"Huh? anong pasa?" I tried to sound unsuspicious but Bri ain't taking my shit as she just stared at me raising her left eyebrow.

"Could've been better if you pretended that you didn't know of it too Soph, you're such a bad actress"

She laughed softly.

I sighed.

"Is it Jake?" lumaki ang mata ko, she remains this way after how long.

Alam niya what and who's bothering us kahit hindi namin sinasabi, even how we're bothered.

I looked away sa camera.

"Look at me Sophia, it's Jake, I know"

I looked at her.

"Just.. please don't bring it up kina Ella at Keily" I know lalo lang silang magagalit at magaalala.

"I won't" she answered instantly.

"And break up with that guy" she added.

I smiled.

"I miss you Bri"

She looked at me softly.

"Ew" her expression instantly changed to disgusted.

We just laughed.

Andami rin naming napagusapan last night, I didn't know I missed her that much.

But it always feel like we have something in between us we just don't want to talk about, that neither of us dares to bring up.

She wasn't here when everything happened between me and Ali, and ever since she knew, she chose not to meddle around things.

Siya ang pinakamature magisip samin, that's why I trust her with these things.

I want to ask her if she still talks to Ali, if she's okay, kung masaya ba siya kahit magisa siya dun, or kung may kasama ba siya.. na iba.

I shrugged my thoughts away habang nasa jeep on my way to school.

I'm wearing denim pants, tucked in white fit shirt and beige block heel. I reached for my phone in my black leather bag to text Ella.

Late na kasi ako nagising sa puyat ko kagabi, I'm not used na hindi maaga pumasok unless may emergency.

"Ella may prof na ba?"

"Oo"

"What? ano den ginagawa niyo?"

"Nakatunganga"

"Huh? kala ko ba may prof na?"

"Oo, sa kabilang klase"

"Damn you Els"

"Ok ingat"

I groaned sa replies ni Ella, ni hindi na ako nakapagayos sa pagmamadali, naka lip balm nga lang ako e.

I entered the room nang wala paring prof, thank God. But as soon as I sat down sa tabi ni Ella she looked at me with wide eyes.

"Hoy!!" napatakip ng bunganga si Keily nang tumingin siya sakin.

Tumingin ako sa tabi ko at likod not knowing kung anong nangyayari.

"Bitchesa ka! kunyari ka pang may bago kang cream, hayup kang gaga ka-"

"Goodmorning everyone"

Naputol yung sinasabi ni Ella when our prof came in.

"Mamaya ka saken" bulong ni Ella.

I was confused for a second until I realized na hindi ako nakapag lagay ng make up.

Shit.

Nagmadali akong ilugay yung nakabun kong buhok para medyo matakpan yung pasa ko sa pisngi.

"Tago pa nga" gigil ulit na bulong ni Ella habang umiiling lang si Keily.

Hay, I'm so dead.

My eye suddenly caught someone from the right side ng room na nakatingin, si Lance.

His eyebrows were furrowed while holding his pen seating back sa upuan.

He's not in his formal wear ngayon ah, naka black shirt at black ankle pants lang siya.

I looked away bago nakinig nalang sa lesson, I need to focus, nahihirapan ako sa Microchemistry e.

"Tangina Sophia! bakit ngayon mo lang sinabi?! shet naman di mo pa nga sana sasabihin kung hindi ko napansin!" nanggagalaiti na tanong ni Ella habang nasa field kami naglalakad.

"Sorry na nga e" paghingi ko ng tawad.

"Soph naman kasi, natulungan ka sana namin oh" singit ni Keily.

"I'm fine Keil, hindi na rin naman ako cinontact ni Jake simula kagabi e, I broke up with him.."  Ella rolled her eyes upon hearing his name.

"Pumayag ba siya?" tanong ni Keily.

"Well, noon hinde, I tried a couple of times pero he would contact me the next day and apologize.. "

"And?"

"And I've been expecting his call today, pero wala since kaninang umaga pa" 

It's kind of weird though, normally he would force me to come back even threaten me, pero ngayon wala, no sign of him.

"Don't even dare answer him pag cinontact ka pa, gusto mo sa apartment ko muna ikaw magstay for a week or two? makalayo lang dun sa gagong yun" suggest ni Ella at umirap.

I smiled softly.

"Thanks Els but I'm fine, I'll call if I need your rescuing."

I noticed Keily na parang may malalim na iniisip.

"Hoy gaga ano namang problema mo? binubogbog ka rin ba? o ikaw nambubugbog?" pagbibiro ni Ella.

"Naman kasi e!" pagiinarte ni Keily.

"Oh ano nga? sinong binugbog mo?" dagdag pa ni Ella.

"Hindi yon! ano lang, di niyo ba nabalitaan?" tanong niya.

"Huh? ano?" I asked curiously.

"Diba may pulis akong tito, e ano last week may drug bust operation sa isang politician sa lugar nila.."

"Oh kasabwat ka? kaya kinakabahan ka na?" singit na pangaasar ni Ella.

"What is it Keil?" I asked seriously.

"Ano.. ngayon kasi dinadawit nun si Alejandro Perez, diba tatay ni Jake yun?" mahinang tanong ni Keily.

I couldn't answer, kaya ba stressed out siya with his dad lately.

I thought of it hard.

"Ayan karma" sagot ni Ella.

"Huy ansama mo" pinalo siya ni Keily.

I was just thinking looking sa malayo.

"Huy Soph, okay ka lang?" nagaalalang tanong ni Keily.

"Pag ako hindi ako okay, duh drug Lord pala tatay ng ex ko no" pagirap ni Ella.

"Te maingay ka te" pagsaway ni Keily before looking at me.

"I'm fine Keil, nagulat lang din" I smiled weakly.

Pumasok na kami sa next class namin, I hurriedly sat down bago pa ako magbreakdown nanaman sa dami ng iniisip.

It's saturday, ugh I have a part time job every weekend, night shift ako sa overlooking cafe sa Tagaytay.

Ewan ko ba bakit ko tinanggap tong trabahong to e anlayo layo sa apartment ko, it's just that going back here brings back memories I try not to forget.

I miss her so much more everytime, weekends were our thing, Tagaytay was our thing, this cafe was our thing..

The sunflower has grown, almost up to my height, atleast this way I can make sure na hindi siya malalanta o mamamatay.

This is what's left of us na meron sakin, I can't let it go like how I did with her.

Wala namang masyadong tao pag gantong pamidnight na, sa hapon kasi sila lahat dumarating.

Saktong 12 am kasi kami nagsasara, 4 pm-12 am ang shift ko every saturday dito, umaga kasi trabaho ko every sunday since may service pag hapon.

I've been doing good financially, physically.. I've got to work on the 'emotionally' though.

I smiled while taking a deep breath sa may bay area.

"How I wish you were here boo.."

I closed my eyes as I'm about to cry remembering everything.

I woke up sa alarm this morning, it's the third month of the first year of med school.

It's bumming me out, pero pangarap ko to e, the're just nothing else for me if I give this up. I fell in love with this dream even before I fell in love with a person.

A person who dreamt it with me..

I put my hands sa mukha ko to get rid of the thought of her, she's been appearing in my dreams again.

I sighed. Ganun ko na ba siya kamiss?

Naligo nalang ako ng mabilis para hindi na ako makapagisip.

I wore my white and yellow striped collared shirt and tucked it in my cream colored ankle pants, before pairing it with my white rubber shoes.

I grabbed my small leather backpack bago umalis ng apartment para pumasok.

"Guysss! omg thank God it's friday nanaman" excited sa sambit ni Keily while we were eating lunch.

"Yeah finally, by the way magcluclubbing kami with dorm mates bukas, sama kayo?" pagaaya ni Ella bago sumubo ng adobo na order niya.

"Omg sure! let's go Soph?" tumingin sakin si Keily.

"Ah-  I.." I sighed.

"Sorry guys, may trabaho ako bukas diba" I apologized.

"Then ditch it!" sagot ni Ella.

"Gaga ka ba? ayokong matanggalan ng trabaho no" pagrarason ko.

"Bitchh anlayo kaya ng Tagaytay, dito ka maghanap sa paligid ligid lang" sagot niya.

I looked at her trying to tell her something.

Ella just groaned.

"Well, fine. I guess nagiging pahinga mo rin yan di na kita pipilitin, pero magtatampo parin ako" pagiinarte niya.

Keily and I just laughed before continuing to eat.

"Miss pwede makahingi ng dagdag sa sugar packet?" I got startled nang may nagsalita sa may counter.

It's already 10:56 pm kaya lutang na ako sa trabaho, andami ko pang iniisip kasi medyo nagiging hectic na sa school works.

"Ah yes ma'am" inabot ko yung pakete ng asukal kay ate bago umupo ulit sa maliit na swivel chair.

I sighed, this is getting tiring.

I looked out the window to my right para tingnan yung sunflower bed, medyo tanaw ko pa kasi from where I'm stationed lalo na pag walang harang na tao.

Then I saw someone standing, looking at it.

Naka black loose coat and white ankle pants with black rubber shoes.

Her long hair is black and wavy, she looked awfully familiar. Side profile lang nakikita ko kasi she's not facing my way but I think I know her.

Nakabulsa yung both hands niya sa coat while staring sa sunflowers seeming to think deep.

Is it..

"Miss can I have one black drip coffee please?" napatayo ako ng mabilis sa gulat when someone spoke.

"Ah, hmm yes po wait" I immediately started making the order without taking the payment first sa taranta ko.

"Ah 125 pesos po.." I was handing the customer his order when I realized who it is.

"Uhm, L-lance? right? from med school?" I tried to look calm para hindi nakakahiya pero mas lalo lang akong napahiya when I stuttered with his name.

He smirked. He's wearing a white shirt and gray sweatpants at naka gray windbreaker.

"Yes, and please take the money" what?

I realized na inaabot na pala niya yung pera sakin. Nakakahiya ka naman Sophia.

"Oh ah sorry.." I took the money from his hand. A 200 peso bill.

"Here's your change sir.." inabot ko yu ng 75 pesos sakanya but he didn't take it.

"Keep the change" he shortly answered.

"P-po?"

He chuckled but I was still confused.

"I have a dept sayo right?" I furrowed my brows trying to remember.

He laughed lightly while looking at me, but almost too manly, ambaba talaga ng boses niya.

"Soy milk, sa canteen, first day ng med school" he said.

"Oh- ahhh.. okay.." I finally remembered.

This is getting embarrassing.

"Pero 35 pesos lang yun diba? ah ata?" I asked.

He chuckled, smiley face nga siya, kanina pa tawa ng tawa e. Mukha ba akong clown?

"You did so much more, if you weren't there that time with me and if you didn't choose to help me, maybe I couldn't drink my favorite drink the time I really needed it" he explained.

"Ahh.. hahaha pareho pala tayo" I laughed awkwardly while fixing the counter saka yung mga ginamit kong panggawa ng order ni Lance.

He just smiled at me bago tuluyang lumabas sa may view deck.

I was about to sit down again when I remembered what I saw kanina sa may sunflower bed.

I quickly took my apron off before running to see kung andun pa yung babae.

"Ahh!" I massaged my knee when I got to the plants, medyo pataas kasi yung daan kaya nakakapagod.

I sighed, wala nang tao dito. Is she really who I think she is?

I looked around looking for someone when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

I gasped sa gulat bago humarap.

"Woah, chill.." si Lance.

"Oh! Ahh- bakit ka andito? I mean pwede mo namang tingnan yung sunflower pero-"

"Hey, I just saw you running, I thought you were in trouble so I chased you here, sorry I startled you" he cut me off.

"Ahh, hinde ano kasi.." I smiled.

"I thought I saw someone" I suddenly felt sad.

"Hmm? boyfriend mo?" he asked.

"Hahaha hinde" sagot ko.

"Ah.. " he shortly answered before pocketing his hands and looking around.

"I broke up with him three months ago" I said.

Ewan ko bakit bigla kong nasabi kay Lance, maybe I just needed to let everybody know na I'm finally off the hook to avoid their questions.

"Oh.. good, you took my advice" he chuckled.

I got confused.

"Di ka magtatanong?"

Umiling siya.

"What? nope, why?" he asked.

"Ah.. nothing" after nagstart kumalat yung chismis na dawit ang pamilya ni Jake sa drug issue, everyone just started asking me out of nowhere about it.

Lalo pa nung nagstart bumagsak yung businesses nila Jake sa iba't ibang branches.

Telecommunications kasi yung company ng dad niya, may nga call centers sila and even a broadcasting network.

But since that day na tinulungan ako ni Lance kay Jake hindi na siya nagparamdam, bigla nalang silang naglaho magpapamilya.

Ayaw kong magjudge but it seems na totoo yung paratang sakanila, why else would they ran away from it.

"I'll get going" paalam ni Lance bago naglakad paalis.

Naglakad na rin ako pabalik sa counter bago icheck yung phone ko, it's almost 12 am, magsasara na rin mamaya maya.

What got my attention is may missed calls from Ella and Keily mga 5 minutes ago.

I called Keily para tanungin kung bakit sila tumatawag but she wasn't answering, baka lasing na, diba magcluclubbing sila ngayon?

So I dialed Ella to ask her instead.

"Els? bakit kayo tumatawag?"

"Dumb bitch you didn't know?!" I can hear the faint music sa background.

"What? anong hindi ko alam?"

She sighed.

"Ali's grandma died last week, wednesday.."

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa gulat, is this true?

I gulped.

Is she really home?

~~~~~~~

uwu :<