Emilia Shapiro

Once again, that annoying bitch Jackie strolls by and continues to make Jude uncomfortable. Why the hell is she pretty enough for a guy her age, but goes straight for the almost junior in high school instead?

Other than the blonde chick's shenanigans, I enjoyed our first date. We got to know one another over the best food on Earth that isn't Chick-Fil-A. 

"I'm so full." Jude sighs. Jude looks hot right now, and it's not just because his pale ass is now red and sweaty. Damp, dark strands of hair cling to his soaking wet forehead and those thick arms rest on the table. His polo hugs his glorious and hefty upper body. If there's one thing Jackie and I agree on, he is the cutest. 

I offer to take him home and hang out, but want to swim really bad. Jude goes along with it, letting me know that he's going to change.

Of course I have the same idea. I strip into just my bikini and start to head out. The full-length mirror decides to fuck with my confidence as I almost cry at the sight of my figure.

Being a girl who loves to eat isn't something to be ashamed of by any means. I hate how I always look pregnant after having a good meal. There's a lot of extra chub on my belly from earlier and I hope Jude doesn't notice. I hold my breath, but sucking in my lunch only works for so long. 

"Fuck." I sigh, pinching the fat along my waistline. 

I can't just dip now because I'm due for a liposuction, but a lot of guys don't seem to understand that being bigger than Bella Hadid isn't the end of the world. Jude may be one of them. He loves my curves, but I always feel a little vulnerable around him because he has the ability to change how he feels about me.

Tears prick my eyes as the what-ifs race through my mind when Jade's converses come into view. She's wearing a navy bikini but the bottoms are covered by a pair of shorts. Unlike me, abs are etched into her toned stomach. 

"Hey girl!" She gives me a hug from behind. I love Jade to bits, but her kindness makes the tears spill.

Concern laces her features. "What's the matter?"

I'm upfront about my insecurities, choking on sobs as I relay to her my feelings. Jackie's advances are included in my rant."What if I get body shamed or something?"

"I will hurt his ass for you." She reassures me. "But EJ, you're so fucking gorgeous. Even if Jude messes up, that won't change."

"I know. I'm just a little worried." 

"Understandable. You are stunning on the inside and out no matter what he says." Jade's words fill me with comfort. "You're so confident and light up every room."

Exhaling, I immediately feel better. "I needed that."

"I couldn't think of anyone more deserving." Jade smiles, making me swallow her into another hug. "Go and have fun, hot stuff. He's had a thing for you for the longest time."

"Don't just say what I want to hear, Jade."

"He adores you!" 

"Whatever you say." 

"Let's go, hot stuff." She pats my butt and a laugh escapes from my throat. "So this is what you hide in those big ass sweatpants."

I erupt with laughter. Once I compose myself, I inquire about Tori. 

"Tori? I love that girl so much. It's just...I have to keep in the back of my mind that she might not like girls." Jade visibly starts to deflate. 

"I think the feelings are mutual. She'd love to see you after she's back from Seaside."

Happiness re-enters Jade's system. "Did you hear? Ed asked Helena to marry him and she obviously said yes!"

"Yay!" I spot Jude in his polo and trunks. "There he is. See you."

"Aww." Jade holds onto my arm like a clingy child, but gives in and lets me go. I free my hair from the half up half down style I did and do a quick bun, then sit by him. 

"There she is." I'm trying my damndest not to poke those dimples. His face looks really cute and the way he smiles...don't get me started. 

"Hey, big guy." I whisper.

"I missed you." I can feel his eyes as he checks me out. "That bikini looks good on you."

My face gets warm. "Stop it!"

"Don't be so modest, Emilia Jocelyn. You're stunning." 

Part of me wants to laugh in his face because I'm in denial about how much he likes me. My heart gives in and I accept his compliment. 

He breaks the staring contest to wipe his face with his shirt. Holy shit.

The pudge on his tummy makes an appearance, deep red stretch marks lining the area south of his belly button.   Like me, he's a little bloated from lunch. Okay, little is an understatement. Either way, he looks soft and I hope we get the chance to cuddle. 

"It's far from over, big guy. This is where my girlfriends and I hang out."

Jude nods, peeling off his shirt. He immediately relaxes when his body is immersed in the warm water. Those blue eyes shut and breaths escape from his plump lips. Is it just me, or is he the cutest when he's sleepy? 

His leg touches mine, making my head feel like it's swimming. I rest my head on his collarbone for a little. Soon, I feel him stirring and he decides to awaken. A groan escapes from his throat as his eyes re-open. 

He smiles weakly. "Woah. Who are you and why are you on top of me?" His fingers are busy fidgeting with the fat on my thighs.

I smack his hand away from my leg. "Don't touch me then?" 

"Meanie." Jude chuckles.

Instead of speaking properly, I admire Jude. Jude's full lips and thick, black eyebrows remind me of a male Billie Eilish, gorgeous features complementing his well-chiseled jawline. His face indicates that he's catching some sun. 

"Earth to Emilia." Jude says, his cheeks getting rosy when he catches me checking him out. 

Embarrassment fills my system. "Shit." 

A guy and girl around our age join us, but I'm not sure when they came. Like Jude and I, they look like friends. Unlike us, they're cracking each other up instead of sharing silence. I wish Jude and I aren't as awkward as we are, but it is what it is. 

"We're in public, sunshine." The tall Hispanic guy says. Dark curls fall in front of his eyes and his abs are rock solid. If I had to guess, I believe he's Mexican and objectively handsome. One of his veiny hands fidgets with the cross chain around his neck while the other is around the girl. 

His strawberry blonde girlfriend is dying of laughter. She's my height, if not a little shorter and a little chubbier than me. She has braces and wears a bikini of a similar color to my own. The silver piercing in her navel makes me want one as well. In this relationship, it's clear she's the wild one who balances out her chill boyfriend. 

She kisses the cute Mexican on the cheek, making my heart lurch. "I'll stop." 

"They're having a good time." Jude comments.

The guy smiles. "Yeah, man." 

"This ain't as crowded as PV at all." The girl points out. 

We find out their names are Gavin and Riley. They go to Bishop Kenny and will be seniors this year. Gavin, the cute guy, plays baseball. Riley plays volleyball and basketball. Gavin and Jude seem to be getting along and Riley is a sweetheart. 

"You're really pretty." I tell Riley. She was pretty initially, but she should definitely model after seeing her up close. Her bluish-grey eyes come with long, thick eyelashes. A few freckles decorate her nose and cheeks.

She blushes, tucking her hair behind her ear to reveal a gold hoop earring. "No, you're prettier." 

"Nope." I laugh. "How do you like BK?"

"It's a great school. Have you ever played them for softball?"

"Yeah. They were the one team that beat us." 

"I heard that we're decent, but nothing special. I can't say the same about basketball, though. This season was a dumpster fire."

"Damn." 

"Hey girls." Jude sneaks up on me, hugging me from behind. 

I gasp after feeling his hands on my hips. "What the fuck, Jude? We're busy."

"I just wanted to tell you I'm using the bathroom, Emi." Jude looks a little hurt, making my heart break a little. 

"My fault. You're going to be missed." 

Riley and Gavin share a look as if they know something I don't. I smile awkwardly at the two of them and they start snickering. After a while, it gets annoying. 

"Is something funny, you two?" 

"Someone's a smitten kitten." Riley teases. "Is that your boyfriend?"

"No fucking way." I admit, ripping my hair out of the hair tie. "I'll be honest, he's kinda cute."

Gavin looks around like he has something to share. "I won't get into what he said, but Jude feels the same about you."

"I don't know, guys. Everyone at school is saying he's liked me since freshman year, but there's no telling."

Riley nods. "That's how I felt when I found out Gavin likes me. I didn't think it was real at first, but here we are a year and a half later." 

"I love that for y'all."

Gavin holds Riley protectively. "I don't know what I'd do without this one."

"Right back at ya, Alvarez." Riley ruffles her boyfriend's curly hair. Before I feel like too much of a third wheel, she turns to me. "Would you believe me if I told you that I was a size eight before we started dating?" 

Gavin's veiny hands travel to Riley's sides. "In my defense, I take good care of her."

"No kidding." Riley says. "Go for it, Emilia."

Gavin concurs with Riley. "You miss every shot you don't take, kid."

Before I can thank them for their wise words, the subject of our talk returns. Jude sits next to me and gives a tiny wave. 

"Did anything happen?" He inquires. 

The face I make tells the seniors to stay quiet. "No, Jude." Gavin finally says, making my heart rate stabilize. 

Jude and Gavin start talking about guy stuff while I talk to Riley about summer plans and how our respective school years went. I found out that she broke her collarbone, rolled her ankle, and recently suffered a nasty concussion, but Gavin was her silver lining and best caregiver she could ask for.

"Being hurt isn't fun, but it is what it is. Has softball done anything to you?"

"Well, other than messing up my knees, it hasn't." The thought of squatting in heavy catchers' gear every day for several hours brings back the soreness in my legs that comes after unbuckling it all. "I feel bad for you." 

"Let's hope I don't have to graduate with a broken bone." She deadpans, smiling like her concussion isn't killing her. Riley's pearly whites are perfect, indicating that the blue braces will be off in the near future. "Enough about me. How was your sophomore year?" 

Memories from this year I'd rather not be drilled into my brain resurface. Tenth grade wasn't terrible and the good definitely canceled out the bad, but the heartbreak I had to endure rocked my world enough to remember my year for what went wrong. "Not great." 

Riley doesn't question it: "It happens to the best of us, sweet girl."

"I already fucking love you."