Mark said, moving his head back and forth as if he was watching a tennis match—it was only one person. "You love a hopeless case."

Derek nodded. "It's true. It's the only reason we're still friends." Ellie chuckled to herself; things were slowly starting to get back to... somewhat normal. "I'm glad you're doing better."

"Me, too," Mark said, wrapping an arm around his sister and she laid her head on his shoulder. "You will be, too. One hundred percent, you'll see. You'll get better, and once Ellie's ankle is fully healed, we'll both watch her be the kick-ass surgeon we know she will be."

Ellie smiled lightly. "There's the brother I know and love."

☀️

"ARE YOU SURE you don't want to go to the hospital?" Jackson asked Ellie a few weeks later. "I'm sure he'd like to see you."

"He's unconscious," she replied, shaking her head. "It won't matter. I—I can't see him; not when he looks like that. I can tell that he's giving up, Jackie. He's giving up."

"But—"

"Jackson, you know I love you, but you're not gonna win this argument," she said and he sighed to himself. "Just... go. And call me if there are any changes."

He nodded and kissed her cheek. "Okay."

Ellie watched him close the door to make the short drive to the hospital. She let out a heavy sigh and she sat down at the kitchen island. She looked down at her ankle and slowly rolled it. She had finally gotten her cast off and had been cleared to begin her fellowship.

But she wasn't ready. Especially not with the condition that Mark was in. And Owen had agreed to a later start.

Her eyes shifted to the framed photograph she kept on the table and she picked it up. It was her and Mark at her high school graduation. She traced her thumb over the glass across his face and smiled lightly.

"Please, please, please get better. Please."

She looked over when she heard her phone buzz and she looked down at the text from Jackson. She felt her heart drop to her stomach. "No, no, no, no..."

After hurriedly grabbing her jacket and keys, she ran into the hospital in a panic, stopping in front of Mark's room. "What happened?" she asked, looking up at her boyfriend. "Jackson, stop looking at me like that. What?"

He smiled at her. "Someone's been asking for you..."

She furrowed her brows as he stepped to the side and she looked into Mark's room. "Hey there, sunshine."

Mark had a teasing smile on her face and tears filled her eyes, walking inside. "You don't get to scare me like again. You hear me?"

He nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

"Okay." She kissed his cheek and hugged him tightly. "Okay..."

☀️

ELLIE STOOD OUTSIDE of Mark's room, her eyes scanning her brother's sleeping figure. "So... it was the surge?" she asked.

Richard nodded slowly. "I'm afraid so."

"Which means..." She bit her bottom lip and tilted her head. "Which means he's not gonna get better, right?"

"Miracles can always happen. Anything can happen," Richard told her before shaking his head. "But it seems unlikely." He cleared his throat. "Um—"

"What?" she asked as Jackson wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer. "What is it?"

Richard hesitated for a moment. "Mark filled out his directive," Jackson told her and she looked at him. "He said if he fell unconscious and there was no change in thirty days, then... he wants to be taken off of life support."

Ellie stared back at him. "What?"

"A few hours ago, he filled out the directive," Richard confirmed with a nod and she blinked at the information. "And he named you his power of attorney. His directive is very straightforward, which—"

"Which means it would be easier to unplug him?" she finished, looking back at the former chief of surgery. "Is that what you were gonna say? That it would be easier to unplug my brother because he made that decision?"

He shook his head. "No. Not at all."

Ellie let out a shaky breath. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry. I—I know you're just doing your job. You just... You just caught me by surprise is all..."

"I'm very sorry, Ellie," he said and she looked at him. "Truly."

"So—So now we just... wait?" she asked quietly. "We wait thirty days to see if there's any change? There's nothing we can do during that time? I have to wait thirty days to see if my brother is going to die?"

Richard nodded slowly. "I'm afraid so."

Ellie sighed and looked back into Mark's room, leaning close to Jackson. "So now we wait..."

☀️

━ author's note:

and thus begins the 'ellie and callie aren't as close' era

if you're an og reader, you know what i mean.

and for any other readers, just a little psa, callie is NOT on the board in this book