"As medical students, it is expected of you to know every angle of the human body and it's organs.."

I'm staring blankly sa malaking bintana sa room, it's been three days since I saw Ali again, kahapon yung libing ng lola niya and today's her flight.

Parang ambilis lang ulit ng lahat, I'm losing her again even before I had her.

"The calculation of heart rate for example, is a very important knowledge for you people, you should know the normal heart rate of an adult, may they be diagnosed of tachycardia or bradycardia.."

I tapped my pen sa binder, I don't feel like engaging in class today. Parang mabigat lang lahat, bakit kasi hindi ako naging matapang nung oras na kinailangan ko siyang ipaglaban?

"Now reading an ECG of a patient is seemingly a very easy task, isn't it?"

Half the class seems to disagree so I just scoffed, I'm just not in the zone right now, even Ella and Keily is hesitant to talk to me with the aura I put up.

"You've learnt how to read it before, but that's when the heart rate is normal.. what if it's not?  what if the first method doesn't work, Ms. Fajardo?"

I got startled when my name was called, napansin ata ni prof na nakatulala ako sa bintana.

I stood up and faced him walking up to our line.

"You count the number of complexes on the rhythm strip wherein each rhythm strip is typically 10 seconds long.. then multiply the number of complexes by 6 thus giving you the average number of complexes in 1 minute.."

He smiled proudly which made me roll my eyes.

"Can someone else explain what a rythm strip is?" he walked down papunta sa front mini stage.

I sighed as I sat down.

"Huy okay ka lang?" rinig kong tanong ni Keily.

"Nakasagot nga e, okay lang yan" pagsingit ni Ella sa gitna namin.

I just smirked bago tumingin ulit sa bintana.

Going through Ali leaving before was a hell of a road, in which I thought nalagpasan ko na.

Going through it again now is especially, differently cruel. Knowing I have nothing else to hold onto but the fact that she may never come back again.

I may never see her again, that night might be the last time I hug her, and I even failed to make it comfortable for the both of us.

That place might be the last reminder that we ever saw each other in a mark of a decade.

Why am I even fretting? I was again engulfed by fear that night, my coward showed again.

What I can't not think about is that maybe I wasn't the only one who didn't had enough courage that very minute.

Or am I just tripping?

I groaned catching everyone's attention.

"Is there a problem Ms. Fajardo?" everyone with prof was looking at me, I looked beside me and saw Ella's judging eyes.

"Gaga ka kase" she whispered habang nanggigigil.

Argh, bakit kasi napalakas yun.

"Uh no sir.. sorry" I apologized.

"Well, be sure" he replied.

I sighed before tugging my hair lightly.

"Get a hold of your self Sophia!" I told my self.

It's a good thing tatlo lang ang classes namin every wednesday, Keily went home already, si Ella naman naginvite na magclub with her dorm mates again.

Ewan ko ba tamang dorm talaga pinasukan niya, mga kauri niya kasama niya.

I told her may gagawin pa ako kahit wala naman, I just don't think mapapakalma ako sa ganung environment.

I'm sitting down sa library, I decided na dito na muna magstay since kailangan ko magrewrite ng notes kanina sa sobrang lutang ko anggulo gulo.

Ayoko munang umuwi, baka umiyak lang ako at magmukmok. Saka may wifi dito no, libreng libre.

"Ano ba'tong sulat na'to, i-imter-" I tried to read yung sinulat ko kanina, halos mahampas ko na sarili ko, bakit ba kasi angpangit ng sulat ko pag nagmamadali.

"Sophia" nagulat ako when I heard someone call my name from my right.

"Oh, Lance? bakit?" he was standing straight, in his black slacks, white shirt and navy blue trucker jacket.

"Well, I'm just here to ask if you have your module ready, umalis ka kanina agad sa class and I couldn't collect yours"

What? I was confused, anong module? shit may namiss ba ako, ano ba naman kasi iniisip ko, pano to?

"I- uhh.. wait.." I stuttered before pretending to look for something in my bag, baka makalusot ako hindi ako mapahiya.

Then I heard him chuckling.

"Hey I'm just joking" he laughed.

I was left dumbfounded with his teasing.

My mouth was open in shock before I bit my lip and closed my eyes sa hiya.

"Hayup na yan" I mumbled.

"Hahaha what is it?" he asked.

I faked smiled at him.

"Ah hahaha wala naman, joke lang rin" I tried to keep my cool, ngayon pa talaga ako pagtritripan nito ha.

"Oh haha, so can I seat here?" he pointed to the seat infront of me.

"Hmm" I nodded still smiling.

I watched him drop his brown leather shoulder bag sa table before plopping down to seat, still smiling.

He raised both her eyebrows at me and grinned.

"Got you there, didn't I?"

"Fine, yeah" I chuckled.

With that I continued to rewrite my notes, Lance is just staring at me while I do my thing.

He put his cheek on his hand and his elbow sa table para sumandal and just looked straight at me tilting his head sideways.

"Uhh, can I help you? may kailangan ka pa ba?" I asked him.

He just smiled wider and shook his head.

"O-okay.." I looked at him like I was creeped out of what he's doing before going back to my notes.

I just heard him chuckle before seating back.

"You can talk to me" he said.

"What?" I asked trying to focus on what I'm writing.

"You can talk to me, tell me things, secrets.." I looked at him confused.

"I'll keep them, I'll probably forget them anyways, in exchange I can share some of mine"

I raised my eyebrows, what is he trying to say?

"Well, it's just you know, it might calm things down" he smiled not showing his teeth.

"Oh.." I slowly nodded.

I looked at my binder, nawalan na ako ng gana magsulat.

"Hahaha I mean now, you can talk to me now Sophia" he giggled.

"Ah, ah ganun ba?" I closed my binder and looked at him.

"Ahhh secret?" I asked.

He nodded waiting for my answer.

I tried hard to think. Ito na ata pinakamahabang paguusap namin ni Lance kaya medyo awkward magsabi ng sikreto no.

I'm just thinking why did he suddenly approach me, today? why now?

"Okay let's not start with secrets.. favorites nalang" he suggested sensing na nahihirapan ako magisip.

"Oh okay sure, my favorite perfume is Elizabeth Arden green tea" I started.

"Hmmm, mine's Bleu de Chanel" he answered.

"Wow sosyal" I teased him.

"Haha, it's a gift from my dad before me and my mom flew to Seattle when I was 12" he explained.

I kind of sense something in his voice, like he's happy with what he's saying but his eyes tell something else as he tries to look away.

"Oh hahaha ganun ba?" I tried to act like hindi ako nacurious bakit sila pumuntang Seattle.

"Yeah"

"Ah e ano namang favorite place mo sa Seattle?" I know I'm prying, ayoko namang manghimasok pero siya na rin nagsuggest na magopen up e.

"Oww there's a lot actually, but if I had to choose, Belltown really gets me, the best place to go bar-hopping" he answered with a happy voice.

His eyes sparkle when he talks about what he likes.

"And you? what's your favorite place here sa Philippines?" he suddenly asked.

"Oh, wow ahh.. hindi ko actually iniisip yan ah, let me think first" I honestly didn't know what to say, ano nga bang paborito kong lugar dito?

He just stared at me waiting for my answer.

"I can't think properly but for now I'll say Batangas" I had very good memories dun, Ali brought me home to her family that summer.

"Oooohh I'd really like to go there sometime, pag may time si dad? or pag may friends na ako hahaha" he laughed.

Wala ba siyang kaibigan?

I kind of pity him, bata pa siya umalis dito tapos babalik siya ngayon without anything to go back to kundi tatay niya lang, bakit kaya sila umalis.

"I can be a friend, start with me bago ka magrecruit ng iba papuntang Batangas" I smiled at him before reaching out my hand.

He grinned and shook my hand.

"Friends"

We shared laughters and other things that afternoon, it actually did feel great to let loose and not think about things for sometime.

I'm laying on my bed checking my phone when it suddenly vibrated.

@LanceArceo started following you

"Huh?.. Arceo?"

~~~~~~~

uwu :>